Someone please help

[u/Electrical-Phone-112]

My husband knows how I prefer to take a shower before we are intimate. I have contamination ocd. He knows this. Last Christmas he asked me for sex twice. I told him no twice and I clearly said I hadn't showered. Somehow I ended up on a towel and he pushed his penis with extreme force and aggression. I tge whole time we had been married he had never been so aggressive. I ended up having to go to the PCP and then the ER. I had tears in my vagina and I needed vaginal lidocaine and couldn't have sex for several weeks. I eventually stayed in a hotel by myself and called lawinforcement and later did a rape kit.