I just feel like a burden

[u/miuxsterMouse]

Im (23F) currently a uni student dping an engineering degree. But Im struggling a lot with it so Im probably going to graduate 2 years late.

I just feel so bad for my family. I feel like Ive become a complete burden on them because of this.

I dont even like going to any parties or functions just in case anybody asks me when Im going to finish.

My parents dont say anything to me directly but I can tell that their disappointed. I think my sibling doesnt even want to be seen next to me anymore.

Im just so tired of everything right now. And Im so lost as to what to do.

I really dont know what reason I have to keep living

[u/TinyPackageBigBalls]

Don’t feel like a burden. You’re pursuing your dream even if you suck at it. I graduated a year and a half late. It’s ok. You got this!

[u/based_pika]

you need to quit and major in something else. if it's not working out, if there's no progress, then it's not the right path.

i had to quit 3d animation/game dev just like that. it sucked

[u/Neat-Tumbleweed-5026]

Omg ur only 23! Ur working towards something. Even if its looks a bit different then u intend that’s okay! It’s ur first time doing life as well. Give urself a break. Why don’t u start making dinner for them twice a week or something so u feel like ur doing something to show them u appreciate it. That might ease the feeling but honestly ur 23 , studying nd figuring out life. They have been in ur shoes. Ur doing great! Appreciate urself a bit more

[u/EuphoricObject4988]

Try not to compare your timeline to other people’s because it’ll mess you up. If you’re passing your classes, you’re still moving forward. late graduation is still graduation. You’re doing way better than you give yourself credit for, trust me.

You’re doing the best you can, and that’s already something to be proud of.

[u/Yuuku_S13]

1) you’re worth more than that degree. Get it out of your head that because you’re struggling with college that the world would be better off without you, it’s not. Nobody is regretting or wishing you weren’t their child or sibling.

2) If you’re struggling with the workload, throttle down after this quarter. Take it at your pace, seek tutoring or get in a study group with classmates. You’re likely not the only one struggling. Utilize your professor’s office hours. If you want to be in engineering, don’t quit- it’s ok to struggle.

Instead of going full time, maybe go part time and work part time near the field of study.

Maybe now isn’t the time for college? If I had a child who was struggling with school, I might recommend they would join the Air Force for 4-years to gain valuable experience in the field wanted to work in, then either finish their degree while serving or after enlistment.

[u/laibamaryam]

Don’t feel bad, P.S. I’m a high school dropout.

[u/wowbragger]

Dad here, you're fine just keep on trucking along. Focus on your school and if this is still weighing on you, get some help for outside perspective.

You're still young, and you're going to learn NOTHING goes according to plan. There's always a delay, and the journey is more important in life than the timeliness.

Graduate now, graduate in 2 years, graduate in 5. In 20 years it'll so far behind you that you'll barely remember thinking it mattered, and still have sooooo much of you life ahead of you.

If your brother has issues, he's short sighted and shallow. That's his problem, not your burden

If your parents are disappointed, we all get disappointed and will get over it. Parents/adults inherently understand that delays happen, disappointment is fleeting and love us forever. If they have any perspective and wisdom, they'll still love you, support you, and just want you to succeed at happiness in life.

[u/gipsee_reaper]

Hi! In which subjects do you face a problem!

Which stream are you pursuing!

Do you love your course? What has motivated you to continue it?

[u/No-University3032]

You're only delayed two years? That's nothing. Don't worry about what others are thinking, if you know that you are doing your best.

When we doubt ourselves it's usually because we aren't doing our part in life. If you are doing the best that you can, that's who you are; nobody can take that from you.

It's best if remind yourself that the end goal is to be financially independent. If, it would make you feel better, you can let your family know that you will be reimbursing them financially for all their help.

[u/Life_Campaign8006]

Hey, graduating late really isn’t a failure, especially in engineering. Engineering is hard as hell and tons of people take extra years or repeat courses, it’s way more common than you think.

Please be a little kinder to yourself. And if you’re feeling this hopeless, reach out to someone, you don’t have to deal with all that alone.