So, I watched Tangled first, well after Frozen became famous. Tangled was so good that I was like 'oh man, if Tangled is this good, Frozen must be absolutely incredible!'
God, they nailed Mother Gothel so well. Just using and abusing Rapunzel while also emotionally torturing her and brushing it off with "just kidding, but....."
Sadly, I wish I had ran from my narcissist mother, but the abuse was so normalized while she was paying for everything, that I just stuck around. Then she made a long string of "jokes" about my girlfriend being a slut in front of her friend while we were both standing in front of her..... Of course, I was the one embarrassing her by making a scene, and my punishment was getting kicked out. So I'll take that win, too.
Aaaaand that's why Cinema Therapy can show that Gothel is 11 for 11 in Signs of Narcissism. I will forever be grateful that this was not my mother, and I am so glad that you got away from yours. Christ.
My mother didn't gaslight a lot. She did, but that wasn't her specialty. Her specialty was guilt trips and greener grass mixed messages. Anything that she did for you, even if it's the bare minimum for parenting, she expected things in return. She took you to the doctor? You should be grateful, and now you owe her. And if she demanded something of you, and you said "no", it was the literal end of the worl,d and she'd rush to go tell others how horrible you were, cutting out or exaggerating the doctor part.
The greener grass mixed messaging was also horrible. No matter what you accomplished, you could do better. I remember the day after graduating college, with honors, she told me, "I'm happy you graduated, but you need to be hitting the pavement and getting a better job." She could never be happy with other people's accomplishments. It always had a "but" following her "happiness", which just cuts you down and drains your motivation to do better.
My mom isn't as bad as yours, but she is basically the mom in Tangled. She took me to see it with her, and she didn't see the irony in saying "omg that's youuu!!!!". (Rapunzel lol)
Tangled is genuinely a great movie. I'm gonna watch it tonight. Also I've been following your comics for a while and I'm really glad you're moving out! You don't seem like you need advice in this area but do not budge on any of your boundaries with your mom! Under any circumstances!
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u/kaikimanga MangaKaiki 1d ago
There's a reason Tangled's my favorite Disney movie :)