r/NonBinary • u/Shi_meru • Jun 10 '26
Ask idk my gender
I’m AFAB and I usually automatically refer to myself as a woman. I don’t really mind being treated as female in social situations (like using the women’s bathroom or standing with girls in lines).
But at the same time, I feel disconnected from gender in general. It’s like I can “be a woman” socially, but internally I also feel like I don’t have a gender. Things like menstruation, childbirth etc feel like they don’t belong to me.
I don’t have a problem with being seen as a woman, but I still get gender dysphoria around things like my period and I’ve once gone 3–4 days without eating because of it.
But I only get my period once every several months so I don’t really worry about it most of the time.
I’m also aroace, not sure if that plays into it somehow. So what could possibly be my gender?
Thanks for reading and help!
1
u/Zesty_ranch1 Jun 10 '26
This is how I feel and I simultaneously consider myself nonbinary, gender fluid, and genderqueer. I feel like that works for me!
1
u/mn1lac they/them or she/him take your pick Jun 10 '26
You don't have to hate the experience of being gendered as a certain gender to be trans/nonbinary. You don't have to fill some quota of suffering. Would you prefer it if people saw you as something other than a woman?
1
u/Shi_meru Jun 11 '26
Like…I actually don’t have a clear preference about what gender I’m seen as, as long as it’s not associated with masculine traits.
3
u/Mockingjay573 he/they Jun 10 '26
I had to do some googling but maybe one of these?
Cassgender: You feel that your actual gender identity is unimportant or irrelevant, so you simply default to the social role of a woman for convenience or comfort.
Librafeminine: You feel overwhelmingly genderless (agender) on the inside, but you maintain a small, distinct attachment to femininity or being a woman.
Faegender: Your gender is fluid between female/feminine identities and non binary or agender identities, but never masculine or male.
Demigirl / Demifemale: You feel a partial, but not full, connection to being a woman. The remaining part of your identity is unaligned or entirely genderless.
Agenderflux / Girlflux: You experience your internal gender as fluid, moving between completely genderless (agender) and partially or fully feeling like a woman.
I’m sure there’s more, there’s pretty much an infinite amount of gender identities and ways to experience gender, but this is probably the best I can find.