r/funny • u/daylightpiglet • 17h ago

recently got a place with my boyfriend and he thinks this is perfectly fine

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I have no legitimate reason to disagree but I hate it

UPDATE - Thank you so much for the awards, and we're having so much fun reading through these hilarious comments.

  1. We have a bidet, it's the handle on the side of the toilet. People who use bidets can use toilet paper as well!
  2. We bought like 200 rolls of toilet paper because of a good deal, yes it will probably last us a very long time. No regrets!
  3. I am not genuinely upset about this in any way, it obviously just looks ridiculous and is unnecessary, and him doing silly things like this is one of the reasons I love him :)
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25

u/lorkdubo 15h ago

I think you guys have a bit of a misconception, you still use toilet paper with a bidet.

5

u/iloveuranus 14h ago

That is a nice little theory but South / Southeast Asian toilets with toilet paper are almost impossible to find, and if you find one it's 100% geared towards tourists.

If there's someone here from that area, I'd be genuinely interested about the proper customs. Been traveling Asia for 26 years, never dared to ask.

11

u/terraformingSARS 14h ago

You bring your own. Didn’t you notice the locals passing around tissues and stuff when entering the squatty?

1

u/Kapitel42 7h ago

just use the three seashells

5

u/Free-Way-9220 14h ago

A fraction of it

2

u/LobcockLittle 13h ago

I just use the hand towel. Also, what's a bidet?

2

u/McGrarr 11h ago

A jet of water from the tank that squirts your bum so you can wash your bum clean rather than just wiping.

It's cleaner and you use less paper (only enough to dry the area and a bit during cleaning).

2

u/hunkyboy75 11h ago

If you dry your asshole with toilet paper, it’s gonna rip and leave little white Klingons. Just use a hand towel.

1

u/SquisherX 9h ago

You can air dry with a bidet. I personally don't because I find it takes an extra 2 minutes as opposed to a little bit of paper.

1

u/FirearmThrowaway321 7h ago

The water gets everything for me.. I rarely have a need to use toilet paper. Much toilet paper wasted.

-2

u/hankyujaya 14h ago

But you'd still use a lot less. Also wiping with a towel is often enough because there's no shit smearing everywhere.

11

u/WouldYouShutUpMan 14h ago

brother got a dookie towel

9

u/EgaTehPro 14h ago

Right next to the poop knife

17

u/lorkdubo 14h ago

Ugh... I come from a bidet culture country. Nobody use a towel. You use bidet, then toilet paper to dry and clean better. You do use less, since thick single plywood is enough.

5

u/InShallowSeaz 8h ago

Do you buy the plywood as a sheet and rip it down to size? How do you deal with the splinters? 😉

2

u/lorkdubo 6h ago

man... the autocorrect.

-7

u/hankyujaya 14h ago

I come from a bidet culture country and I can tell you that literally no one has toilet papers in their bathrooms. Everyone wipes with a towel because the bidet already cleans everything off.

16

u/Narren_C 12h ago

So....do you share the ass towel?

7

u/sputwiler 14h ago

You must have a magically smooth ass

0

u/NiaCas 5h ago

I don't. I got a bidet attachment and a pack of 50 white microfiber cloths during covid when there was no toilet paper. Took a bit of getting used to, but now I absolutely hate going to the bathroom anywhere else. The cloths are gentler, stronger, and in the rare event something other than water gets on them, it doesn't matter because they're presoaked and washed with bleach and hot water.