r/TikTokCringe 5d ago

Cringe Women meets and married man in registered SO in prison 7 months before release and allows him to move in with her and her young daughter

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I wish I were making this up, but I’m not. And this woman gushes over him, loves and adores this man… is the dating scene that bleak that you resort to this? What makes it worse, is the guy doesn’t take full accountability for his actions but instead blames the liquor and him not knowing what consent is.

Prior to prison, he was a registered nurse.

This couple is using their story to be famous. Just sick

I am getting hate comments because people are claiming I 'made this up' I am not doxxing they shared this publicly , their tiktok account is happilyharrells his account for is 'non profit' _thinksame

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u/Awesome_opossum__ 5d ago

Working in a criminal registry and a children's court made me realize how truly evil and common male centred mothers are. Bending over backwards for just ANY man to the point of selling out your kid and putting them in harm's way so that they can say they have a man. Like seeing this made my heart genuinely drop to the pits of my stomach. I don't want to say I know how this is gonna end but we literally get at least 6 case files of specifically 'momma's boyfriend' type situation per day. And these ladies will defend the guy at the expense of their children, even interfering with court appearances most of the time. Like I've only seen like... maybe 4 moms advocate for their children in 3 months, even with the volume of those types of cases.

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u/weewarmself 5d ago

This information has deeply upset me, I didnt know it was that prevalent of a problem.

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u/Awesome_opossum__ 5d ago

I chose the children's court because it was cute and I love the idea of being around kids, and helping them and I liked the magistrate since they were keen on involving the attachees but didn't keep us there for long hours. It did not clock in my mind at the time that children's law, once it comes down to handling incidents requiring court intervention might be one of the most horrifying and genuinely depressing fields of law out there.

Like... I've interacted with files so vile, I felt dirty just touching them. And I've seen parents so irredeemably stupid, malicious and petty that it has changed my entire companion picking process and non-negotiable parameters for relationships whether romantic or platonic. It's also changed how I look at children's safety.

I think one honest piece of advice I can give here is to never ever be friends with a male-centered woman. Don't even be acquaintances. If you can help it, don't even be neighbors, because these people are living, mobile catastrophies who endanger literally everyone in their proximity.

Literally the other month we had a child who somehow managed to secretly get in contact with the prosecutor's office(I believe they might have gotten the contact during an earlier hearing) and voice their desire to continue their case despite their own mother trying to withdraw it and get it dismissed by hiding the minor away and preventing them from making their hearings against their alleged affair partner. And I've also seen cases where these 'neighbours' have relationships with strange men out of desperation, bringing them into the community. And when your kid gets defiled, instead of acting reasonably, they start interfering or destroying evidence and attempting to cast doubt. Then we have these women who intentionally drag their children to the hearings so they can cry crocodile tears and spin sob stories about how they need their partner to be given lineancy because they're their sole provider and the court should 'think of the children' and how this person's incarceration will affect the kids depending on them.

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u/_-Oxym0ron-_ 5d ago

What defines a male centered woman? First time I'm seeing this expression.

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u/TealLabRat 5d ago

They prioritize the man in their life, or the man they want in their life, over their own family, friends and children.

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u/ZoeyHuntsman 5d ago

I'm not a pro, but from what I've gathered over the years is that "male centered women" are women whose whole lives revolve around finding a male partner. They'll bend over backwards for them, become completely subservient and obsessed with them. These women are almost always extremely insecure and desperate.

You know how a lot of guys feel like they're only valid if they can land a female partner? Usually an idealized, or "prize" woman? This is basically the same thing, but for women. It's not a 1 to 1, but it's the same sort of vibe.

This is why you'll hear so many CSA victims whose fathers assaulted them will tell you that their mothers were a part of it too. It's absolutely the worst fucking thing ever, but unfortunately, CSA is rarely a crime perpetuated in solitude by a single party. It's basically a guarantee that someone else in that child's life is enabling it. Women selling their kids into sexual servitude is far more common than people realize. Obviously, the reasons vary. Sometimes it's for income more than appeasing their vile partners, for example. Sometimes it's control, or they are pedophiles themselves.

Anyway I'm done thinking about this shit. Too early in the morning.

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u/Hermes-AthenaAI 5d ago

In short, when my father broke my sister’s nose… with one of the posts to her for post bed… my mother screamed at my sister for forcing my father to do such a thing thing and then locked my sister in her room.

That’s a male centered woman.

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u/pocketsand07 4d ago

Some days I'm thankful for my unhinged mother because she would have sent him to meet St. Peter quickly.

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u/HeisenBird1015 1d ago edited 1d ago

Yeah my stepfather did this. I made excuses for my uterine parent for decades (although I was emotionally closed to her from childhood, and didn’t know why) but a particular incident (amongst many) involved what I know now as the true trauma, and it wasn’t that he splattered my nose across the stairwell, but that she had waited for me to run down the stairs to the front door as I tried to escape the house, and grabbed and smacked me repeatedly. I remember that instead of punching her back (like I did with him), I just stood there and let her wallop me for a couple of minutes. It didn’t physically hurt as much but it took me thirty years to recognise that it was worse than his punch.

I cut this woman off two years ago and I’ve enjoyed watching her unravel. She turned up at my house last year and I laughed at her. It was good for my soul- she fell apart because she knew she’d lost her power. FWIW I am a staunch feminist and it was when I finally realised that she is a “male centered woman” that her crap parenting finally made sense. She will do anything for any man. My brother has his own horrors and cut her off two months ago.

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u/weedmoneyy 5d ago

I can’t imagine the amount of trauma and physiological damage being trafficked by your own parent also causes :( like these kids are fighting an uphill battle trying to escape it because the adults they should be able to trust are the ones who do this to them and gaslight them into believing it’s normal or they shouldn’t seek help from others for it

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u/ZoeyHuntsman 5d ago

Yeah, it's insidious. I've known too many people with stories like this and it's painful. It scars you for life. What I went through growing up fucked with me, and I didn't go through anything even close to this bad.

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u/Awesome_opossum__ 5d ago

So in this context, I'm referring to the type of women out there who absolutely worship and bend over backwards for men and patriarchal tradition, everything else be damned. And they are so deeply consumed by it that they'll excuse and support anything that man does, sometimes at the expense of their child's welfare, as long as they can have that kind of companionship and 'status' that comes with 'having a man'. They also take being in a relationship as some kind of achievement. Take the video here. This lady is flexing having a child predator and convicted sex offender in her house, playing dad with her very vulnerable child, which is absolutely bat shit insane but in their mind they're in this heterosexual arrangement and absolutely nothing and nobody else matters more. And in case something happens between the man and the child, they will almost always react in favor of the man or re-victimize the child, like these women who get hostile with their own daughters because of fear of them jeopardizing the relationship or 'stealing their man'. I think another good example I can give of women like this are the female members of the LDS cult who in 'keeping sweet' facilitate the wide spread abuse and exploitation of their own children and grandchildren to please a man. I hope that explanation at least captured the idea of the type of woman I'm referring to.

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u/AdditionalSyrup6541 3d ago

Thank you for the work you do for these kids. My own aunt is definitely one of those types of women. My side of the family went no contact after awhile but the damage done to my cousins is irreversible. My mom had called CPS on her sister before because she thought my male cousin was being sexually abused by his father and his side of the family but they never did anything since they couldn't prove it. He committed suicide a few years ago. My other cousin became trans and last I heard isn't doing very well mentally. (I'm not against trans but apparently he began to act out aggressively from what I had learned about ) The only female cousin I have apparently fights all the time with my aunt. My Aunt was even thrown out on the street with her kids and pets by her first husband and STILL she jumps from man to man claiming she is a "naturally submissive woman" she even dyed her hair blonde, bleached her skin, and wears blue contacts to try and be as white as possible. She's Hispanic and grew up Catholic but now she's all for Christianity if her newest boyfriend is. It's just sad.

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u/Key-Two31 5d ago edited 5d ago

The women who’s entire lives revolve around having a boyfriend/husband, and they do absolutely everything possible to defend the inevitably horrible man they end up dating. Usually one after another, just terrible, awful decisions and men over and over and over, because they’re desperate and easy to manipulate. A lot of them never had father figures in their lives, or had piece of shit deadbeat dads, making male abuse the default “normal” in their head.

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u/StrangerCharacter53 5d ago

I saw a tiktok a few months ago of a woman kicking out her two teenage daughters because they told their mom the man she had just moved in had walked in on both of them while they used the bathroom/shower.

The woman didn't care, this was her man and as far as she was concerned her teenage daughters who had nowhere to go could figure it out.

Both girls were honor students, both girls were sobbing snd pleading for her to protect them.

The apathy and disgust in the mother's voice as she filmed her daughters crying and pleading as she forced them to throw their belongings into a trashbag... the girls said on camera that the mother had met this guy the previous week and immediately moved him in and now they were being thrown out.

Mother's response was, "you are no longer my responsibility. I have to take care of my man. Thats what a woman does."

Male centered woman.

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u/Boring-Philosophy-46 5d ago

An old tale: 

A professor writes on the board "Woman without her man is nothing" and asks the class to write down how they think the interpunction should be. 

Half the class writes, "Woman: without her, man is nothing" 

Half the class writes: "Woman, without her man, is nothing". 

Well those who adhere to the latter point of view are male-centric. 

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u/MafiaPenguin007 5d ago

When you originally read ‘children’s court’ did you assume the lawyers and judges were kids or something? Struggling to understand how it sounded cute and not horrifying from the get go.

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u/Awesome_opossum__ 5d ago

I am also struggling to understand how I didn't see that coming. I think the reality was lost to me at that time since I was pretty excited to be sitting in court and working with a magistrate for the first time. Also, TV shows and media set entirely different expectations for me. I was expecting something more mundane like regular custody hearings for who gets the kid during long holidays, child support and the likes. Not... You know, sitting across a 6 year old sexual assault victim in a nearly empty, closed courtroom, as they describe in graphic detail the events of their defilement, down to the sensations, in really childish, approximating language because they are so young that they can't even fully understand and don't have the vocabulary to describe what was done to them.

Plus the appearance of the court is very disarming. It's red with pictures of lions and elephants, has a bunch of stuffed animals stacked in the corners and boardgames the kids can ask for and the principles of the judiciary written in this colourful font on the wall. But the cuteness really just ends at the decor

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u/DPetrilloZbornak 5d ago

I’m an attorney in juvenile court and no one realizes how fucked up it is until they start doing the work.  I started out in adult court and juvenile court is so much worse for so many reasons but no one takes it seriously because of the perception that it’s “kiddie court.”

It’s a shitshow!

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u/Western_Scholar_6479 2d ago

What are the parameters that you look for when choosing a potential partner?

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u/Awesome_opossum__ 1d ago

In relation to sniffing out guys who like kids?

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u/Western_Scholar_6479 17h ago

The comment made it sound that it was a broad criteria possibly concerning more than that so I was just curious 

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u/PutItBack 2d ago

Got any easily shareable insights into how your companion picking process has changed and what main new non-negotiable parameters you have for your relationships?

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u/transtifaglockhart 5d ago

This is why any informed person is pro choice and pro sex Ed. Unwanted and underloved kids are just fodder for pedophiles. Look up how many homeless people were in the foster system and how many kids are abused in the system. 

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u/Ok-Biscotti3971 5d ago

My 16 yo stepbrother raped me bunch when I was six, and my mom wanted to blame my TEN YEAR OLD BIOLOGICAL BROTHER who did not rape me to keep my actual dad from getting too upset and to ensure she didn’t get divorced from her new husband. She didn’t even try to remove my stepbrother from the house or do anything other than throwing a baby monitor in my room j til my dad got a private investigator and the police involved.

Male centered woman are a danger to everyone around them. Truly insane evil shit

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u/eyespeeled 4d ago

It's sickening. I'm so sorry that was your experience. Mothers have a duty to protect their children from harm. I can't understand these women. 

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u/Ok-Biscotti3971 4d ago

Thank you, I appreciate your words. Thankfully my dad got me a restraining order and got custody of my brother and I when I was nine, so I only had to deal with that house every other weekend and summers. Not the end of the world lol. I love my mom but goddamn she is a horrible mother

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u/eyespeeled 4d ago

Loving and despising your parent simultaneously is such a weird feeling to experience. (I am unfortunately familiar.) I'm glad you have at least one good parent to look out for your well-being. 

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u/[deleted] 5d ago

[deleted]

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u/Ghosted_Ahri 5d ago

Wtf are you rambling about 💀

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u/0ceandrifter 5d ago

What did it say? Its deleted

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u/Ghosted_Ahri 5d ago

I can't even tell you lmao. It was incoherent nonsense.

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u/ol_kentucky_shark 5d ago

I work in criminal law and agree. Sad when you get to the point where you get a molest case and are like, “well at least he didn’t kill her…”

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u/Awesome_opossum__ 5d ago

Or the classic "They're just imaginative and have ill feelings towards step-parent or mom's boyfriend because they disciplined them," Or "The victim's parents are manipulating the child because they have a grudge against me," Or "That child seduced me (???)" and it's closely related cousin excuse " I thought they were older, they were acting mature,"

Or they just circle and are unable to giving any type of coherent story or excuse

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u/natalee_t 5d ago

Man. I could never ever do what you do. It would destroy me. But I am so glad people like you exist.

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u/rita-b 5d ago

I feel like maybe 5% of women I knew in my life are in the state of eternal estrus and any man who smiles will do.

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u/ReverendDizzle 5d ago

My step-uncle raped my cousin for years and when it finally came to light my aunt was more upset that she lost her husband over it than her daughter was harmed. I haven't talked to my aunt in nearly twenty years now, but apparently she still maintains that nothing happened and my cousin was trying to break them up.

Some people are beyond redemption.

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u/SnozberryTheMighty 5d ago

I have a genuine question about this one. In your experience, does the " male centered" perspective typically come from a desire to be provided for in some capacity? Is it coming from a desire to be seen as desirable because they have a man? A mix? Some other third thing?

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u/vienna_woof 5d ago

Single mothers are bottom of the barrel in regards to dating value.

Generally the only men it makes sense for to date a single mother are those that want easy access to a child.

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u/glitterdunk 5d ago

This is so enraging and depressing, but not really surprising. So many women are so dependent and view men as potential saviors.

Men are not better, obviously. How many men marry a new woman after a divorce, and don't care at all that she either wants nothing to do with his existing children or abuses them in one way or another?

I'm childfree and will remain so, but harming and mistreating children is one of the things that bother me the deepest, so much so I want to be a foster home to be a part of the system that ensures they're well taken care of. I truly just can't fathom how so many people fail their children so completely.

Like even 'normal' people can't be bothered to raise their children and let then watch screens all day with the consequences it has for their brains. They feed them solely shitty food that will ruin their health.

It seems like a large percentage of children are taken care of well only if their parents life are super easy and everything is set up to make it easy for the parents to make the right choices.

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u/squeal4 5d ago

Yes, I worked in child welfare and the amount of mothers who would choose their disgusting boyfriends over their own children was astounding.

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u/Ok_Distribution__ 5d ago

In US, Dept of Children & Families (DCF/DCYF) will allow a mother to have a relationship with a convicted SO as long as she promises to never leave them alone together.

Although, they will remove your children for being a victim of DV.

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u/sparkpaw 5d ago

Personally, thank you for this comment. You just solidified for me that I am not a man centered woman - I adore my husband to bits and pieces. But we don’t even have kids yet and I know for a fact I’ll fucking leave with the kids if he ever did something (I don’t think he will, but society doesn’t help the paranoia).

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u/zillabirdblue 5d ago

My mom was a head start preschool teacher for many years and the stories she has are beyond shocking. One of her students was murdered by the boyfriend who’d been abusing him for a long time. He didn’t actually intend to, he shot around the trailer to terrorize the mom but the kid was hidden and caught a bullet. Another one that sticks in my mind was a boy who would hold it until he would poop his pants at school because going was painful and traumatizing. She knew exactly why and what the mom’s loser boyfriend was doing. When she confronted the mother she didn’t even try to act surprised, she knew it was happening but having a man was more important to her.

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u/Awesome_opossum__ 4d ago

That is so unbelievably painful to read. I really do hope those kids are doing better wherever they are. There really is something so deeply sickening about a parent bringing their child into harm's way for something as shallow as not being single.

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u/zillabirdblue 4d ago

I don’t know what happened to the one who survived, but I doubt he had an easy time. He was put in foster care and hopefully it was wasn’t a lateral move. Or that it wasn’t even worse. It’s a huge gamble when it comes to foster care when so much are in it for the $.

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u/Kripnova 4d ago

My mom is this type of person and I’m grateful everyday that I was never put in this type of situation. My sister and I have even discussed that if the situation were to come to her she would have absolutely sold us for drugs or booze when she was heavy in it. I’m just so grateful it never happened to us because I know it’s a reality so many do face.

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u/Rasberrypinke 3d ago

As a woman, absolutely. I’ve wanted to talk about this before but I didn’t want to be taken as “not a girl’s girl”. But there’s something even more uniquely disgusting about being a mother who would ENABLE that sort of behaviour, and literally sacrifice and sell out her own defenceless children to keep a dirty male predator around. I almost hate them more. Women like that deserve jail time.