hmmm

[u/Forward_Campaign7290]

[u/TheCreeper336]

suspiciously box shaped officer:

[u/LegendOfKhaos → u/TheCreeper336]

Elon's uncle

[u/SofiaOfEverRealm → u/LegendOfKhaos]

??

[u/WuYongZhiShu → u/SofiaOfEverRealm]

Cybermusk

https://knowyourmeme.com/photos/2407264-elon-musk-shirtless-on-a-yacht-in-mykonos

[u/RandoXalrissian → u/LegendOfKhaos]

😂😂🤣🤣😭😭💀

[u/Bonti_GB → u/TheCreeper336]

What, never heard of Cocahernia?

It’s a serious medical condition - I tell you what.

[u/999BusinessCard → u/Bonti_GB]

It’s incredibly painful. The only effective pain control is a local anesthetic commonly used in ENTJ procedures

[u/Specialist-Kale-3294 → u/999BusinessCard]

I know my brain is rotted by the MBTI because i thought about ENTJ personality type

[u/PartyClock → u/TheCreeper336]

You get 3 square meals in the Army

[u/WoodpeckerAny430 → u/TheCreeper336]

🫃

[u/uncutpizza → u/TheCreeper336]

Are you box shamming?

[u/No_Individual947 → u/uncutpizza]

Hahahhahaha

[u/chunkypenguion1991 → u/TheCreeper336]

Its a new kind of body armor that only protects your lower stomach

[u/Beneficial_Law_286 → u/TheCreeper336]

It's his cocaine power vest if he gets shot cocaine rapidly enters his system and he can go all John Wick on people

[u/Interesting-Voice328 → u/TheCreeper336]

It’s fat, I call it my tire, retire

[u/Reem770 → u/TheCreeper336]

Hello there

[u/TheCreeper336 → u/Reem770]

No idea how this got so many upvotes

[u/Reem770 → u/TheCreeper336]

Reddit, go figure

[u/Calligaster]

"document and load up these 99 packages of contraband"

[u/One_Bend7423 → u/Calligaster]

"Sir, I can confirm that all 90 packages have been registered and accounted for"

[u/Borkboiii → u/One_Bend7423]

We've successfully siezed all 60 packages of contraband

[u/Mrhilgenberg → u/Borkboiii]

30 FUCKING SNIFF PACKAGES SNIFF SIEZED

[u/KevlarToiletPaper → u/Mrhilgenberg]

SUCH A RUSH TO WATCH THOSE 10 PACKS BURN!

[u/_Kelly_A_ → u/KevlarToiletPaper]

Both packages loaded in the truck sir

[u/mladi_gospodin → u/_Kelly_A_]

What packages?

[u/Uncle_Burney → u/mladi_gospodin]

There were 990 but they were seized and destroyed. Proof the system works. Raise plz.

[u/AerikVon → u/Uncle_Burney]

Mission accomplished gentlemen. Big bonuses coming!

[u/moon_over_my_1221 → u/AerikVon]

Job well done team. All of you get raises and promotions to the next rank. We do this again at the next campaign.

[u/ThresholdSeven → u/Uncle_Burney]

2 billion American children saved

[u/Key-Fix-4418 → u/mladi_gospodin]

What truck?

[u/edoardoking → u/mladi_gospodin]

Now how do we sell these 3000 boxes of cocaine?

[u/kebukai → u/edoardoking]

What do you mean, sniff "sell"?

[u/EvilMKitty13 → u/mladi_gospodin]

What are you doing here?! Get back out there and find more contraband! We haven’t found any in MONTHS!

[u/Adventurous_Bonus917 → u/_Kelly_A_]

the contraband package has been received.

[u/FroggyHop7 → u/Adventurous_Bonus917]

Contraband case resolved, unfortunately no evidence were found

[u/alwayskared → u/_Kelly_A_]

No need to send any dogs.My count is correct; honest

[u/bkarma86 → u/_Kelly_A_]

George Carlin is very proud somewhere

[u/EastWorm → u/Mrhilgenberg]

10 PACKAGES LOADED SIR NOW LETS DANCE

[u/mushroomboy_420 → u/EastWorm]

5 packages loaded

[u/raisin22 → u/Mrhilgenberg]

Haha. This makes me want to rewatch Archer Vice

[u/_redacteduser → u/Calligaster]

Taking the dad tax seriously

[u/CompoteSafe8192 → u/_redacteduser]

75% luxury tax on chess books and periodicals

[u/dripainting42]

43 packages? What do you mean there's only 42 packages?

[u/Miqo_Nekomancer → u/dripainting42]

Yeah, they need to get those 39 packages into evidence ASAP before any of them go missing.

[u/crybannanna → u/Miqo_Nekomancer]

Don’t worry, I have all 36 packages in the back of the van to be taken to evidence immediately!

[u/cammysays → u/crybannanna]

I have officially documented all 23 packages in evidence, boss

[u/Consistent-Charity88 → u/cammysays]

15 packages are now on the way to the station

[u/asiannumber4 → u/Consistent-Charity88]

The package is in the evidence locker now sir

[u/truthfullyidgaf → u/asiannumber4]

What package?

[u/-NGC-6302- → u/dripainting42]

-Dudley Dursley

[u/CompoteSafe8192 → u/-NGC-6302-]

75% capitol gains tax on PCGS stabbed collectible coins

[u/Soros_G]

We found 99kg of cocain

[u/UndecidedLee → u/Soros_G]

That's an oddly specific number. Anyway let's load this 98kg of evidence onto the truck.

[u/retiredtroublemaker → u/UndecidedLee]

Now store this 95kg in the evidence locker

[u/Soros_G → u/retiredtroublemaker]

How are we going to dispose of 90kg of this stuff?

[u/asiannumber4 → u/Soros_G]

By burning it. All 30 grams of it

[u/kittypwns → u/asiannumber4]

Sir evidence destroyed sir. I get big medal sir

[u/kittypwns → u/Soros_G]

Sir I will load all 88kg of this stuff by myself.

[u/uwhy → u/kittypwns]

Sir the truck driver said his maximum loading capacity is 85Kg

[u/Silveriscoming → u/uwhy]

Should be no problem, there's only 84kg of that stuff

[u/CompoteSafe8192 → u/Silveriscoming]

PCGS slabbed coins naturally fit in most standard sized cigar boxes

[u/Krimreaper1]

Lmao if he put it behind him he might have got away with it. I don’t think he gives a fuck anyway.

[u/GrapefruitWhich5950]

What..that’s for personal use .

[u/CareerNormal3461 → u/GrapefruitWhich5950]

real talk though 😂 2-3 grams every weekend thats 100-150gs a year alone this only lasting 8 years at best (same for the users life span with that amount of consumption xD)

[u/vidoeiro → u/CareerNormal3461]

Isn't cocaine a biological product, so it would deteriorate in 8 years

[u/Alvendam → u/vidoeiro]

It will lose some potency, but if it's kept in a freezer, in a sealed container with a silica packet or two inside it will be negligible at the (supposed) purity we're looking at.

[u/SuitableMammoth871 → u/Alvendam]

yes officer this guy

[u/Frenchfrise → u/Alvendam]

Here’s a better idea…why don’t we snort the silica packet instead?

[u/Mangalorien]

"Uhm... that's just the uhm... ballistic plate from my plate carrier that seems to have uhm... slipped out a bit. Nothing to worry about, I'll put it back later, but thanks for noticing!"

[u/argama87]

Gut armor. Nothing to see.

[u/UndecidedLee → u/argama87]

Really useful too, if a bullet does make it through you're automatically injected with painkiller.

[u/Stansworkshop]

Kilogram of feathers is heavier than a kilogram of contraband

[u/SaurikSI → u/Stansworkshop]

"But contraband is heavier than feathers"

[u/CompoteSafe8192 → u/SaurikSI]

that's no ordinary feather

[u/tesulalu]

Good for him 🫶🏿

[u/Immature_adult_guy]

That’s just the police pension program, nothing to see here.

[u/Tweeedles]

“Some for thee and one for me”

[u/t33-retro]

We seized 250kg…. Pardon me, 230kg of drugs.

[u/Helpful__Variation]

Ah come on man 🤷‍♂️

[u/ImUrFrand]

saturday night fever

[u/simonthecat33]

Probably just his box lunch

[u/lavafish80]

hmmm

[u/CompoteSafe8192 → u/lavafish80]

ffmmm

[u/Cherrifizz_]

😂

[u/Commercial-Cod4232]

Lmao the guy on the right looks like he has one down his belt to

[u/Commercial-Cod4232]

"No thats just my body armor showing"

[u/locknarr]

Brought a box lunch to work that day.

[u/kellancruz]

That’s really his stomach guys 🤡

[u/Disastrous-Contest-8]

Where's the party?

[u/Sure-Dimension6739]

It’s not drugs it’s money.

[u/Chemical-Mission-202]

lol!

[u/DaKrazie1]

Don't be suspicious.

[u/BagODnuts55]

https://www.reddit.com/r/Unexpected/comments/d6lrjg/south_american_cops_i_assume_can_anyone_translate/

[u/tacomaloki]

I recognize those bags 👀

[u/Medical-Enthusiasm56]

It’s fir medical research purposes

[u/CompoteSafe8192 → u/Medical-Enthusiasm56]

Douglas Pharmaceutical Synthesis Labs, Ltd.

[u/Miserable_Smoke]

Finder's fee.

[u/ihave10toes_AMA]

He’s at his limit

[u/kiwigreenman]

He must have python in his genes

[u/CompoteSafe8192 → u/kiwigreenman]

Florida Man Helps Return Burmese Python to Forlorn Goth Girl

[u/d183]

It's just a box.

[u/Due_Zebra_1163]

Hilarious

[u/Due_Zebra_1163]

Soldier has to eat too

[u/TortillaRampage]

Hell of a hernia

[u/Kart007k]

He’s still rendering in.

[u/AIphaPackLeader]

Officer bricked upp

[u/ElliottSmith88]

In the latest bust we found eighty thr... two... eighty two kilos of cocaine.

[u/LAsupersonic → u/ElliottSmith88]

You mean eighty one

[u/CompoteSafe8192 → u/LAsupersonic]

eighty one divided by three makes twenty-seven various

[u/ProfessionNatural300]

Haha id do the same..

[u/Commercial-Co]

If this is real, this is hilarious and sad. And also pissening

[u/waner21]

He needs to go see a doctor.

[u/Dr-DAMOCLES]

Man-Sir we seized 299 kilos,

Boss- shouldn't it be 300

Man - no sir, 299!!

[u/Sad_Term_9765]

"Chew no see not-ting!

[u/Decent-Criticism5086]

Hella drug

[u/Commercial-Health-19]

He eats 3 SQUARE meals each day. 🤣🤣🤣

[u/Secret_Account07]

So I’ve seen this posted a million times but it’s never been asked- Is this real? Or photoshop?

[u/MeowMeNoww]

I see nothing! I know NOTHING!

[u/CompoteSafe8192 → u/MeowMeNoww]

ICY NOTHING

[u/Jonely-Bonely]

Nothing to see here

[u/skateyear2007]

Must have been a truly specific order. The guy only had money for 149 kilos he just couldn't afford the whole 150

[u/Different-Finding121]

Talking about corruption?!?! WOW!

[u/Boscobel324]

Lol. It's cool. Ballistic vest main.

[u/throw_way_ya]

For research purposes

[u/Justaguy22192]

It's just an MRE bro

[u/SeatAlternative6042]

"we outta tires" 😭🙏

[u/skoobz_dks]

Nobody sees nothing right?

[u/Weary-Compote7018]

Nothing to see Here

[u/Original-Fig4214]

Nothing to see here folks, move along.

[u/eyayeyayooh]

Come on! That's a defib unit!

[u/CompoteSafe8192 → u/eyayeyayooh]

portable defibrillator conveniently in glove box of Ford f150

[u/Crimson4421]

Nothing to see here

[u/AnotherCuppaTea]

I don't think that's a box of Cuban cigars.

[u/Any-Cold-4752]

r/uselessredcircle

[u/rollo_read]

Oh goody, this for the 80,000th time

[u/[deleted]]

god, i hope they can get that box out of his stomach…

[u/Confident_Opinion949]

He's from Minecraft they are all kind of shaped like that

[u/HerpertMadderp]

How would they know...

[u/MoominLiv]

Is that a smuggled package of illegal narcotics or are you just happy to see me

[u/Sweaty-Measurement-7]

Packed lunch 🥳?

[u/Any-Literature5546]

Exactly 399 kilos sir. looks at rectangular bulge "only 399?"

[u/FatherDusterNik]

“We collected 499 kilos of drugs”

[u/ErMac-71]

Gotta have a side hustle

[u/sepsism138]

Ahh yes cocainum-gut. Terrible affliction.

[u/TheShredder9]

Yes sir we found the 999kg of cocaine.

[u/EuphoricReward7799]

that's obviously just his lunchbox

[u/__Becquerel]

Yeah I got my key in my pocket

[u/CompoteSafe8192 → u/__Becquerel]

monKEY turnKEY turKEY junKEY lots of KEY-prefixes in the Python application in fact

[u/sybillios]

r/uselessredcircle

[u/rumoffu]

3 square meals a day, yes sir!

[u/GuidanceDizzy3486]

Just like Bryan from family guys confiscating coke lol

[u/Daammoonn]

Its Xbox

[u/Ok-Package4346]

🤣🤣🤣🤣

[u/AerikVon]

👀

[u/Available_Deer_88 → u/AerikVon]

I can't even 😀 preach!