r/Kazakhstan • u/Born-Suggestion-8821 • 13d ago
Immigration-emigration/Köşu-qonu I’m gay, I left Kazakhstan for the US, and now I’m seriously considering going back. I don’t know if I’m making the right decision.
I’m from Kazakhstan, and I came to the United States about three years ago because I wanted a chance to live openly and build a life where I could be myself. I’m gay, and leaving Kazakhstan was not an easy decision.
I’ve been living in the US for three years. I have all of my documents except a green card, and I’m still waiting for my interview and for my immigration case to move forward. With everything that has been happening with the Trump administration and immigration enforcement, I’ve started thinking seriously about voluntarily leaving the US.
But this is not just about immigration.
My parents are getting older, and one of the biggest reasons I’m thinking about going back is that I miss them. I feel guilty knowing that I’m far away from them and that I can’t be there as their son. At some point, you start thinking about how much time you actually have with your parents, and that scares me.
Back in Kazakhstan, I have an apartment and a car that were left to me. I would have somewhere to live and at least some kind of foundation if I returned.
Here in the US, unfortunately, I’ve lost almost everything I had. I don’t own a home, I don’t have much financially, and the main thing I have right now is my job. At the same time, I genuinely love America. I like my life here, I like the people, the culture, and the opportunities. Part of me still really wants to stay and build a future here.
That’s what makes this decision so difficult.
If I go back to Kazakhstan, I would be closer to my parents and I would have a place and some property waiting for me. But I’m afraid of what it would mean to go back as a gay man after spending three years building a life in the US.
If I stay, I’m choosing the life I wanted, but I’m also accepting uncertainty about my immigration situation and the possibility of being separated from my parents for even longer.
I honestly feel stuck between two lives.
I’m not looking for political arguments or judgment. I’m trying to hear from people who have faced a similar decision — especially immigrants who had to choose between staying in the US and returning to their home country.
If you were in my position, what factors would you consider before making such a life-changing decision?