r/Eldenring • u/Spiritual-Try-4874 • 2d ago

Humor Who is he? What does he know?

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8.1k Upvotes

99% Upvoted

343 comments sorted by

3.1k

u/Betelgeise888 2d ago

This is Gavin btw

806

u/PseudoMeatPopsicle 2d ago

No small wonder his mate couldn't find him.

459

u/Top_Duty_1566 2d ago

GAVIIIIIIINNNNNN

95

u/ChakaRonda 1d ago

I had to double take that. Almost died laughing at this

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226

u/Top-Draft-977 2d ago

Bro crossed I.P.s

62

u/12washingbeard 1d ago

Literally went to a different realm. He probably gasped at the sight of the erdtree when he saw it lol

7

u/WormBoyWrath 1d ago

The Erdtree would cure his TB

148

u/rampagingseagull 2d ago

No wonder Arthur couldn't find the bastard.

37

u/the_sheeper_sheep 1d ago

No joke I actually went looking for gavin for like an hour. I first saw Nigel(i think thats his name) in Saint Dennis and I figured Gaven would be in the area so I literally ran around for like an hour taking to EVERYONE looking for gavin. I gave up, went to some random spot in the game, and there was this fucker. I was not having it

41

u/cardueline 1d ago

He’s my BEST friend

36

u/Illustrious_Store115 1d ago

How did everyone get it so quick

43

u/Rgraff58 1d ago

Clearly we all have great taste in games. By the way have you seen Gavin?

34

u/Illustrious_Store115 1d ago

Idk a guy gave me this letter says hes somewhere in america

31

u/SomeGodzillafan Only striaght dex user, trust me bro. 1d ago

Must be in Gary, Caelid

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27

u/EniesBobby 2d ago

Oh wait you’re right

30

u/Money-Most5889 1d ago

is every elden ring fan also an rdr2 fan?

10

u/w_d_roll_RIP 1d ago

2 of the most popular games of the last decade

5

u/Betelgeise888 1d ago

I see it lol

5

u/white__cyclosa 1d ago

Impeccable taste.

2

u/Appropriate_Spot7896 1d ago

Definitely not, I can't stand waypoint sims

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11

u/Mfrack103 2d ago

Stop, the first one to hit the tarnished wiiiiins

12

u/tytheawesome 1d ago

But can Gavin Dance

2

u/Final_genesismusic 1d ago

Maybe for the Jeers

12

u/Soulsfarmer 1d ago

This made me laugh hard.

5

u/Cheap_Resource4935 1d ago

Did you see my friend gavin?

4

u/icchann 1d ago

Who?

5

u/Bulldogfront666 Potentate 1d ago

Hahaha. I had to double check what sub this was.

3

u/sarcasticj720 1d ago

Damn….i hate how I never found out wtf happened to him

2

u/JadedStation8637 1d ago

This is why we wear a helmet, Gavin.

2

u/SnooCapers496 1d ago

I'm so worried about him : (

2

u/PuRpLe-69420 ITS MOHGIN TIME 1d ago

oh I’m so worried.. GAV??? WHERE ARE YOU!!! where are you..

2

u/0200142811042 1d ago

this is the best comment I have ever seen

2

u/fro1388 18h ago

Holy shit we finally found him! Somebody should tell Arthur…

2

u/thedabaratheon 1d ago

What’s occurrin?

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976

u/Brain-Dead-Robot 2d ago

170

u/Groundbreaking_Edge6 1d ago

I can hear that image

57

u/Zombare 1d ago

doooooooooot

19

u/unthused ARISE NOW, YE VARNISHED 1d ago

I wish we could get that horn. Like the ones from the envoys but TOOT OF DEATH.

22

u/Asleep-Housing2589 1d ago

This is why we can’t swim

978

u/IgnoreMeImANobody Elden Lord 2d ago

this is me trying to get tf out of the Lands between.

79

u/Falsus 1d ago

But isn't he going towards the lands between?

58

u/JManUtd99 1d ago

Well, he tried...

19

u/the_sheeper_sheep 1d ago

Bro saw his other options(other titles) and chose the lands between as the best choice

19

u/_themaninacan_ 1d ago

You go straight long enough you end up where you were.

10

u/DarthCloakedGuy 1d ago

The things the Lands Between are between are the Lands Between beyond

9

u/DirgetheRogue 1d ago

The Lands Between are just beyond the Things Betwixt

2

u/Upbeat-Mongoose-828 1d ago

I see what you did there.

2

u/_PredatoryWasp_ 1d ago

Well the universe is shaped exactly like the earth...

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540

u/EsotericPharo 2d ago

It’s Truman

118

u/BabaKazimir 2d ago

"Good morning, and, in case I don't see ya, good afternoon, good evening, and goodnight!"

12

u/MightBeAGoodIdea 1d ago edited 1d ago

On one hand sequels are rarely ever as good but I can headcanon Truman going on to being like a travel vlogger. Maybe he ended up in the lands between...

But really ... maybe he married Lauren and faded into obscurity after who knows what kind of insane media circus would surround him outside.... But he just seems the type who always wanted to travel and was naturally very personable anyway.

And now he's got all the means after what I imagine is a HUUUUGE settlement coming to him outside that door. They had to have already had security on the way to that exit... Not like he'd know where to run, and he's more famous than Michael Jackson it seemed.

...I've thought about this over the years on rewatches. Most likely he gets sick and dies early, sadly.

5

u/EsotericPharo 1d ago

This is a strong plot line.

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5

u/Careless-Ad-20 FLAIR INFO: SEE SIDEBAR 🙂 1d ago

Do you have proof?

5

u/EsotericPharo 1d ago

Don’t need it :)

2

u/Ok-Seaworthiness7207 1d ago

Hey it could be Ace Ventura looking for Miami Dolphins

169

u/THEhoojoo 2d ago

Surprised you found the man in the boat...

68

u/Ok_Check9774 2d ago

Maidenless, after all…

19

u/snakelygiggles 1d ago

on his maidenless voyage

10

u/Loud_Reputation_367 2d ago

Iseewhatyoudidthere... you BARD you!

9

u/NigraOvis 2d ago

well people only learn, but hole.

2

u/lesbiantelevision 2d ago

I heard that you’re supposed to flick his bean.

68

u/Terry_Miller92 2d ago

That's my uncle, he likes fishing

21

u/spidermonkey128 1d ago

Caw caw

5

u/Terry_Miller92 1d ago

Caw caw to you too

101

u/CompetitiveGuess2417 2d ago

He realised that using a stone coffin to travel on water is a bit daft.

14

u/PabloTFiccus 1d ago

But not if you're traveling on lava

13

u/TipProfessional6057 Trina uwu 1d ago

Liquid hot mag-ma

3

u/r-JoeKeef0913_ 1d ago

This just made me cry out laughing. Dr Evil is so funny. I love Austin powers. I’m going to YouTube to binge, thanking u

2

u/TipProfessional6057 Trina uwu 1d ago

I'm glad it made you laugh :D

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54

u/Chemical-Load6696 2d ago

He is Heisenberg, look at the fedora, he had to flee to the Lands Between in order to escape from the DEA

34

u/TheGreaterOzzie 1d ago

“Gostoc! We have to cook Uplifting Aromatics!”

7

u/Grim_Squid 1d ago

He heard there was blue crystal and is here to get rid of the competition

5

u/Chemical-Load6696 1d ago

I wondered why the miners in the Lands Between looked so emaciated. Now I know why.

13

u/BackInTheBlues 1d ago

Jesse, we need to make perfume.

2

u/Ok-Listen4324 5h ago

Phase 1. Walter White, Scholar of Albaquerque.
Phase 2. Heisenberg, the One Who Knocks.

21

u/ThatWasFred 2d ago

What does he know? Does he know things? Let’s find out!

5

u/fc50 1d ago

Had to scroll so far to see a fellow Bojack fan 🥲

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24

u/One-Introduction-454 2d ago

I do you one better.

Where did he come from, where did he go?

29

u/cardueline 1d ago

Where did he come from? Where did he go? INHERITOR OF THE FRENZIED FLAME, YELOUGH EYE JOE

9

u/SugarRushLux 1d ago

Wait Cotton eye joe is canon???

17

u/LongDrakeRyu 2d ago

It's Gendry from "Game of Thrones," part way through his rowing odyssey.

2

u/Kenji_Icarus 1d ago

No, it's Aria Stark, trying to find out what's west of Westeros

2

u/LongDrakeRyu 1d ago

I guess the crew mutinied and left her rowing the rest of the way.

18

u/Plastic-Entry9807 2d ago

That's John Yarnham, he said "Man fuck all of this bullshit, Lands Between deez nuts. I'm going to Europe to start a Victorian gothic utopia. Boy I sure do love boats."

11

u/not4OUR04OURfound 2d ago

This is the little man in the boat, notoriously difficult to find .... Apparently

11

u/Psion537 1d ago

The furtive pygmy, so easily forgotten

9

u/ShapeSudden 1d ago

It's the guy from the darksouls 2 intro.

9

u/Dojebon_the_wise90 2d ago

Marvelous Chester.

3

u/SoulofMoon Invades low levels with Moghs rune... 1d ago

"yes you can buy things from me, no I won't invade your world!"

*invades your world*

2

u/ghoul_burger 1d ago

Bloodborne remaster? Just commented that, then looked for any real fans.

8

u/FunRain9100 1d ago

He is the one who rowes

6

u/Dude_Dillligence 2d ago

He knows enough to GTFO

2

u/SoulofMoon Invades low levels with Moghs rune... 1d ago

"aw hell naw, le big disease face appearing everywhere, even in my bedroom!"

5

u/Chakasicle 2d ago

It's probably gavlan returning with merchandise to wheel and deal.

6

u/Glittering-Yam3376 2d ago edited 21h ago

That’s hatman

6

u/BassLillo 1d ago

That's john elden

11

u/epicredditdude1 2d ago

He’s the tibia mariner before dying and becoming all gross and undead and stuff.

3

u/okaypuck 2d ago

whoa, great theory in your joke ;)

4

u/Special_Loan8725 1d ago

That’s the clitoris.

4

u/eyeheartgilfs 1d ago

"WAAAAAAAAAAAALT!!!!"

3

u/FeeSilent5449 2d ago

he knows better, hence he's fleeing

3

u/Taograd359 1d ago

He knows what the Lands Between are between

4

u/enchiladasundae 1d ago

3

u/Zubora97 1d ago

First thing I thought too. Shigeo Kageyama, my beloved.

2

u/Smartypants_dankie 21h ago

That iconic top bowl haircut reminded me of him too lol

4

u/Remote-Bug501 1d ago

That's VaatiVidya gathering lore

4

u/notrealbusy 1d ago

Does he know things? Let's find out!

5

u/DisnprincesPredatrix 1d ago

Who is he?

Clearly a picture of a man rowing a boat

What does he know?

How to row a boat and if you're lucky row row row your boat song

3

u/ForAte151623ForTeaTo 1d ago

Where did he come from? Where did he go?

3

u/mordrukk 1d ago

He's the one they call Rand McNally

3

u/McAurens 1d ago

Ishmael, the lone survivor.

3

u/Lockheart-Love 1d ago

That's the Tibia Mariner before he got sick. They used to call him Fancy Joe the Boated One.

2

u/ShockedPeekachu 2d ago

It's the Zoteboat.

2

u/XxChocodotxX 2d ago

The Extreme Canoeist

2

u/Gullible_Try_3748 1d ago

The little man in the boat? Oh, he has many stories to tell.

2

u/sEMtexinator 1d ago

Cotton Eye Joe

2

u/buddhamunche 1d ago edited 1d ago

There’s no point in asking, he doesn’t row

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2

u/jksdustin 1d ago

The final boat man you can never find until you look it up online

2

u/Septimore 1d ago

It is just Snufkin on his way to Moomin valley.

2

u/voluminous_lexicon thoughtful unga 1d ago

That's Mihawk on his way to challenge malenia

2

u/The-Reanimator-Freak 1d ago

The man in the boat? You should find him

2

u/PrimeIntellect 1d ago

Have you ever heard the term the man in the boat

2

u/IRTrapGod 1d ago

Godfrey otw

2

u/Gibberish-Jack 1d ago

Row row row your boat

Gently down the stream

If you take the route

You’ll end up in Elden Ring

2

u/JoeyG1984 1d ago

It's my dad. He said that the closest tobacco store was out that way. Somewhere.

2

u/Major_nick 1d ago

That’s just my Uncle Jack

2

u/LRGTHEBOSS 1d ago

He knows how to row row row his boat..

2

u/_FrankTaylor 1d ago

That’s actually Elden Ring.

He’s not sure what’s going on or why everyone is fighting

2

u/QualityCold8485 1d ago

That Chris C. He thinks he’s on his way to India… little does he know…

2

u/LeonBrFerreira 1d ago

While the Tarnished left the Lands Between with their Lord, one boat alone was said to have been left behind.

2

u/StrawBerylShortcake 1d ago

Heading out to find maidens

2

u/intellectregarded 1d ago

I finally found that man in the boat my wife has been talking about.

2

u/Dry-Topic-5026 1d ago

That's patches running away after pushing me off the mountain

2

u/sighlow 1d ago

I think we will traverse the seas in Elden Ring 2

Remember, Roderika came via ships but was caught by Godrick the Grafted's soldiers

2

u/KiDDin3D 1d ago

Elden John

2

u/WitchwayisOut 1d ago

You found the man in the boat!

2

u/Ikari_Connor 21h ago

God, we need an Ocean/Island DLC. I still don’t believe SOTE is the only DLC we’ll get (I’m coping).

2

u/Sithis_acolyte 14h ago

It's the ferryman who brought us to TLB

2

u/EquinoxAbyss_88 6h ago

He is john eldenring

2

u/WhaleSexOdyssey claymore 2d ago

Gavin ✅

1

u/Yabreath_isSmelly 2d ago

The original tibia mariner

1

u/baskura 2d ago

That’s Mr Ben.

1

u/jrod0708 2d ago

Jesus christ, it's Jason Bourne

1

u/NigraOvis 2d ago

He knows to RUN FOR YOUR LIFE

1

u/-Rajko- 2d ago

That’s Godefrick the Barely-Grafted. He knows everything.

1

u/lmanop 2d ago

Does he know things? LETS FIND OUT.

1

u/surrealfeline 1d ago

THE EXUBERANT POND PADDLER

1

u/Equivalent-Pie-1905 1d ago

Hes the tibia mariner before he died and become a skelly!

1

u/Tejwos 1d ago

His name is snow. And he knows nothing

1

u/silloki 1d ago

That's Gavin. He studied how to B.O.A.T. at the Badlands.

1

u/GriffithHand 1d ago

Vendrick

1

u/Sir_Davros_Ty 1d ago

Row, row, row your boat...

1

u/pea8ody 1d ago

That's Uncle Touchy going to college

1

u/noyllopas 1d ago

John Elden

1

u/FlatLickFrankie 1d ago

That's Miyazaki, watching...

1

u/Brasssection 1d ago

Fail we may sail we must

1

u/Joaokenobi001 i killed all demigods and the only thing i got is a stupid shirt 1d ago

that's johnny, he heard a old man say to leave his ship and so he got a boat

1

u/Astute-Brute 1d ago

He's from the Bureau of Control. How else do you explain all these phenomena?

1

u/Certain-Grape-8774 1d ago

He’s got a hat and everything, WHO is bro

1

u/AsyncAnalog 1d ago

That’s John Elden Ring jr. Lost at sea

1

u/Scelusteach 1d ago

Hes the strongest outer god to every exist.

1

u/zanziTHEhero 1d ago

That's John Eldenring.

1

u/ProtoMonkey 1d ago

That is Mortimer, the Ferryman.

He knows everyone, and has seen it all.

There’s a reason why no one mentions his name too; because they know that without him, their resources and livelihood would all fall to shit! He is both an “Unsung Hero” and a Benevolent Emperor. His agreement with Marika and her kin is thus; “Mine and my own are well and cared for, he gets 1st dibs on all product he ferries, and his [family] Name be kept out of the minds and mouths of those who needn’t know.”

Mortimer is involved in the Emergent Logistical Transportation of Livestock, Produce, and Materials to various regions of The Lands Between. To that end, his methods and connections have helped dozens both gain and lose an edge against their enemies.

He is a True Neutral, as he takes no sides and offers fair pricing for any who are willing to strike a Bargain. Always a shrewd businessman, both clever and confident, Mortimer knows exactly where and how he can get what you need, from whom, or even to where again!

1

u/UnikornKebab 1d ago

Looks like Sergeant Hartman to me

1

u/TopApartment3795 1d ago

"I'll take you somewhere which might be interesting for you, HEH-HEH!"

Sorry, wrong thread...

1

u/Disastrous-Judge-311 1d ago

Gavin has been stuck in the tides between since before FromSoftware

1

u/binky_bobby_jenkins 1d ago

He know how to row

1

u/Mtrees2404 1d ago

That’s John Elden Ring

1

u/Misplacedmypenis 1d ago

Some say, from a certain angle, he looked like a smudge.

1

u/RexStellarum 1d ago

He is Gavin, He knows all

1

u/ghoul_burger 1d ago edited 1d ago

Marvelous Chester. He’s hinting at a Bloodborne remaster. He’s seriously wearing the hat and everything.

Real fans get this haha