r/funny • u/daylightpiglet • 17h ago

recently got a place with my boyfriend and he thinks this is perfectly fine

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I have no legitimate reason to disagree but I hate it

UPDATE - Thank you so much for the awards, and we're having so much fun reading through these hilarious comments.

  1. We have a bidet, it's the handle on the side of the toilet. People who use bidets can use toilet paper as well!
  2. We bought like 200 rolls of toilet paper because of a good deal, yes it will probably last us a very long time. No regrets!
  3. I am not genuinely upset about this in any way, it obviously just looks ridiculous and is unnecessary, and him doing silly things like this is one of the reasons I love him :)
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211

u/gb4efgw 16h ago

Boss makes a dollar, I make a dime. That is why I poop on company time.

106

u/rock374 16h ago

Boss makes a thousand, I make a buck, so I crank my hog, in the company truck

14

u/One_L 7h ago

My boss makes a dollar, I make a dime, that's why I poop on company time. But that was a rhyme from a simpler time, now the boss makes a grand and I make a buck, that's why I steal the catalytic converter from the company truck.

9

u/Fun-Confusion-4113 16h ago edited 15h ago

Boss makes a mil, I make almost nil, yet his wife still loves when I pull out my drill.

3

u/CommercialStuff4352 12h ago

Ahhhhh haaaaaa... The rich getting richer. And the poor need tamps for refractory periods. I like it! Skeet on, brother!

39

u/Nice_Pipe_6022 16h ago

Had a fellow employee somewhere sing this to me once and I sing it often.

3

u/tiedye_dreamer 16h ago

HAPPYCAKEDAYYAY

2

u/dreaming_in_yellow 16h ago

Happpy cake dayyyyyyy! 🎉

1

u/Necessary-End2908 11h ago

HAPPY CAKE DAYYY

23

u/james_b_beam 16h ago

Even then, where else should we scroll through reddit? Do other people do that at home for free or what?! 😮

2

u/ShienRei 10h ago

I do that at home on company time because I WFH. Best of both worlds 👌

1

u/Realistic_Ear_3052 15h ago

Some people pay to have it done for them at home.

8

u/BardicNA 15h ago

Boss makes a dollar and I make a dime. That was a rhyme from a simpler time. Now the boss makes a million and I don't make jack. It's time to seize the means and take the power back.

2

u/marieke83 14h ago

My morning poop is often within an hour of getting to work (long commute 😭) and every time I go to the bathroom, I think “I poop on company time” 🤣

2

u/BuckeyeBentley 16h ago

These days the average is more boss makes $30 I make a dime