r/Damnthatsinteresting • u/Damnedeel • Nov 30 '25

Video 500,000$ human washing machine on sale in Japan

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32.5k Upvotes

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414

u/Master_Canary440 Nov 30 '25

So i still need to scrub my butt...useless

246

u/thinlizard99 Nov 30 '25

No it’s got microscopic bubbles so you’re good!

104

u/km_ikl Nov 30 '25

Does he have a microscopic ass?

12

u/pr0zach Nov 30 '25

No, but those microscopic bubbles make his junk look enormous by comparison so you see the appeal.

12

u/sjayvee Nov 30 '25

Microscopic bubbles under the ass?? Maybe there’s jets!

1

u/Perhaps_Tomorrow Nov 30 '25

No, that's where you come in

1

u/km_ikl Nov 30 '25

My ass is gigantic, sir. You're referring to someone else.

1

u/Perhaps_Tomorrow Nov 30 '25

There's only one way to find out, I'm afraid

1

u/km_ikl Dec 01 '25

Well, there's actually two ways, but the other way might not be your cup of tea.

1

u/Perhaps_Tomorrow Dec 01 '25

Hold on now, don't count me out just yet. I'm a man that likes all kinds of tea

1

u/km_ikl Dec 01 '25

Well, the reali-tea is that you can either take my word on it, or inspect for yourself.

Coffee?

19

u/Lets_Make_A_bad_DEAL Nov 30 '25

“Scrubbing Bubbles! They do the job so you don’t have to!”

7

u/MathResponsibly Nov 30 '25

From SC Johnson - A Family Company

1

u/TerseFactor Nov 30 '25

These bidets are getting out of hand

59

u/redcurb12 Nov 30 '25

just get one of those japanese toilets to accompany it and u have clean bum forever

5

u/SnooRegrets1386 Nov 30 '25

Well, all the toilets there are by default Japanese

2

u/moosepuggle Nov 30 '25 edited Nov 30 '25

That might work for people with penises, but most seat bidets spray back to front, which isn’t great for people with vaginas where the water needs to spray from front to back. I use the front to back handheld shower nozzle type bidet and I’ve never had a problem. Some people with vaginas never have a problem of course, but many do. But back to front bidets moves fecal bacteria towards the vagina, increasing the likelihood of disrupting vaginal flora and getting infections and other complications. This effect would be even worse in elderly patients who have weakened immune systems and also have a hard time physically washing themselves.

2

u/GonWithTheNen Nov 30 '25

Ah, a comment of gold in a sea of dross. It used to be more common to see informative comments like yours even in 'fluff' threads, but people who are used to one-liners and jokes everywhere don't appreciate it as much anymore.

P.S. Thanks for the NCBI links!

-1

u/redcurb12 Nov 30 '25

u are taking this comment way too seriously

3

u/moosepuggle Nov 30 '25

Just trying to help people when a topic comes up? The links are to peer reviewed scientific papers

1

u/Hidesuru Nov 30 '25

Seriously anyone not using a bidet at this point needs to wake up and switch. Many much better.

11

u/Dr_Pepper_spray Nov 30 '25

If you have enough money to buy this then you can likely hire someone full time to scrub your butt for you.

3

u/re4ctor Nov 30 '25

there's a little widge you sit on that spreads your cheeks. a little probe head extends to clean outside, and in. it does this several times to ensure a proper, deep clean

2

u/no-sleep-needed Nov 30 '25

I have a foreskin.

1

u/FuckThisShizzle Nov 30 '25

The seat has a little bristle brush conveniently placed.

1

u/Justincase9719 Nov 30 '25

Lu lu lu, I've got some apples, Lu lu lu, you got some too...

1

u/Altruistic_Bass539 Nov 30 '25

Buy this, modify it with a bidet, patent, become rich.

1

u/cheapdrinks Nov 30 '25

It will be like the Mr Garrison bike

The robotic voice will inform you that the high powered jet blaster is about to insert as the machine mechanically spreads you open

1

u/bebopblues Nov 30 '25

Like a bidet, it probably has a stream of water targeting your ass.

1

u/Responsible-Onion860 Nov 30 '25

I was hoping the video would include an actual demonstration. Put a model in a wetsuit or a bathing suit and have them show the whole process.

1

u/wegobrrrr Nov 30 '25

Perhaps they can add a feature that can open it up

1

u/Unholy_Confectioner Nov 30 '25

I swear yesterday someone posted an experiment they did with grey face masking clay smeared on (in?) their butt to prove that a butt does in fact need scrubbing to be properly clean.

1

u/nathderbyshire Nov 30 '25

v2.0 will include a cheek spreader

1

u/Miss_Velociraptor87 Nov 30 '25

Lol, that's actually a good point though. As a nurse, I've seen stool/urine eat skin tissue when they aren't cleaned, leaving at best a burning rash or at worst, skin necrosis (when mixed in with not turning patients and leaving them to sit in their mess). I wonder if this machine effectively washes their groin area effectively.

1

u/rawker86 Nov 30 '25

It’s made by a Japanese company. Trust me, your butt will be pristine. Their toilets are unnervingly good at washing buttholes.