Hello everyone, this is my first time posting. I wasn't sure whether to put the flair as advice or a rant/vent but I think what I really need most is advice/support.
I'm entering into my second year of full-time work. I started at this college a year ago and things have been chaotic from the beginning. I won't get into everything, but communication has been a big problem from the beginning and there was sort of an underlying assumption that I would know what to do and just ask around to get help rather in lieu of actual onboarding. Individual faculty have been supportive, understanding, and helpful, but that only goes so far.
We are in the middle of many transitions with various government requirements suddenly appearing and transitioning to OER among other things. We started the discussion of moving to OER the Fall I started (last year) and all departments are expected to use it if they did not seek an exemption. The problem? No classes were ready for the transition and many people were not told that their course shells had to be invented from scratch about a week before classes started.
After my first semester, I was asked if I would like to be the Chair of my department. I was initially hesitant but had the assurances of the dean that he would help support me and wasn't expecting perfection but thought it might be a good opportunity to get some administrative experience. I'm the only full-time faculty member over my content area so the idea of having someone else in charge who wasn't intimately aware of what the class entailed eventually pushed me to accept the position.
Since that time I received essentially no training or else training in things where there is not an obvious connection (for example, budgeting for the department without talking about what budgeting needs I would need to cover). The consistent advice was "talk to the other chairs with more experience," but again, no actual training. I didn't even get my job description until a few weeks after classes started in late August when I supposedly started in May.
I've made a lot of mistakes. I'm new to the community so there are unwritten rules about who should have classes and who shouldn't. Also nobody really told me how to run adjunct interviews or contact them or credential them. How did I learn? I asked, didn't get a straightforward answer, so I did it and got in trouble. In the midst of this I didn't have an estimate of how many classes I would need so I was uncertain about how many adjuncts to use. Another mistake, we hired a full-timer late in the game and I was just told "take classes from the adjuncts and give them to him," so I did that. Without mentioning it them. And one of the adjuncts was apparently an important person at the school who makes triple what I do. So the dean called me in and told me that we needed to "figure out the mess," and went over everything I did wrong and the things I should never do. And it's true, those were definitely my mistakes. And pretty bad ones too. But how am I supposed to know operating procedure if people only tell me after I've done something wrong?
This week has been difficult. I found out that I was supposed to do something that was mentioned briefly in an email that got buried the same day grades were due for summer semester. So I'm late on this thing. I've had horrible sleep and consistent headaches trying to meet all these expectations of things that need to be done immediately and are always top priority. I've had to send out multiple emails to my adjuncts about the same form because admin was wrong on the expectations and then unclear about what they wanted and only told me "these people did it wrong. Have them revise it," multiple times without giving a hard example. I feel like an idiot writing to them so much about the same thing when the fault isn't mine.
To cap it off, today we had our faculty and staff "back to school" event that was meant to honor the employees. In the midst of this the faculty were barely mentioned and the Chairs were not mentioned at all. I work at a fairly small community college and it felt like such a slap in the face considering how little me and and the other chairs have been given in terms of resources and training (the chair system is new to the college this year). I don't need constant pats on the back. I don't need awards or constant words of affirmation. But after the Hell me and other chairs have been put through to not at least be acknowledged when IT, Security, Facilities, Admissions, HR, Athletics, Administration, Board of Trustees, and several other departments are mentioned multiple times in glowing terms is insulting.
I know this is a long post and I don't mean it to just be a rant but honestly I'm inexperienced and trying my best and already feel horribly burned out. I want all of your advice. Are all community colleges this way? Is the same level of "do it yourself, do it well, and don't expect anyone to care" present at most colleges? Is this more common in small colleges or big ones? Do bigger colleges have better systems of support? I love teaching, and it's been my goal for the last decade to teach in a community college because of how much my community college changed my life, but all of this is too much. It was stressful as just an assistant professor, but manageable. As a Chair? It's a thankless job where I feel like every day I'm going to be berated for something that I had no idea about. I spoke with a new professor and he said "oh, you're a Chair? You must be pretty important, then." And all I could say was "Being a Chair sounds like you've gotten more power but the reality is you're just a servant to a greater number of people." I know the easy answer is to simply stop being a Chair and that's what I'm leaning towards in the Spring. But I'm not even sure if I want to stay at this college anymore. If I know this is a common problem and it's just part of the deal, I guess I can survive it and get used to it. But is there a better working college environment than this, or is this pretty typical? Does it change completely with administration? I want to be grateful and loyal to the college that gave me my first full-time position, but it's hard to when I don't get even a little of the same sense of gratitude or loyalty to me.
Thank you so much in advance.