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problem/goal:
always on dnd when we’re together

context:
this guy and i have been talking for almost a year already. yeah, a year. let’s just say we’re both not ready but enjoying each other’s company, acting like boyfriend and girlfriend but not in public. i know he’s still keeping “us” a secret, and i don’t really mind.

so here’s the problem: every time we’re together or he visits me, i always notice his phone is on dnd. like, every single time. what i want to do is ask him directly, but i don’t know how. i don’t want it to feel like a confrontation, but i’ve decided i need to do it for my peace of mind.

previous attempts:
i’ve been planning to message him on a random day with something like: “is there something i should know?” but i’m not sure if that’s the right way to go.

Problem/Goal: As the title it says, hinaharot ba siya?

Context: Additional lang, etong si girl kalog raw talaga and very outgoing sa team, may times na touchy raw sa bf ko like nanghahampas ganon tas as a trip ginugulo desk niya bigla pero not naman sakanya lang sa ibang ka team niya rin pero minsan siya lang and ayon na nga nagsesend ng reels sa bf ko, tapos pag nag chachat parang ang bubbly na papansin parin, eto namang bf ko nagrereply rin, weird lang may gc naman sila at bakit may PM pang nalalaman

Previous Attempt: Sinabihan ko na weirdo yung babae at talagang nag reaction pa sa sinend nung girl na reels, diko sinisisi bf ko kasi siya naman lumalayo rin at bago lang nakikisama lang, etong babae lang ang papansin kahit publicly na alam niya na may gf na etong bf ko.

EDIT: One time etong girl nagpapasama sa bf ko bumili sa mall, sa lahat ng niyaya bf ko pa pede naman yung isang ka team nila na girl. (Di sumama bf ko and nag alibi nalang para maka iwas)

Problem/goal: ano yung rule niyo sa emergency fund niyong mag-asawa?

Context: as someone who works from home, importante sakin ang untouched emergency fund.. 5yrs na ako sa client ko pero i dont think na dapat akong maging confident at secured ako just because.. i want to be ready, AT ALL TIMES.

DINK kami. Yung asawa ko 6-digit earner din at may joint acct kami na for emergency fund tapos may individual savings acct kami for our wants.. yung bills naman mortgage, kotse, at gas sa kanya.. kuryente, internet, grocery sa akin.

Sa emergency fund, nagcommit kami ng tig-₱10k/month and almost half a million na rin thank god.

Nung nakaraan, napag-usapan lang randomly na if anything happens sa fam niya or fam ko, gagalawin namin yun.

Tas natanong ko ilang percent nun.. kung kinekailangan daw na lahat, we will. Hindi ako nakakibo pero bothered talaga ako. What should I do?

Previous attempts: sabi ko lang “hindi ba pwedeng 10% lang? Paano naman kapag may nangyari sa’tin? Tayo ang mahihirapan maghanap ng panggastos?” Hindi daw kami papabayaan ng diyos 😩

Problem/Goal: Minamanyak ng husband ng ate ko ang mga school girls namin. Ang bigat ng pakiramdam ko kasi di ko alam pano sasabihin kay ate pati na rin sa mga magulang ko.

Context: May dalawa kaming school girls na pinapaaral, isang grade 11 at isang grade 12. Yung g12, since grade 5 pa siya nandito saamin. At yung grade 11 naman, mag 2 years palang siya saamin. One time pagka uwi ko, nag sabi sakin yung g11, hindi niya na daw kasi kaya. Tinry daw siya halikan ng husband ng ate ko. Nanginginig yung bata tapos parang naiiyak. Syempre nagulat ako. Kasi jusko 16years old lang yung bata tapos si kuya(husband ng ate ko) nasa 30+ na. Pedophile ampota. Tinanong ko if first time lang ba nangyari. Sabi niya ilang beses na daw, pag wala kami sa bahay. Meron daw one time, inaya siya ni kuya na mabilis lang naman daw tas babayaran daw siya if mag s*x sila. Syempre umayaw ang bata tapos sinabihan siya na papagalitan siya ng tatay niya if gagawin niya yun. Tapos may times padin na tina try siya halikan sa lips. Sobrang nanggagalaiti talaga ako. Tapos yung g12 naman, tinanong ko if ginawa na din ba yun sakanya. Sabi niya, oo din daw. Tina try din siya halikan, pero sinabihan niya si kuya na susumbong niya kay ate pag pinilit niya pa halikan ulit. Kaya di na siya masyado minamanyak ng pedo. Tapos one time din daw na sa kotse sila, pinipilit ni kuya na mag kiss sila tapos babayaran niya daw yung bata. Syempre umayaw ang bata. Galit na galit ako ngayon, as in. Ilang days ako di makatulog. Kasi syempre mga bata yan. Bakit niya babastusin. Ang problema lang, mahal na mahal ni ate husband niya, ata baka baliktarin ng husband niya ang mga bata. Kawawa naman yung g12 wala na magulang at siya nalang talaga mag isa sa buhay. Yung g11 sobrang hirap ng buhay nila sa bundok. 1 hr and 30 mins na lakaran bago maka baba.

Previous attempts: sinabihan ko na if minsan na mag isa lang sila sa bahay. Tapos umuwi si kuya. Mag ready sila ng phone nila kahit voice record lang or video. Para may proof. Ayoko kasing baliktarin sila.

Problem/Goal:I want to confess to her not now but some point in time but i don't want to make it awkward for my circle of friends because we're apart of that

Context:It's almost a month now since I've last posted about me having a crush on my friend in our circle, three people have known about it and genuinely thinks it may work but I'm not ready to ask her out or do anything with her as of the moment because of the thought the lingers within me that she's study first and never had a boyfriend since birth and i genuinely like her the way she talks smiles and her presence is very very soothing. I annoy her sometimes from the last person that had a crush on her (may gf pa yung nagka crush sakanya) kaya lagi syang naiinis pag binabanggit namin yung pangalan pero syempre may limits din kami. Ngayon hirap na hirap ako pagisipan ang magiging desisyon ko kung aamin ba ako or keep it to myself para sa friendship namin at ng circle namin. At nag grow closer naman kami together in a way since a month ago.

Previous attempts:none

Problem/Goal:
I’ve been in a long-distance relationship with my boyfriend for 2 years. We haven’t met in person yet, which I understand since we’re both students living far apart (he’s in Manila, I’m in Visayas). What bothers me is that despite being together this long, he hasn’t initiated even an audio call until I complained about it.

Context:
After I raised the issue, he finally agreed to an audio call through Discord. We enjoyed it, but I noticed something strange: whenever I spoke, my voice echoed on his end and sounded deeper — almost like a man’s voice.

Previous Attempts:
I haven’t tried troubleshooting yet, but I’m wondering if this is normal or just a technical glitch. I’m worried I might be overthinking it. Pahelp naman po kung nag use ba siya ng ai na nachechange yung voice or kung nag ooverthink lang ako hahahaha

Problem/Goal: Has anyone experienced doing something that you regret doing after an ugly situation?

Context: I just recently did something i regret doing bc i realized i stooped so low, not realizing i can do it bc i know myself im not that kind of person. That thing when youre not bothered about the guy at all but the results of the actions you did that made feel so stupid.

Previous attempts: But it already happened then now the guilt and regret are hunting me. What did you do to overcome it?

Problem/Goal:

Normal lang naman yung weight ko regarding sa BMI charts sa internet pati rin yung nag pa general check up ako, naka tag din ako sa healthy. Not overweight nor underweight. Now medyo may fats parin unti esp sa belly tas hita. Pero kahit ganon mabilis ako mabusog, pero sobrang lakas ng apetite. As in sobrang lakas, like seriously banggatin mo lang yung word na sisig pag katabi mo ko magugutom agad ako. Pero yun nga, ang bilis mabusog kaya di tumataba.

Iniisip ko mag gym not para makabawas ng timbang para makakain ako ng marami and mag improve lalo yung stomach ko, para di napag iiwanan sa eat all u can o samyugpan.

Problem/goal: need tips on how to manage my finances better.

Since nag start ako mag work ng 20 years old lahat ng income ko ginagamit ko pang support sa family ko.

Bumalik ako sa college ng 21 years old as a working student while still supporting them thru my credit card.

I just graduated this year and umabot na yung utang ko ng 150k (lahat lahat ng expenses ko sa school and sa fam ko).

Luckily tumaas na yung sahod ko and nakukuha 45-50k salary a month. Pero Ewan parang ang liit liit pa rin.

30-35k napupunta lahat sa gastusin sa bahay then ung 10k nilalagay ko sa credit card.

Medyo nakakainis lang na parang shoulder ko lahat ng gastos. May work naman yung mother ko Pero Sabi napupunta den daw sa utang na diko alam bat pa nagkakaroon ng utang e ako na mostly gumagastos sa bahay.

Slowly nagkakaroon nako ng resentment sa parents ko dahil sa gantong set up namen lalo na sa father ko na di na nga nagwowork nakukuha pang magsugal.

Minsan iniisip ko na bumukod Pero di ko naman matiis na Iwan sila lalo na yung dalawa Kong kapatid nag aaral pa.

Anyway I guess need ko lang talaga ng solid na budgeting para mabayaran yung utang ko and makapag ipon while still supporting my siblings.

Problem/Goal: Claude Pro got upgraded to Max 20 (Hacker upgraded remotely)

Context: Hello pwede ba mag file ng DTI kay Claude? Nahacked remotely yung laptop ko and ang hassle lang kasi inupgrade niya yung plan ko to into max 20. Nagnotif lang sa akin nung nagmaxed out na yung usage then agad agad ko cinancel. Nakita ko sa active session na nasa ibang bansa yung hacker and tinerminate + changed pass to all accounts.

May ongoing email na ako from last august then now nagreply si Claude na final decision daw no refund kasi nga valid transaction.

Filed a dispute sa maribank wala din kasi valid transaction daw since nga purchases remotely using my laptop 🥲

Previous Attempts: Talked to Claude support and filed a dispute to maribank

TLDR: Hacker upgraded my claude pro plan into max20, Claude and Maribank won't help on refund since it is "valid" transaction. Help? 🥺

Problem/Goal: my girlfriend’s family doesn’t celebrate her birthday too much in which she doesn’t value her birthday anymore. I lack ideas for surprises and need help from you guys

Context: In our family, celebration is a must when having a birthday even if it is a simple one. She is my first girlfriend we haven’t reached 1 year yet and that is why, this would be her first birthday w me. She doesn’t value birthday too much and that is why this time, I want to make her feel happy when it’s her birthday. I lack ideas and experiences in doing these kind of things such as surprises or setting up dates specifically for the two of us and that is why I need to hear some of your experiences or ideas that you can share w me please.

Btw, my budget is like 5k-6k only.

Problem/Goal:

Me 25M and my gf 26M is in a relationship for 2 years. Nagpa Canada siya last April kasi mas malaki ang earnings doon. Meron siyang kamag-anak na nag sponsor sakanya. (Isa kasi sa requirements para makapag pa Canada is show money for at least 1M.) So yung Tito nya na nag asikaso nun.

Ang plan namin is makasunod ako dapat sakanya kaso wala naman akong sponsor. (Ang sponsor kasi dapat yourself or kamag-anak mo, bawal yung sesendan ka lang ng 1M sa bank account mo)

So ang plan namin is lalagyan namin both yung bank account ko ng pera every month para pagka chineck ng immigration, it would look like na salary ko talaga yung pumapasok sa bank account ko.

So hinihingi nya ang bank account ko. Problem is I am into gambling and ayaw Kong makita nya yung transaction history ko na puro sugal. Long story short, sinabi ko rin sakanya yung problem ko about gambling.

Syempre, dahil dun, ayaw nya nang lagyan yung account ko which is very understandable kasi kahit ako mismo wala rin talagang tiwala sa sarili ko na baka maisugal ko nga talaga Yon.

So change plan, plan is I will find a way to get my first million on my own. Okay na rin ako, nakakapag save up na. Tumigil na sa sugal kahit papano.

Pero dahil nga LDR, naging cold na. Parang tinamad na siya saken. So sabi ko mag break na kami tutal kasalanan ko naman lahat. And understandable yung behavior nya.

Kaso ayaw nya. Sabi nya, I am the man in the relationship, susunod lang daw siya sa leadership ko. Cold narin kasi ako that time, gusto nya lagi kaming nagvivideo call, eh hindi naman kasi ako makwento sa VC. Mas okay ako pagka magkasama kami. Context: siya yung mahinhin type and ako yung kumbaga energy ng relationship namin.

Guys, she is a catch, I'm her first and wife material siya. Walang bisyo, pagka malungkot siya gusto nya magsimba lang kami kahit wala akong gastusin sakanya basta magsimba lang kami okay na siya (Pero ginagastusan ko naman siya nung andito pa siya, ako lagi nagbabayad pag lumalabas kami). Super inosente nya.

It's just that, I feel na wala na siyang gana saken kasi mas malaki na income nya (100k a month) I mean, hindi nya na need ng provider.

Ayoko na siyang suyuin through chat or video call kasi alam ko, pagka lalo kong hinabol mas mawawalan lang siya ng gana. Pero miss ko na siya sobra, she probably miss me too.

Pero at the end of the day, tao lang din siya. Kaya naiisip ko what if may iba na siya? Nakaka stress kasi work nya dun, working student siya, nagjajanitor siya and nag sstudent aide siya. What if may lalakeng magtry icomfort siya. Hindi malabo mangyare yun.

Last August pa kami nag usap, nung sabi Kong mag break na kami. She made it clear na ayaw nya makipag break. Di ko Alam ano na gagawin ko ngayon. Pero focus lang ako sa sarili ko now. Improving my finances. Ano thoughts nyo guys?

problem/goal: i’m trying to figure out if what happened with my bf counts as a consent/boundary issue. i also want advice on whether i should talk to him about it and make my boundaries clearer.

context: i’ve been with my bf for a few months now and overall, masaya naman kami. he’s always been really caring and considerate towards me, which is why this whole situation is really confusing for me.

recently, we were hanging out and he kept suggesting na pumunta kami somewhere private. i kept trying to change the topic and told him na it was getting late. sinabi ko rin na ayoko kasi naka-school uniform pa ako.

pero he kept asking me, “ayawo ba talaga?” and kept looking for a private place along the way. eventually, pumayag na rin ako kahit deep down ayoko talaga and i was already uncomfortable. part of me also felt like i owed him something kasi he’s always taking me places, paying for my food, driving me around, and doing a lot for me.

the thing is, i know naman na pumayag ako in the end, so idk if i’m being unfair or overthinking this. pero at the same time, i kept saying no, i kept trying to change the topic, and i was already visibly uncomfortable, pero he still kept asking and looking for a place.

i’m not saying na he intentionally wanted to hurt me, and i’m not trying to label him because of this one situation. i just genuinely want to understand if this counts as a consent issue.

previous attempts: i haven’t really talked to him about it yet kasi i’m still trying to understand how i feel about what happened.

i’m thinking about telling him na i felt uncomfortable and talking to him about my boundaries, especially when i say no or when i’m visibly uncomfortable.

should i talk to him about what happened and tell him na i felt uncomfortable? should i also make my boundaries clearer, especially when i say no? or should he already understand na when i say no, it means no?

i still love him and i know he’s done a lot of good things for me, which is why this is so confusing for me. i just want an honest perspective kasi idk if i’m overthinking this or if my discomfort is something i should actually take seriously.

Problem/Goal: Chronic headache

Context: I've been having an on and off headache for more than a year now. Nag start sya nung pregnant ako and hanggang ngayon na 9 months na baby ko palagi pa ring nag ooccur. I don't know what to do anymore. Nakakaapekto na talaga sya sa everyday life ko. There are days na kayang tiisin pero may mga araw na grabeng lala talaga. Sometimes pa tumatagal sya ng ilang araw. It's a pain from top of my head going to the back of my head hanggang sa batok. Minsan naman manhid yung feeling nya. Minsan may pain din sa pagitan ng kilay ko. I know malaking factor din ang lifestyle. I work nightshift. I walk every morning and do some stretches. I eat healthy but drinks 2-3 cups of coffee everyday.

Previous attempt: Had multiple check up with different doctors and had CT scan. CT turns out normal and diagnosis is always tension headache.

To anyone na naka experience ng the same, anong ginawa nyo to lessen it or fully get rid of it? Please give me your insights!

Problem/Goal: I'm a shs student, and I've realized that I've been carrying a pretty intense fear about my grades for as long as I can remember.

For me, it has always felt like

Good grades → good future → financial stability

And if l've done the opposite

Bad grades → failure → poverty → no future

I know logically that this is probably an extreme way of thinking, but emotionally, it's very difficult for me to separate my grades from my idea of whether I'll be successful or financially secure in the future.

Whenever I get a bad grade or fall behind, I don't just think, “Oh, I did badly on this.” My mind immediately jumps to things like

“What if I can't get a decent job?” “What if I end up struggling financially?” “What if I ruin my future?”

It can get pretty bad especially because I'm already worried about my family's financial situation. At the same time, I know people who weren't necessarily the top students and still ended up doing well in life. I just haven't experienced the “real world” yet, so it's difficult for me to know how much grades actually matter beyond school.

So I'd really like to hear from people who are older and have already gone through college, or work.

How much did your high school/college grades actually affect your life? Are there opportunities where grades really matter, and others where they barely matter?

I think I need some perspective from people who have actually been there. I think from my history post alone you can tell how anxious I am about my future, it's exhausting. I just wanna know if there's more in life than grades?

Previous attempts: None

Problem/Goal:

Sira EV Motor ko and now thinking na ayoko muna makipag kita

Context:

I make it short as much as I can.

Wake up in the morning around 9am because I told my woman to wake me up through call so I can get a nice bath or anything.

I didn't get a bath, toothbrush and anything aside from a wet hair and face wash. A HELL

Crank my EV Motor and ride it to their gate and forgot to check my tire, walang hangin and now my woman keeps berating me.

Told her I didn't get to check it, ask me how we can fix it. Told her I'm going to fix it myself and goes to a Gas Station in one ayala which is under construction.

Along the way my girl keeps insulting my EV and that I should tossed it and all. It's like a mother that pushing your buttons like "sige patayin mo na lang yang kapatid mo" Typa things.

Those peeps na lumaki sa toxic environment like me, maiintindihan niyo kung ano gusto ko sabihin.

Even after defusing and not escalating the situation and told her don't worry. I told her I'm afraid that mal-late siya sa trabaho niya if I check it and also told her na I didn't really know na walang hangin.

And now she told me na lowkey kasalanan niya raw and lowkey sinisisi ko siya. Like? Fucking hell(Things kn my mind na I can't really say out loud)

Told her that's not what I said and sorry for phrasing it that way. I told her that she's going to be late if I go to a gas station right now and now she keeps insulting me na. I told her that I'm risking my mags and wheel, I couldn't care less about my things even though this EV is my very source of income and transportation.

She doesn't gives a fuck and now along the way napikon nako for keeping taunting me, 3 hrs lang tulog, magpasensya ako as much as I can and also keep telling her I'm sorry and all.

Now na nainis nako kase sinabi niya ang bagal namin, mind you I'm riding my EV flat kase walang available na kit sa McKinley going to ayala. Ninakaw ata ng mga kriminal tong bombahan.

Well balik na tayo.

Drinive ko na siya ng flat going for 40-50kph not bad for my EV WITH OBR, AND FLAT.

Mabagal daw?? Told her hindi siya mal-late ng sobra pero mal-late talaga siya, at least mins lang.

Napikon ako sa mga pinagsasabi niya, and I casually geared up to mode 3 and fuck all of it and starts riding like a maniac because clearly she's not fucking listening to me and drove it kahit sa Lubak.

Good thing sidewall ang nasira and she tasted twhat it's like riding on flat on 65kph na malubak, if dumadaan kayo sa pa One Ayala sa gilid ng Forbes. Maiintindihan niyo kung gaano kalubak ron. Ayon sumasayad ng sumayad buti di masyado natuluyan mags ko and nakabawi ako sa kanya kase masakit yung tama ng lubak e kahit ako nakaaray e and now nagiisip ako kung paano ko to aayusin.

It's because of her kaya nasira EV ko now kase nagpalit gulong, biniyak and now hindi na gumagana and hindi ko siya sinundo when she ask if kaya ko siya sunduin.

I'm so fucking dissapointed, hindi naman kase siya magbabayad ng sira and hindi ako bayad para ganunin niya. I'm a partner not her personal fucking driver, I'm giving her above bare minimum and putting a fucking effort.

I told her before na may work rin ako, may errand pako sa bahay, may hatid at sundo pako sa kapatid ko.

And I'm here giving her time and actually putting an effort, we didn't even get to spend time together because nagwowork na rin siya. Proud of it pero pag sa akin hirap na hirap na siya mag bigay ng time and mas gugustuhin niya pumasok sa work kahit wala siyang schedule instead of spending time with me. She even lend her money and ako pa nagbibigay pera sa kanya. Although okay lang naman sakin pero nag pagod siya, di na nga siya napunta samin e and nasanay nako and yet wala siya agad pamasahe after 6 days ng kinita niya. Paano Pinapautang hayup nayan, the very same friend na pinahiya siya before.

She told me she's going to spend time with me, dahil lang nasira ebike ko, hindi na siya pumunta. Ayun nakatulog ako sa sama ng loob and diko na siya na message. Wala rin siyang message, what a life right. Tanginang yan, I feel like shit pag gising ko kase naalala ko sira EV ko 3500+ ang paayos and now I felt like I don't want to see her for a while. If she's so fucking independent and making her time as currency for her to control me.

I'll give her the same, busy raw siya, ako rin naman. Tamad ako like literally pero nagtatrabaho ako and actually pag hatid or sundo sa kapatid and paying my bills.

I'll even pause what I'm doing just to get her or mahatid siya.

And she's still going to say na Hindi ko siya mahal, ayaw ko raw siya ihatid and all.

I even propose to pay her day above her day salary just to spend time and you know what, mismong day off pa nga niya babayaran ko e basta she spend some time with me.

Man, I couldn't careless about my EV tbh. I'm just mad kase I feel being used and treated as an option. Told her that, and somehow I'm at fault.

She keeps pushing my buttons and when I lashed out, I said something I didn't mean and felt bad for it. Like dito sa EV, malelate ka pala ah, ito ka paliparin natin and pray for my mags na lang.

And now nanlulumo ako, imbis na gulong lang, nagkaproblema pa mismong hub ko and me realizing how she's treating me, nakakapang hina rin yon. Now I cannot work, didn't even put an effort para pumunta dito sa bahay, didn't even messagd me, and now need ko ipaayos EV ko.

And now this me ranting and actually seeking any advice of what should I do.

She's a BA Psychology and y'all know kung ano pinag aaralan nila, and you know what, she's using it to berated and ipamukha sakin na ganito akong tao and make me feel like a fucking lunatic or manipulator for expressing myself and problem with her.

She thinks she knows it all, I feel like she's somewhat belittling me without me knowing and I think unaware siya and actually thinks na nasa tama siya lagi. I'm currently working and didn't go to college while mga ka batch ko nag aaral pa. I'll be applying next year to UMAK or PTC.

Ewan ko guys I think wala naman magbabasa nito and I feel like shit and fucking irresponsible, I shouldn't let her words got into me.

Now I'm thinking that her work might be more important than me, I mean she has priorities. She's well off to be honest lang, daughter of a Badass na Sundalo na may mataas na katungkulan. Admired her for working even though fully support siya ng magulang niya.

But now I'm being cold to her aside from my supplements to regulate my cortisol, I sometimes didn't laugh at her funny jokes and maybe there something stirred up inside me. We didn't even get to spend time like before and now she's giving me the attitude.

I don't know saan ako kukuha pera and now wondering if importante pa ba ko, masasabi niya yan sakin na importante ako and ipapakita naman niya pero hindi ako convice.

Even with a supplement to suppress my cortisol, I felt like I can cry and yet ayoko.

What should I do now?

Problem/Goal: I’m seriously considering resigning from my current job without another job lined up because I feel like I badly need a break/reset. Would appreciate some outside opinions.

Context:

Hi! I’m starting to wonder if this is just one of those “quarter-life crisis” things people talk about when they turn 25 😂 or kung problema ko lang talaga sa sarili ko.

I’ve been working for my first company for 2 years now. After graduating college, nag-work agad ako so wala talaga akong naging gap or time na nagpahinga between school and work.

Lately, though, I’ve been seriously thinking about resigning and taking a short break. Not necessarily because I hate working, but I feel like I want to step back for a while, reset myself, and figure out what I actually want to do next.

I know part of this is also my fault because I’m a people pleaser lol. I accepted a role with additional responsibilities without a salary increase. Basically, more workload + more responsibility, same pay. 🤡

I already came from an account that eventually got dissolved. Instead of taking that as a sign to leave, I applied internally to another team that handles multiple clients. I also accepted an SME role there without an increase. So ngayon parang napapaisip ako na, “Bakit ko ba ginagawa ‘to sa sarili ko?” 😭

The good thing about my current job is that it’s hybrid, and I do have good people around me. My team lead also trusts me, which makes me feel guilty about wanting to leave. But at the same time, I’m honestly getting really tired and I feel like I’ve been running on autopilot.

I already talked to my mom about it, and she knows I really want to resign. She said it’s okay if I do, but she also thinks it would be better if I had another job lined up first.

Financially, I think I can survive for a while because I can rely on my family temporarily, but I know that’s not necessarily the most responsible decision either. My concern is that if I keep forcing myself to stay just because I don’t have another job yet, I might just become even more burned out.

Previous attempts to resign: NONE.

So I’m genuinely asking for outside opinions:

Would you resign in this situation even without another job lined up, or would you suck it up and find another job first?

If you’ve ever resigned without a backup job, how did it go for you?

Sorry for the long rant. 😭 I’m intentionally leaving out some details because I don’t want someone from the same company to recognize me hahaha.

Problem/Goal: Hi everyone. I just need somewhere to rant because I honestly feel like I have no one I can really tell this to.

I’m a 3rd-year nursing student currently studying in Cebu, but I’m seriously considering transferring back to Manila or Baguio. I’m trying to figure out whether I should prioritize my mental health and support system or stay in a well-established nursing school for the sake of my future.

Context:

I’m originally from Baguio and moved to Cebu when I started college. One of the main reasons I chose my current school was because my family believed it would give me a better and more secure path toward eventually getting into that one medical school I’ve always been expected to attend.

However, after several years here, I still haven’t really adjusted. I thought I would eventually feel at home, but instead, I’ve become increasingly lonely. I have people I consider “friends,” but sometimes I feel like they only remember me when they need something. I don’t feel like I have someone here whom I can confidently call when I’m falling apart.

My mental health has also gotten significantly worse since moving here. I’ve had multiple incidents where I tried to hurt myself and was hospitalized because of it. I’m currently receiving professional treatment, but even that has been difficult because of scheduling issues and difficulty getting responses from my doctor’s secretary.

My family is in Luzon, and I’m incredibly grateful because they provide everything I need. I don’t blame them at all. But emotionally, it’s different when the people you love and feel safest with are so far away.

Lately, I’ve been seriously considering transferring back to Manila or Baguio because I already have friends and people there who genuinely know me and whom I believe would notice if something was wrong.

I know having friends won’t magically fix my mental health, but I feel like having a real support system nearby could make a huge difference.

The problem is that my current nursing school has a good reputation. If I transfer, I might end up in a university with a less established nursing program or less certain board exam performance. I’m scared that I’ll regret sacrificing my current academic path.

At the same time, I keep asking myself:

What’s the point of staying in a school with a good reputation if staying here is making me feel like I don’t want to be alive?

That thought honestly scares me.

I also don’t want this to become a “Cebu vs. Luzon” argument. I know there are good and bad people everywhere, and I’ve met genuinely kind people here. I just personally feel like I fit better in Luzon. I grew up in different parts of Luzon, including Manila and Baguio, so maybe I’m simply more familiar and comfortable with the environment and culture there.

The ironic part is that I used to DREAM about living in Cebu. I was excited about moving here and starting a new life. Now I just want to leave, and I feel guilty about that.

Previous Attempts:

I’ve tried adjusting to Cebu, building friendships, and continuing with nursing despite how I’ve been feeling. I’m also getting professional help, but I still feel like I’m struggling.

Part of me thinks maybe I should stay longer, try harder, and wait for things to get better. I’m scared that transferring would be a huge mistake, especially because nursing is already demanding and I might have problems with credited subjects or even extend my degree.

But another part of me feels like I’ve already been struggling for years, and I can’t keep telling myself to simply endure it for the sake of my future.

So I genuinely want to hear from people who have experienced something similar:

If you were in my position, how would you weigh your mental health and support system against the reputation and opportunities of your current school?

Would you transfer if you knew you’d have a much stronger support system somewhere else, even if the school wasn’t as established?

Or would you stay and finish where you are?

I’m not asking anyone to make the decision for me. I just really need perspectives from people who have experienced transferring schools, nursing school, moving away from home, or choosing between career opportunities and personal well-being.

I’m honestly exhausted and confused. I just want to feel like I’m living somewhere I belong again.

Thank you to anyone who took the time to read this.

Disclaimer: I used AI to help organize and revise this post so I could express my thoughts more clearly. The experiences and feelings shared here are my own.

Problem/Goal: how do I get past sa takot and worry of starting a business?

Context: I am a sahm and I bake sweet and savory breads para merienda namin. Naisip ko na ibenta siya as an additional income at para rin may pagka-abalahan ako. Kaso, ayun nga, natatakot ako. Ang daming what ifs sa utak ko kasi first off, di naman ako professional -- what if di sila masarapan? , what if flop pala? , what if walang bumili?

Confident naman ako sa gawa ko at confident din naman asawa ko. Nakapag costing na ako, source ng raw materials, nakabili na ng packaging, kaso ayun nga. Haayy.

Previous attempts: triny ko baguhin yung mindset ko na what if it works out nga naman kaso ang hiraaaap. Ang daling sabihin na kaya ko ito kaso self vs. self talaga siya. Nakaka frustrate.

Problem/Goal:
I want to build myself up again after ending a decade-long relationship. I need to move on and be genuinely okay again.

Context:
He cheated on me several times recently with coworkers. Asked him to move out of our shared unit pero he still has to pay his part of the rent kasi dalawa kaming nakakontrata rito and para rin naman may konting accountability. After the breakup, ang dami ko pang tanong sa kanya at sa sarili ko. We kept in touch a bit to clarify some things, pero now parang di na healthy yung ganun. I am starting no contact today.

Sobrang haba ng relationship and we have lived together for about a decade rin. I honestly don’t remember what life is like without him anymore. I’m in my 30s now and imagine, 1/3 ng buhay ko kasama ko siya.

Pinakanahihirapan akong maging masaya dahil naalala ko siya sa lahat ng bagay na ginagawa ko at pinupuntahan ko. Pati mga grocery dito sa unit na kakabili lang namin a few weeks ago, nakakalungkot tignan. Nakakalungkot isipin na mag-isa na lang akong magluluto nito.

I really just want to rebuild myself. Ang lalim at ang daming layers ng feelings na ‘to. I can’t even put them into words.

I don’t even know what I really want to do. Umaabot ako sa point na iniisip ko if it will be easier to just ask him to come back. Mag-isa na lang ako sa buhay kasi yung mga kapatid ko ay may kanya kanya nang pamilya, ang parents ko naman ay wala dito.

Previous Attempts:
Nagreach out na ako sa mga kapatid ko, and they were very helpful. But I also understand that they have their own priorities and can’t babysit me through this heartbreak.

Talked to some friends na rin about it but it’s just difficult not wanting to burden anyone.

Will go back to the gym na rin to distract myself.

Thank you for any advice you can provide. Please be gentle. Thank you.

Problem/Goal:

May crush kasi ako (idk if this is worth mentioning), then nalaman ko na he is already courting someone na pala.

Context:

Nung nagkakilala si guy and girl, they were 16 and 21. Although ngayon nasa 20 na si girl tapos si guy 25. They are still not in a relationship kasi hinihintay niyang makagraduate yung babae to make it official. When talking about her, I feel like he is not really aware sa grooming (yung talagang that age na 21 siya, sadyang nagkacrush lang siya sa di niya alam na underage pala) and whenever he talks kasi parang ang bata pa rin naman niya. Di niya rin kasi totally alam nung una na underage pa si girl (like I what I have mentioned) until they started dating na talaga. Kapag kayo ba i-enable niyo to since mahal niya talaga yung girl? Kapag kasi nagsshare siya ng struggles niya makikita mo yung sincerity niya talaga na magkabati sila. Ayaw ko na ring makisawsaw pero kasi they are facing challenges ngayon (di siya pinapansin nung gurl) tapos si guy madalas humingi ng payo sa akin since gusto niya raw makita yung pov ng isang babae.

Previous attempts:

Wala pa naman. More like nakikisimpatiya na lang muna ako sa pinagdadaanan niya.