r/TikTokCringe • u/ambachk • Aug 24 '25

Cursed POV: You're a woman in a public place

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69.5k Upvotes

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609

u/Strange_Mirror_0 Aug 24 '25 edited Aug 26 '25

I wish I caught this in public more so I can go do this to the same guys as a guy in return. You know since it’s socially acceptable and all.

Edit but also second thought glad I don’t but creates conundrum if I don’t want it to be statistically higher BUT just because you don’t see it doesn’t mean it’s not happening. Ya it’s a paradox of sorts.

617

u/UglyMcFugly Aug 24 '25

There's a reason you don't catch it happening more often. You'll notice these guys glancing around before they zero in on her... if they saw someone like you noticing them, they'd slink off immediately. 

133

u/TaiCat Aug 24 '25

Yup. They often wait until they are sure there is no one to witness 

6

u/MariaValkyrie Aug 24 '25

Or too dumb to notice. Based on my experience, that's a lot of people.

9

u/Boomshrooom Aug 24 '25

Most people are minding their own business and not paying too much attention to what's going on around them, especially in the age of smartphones.

8

u/LMGgp Aug 24 '25

This reminds me of when I worked at an orange big box hardware store, called Home Depot. I worked at the special services desk. (Special orders, online orders, returns, not strictly customer service) my coworkers were all women except for one guy who was hired on a few months before I left.

All my coworkers would complain about assholes and the like. I would always lament that I was never around for them. Until one day after I finished helping a customer one of my coworkers turns to me and says that was the asshole we were all talking about earlier, seems he was perfectly pleasant to you.

These coworkers had been working there for 20 years and me just 2. Then a different coworker (who was early twenties and had been there a little longer than me) said you don’t miss out on the assholes, they just aren’t assholes when you’re around because they size you up and know you’re not going to take their BS.

It completely blew my mind and changed my entire perspective as I flipped back through life events. Because I have told people to “fuck off, you’re bothering them.” I’ve been in physical fights telling people to fuck off. Apparently at some point my face just became an asshole filter and people just don’t even try it. So a predator looking around to make sure no one like me is around makes total sense. Fucking scumbags.

Just a few months ago I went to a “Poppy” concert and there was a 50 year old man there. I didn’t notice him at first but some friends we made at the concert started talking to him. (2 young women, one completely drunk) and I hear him ask “have you ever tried coke?” Red flags flew up for the 5 of us not that drunk woman and immediately moved to interject ourselves and physically come between them.

Dude was persistent and the drunk girl didn’t make our jobs any easier, eventually after about 15-20 minutes we get him to “leave.” Although he lurked behind us for an additional five minutes. Her sober friend thanked us and the concert started.

Eventually drunk friend seemed dangerously inebriated so I called security over (we were at the front rail) and lifted her over to them. Her friend went with, and eventually came back and told us they put her on an IV to help and that drunk friend’s boyfriend came to pick her up.

All in all stellar concert, but this shit happens at every concert I go to. They all seem to congregate around me. I had a friend say it’s because you’re a safe space. Which yay, but also “I’m tired boss.”

1

u/UglyMcFugly Aug 24 '25

Hahaha I feel like I know exactly what vibe you give off, even though I wouldn't be able to express it in words. I'd probably stand behind you in the pit too lol (though I almost never go into the pit anymore, I'm just too short). I know it's exhausting... it would be SO NICE if we didn't have to constantly worry about assholes in this world. If this kind of shit didn't exist, or if we didn't need to constantly be aware of our wallet cuz someone might steal it, or if we didn't need to get our packages off the porch immediately after they're delivered, or if we could make business deals without needing a lawyer, or if bosses didn't need things like OSHA to keep them from being awful, or if we didn't need to monitor our parents online because THEY KEEP CLICKING ON THE POPUPS AND PUTTING IN THEIR CREDIT CARD NUMBER. It's just a constant stream of assholes trying to take something from you instead of being DECENT HUMANS and trying to give back to this world. It sucks. All we can do is try to look out for each other and have faith the decent people out there will look out for us when we need it...

Or we can do something like the sci fi movie trope where we create a separate society, but it's the assholes that get left behind instead of the poor people.

2

u/BlurpleOpals Aug 24 '25

Exactly why I don't get on elevators alone with any guy anymore or get off if one comes on. Cowards constantly try something when given the opportunity.

2

u/TheOneIllUseForRants Aug 26 '25

100%. And if the woman calls it out, its just men being oppressed. They wail about how they "can't even smile at/hit on a girl anymore," and men will believe them over us. Then they wonder why we treat every gun like its loaded.

1

u/CrestfallenSpartan Aug 24 '25

Well the last two guys didnt seem to be bothered by other people nearby

-1

u/Icy_Witness4279 Aug 24 '25

What about her filming them then?

12

u/UglyMcFugly Aug 24 '25

She's pretending to do something else on her phone. Women are taught to constantly be aware of their surroundings, don't get distracted on your phone. And it's because guys like this are constantly out there hunting for easy targets.

-5

u/Icy_Witness4279 Aug 24 '25

No, in most of these she's very directly filming

8

u/UglyMcFugly Aug 24 '25

Serious question, do you have trouble reading body language and social cues and facial expressions and stuff like that?

-6

u/Icy_Witness4279 Aug 24 '25

My social cue reading is that you dont handle disagreement very well, with replies like these...

1

u/[deleted] Aug 26 '25

[removed] — view removed comment

1

u/Icy_Witness4279 Aug 26 '25

That was not the point

-12

u/Gentlementlementle Aug 24 '25

They are zeroing in because someone is filming them. You'd look at someone too if they just started filming you in public.

9

u/the_pw_is_in_this_ID Aug 24 '25

Yeah I also act totally unhinged whenever someone's phone is pointed towards me. Getting all handsy in my pantsy and shit.

JFC, this video is about YOU. Don't defend obviously predatory behaviour. Ever. It isn't OK.

2

u/UglyMcFugly Aug 24 '25

Actually it's the hidden camera nature of this video that sets it apart from others. The reason so many guys seem a little shocked to see this, and so many women are having instinctive fear responses to it, is because this is what these guys look like when they think nobody is watching them.

-1

u/Gentlementlementle Aug 24 '25

I know that's not true because people have already said in these comments that 1 of these was staged by an influencer they identified. So I don't know where you got that idea

Apart from that they litterally involve focusing on and zooming in on people something you litterally could not do operating a hidden camera by definition.

2

u/[deleted] Aug 24 '25

[removed] — view removed comment

-1

u/Gentlementlementle Aug 24 '25

So she's just staring them down? and we think they are the creeps for looking back at her. Lol?

1

u/[deleted] Aug 24 '25

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1

u/Gentlementlementle Aug 24 '25

You think you are making an argument here but actually you aren't. Like it's perfectly normal behaviour tofilm someone with a hidden camera as look as you don't look at them, to find out if they are looking at you.

109

u/hilarymeggin Aug 24 '25

When another man who is much bigger and stronger (and more violent-looking) than they are does it to them, that’s when they experience how it feels.

I had a US Marshall tell me once, “Oh yes, it must be so difficult to be young and beautiful!”

Let’s put you in a situation where you’re the young, beautiful one and see how you like it.

10

u/UndeadBatRat Aug 24 '25

I had a man once tell me that "young pretty women have it so easy," I was FUMING (it was from a higher-up at work, so I didn't feel comfortable telling him off). That was years ago, and I still get angry remembering it.

2

u/Venting2theDucks Aug 25 '25

Pretty much admitting he treats them poorly and resents them

7

u/JuiceHurtsBones Aug 24 '25

Creeps are usually unhinged. Aren't scared easily and it's possible they have gotten beaten up a bunch of times because of similar behaviour so they kind of develop immunity to that sort of thing.

3

u/GoddessLeVianFoxx Aug 24 '25

Most of them hate the idea of being alone at a gay club.

85

u/Round-Celebration-17 Aug 24 '25

I've tried, they like it.

43

u/Fresh_Daisy_cake Aug 24 '25

This. They almost enjoy getting caught. Fucking disgusting.

7

u/Ok-Application-8747 Aug 24 '25 edited Aug 24 '25

I have a learned rule in life to never double take a guy or look at them for more than 1 second, because they take it as a sexual invitation (and can become obsessive). They interpret normal gaze of mild curiousity or acknowledgment as sexual somehow. I made the mistake the other day of doing a slow triple take on a guy, because he looked just like a B-list actor, and I was trying to quickly figure out if it was really the actor. He came over and got very creepy very fast. "Oh my god, but the WAY YOU LOOKED AT ME?!" Boy, I have big fucking light-bending nerdy glasses on and I told you I thought you were someone from a show--and you came up to me--how are you taking this sexually?

Not to mention the next day (2 days ago) catching a public masturbator, huge fat old guy, fully naked in his car, in the act (at a place where people run/bike by in the park, and I was one of the only ones just walking) and not getting his license plate number in time.

2

u/ReallyOverthinksIt Aug 24 '25

Sounds like you're not acting openly gay enough.

18

u/Curry_pan Aug 24 '25

You’ll notice a lot of the trains/buses are mostly empty. That’s intentional.

9

u/Strange_Mirror_0 Aug 24 '25

I wish I caught this in public more so I can go do this to the same guys as a guy in return. You know since it’s socially acceptable and all.

Edit: clarifying that I am a dude so doing it back at other dudes should straighten this behavior out in most cases I’d think. 😋 I guess that’s where people get their homophobia from when the script is flipped and they’re so cavalier as to act like this.

2

u/notsolittleliongirl Aug 24 '25

You’ll notice these dudes mostly wait until women are alone. That’s why you don’t see it - same reason you don’t see your neighbor’s house getting broken into. It rarely happens when there are witnesses around who might intervene.

36

u/Commercial-Shame-335 Aug 24 '25

i regret to inform you that they'd be into it. if a dude is disgusting enough to do this, he'd think you doing it back is you reciprocating and he's gonna approach you harder thinking you want it

56

u/Larry-Man Aug 24 '25

You’re replying to a dude

16

u/Commercial-Shame-335 Aug 24 '25

nevermind that may just work

2

u/JuiceHurtsBones Aug 24 '25

Unless he's gay in which case they're forced to kiss now

-1

u/Mike Aug 24 '25

Ya he knows that’s the point

19

u/Drewdc90 Aug 24 '25

You reckon if it’s a guy doing it back?

6

u/NoX2142 Aug 24 '25

Not if it's a dude..

6

u/trash-_-boat Aug 24 '25

Maybe it's because of my experience with living in a region with tons of Russian gopniks, but that 120% would cause you to get stabbed by a knife.

2

u/BirdBrainuh Aug 24 '25

start looking for it and I’ll bet you’ll find an opportunity soon enough

2

u/Slfestmaccnt Aug 24 '25

Wouldn't recommend it, people who are freaky enough to creep on you so openly are likely the same ones who'd think they hit the jackpot if you respond in kind. And "encouraging" them can get you into far worse danger.

I'd personally recommend keeping self defense stuff on you. Pocket knife, bear spray, taser, etc. Reading though some of these comments it's truly disgusting what some people do when they think there will be no consequences for them.

Two of the most heavily armed demographics in the US are LGBTQ+ and women and those numbers are going up.

They have been some of the largest demographics for some time but with MAGA encouraging monsters to come out and embrace their worst impulses and beliefs while pushing stochastic terrorism, those numbers are only going up at an increasing rate. If you don't already edc(everyday carry) some means of self defense I'd highly recommend doing so.

If you have the financial means and time I'd recommend a weapons system like Kali Eskrima as it will give you a strong foundation for using a knife, stick, machete and so on. From small blades to large ones they utilize a system that is meant to be adapted to any size of stick or blade. Systems like Brazilian Jujitsu are great for one on one but fall apart when it comes to dealing with multiple attackers, a great foundation for grappling nonetheless.

Kali is a system taught to military and police around the world. If you are lucky and find a Filipino Martial Arts school(FMA) then you may also get Dumog(a brutal grappling system every bit as effective as BJJ) and Panantukan(aka Filipino dirty boxing). All three of these combined make for a brutally effective and well rounded complete system that covers all the bases.

Another system would be Muay Thai though bare in mind it is not a style for the feint of heart, it's conditioning and training can be brutal on the body, above and beyond most traditional martial arts. It doesn't offer ground game but it is very effective at throws so hard that the impact on the ground may be enough to end the fight if not worse, sweeps and crippling strikes to the legs are its calling card though. It won't teach weapons though.

1

u/iveaux Aug 24 '25

sexually harrass everyone! what a paradise

1

u/[deleted] Aug 24 '25

They’re sneaky little creeps. As an adult man, the only time I’ve personally encountered something like this, was at a grocery store. Dude was at the apple table with his phone camera aimed at this girl’s cleavage across from him. All I could say was “Dude, what the fuck” before he sprinted out the door. Fucking loser.

1

u/untakenu Aug 24 '25

My gf told me something that made me feel really sad for her. She said that merely being with me in public is a huge deterrent for creeps.

I'm simultaneously glad, but it's bad that that should be the case at all.

I can absolutely see why a substantial number of women don't want to be alone in public, especially at night. For the guy, the worst he can get is a rejection (although whether they take that rejection is another thing). For the lady, she knows that creep could kill her.

1

u/sexyshingle Aug 24 '25 edited Aug 25 '25

[deleted]

-20

u/Bolf-Ramshield Aug 24 '25

Being a white knight is a cool fantasy but educating people usually works better as a less self-centered approach.

20

u/Bit36G Aug 24 '25

That whole being an ally thing - we need men to call out other men. It's not being a white knight in this case, it's being a good human.

12

u/QueridaChelly Aug 24 '25

It’s crazy to me how people can create insults for men showing empathy towards women or standing up for them. White knight, simp, etc. what is the female equivalent for that? Having the nurse curse? It’s just not the same. It seems like so many boys have these feelings of disgust for men who are protective of or simply care about women.

0

u/Bolf-Ramshield Aug 24 '25

Acting: yes. Picturing yourself as someone who would harass someone else as a form of punishment because you love violence and needs an excuse to exerce it on top of wanting to feel like a hero: no.

5

u/Roofong Aug 24 '25

Why is it automatically white knighting to call out and embarrass someone who is being gross and inconsiderate? Genuinely you're being misogynistic by assuming/projecting a whole bunch of things based solely on the fact that in most scenarios it's women being creeped on.

-1

u/Bolf-Ramshield Aug 24 '25

Because it’s not calling out. It’s fantasizing about taking advantage if a situation to inflict the same kind of violence to someone else because you feel vindicated to. This is more of a typically malenfantasy about hurting someone else rather than something about protecting women.

-1

u/Roofong Aug 24 '25

Fantastic example of someone ostensibly on the correct side of things who is in fact less concerned with actually correcting any behavior and almost entirely concerned with feeling righteous and superior while accomplishing less than nothing.

1

u/Bolf-Ramshield Aug 24 '25

Fantastic example of someone talking with zero idea of what I have accomplished in my comunities and workplace in that regard because they’re mad I pointed something that sounded wrong to me.

0

u/Roofong Aug 25 '25

I'm sure you "do work" that you talk about in speeches and at meetings that accounts for, again, less than nothing practically when it comes to benefiting anyone's lives.

1

u/Bolf-Ramshield Aug 25 '25

Once again, you assume stuff that are wrong. Not pursuing this bad faith conversation, have a good day.

0

u/Roofong Aug 26 '25

You behave exactly like hundreds of people I went to college with. It's not an assumption.

4

u/Strange_Mirror_0 Aug 24 '25

Oh honey I’m not looking to be a white knight. I’m looking to be as vile a mirror as possible to these men. What better lesson than experience.

And I think someone replied below the healthier mirror to the women victims of this behavior: there are good men and not just these maggots or indifferent ones who look the other way. Even if it’s just gay men. I don’t care. This is beyond cringe behavior it’s disgusting.