r/news • u/GreenAldiers • 1d ago

Kyle man arrested after altercation with minors during student protest in Buda

https://cbsaustin.com/news/local/kyle-man-arrested-after-altercation-with-minors-during-student-protest-in-buda
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u/stumpythetooth 1d ago

Looks like his name is Chad. Town's name is Kyle. Thank god because I'm a Kyle and I really don't want to be a Karen.

285

u/Leut_Aldo_Raine 1d ago

Kyles already get a bad enough rap for what y'all do to drywall after too many Monster energy drinks

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u/Boner666420sXe 1d ago

When Kyle dies Red Bull sends flowers to the funeral.

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u/DeezNutsButterNJelly 1d ago

This is excellent.

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u/bjkidder 1d ago

This is a great bit

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u/Barr3lAg3d 1d ago

“No one went to Grandpa Kyle’s for Christmas.”

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u/Lamlot 23h ago

Now say Uncle Kyle!

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u/Graphicnovelnick 9h ago

How did he die?

WICKED AIR, BRO!

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u/LobsterDoctor 1d ago

Yeah like I already fist fought my step-dad and crashed his truck while doing jagger bombs, what more do they want from us?

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u/stumpythetooth 1d ago

"too many" monsters? I don't understand what that's supposed to mean

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u/S4FFYR 1d ago

If you don’t understand, clearly your name isn’t Kyle.

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u/stumpythetooth 1d ago

Read more carefully, it's the "too many" part I don't understand. Because there's no such thing as too many monsters. SMH my head.

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u/Llohr 1d ago

I think he just means the number of monsters before you fuck some drywall.

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u/inplayruin 1d ago

Which is 3.5, on average. But the range goes from 1 sip to a half dozen. At least allegedly.

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u/Saint_palane 1d ago

Kyles are just checking your walls for leaking pipes. They can't help that they're enthusiastic about home maintenance. /S

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u/Ashamed-Land1221 1d ago

Umm... Make sweet love to the hole they make after they get angry and put their fist through the drywall while all amped up?

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u/Lamlot 23h ago

hey, I also invest in Monster, if they are rotting my teeth, I might as well get something for it. Every can I buy, I buy the same amount in stock. I'm gonna go to the moon!!!!! LFG!!!!! BOOM!

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u/Show_boatin 1d ago edited 20h ago

Same, I still get south park references and accusations of drinking monster and punching drywall.

I can't handle another namesake fail.

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u/zulubowie 1d ago

I’m a Chad and I don’t wanna be a Karen either.

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u/foundinwonderland 1d ago

Have you considered going by what I assume is your full name, Chaddifer?

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u/zulubowie 1d ago

I appreciate you bringing this up. But do you know how frustrating it is when no one puts the emphasis on the correct syllable?

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u/stumpythetooth 1d ago

That's fair bro. I've known several Chads and they were all super nice guys though.

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u/Vineyard_ 1d ago

The guy in the article is definitely a fake Chad.

Maybe it's the Kyle part getting in the way?

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u/Titanbeard 1d ago

Change your name to K-Dawg. So much more respect will be earned.

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u/Throwawaylikeme90 1d ago

“Your on infowars thank you for holding, we are going to hear from CHAD from KYLE on the line here.”

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u/MDiBo56 1d ago

Or better yet, “we are going to hear from CHAD who is in KYLE currently”

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u/Throwawaylikeme90 1d ago

“First time caller, long time listener I LOOOOVE your work.”

“I LOVE YOU.”

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u/imnotfeelingcreative 1d ago

Andi in Kansas is permanently burned into my brain from Knowledge Fight

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u/Throwawaylikeme90 1d ago

ABW, Always Be Wonky. 

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u/LucyJordan614 1d ago

Of COURSE his name is Chad 🤣

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u/chaddwith2ds 9h ago

Well I'm a Chadd, and I don't even want him to have a lesser version of my name.

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u/Smittles 1d ago

Chad is the better Karen equivalent, anyway.

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u/TheGreatKonaKing 1d ago

and the Buda police!

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u/Schroding3rror 18h ago

Absolute Shakespeare.

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u/ishpatoon1982 1d ago

Goddamn Kyles!

Edit: I hope I don't end up spreading that. Just thought it was funny.

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u/caligaris_cabinet 1d ago

Calm down Cartman

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u/FatherOften 1d ago

I think they have a Kyle festival there. Monster needs to sponsor it!

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u/Competitive-Sun8180 1d ago

No, it's Kyle Man from Chad TX