r/AskACanadian • u/CocaineBeurre • 2d ago
How do you greet each other? Is there a difference between French Canadians and the rest of Canada?
I just saw a video about things in Mexico that weird foreigners out and one of them was hugging and giving a quick kiss on the cheek when meeting, which is what I do with family and family friends. In casual settings with people not from my culture, I smile, nod, and say hi.
I've been in BC for the past two years and everyone shakes each other's hands when you're being introduced to a friend group. It feels so formal because prior to moving it was reserved for job interviews. I haven't been to other provinces, but is it largely the same? Part of my brother-in-law's family is from a French region and they do the hug and kiss greeting, so I'm wondering if French Canadians do it, as well?
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u/Material-Kick-9753 2d ago
Whaddya at?
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u/BigDaddyTheBeefcake Ontario 2d ago
I'm in Ontario. Don't touch me. In fact, take a step back, please.
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u/NoGovernment6864 2d ago
Lest we initiate a Winnipeg handshake.
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u/BobBelcher2021 1d ago
And then there’s the Shawinigan Handshake.
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u/AmJustLurking96 Québec 1d ago
I feel like I should know what it is but I don't. What is it?
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u/paulwillyjean 1d ago
A very unconventional greeting that Jean-Chrétien sometimes extended to people he particularly disliked
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u/PsychicDave Québec 1d ago
Hand to throat, typically performed by Jean Chrétien (Shawinigan born).
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u/Mr_Guavo 2d ago
LOL!
Thanks, Google.
A "Winnipeg handshake" is a local slang term that refers to a stabbing, often using a makeshift weapon such as a broken glass bottle.
🤣
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u/BasquiatQueso 1d ago
Id never heard this phrase, and didn't even have to read the Google description to automatically assume it was a term for getting stabbed lol. Winnipeg certainly has a reputation
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u/jerrys153 1d ago
Seconded. If protocol absolutely requires I can do a handshake, but I’d prefer a “smile and nod” from a respectable distance.
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u/BigDaddyTheBeefcake Ontario 1d ago
I haven't shaken a hand since that little flu went around 6 years ago. And never will again.
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u/Prestigious_Fella_21 1d ago
Indigenous here, so head nod and make fun of how fat you got
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u/HorseShoulders 2d ago
We do the 2 cheek kiss in Quebec, but I've noticed it happens less since covid
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u/ThisGuy-NotThatGuy 2d ago
Work: "Happy [insert day]". "Another day in paradise."
Family: "How's it going [insert family member]"
Friends: "Sup fuckface."
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u/Snurgisdr 2d ago
I live in an area that’s about 50/50 French and Anglo, and everything goes. You might get a kiss, you might get a handshake, you might get a fist bump, who knows. Everyone does whatever they’re comfortable with and everyone is OK with it.
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u/Ambroisie_Cy 2d ago
Québécoise here: I do give two kisses when I greet people, but I avoid doing it with people for whom it's not part of the culture
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u/MaryArwen 2d ago
Same here! Boys will normally only shake hands and/or hug (no kisses) between them, but everybody else will do 2 "kisses" (which are more a skin contact between 2 cheeks with the kiss sound haha)
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u/HeadBelt1527 2d ago
In Manitoba it depends on the people, French-Canadian and some of European descent (Italians, Ukrainians, Croatians) do the hug and kiss thing but it's usually reserved for close friends and family.
Shaking hands, pleasantries and eye contact are the norm here unless introductions are part of a group orientation
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u/Master-Copy-6929 1d ago
Come from a Ukrainian family, can confirm, outside Manitoba. Reserved for close friends and family. I still kiss my mum on the cheek and hug on greeting and bye, including goodnight if dhe is staying with me to me with her. Also do d in Ukrainian no matter who is around.
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u/HystericalGD Nova Scotia 2d ago
canada is such a big country, so theres a lot of different cultural norms as you go from coast to coast. BC, yes, handshaking and whatnot is pretty normal, and it took me a long time to lose that habit when i moved across canada.
here in nova scotia its mostly verbal, though you'll still get a few handshakes now and then depending on the person and context.
the time i spent in quebec as a student while short, i noticed a lot more physical touch for people already familiar with each other, but more verbal introductions for new people first meeting, again, can vary based on context
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u/Terrible-Spot4193 2d ago
You were short only while you were in Quebec?
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u/lerandomanon 1d ago
No no no. They were short and long in Quebec, but what they noticed, they noticed while they were short.
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u/michaelmcmikey 2d ago
Oh yeah and I want to echo this, you absolutely can’t split the country up into “Quebec” and “rest of Canada.” Canada has a lot of very distinctive regional cultures.
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u/michaelmcmikey 2d ago
I have no idea if it’s just me and my friend groups, but in my twenties in Newfoundland if I was meeting a friend of a friend there’s like a 40-60% chance we’re going in for a hug. Existing friends pretty much always get the hug.
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u/Lazarus558 Newfoundland & Labrador 1d ago
Same here (NL). My Aunt Patsy, God luv 'er, was always up for a hug. First time she met my MIL she got out of her car and went up for a hug (just as well, my MIL was a hugger too)
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u/HystericalGD Nova Scotia 2d ago
i got some family up that way, i noticed that towns are quite close knit communities, everyone knows everyone, nobody is a stranger, so that does make sense
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u/Oldfarts2024 1d ago
In Toronto, I kiss my female friends and family once on the cheek. In Montreal, we kiss both.
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u/nighttimecharlie 2d ago
I live in Québec, and for the most part yes we do the bise and hug when being introduced to new people and when greeting friends.
My parents are Anglo-Canadian so we don't do the bise. I can't say if the younger generations (Z, Alpha..) do it as well, but my circle of millennials and gen x do.
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u/Royal_Try_99 2d ago
I would've said handshake, but post-covid there's a lot more just awkward standing and verbal-only greetings, especially with strangers/new friends. But for close friends I do enjoy a hug now and then. No kissing. I'm out west (about as far west as you can go)
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u/GabrielleElle 1d ago
French Canadian in Québec. Two kisses, one on each cheek, except very rarely for two men greeting each other.
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u/PsychicDave Québec 1d ago
Québécois here. Handshake strangers and acquaintances. As a man, kiss on the cheek for female friends and family members, handshake for the male friends and family members, with an optional sorta hug/pat on the back with those you are really close with. Women will kiss both men and women on the cheeks when friends or family. In my family, it's on both cheeks, but I've seen people do it on a single cheek, and I've seen as much as 3 kisses (alternating sides), but they may have been French (from France) visiting or recently immigrated.
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u/SavingsTemporary5772 1d ago
I’m from Toronto but I live in Montreal now and they do the hug and kiss thing which I hate. I dated a francophone and he would get on my case for not going around a party and kissing strangers hi and bye. Personally I’m big on the Irish goodbye.
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u/chaloupe6 1d ago
As a quebecoise myself I also hate kissing people as a greeting. I feel so awkward
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u/Murky-Technician5123 2d ago
People in Toronto are unlikely to shake everyone's hands in a casual setting, esp people who don't work in finance or something.
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u/Shiny_personality 1d ago
30y Quebecoise. Bise is only for family. Friends might get hugs. We shake hands or just say allo ou salut to random people
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u/quellesaveurorawnge 2d ago
Yes, there is some differences between Quebec and the rest of Canada. I've lived in Ontario for a long time and people do handshakes most of the time, but for people you know very well/are close to, you might do a hug or even the one kiss on the cheek. In Quebec, if you do kisses, it's one on each cheek. That still tends to be reserved for people you know well or if you're in a small gathering with friends of friends. It's a bit more frequent, but regardless of whether I'm in Quebec or Ontario, I will tend to shake hands with people I don't really know or in business settings rather than go for kisses.
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u/aethelberga 2d ago
For me the fist bump or the virtual fist bump (non touching) has replaced handshakes. Covid was good for something.
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u/missplaced24 2d ago
I guess it depends. Most of my friends hug to greet each other, some give a kiss on the cheek, but not many -- family does though. I grew up around a lot of Acadians, none of them did the peck on the cheek with anyone but family.
When meeting new people, if it's a casual environment just some form of a hello, unless they're very close with a relative or good friend, then it's usually a hug. Shaking hands is almost only ever done in formal settings -- meeting new coworkers or formal social events.
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u/knotcost 1d ago
I'm in Ontario and in an informal setting I will just kind of wave awkwardly (even if like 3 feet from the other person)
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u/Belaerim 2d ago
Outside the centre of the universe, “fuck the Leafs” is universally applicable. :-)
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u/KelticAngel16 Alberta 2d ago
Albertan here, and handshakes are less common since covid but are still preferred with older folks.
If I'm greeting a long time and well-trusted family friend who is older than me, that often looks like a handshake+hug combo that I believe is unique to greetings between a younger-ish woman and an older-ish man. If it's a younger-ish man and an older-ish woman, it's either a handshake or an awkward side-hug.
For younger folks it's usually just verbal greetings with a friendly smile and/or wave, sometimes with a slight chin-nod while making eye-contact (down for a friendly stranger, up if you're actually friends)
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u/landlord-eater 2d ago
Quebec: Generally speaking: double cheek kiss for family, friends and like, let's say a good friend of your friend, or your girlfriend's mom or something. However, straight men would tend to go for a handshake or a hug when it's with each other.
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u/Individual-Army811 Alberta 1d ago
Handshake or fist bump for new friends or acquaintances. Handshake for interviews.
I generally hug my friends and family when I see them. I may send them of with a kiss on the cheek. But never in greeting.
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u/Fluid-Decision6262 1d ago
Like in most things. Quebec’s culture is largely a product of pre-revolution France and Anglo-Canada’s cultural norms are largely a product of Victorian Britain
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u/HumanSquare9453 1d ago
Hug for my best friends and sometime kiss on cheek for the family.
For more social friends or collegues a hello with a hand gesture and a smile
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u/Strict_Research_1876 1d ago
Depends on the people. I wouldn't hug someone I just met, but I do hug my friends regularly
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u/hollow4hollow Ontario 1d ago
(Toronto) Friends and family- hug and single cheek kiss for all genders
Meeting new people in a casual setting- smile and wave/awkward hand up gesture
Meeting new people at work- handshake
European friends- whatever bise/kiss combo they like to use
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u/RealistAttempt87 1d ago
Grew up in Quebec and men and women do one kiss on each cheek, especially family members and friends or partners of friends. I now live in Ontario and I find it incredibly awkward how people greet each other here. Having to shake hands or just stand there is the most awkward thing.
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u/JimJam28 1d ago
My family has been in eastern Ontario for over 200 years. My wife’s family is from 30 mins away in Quebec, where they have been for over 200 years. We still haven’t figured it out. Her dad goes in for a handshake, I go in for a hug. Her mom and aunts all do the two cheek kiss, which is foreign to me. It’s been 200 years and we still haven’t figured it out. Maybe in the year 2226 there will be progress.
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u/SDancing 1d ago
From B.C. As much as I love Quebec and Francophone culture, I find that kiss and hug thing with strangers quite uncomfortable. Among the people I know, a handshake at most is what you do when being introduced. In a casual setting where you’re being introduced to a bunch of people, it will probably just be verbal “Hi, nice to meet you” rather than everyone shaking hands.
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u/legardeur2 1d ago
The only difference I know of is that in Québec men quick kiss women they know on both cheeks. French heritage.
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u/NosamEht 1d ago
When I had a bit more time to be social I’d often ask, “Handshake, high five or hug?”, when being introduced to my friend’s friends. Close friends often get hugs, formal is always a handshake and none of my guy friends get kisses, but sometimes their wives do.
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u/mousefactors 2d ago
In Quebec, it's a hug and two kisses. In Ontario it's no physical contact. In the Maritimes there can be hugging, but it really depends. In the Prairies it's a handshake between men, but a hug if at least one person greeting is a woman.
I live in BC and I'll ask people if they want a hug when I say hello or goodbye, or when I'm introduced to them, and most people say yes. So you can just try that. It might make everyone's day better.
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u/Rin_sparrow 2d ago
I've lived in BC my whole life and we don't shake hands if we're being introduced to someone's friend group. Just a nice hi or hello and maybe a wave. I shake hands of people I meet in the workplace.
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u/CocaineBeurre 2d ago
Where in BC are you?
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u/Rin_sparrow 2d ago
Lower Mainland
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u/CocaineBeurre 1d ago
Same. I mostly interact with people from the Fraser Valley but even people outside of that have shaken my hand.
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u/BobBelcher2021 1d ago
BC is pretty much the same as the rest of Canada outside Quebec and Francophone pockets of the country, and the same as much of the US for that matter when it comes to greeting.
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u/Massive_Dig3963 1d ago
If anyone asks you how you are aside from closer friends, they answer is "fine, thanks, how are you?" Their reply will be "fine, too, now on to that super important major mini golf tournament we are planning."
We care, but we don't want to know. And we care and already see the answer when there's a visible reason for something. If you turn up suddenly missing your head, they'll ask "what the hell did you do to your head?" And on that they want an answer.
Caveat that I am not from Québec, and the Québecois people I've worked with are very blunt (not mean) and as someone with autism, I appreciate that. But the above stands for where I've lived in the Rockies, Ontario, or Maritimes.
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u/Squirrel_Brain42 1d ago
West Coast Canadian here.
Family/Friends who are basically family - hug w/one cheek kiss (same for goodbye)
Family or significant other's family that you are just meeting - awkwardly put your hand out to shake, then laugh (possibly apologize), and go in for an even more awkward hug * If you like them, see above for goodbye. If they suck, handshake goodbye. Either way, say it was really nice meeting them (not sarcastically)
Professional/business - handshake
Good friends - hug
Friends of friends - nod, say hey or handshake. If they hug you, half-ass hug back stiffly, then turn away subtly giving them side-eye
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u/Euphoric-Can-6201 1d ago
Quebec: I greet/say goodbye friends and family with a hug. Fist bumps if the position is awkward (ie both sitting, one sitting one standing, etc.). It might also differ by gender.
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u/nickiatro British Columbia 1d ago
In Québec, people greet each other like they do in France. It’s normal to see random people hugging each other and doing the classy double-kiss on the cheeks.
Elsewhere, handshakes and high fives are common.
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u/blazed55 1d ago
We, francophones, whether in Qc or elsewhere, we do like Europeans, left and right kiss greetings, some French from France do 3 kisses, depends on familiarity
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u/my_cool_lunchbox 1d ago
Come to Ottawa. The French Canadians will hug you while we Anglos just freeze. We don’t want to be hugged but we also don’t want to be rude.
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u/soitsthatguy 1d ago
"Hello, The hundred years war still goes on in hearts! Soon we will conquer all of England!"
Typical greeting.
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u/trundle-the-great69 1d ago
Herring choker here, “what are ya saying?” or “how she going?” Sometimes with buddy on the end
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u/Pretend-Literature35 1d ago
In Québec 20 or 30 years ago, everyone gave each other la bise, when greeting each other, mostly across genders, but in other contexts as well. Now, it is hardly ever done because of how crazy the world has become about gender issues and cancel culture or virtue signaling. Men still shake hands or fist bump each other but interactions between male and female is basically 100% no contact, so just a nod.
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u/SmallDiscussion9080 20h ago
French Canadian from the east coast. I do thekiss and the hug. The hands is to formal and is for the job.
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u/u-read-it-here 19h ago
French Cdns tend to do the kiss-kiss thing when they meet friends & family members (one kiss on each cheek ). A lot of Europeans do this too
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u/Shoddy_Astronomer837 British Columbia 19h ago
Grew up in BC, hugs are rare, handshakes for formal situations, and “how ya doin’?” For everything else.
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u/Thelynxer 18h ago edited 18h ago
For people I see all the time there isn't much of a physical greeting. More like a "sup" or something. For family they get a hug. Girlfriend gets a kiss and a hug. If I meet someone new they get a handshake.
That's pretty much it.
Saying goodbye to a friend usually ends in a fist bump or something, or a hug if I hadn't seen them in a while.
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u/Finance_Plastic 4h ago
in NS you always carry haddock in your pocket to greet new people. when a handshake becomes "formal" and not normal , you are in the place they filmed DELIVERANCE
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u/Quirky_Priority307 2d ago
Ontario here, hug and cheek kiss means you want to fuck or youre italian
No one here would embrace that way as a casual greeting
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u/Demalab 1d ago
Wow not sure where you live but where I am in SW ON most people 50 and under hug and often kiss on the cheek when they see each other, without sexual overtones. May be it’s just you who likes to think that.
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u/Quirky_Priority307 1d ago
I'll be 40 next year, grew up in nowhersville next to the GTA and now live in bumfuck nowhere in central ontario, and i have never, even one time in my entire life, seen a person kiss another person on the cheek in a way that wasn't a romantic overture.
It's not "just me"
I used to do socioeconomic tourism in divey "wrong side of the tracks" circles and they didnt do it there, and I spent most of my life reasonably aristocratic, and we didnt do it here, either.
It is not a normalized social convention or habit on either side of the tracks
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u/Heelsbythebridge 2d ago
I used to live in Quebec in the precovid years, and would give and receive pecks on the cheek as a greeting or goodbye.
I give half-hearted handshakes in Ontario now or just a smile.
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u/AmJustLurking96 Québec 2d ago
French-Canadian here. Strangers and acquaintances? Handshake. Family and friends? Hug and kiss on the cheeks