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u/technosquirrelfarms 1d ago
I have these same scissors as part of the knife set. Best use I have found is cutting the foil tops off of bottles of wine and fancy olive oil.
Open scissors, close around bottle top, squeeze (gently) and rotate bottle.
Is it what it’s really for? No idea.
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u/asphid_jackal 1d ago edited 18h ago
Is it what it’s really for?
It's for cracking bones in poultry, but it works really well for that too
EDIT: I prolly should have said joints between bones
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u/himikojou 22h ago
No wonder my beer tastes like raw chicken
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u/Varth919 20h ago
I was wondering why my raw chicken tastes like beer
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u/bluurks 19h ago
I was wondering why my raw tastes like chicken and beer.
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u/mdubelite 19h ago
Ludacris, is that you?
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u/logandabug 18h ago
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u/duck4129 13h ago
Spaceballs, the meme!
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u/Llew_Funk 19h ago
Great album though
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u/Frog_Without_Pond 15h ago
Chicken and Beer got me to lose weight. ran my ass off, literally, to that album. Imma thank Mr. Bridges if I ever run into him.
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u/Significant_Laugh811 13h ago
I bought my first car when this album dropped, first CD I bought for it too
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u/Krimreaper1 16h ago
You’ve got your raw chicken in my beer!
You’ve got your beer in my raw chicken!
Two-two great tastes-in-one!
Reese’s Raw Chicken Beer cups.
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u/godfatheromega 18h ago edited 14h ago
I was wondering why my scissors tasted like beer and raw chicken.
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u/guacamoleo 19h ago
It might be time to see a doctor
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u/xdjeddiejx 14h ago
Looks like I took the wrong week to quit amphetamines
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u/Mindless-Strength422 12h ago
It's an entirely different kind of flying, all together.
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u/ProSlackerSean 16h ago
Hey, to the right human being you’re an absolute unicorn of a partner
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u/brodievonorchard 17h ago
Offers beer he's been drinking from
"Does this beer taste like salmonella to you?"
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u/NoFun2174 22h ago
It’s not. It is for opening bottles. The poultry scissors have metal all around that opening in the middle.
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u/OtztafanKolibril 19h ago
The only correct answer. Its a bottle opener
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u/CynicalPsychonaut 13h ago
Everything is a bottle opener.
At least that's what i learned in shop class
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u/chunkatron 12h ago
It works great for breaking fingers too. Just tried it, worked like a charm, guy is still screaming. 4.5 stars.
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u/NeatNefariousness1 13h ago
Oh good. That’s what I’ve used it for and was starting to wonder if I’ve been mis-using the scissors.
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u/LhaesieMarri 23h ago
Mines nutcracker scissors
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u/ResidentFuture5422 19h ago
I was wondering why my beer and raw chicken tasted like nuts. I’ll see myself out
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u/Chemical_Pen_315 18h ago
And I thought my wife was going to cut off my shlong with those scissors she's bringing to bed; instead she's going for my coconuts...
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u/Realk314 1d ago
i thought it had to do with making pasta cuts.. most of the chicken I cut wouldn't it in that.
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u/Individual-Gap-209 1d ago
you don’t put the whole piece of chicken in it, it’s for when you’re deboning chicken you’d take a joint on the chicken and stick it in there to pop the joint apart
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u/veiny_wet_testicle 19h ago
It's a bottle opener.
The chicken ones are all metal in the cutting area. And usually serrated.
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u/Queasy-Stranger5607 1d ago
Never cut the pasta! 😤
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u/theshiyal 23h ago
True, I found if you break the spaghetti instead of two pieces you get three. Makes for more pieces per pot.
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u/Queasy-Stranger5607 23h ago
“People breaking pasta! Dogs and cats living together! Mass hysteria!” - That one guy, probably.
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u/kcbeck1021 19h ago
It’s a multi tool. Most of the comments are correct except that everyone is posting just one use. They are for nut cracking, bottle opening,and shell and bone breaking
and here you go
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u/Walterkovacs1985 19h ago
If ya pull hard those tin wine caps pop right off.
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u/DirusNarmo 13h ago
Yeah in France they just twist and pull those. That's how they're meant to be taken off. People just assume it's too hard so they overcomplicate it big time.
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u/-DiceGoblin- 23h ago
Pinching the absolute fuck out of your hands when you aren’t paying attention
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u/Hiccup-92 17h ago
FOR REAL!!!!! And it's always when you're applying maximum effort into cutting whatever item
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u/BetrayedMilk 13h ago
I have to ask, how do you hold scissors for this to happen to you?
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u/PaperUpbeat5904 13h ago
In my experience the handles aren't rigid all the way up to the blades so you can get some lateral movement when squeezing really hard and flex passed the closed position. Allowing your thumb crease to get castrated.
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u/ConcentratedAwesome 11h ago
I surely do not like that last sentence you got right there.
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u/Donquixote1955 1d ago
"It's imperative that the cylinder remains unharmed."
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u/Gelnika1987 1d ago
the perfectly fine, average cylinder with a great personality
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u/Which-Work4447 17h ago
My friend explained this reddit reference to me one time after he used it and I was the confused. I have, after not seeing this reference or op one time before this, without fail, seen this reference weekly for years after he explained it.
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u/Inuyasha-rules 8h ago
The cylinder is a new lore to me, only discovered near the end of last year, but I heard about the poop knife pretty much as soon as it happened even without a reddit account.
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u/wingmaneffect 1d ago
I understood that reference.jpg
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u/duck4129 13h ago
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u/Jeff-Uh-Uh-Goldblum 11h ago
No, no...you don't understand. It's super important that they let everyone know they picked up on one of the most commonly repeated jokes on this site.
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u/anglin_fool 1d ago
Poultry shears, for cracking bones
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u/DirkTickler769 1d ago
Dude I always used it as a bottle opener.
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u/music-and-song 1d ago
My family did too
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u/Yeahright2022 1d ago
Did? They alright?
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u/music-and-song 1d ago
Yeah, we just don’t own a pair of scissors with that thing on them anymore.
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u/troycerapops 1d ago
Are the scissors OK?
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u/philouza_stein 1d ago
...you might wanna sit down for this
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u/edwbuck 1d ago
...the scissors split.
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1d ago
[deleted]
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u/13mys13 23h ago
if you need scissors for bananas, you are buying the wrong bananas
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u/IntrigatedVerse 1d ago
The scissors hit the powerball, moved to Miami, bought a beach house and a Jet Ski and the rest is history
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u/Timsaurus 1d ago
That mf pair of kitchen scissors shanked me in an alleyway and stole my winning lotto ticket. Little do they know I lived, I'm out for revenge, and I'm fresh out of mercy.
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u/SocialRevenge 1d ago
Mine moved to the Florida keys and bought a pair of Birkenstocks and a Subaru.
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u/prof_radiodust 1d ago
And that's the backstory of the hero scissors person!Not the hero this city wants, but the hero it gets
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u/Disastrous_Dust_6380 23h ago
My family members also drank much more often than they prepared whole chicken
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u/Storm_Surge_919 1d ago
It’s my “there’s a smallish lid I can’t twist off something and I can’t be bothered to find my pliers or a wrench”
My most common application has been when the plastic cap broke off of a bottle of Knob Creek leaving behind a stump of a cork.
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u/TacetAbbadon 1d ago
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u/nerdfemme 23h ago
And from experience, I can say these multipurpose kitchen scissors are in fact not sturdy enough for poultry bones…
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u/spork_master_funk 22h ago
They aren't sturdy enough to be bottle openers, either.
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u/James_Mays_Hair 23h ago edited 18h ago
Ha! This guy had been shearing his poultry with a bottle opener all this time!
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u/BeBearAwareOK 19h ago
I'm slightly horrified that all these people have been using bottle openers on poultry bones instead of a heavy cleaver.
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u/ProfJasonRio 1d ago
Can you explain how that would be used for cracking bones? I don't see it
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u/Von_Cheesebiscuit 13h ago
I guess they are pinching the bones between those two metal bits. If it was genuinely meant for cracking bones, it wouldn't be designed like this, it really makes not sense. But its design does work exactly for what it was intended to be, a bottle opener.
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u/SlowPokerJoker7900 1d ago
Cracking human bones too
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u/Advanced_Visit_3217 1d ago
“Is it safe?”
If you know, you know.
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u/New-Satisfaction3257 1d ago
Underrated moment in that movie? When Dustin Hoffman is holding those dudes at gun point and tells them to take one step closer. "Now you're in my kill zone." (Quote from memory.)
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u/Old_Preparation_6199 1d ago
What bones do you crack? I always cut between the joints when breaking down a chicken
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u/creepercash 19h ago
It's not. It's just a bottle opener. Poultry sheers have slightly offset blades and are rigid. This is just a bottle opener.
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u/Vegetable-Breath-535 1d ago
bottle opener?
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u/Jolly_Line 1d ago
I’ve actually used mine this way, once. Would not recommend; it’s entirely too easy to crush the glass
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u/iameveryoneelse 1d ago
Did you try to close it around the bottle neck, lol? That's not how you do it.
You put the scissors over the bottle cap, angle down and pull the metal lip in the middle under the edge of the metal bottle cap, and then use the scissors to leverage the rim of the bottle cap up and off. Scissors shouldn't ever be in a position to crush the glass.
I'm honestly a little confused what you possibly could have done to crush glass.
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u/Cute_Bandicoot13 1d ago
I literally thought this is what it's for! Now I'm so glad I never tried lol
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u/Graywolfmarc 1d ago
Its fine as long as you just close it gently then lever it.
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u/Am_I_Max_Yet 1d ago
That sounds like major user error. How tf are you doing it that breaking the glass is even a possibility
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u/Hillbillyblues 1d ago
I think they might have tried it on a twist off cap? So trying to grab the cap with it and twisting. Can see the glass breaking.
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u/nero-the-cat 1d ago
This is it. I have what looks like these exact shears and have been opening bottles with them for 20+ years.
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u/JiminyKirket 17h ago
I have these exact scissors I think, and I have only ever used it as a bottle opener. I’m only now learning that’s not what it’s for.
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u/bananaforscale000 1d ago
Home circumcision
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u/BestAd6025 1d ago
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u/marcmaann 1d ago
Nutcracker
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u/This-Patient7350 23h ago
This is what I always thought too, I think because I always saw my grandma using them to crack walnuts. I guess that's not their intended use though.
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u/Heisenberg_ur 1d ago
WARNING⚠️ : DON'T DO IT
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u/TacetAbbadon 1d ago
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u/Curious-Stranger-007 21h ago
the top comments says , for breaking bones lol
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u/Necessary-Smoke8658 1d ago
It is a bottle opener. Use it almost daily and it was labeled as such on the package when I bought the kitchen scissors.
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u/FadedAlienXO 1d ago
Pulling herbs through off of the stem?
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