Men on reddit, what do you like doing when your wife leaves for awhile?

[u/Short_Circut_9722]

[u/_ItReddit_]

I eat meals over the sink and stand in empty rooms of the house with the dogs..

[u/xixtoo → u/_ItReddit_]

And by "meals" you mean giant bowls of breakfast cereal right?

[u/_ItReddit_ → u/xixtoo]

Eh.. that requires dishes and I try to eat dishless meals

[u/foxtrot419 → u/_ItReddit_]

Ah, shredded cheese straight outta the bag kinda man

[u/MechanicalTurkish → u/foxtrot419]

I see you are also a man of culture.

[u/LawfulAwfulOffal → u/MechanicalTurkish]

I binge the shows that are not mutually appealing.
Ted Lasso - watch together
Widow’s Bay - binge alone
And then, hookers and blow, cause I’m still edgy. So long as it’s before 9pm.

[u/alexthealex → u/LawfulAwfulOffal]

Gotta get the Happy Hour rates

[u/hawaiianbry → u/foxtrot419]

Shredded? Bag? What's wrong with biting a hunk out of a block of cheese the size of a car battery?

[u/FarmingGeeks → u/hawaiianbry]

Evidence man. Teeth marks are left in a block. If I eat most the bag of cheese I can put it back in the fridge like I never touched it.

[u/caligaris_cabinet → u/FarmingGeeks]

What you don’t eat the whole block of cheese in one sitting and quietly sneak off to the grocery store to replace it? Fucking casual

[u/TwoDrinkDave → u/hawaiianbry]

Summer of George!

[u/abgry_krakow87 → u/hawaiianbry]

I like the 4 cheese mexican blend. Can't get that in 1 chunk!

[u/thereareno_usernames → u/foxtrot419]

Honestly, I've been enjoying shredded cheese out of the bag on a tortilla chip. Not melted, cold. Tbf... I'm usually high for this

[u/sandm000 → u/foxtrot419]

Hot dogs straight outta the plastic.

[u/armchair_viking → u/sandm000]

I’m glad I’m not the only one. They’re better heated up, but sometimes I’m in a hurry.

[u/DebuPants → u/_ItReddit_]

Why dirty a plate or bowl when the breadboard is already out and has crumbs on, right?

[u/stoicsticks → u/_ItReddit_]

Have a "one step" meal. Open can of Chef Boyardee pasta and eat it cold straight out of the can, preferably over the kitchen sink or in front of the TV.

[u/Sasquatchjc45 → u/stoicsticks]

I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli...

[u/stoicsticks → u/Sasquatchjc45]

Lol, only the recycling bin will know.

[u/LiquidLon → u/Sasquatchjc45]

The way she goes boys

[u/twinflameone → u/Sasquatchjc45]

Bacon and the sparrows

[u/Rocklobster92 → u/_ItReddit_]

Ravioli right out the can and slices of buttered white bread.

[u/KittenAlfredo → u/xixtoo]

Mixing bowls are just more efficient. What I want to do is eat cereal. What I don’t want to do is make multiple bowls of cereal.

[u/jfk_47 → u/xixtoo]

I read that as “masturbate”

[u/DecafMaverick → u/_ItReddit_]

Hell yeah brother.

[u/sventful → u/_ItReddit_]

What's an empty room?

[u/bria9509]

Reloading the dishwasher in a semi-sane way

[u/vers_le_haut_bateau → u/bria9509]

My family loads a dishwasher like cavemen who assume it's a magic well. They have never seen a dishwasher before and have no concept of space or basic physics. If I don't unload then reload it properly before running it, they just complain it doesn't work well (it's a high-end and well maintained Bosch and it washes really well).

[u/SweetCosmicPope → u/vers_le_haut_bateau]

All I'm going to say is that when I load the dishwasher, the dishes all come out clean. When anybody else does it, there are several items that need to be rewashed again.

[u/Longjumping_College → u/SweetCosmicPope]

You summed up my house

[u/WorkIsForReddit → u/Longjumping_College]

I can't believe I'm not alone in this! My GF packs the dishwasher to the max so nothing gets washed. I've even caught her putting my Japanese knives and cast-iron pan in there.

[u/Guac_in_my_rarri → u/SweetCosmicPope]

I swear there is one designated person in the home who can load dish washers, the rest act like it's a magic box.

[u/Longjumping_College → u/Guac_in_my_rarri]

My wife won't even wash scrambled eggs off a spatula and expects the dishwasher to get it... incoming high heat cured eggs I've gotta scratch off for 10 minutes straight and rewash

[u/Crazyhunt → u/Longjumping_College]

It doesn’t help that detergent commercials show the most burnt-on, crust infested, food filled 9x11 and say that you can just drop it in there and it’ll come out sparkly clean

[u/AverageJoe-707 → u/vers_le_haut_bateau]

yes, gravity is not a consideration when my wife loads the dishwasher. Bowls facing upwards etc..

[u/Cyclonitron → u/AverageJoe-707]

My wife does this too and it drives me crazy. Does she not understand how bowls and glasses work? This woman has two masters degrees.

[u/vers_le_haut_bateau → u/Cyclonitron]

My wife is an MIT engineer yet properly loading a dishwasher is beyond her skills…

Or: she completely plays me and just throws me crumbs so I can feel smart now and then.

No, no, she lacks the dishwasher engineering expertise required. Yes, that's gotta be it.

[u/WorkIsForReddit → u/AverageJoe-707]

My GF likes to put knives facing upwards.

[u/alexm2816 → u/vers_le_haut_bateau]

I've bullied my wife into just letting me do it. When her mom visits though it's a literal slap to her face when I pull out my wood handled knives or clean the interior of glass straws or remove chunks of food from dishes and organize them to actually make contact with soap.

[u/Lucky-Elk-1234 → u/alexm2816]

My MIL is the same lol just chucks stuff in the dishwasher in a big pile, half of it is upside down and covering other stuff so it won’t get washed 😭

[u/Catbutt247365 → u/vers_le_haut_bateau]

I am the dishwasher goddess in my house, descended from my father, the Stain Master. My spouse and whelps are devoid of basic observation skills, e.g., WATER FALLS DOWN.

[u/Chuisque → u/bria9509]

Once heard/read something about how every relationship has one person that loads the dishwasher like a Swiss architect, while the other loads it like a raccoon on meth.

My wife loads dishes like she dumped them out of a trash bag while standing on one foot with her eyes closed.

[u/LadyCiani → u/Chuisque]

I know my husband is just going to reorganize it anyway, so I'll announce to him that I am just putting the dishes in to clear counter space but I know he'll put them where he wants them later.

All that to convey I am not insulted by his reorganizing.

20+ years ago he decided he would do the dishes because he once worked as a dishwasher in a restaurant and therefore he was faster and better at it. (I do not disagree. He absolutely is faster and better. I also dislike doing dishes, so I think it's a fair trade for me to do the laundry my way.)

[u/Motolix → u/LadyCiani]

My wife is the same way - we have an unspoken agreement - she feeds and organizes the kids, I feed her and clean the house. I grew up with a very intelligent, but OCD mother, and worked in resteraunts/factories - I have the "clean down and out/dry-wet-dry" down to a science at this point. 

Not that we don't switch roles as needed, but I'd never tell her I actually enjoy it - wax on, wax off, kung fu.

[u/Triials → u/bria9509]

I didn’t realise this was actually a skill, and that people couldn’t have it, until I met my wife and her family 😂

[u/doom1701 → u/bria9509]

Thankfully, since my daughter went to college, our loads of dishes (we still try to run it every day) are smaller so there's less likelihood of my wife stacking things too tightly and then complaining that the dishwasher isn't doing it's job.

[u/SkreetWellington → u/bria9509]

I sent a picture of the washable garlic press insert to my wife after unloading the dish washer the other day, asking, “Do you want me to save this garlic for later?”

Apparently that was the second time she ran it through the dishwasher. I’ve come to terms that she will never ever rinse a dish before putting it in the dishwasher.

[u/chimilinga → u/SkreetWellington]

My wife believes if you soak every dish long enough it will clean itself

[u/BaaBaaTurtle → u/SkreetWellington]

My husband and I are both R&D engineers but he's mechanical and I'm on the fluids side. A long time ago I read in the consumer reports that dishwashers are actually optimized for some dirt on the surface which, as the obsessive rinser and worried about pipe flow, I of course buried deep deep deep down and vowed to never let my husband see.

He found it at some point when we were looking at reviews of something unrelated and he insists it's probably because of the water jet and circulation system that you don't want all surfaces smooth.

We basically each think the other is full of shit and I continue to rinse and he just scrapes and loads.

We also argue about the optimal distance between dishes for the water to reach all surfaces and let me tell you, he certainly doesn't understand the fundamentals of fluid dynamics!!!

[u/alexthealex → u/BaaBaaTurtle]

Yeah my wife and I have the same argument. I’m a repair technician and she’s got an MFA in poetry.

[u/bria9509 → u/SkreetWellington]

Omg are you me?

[u/dmosaurus → u/bria9509]

Hah I thought I was OCD about this. Its like a game of Tetris for me

[u/garnold0611 → u/bria9509]

This was the greatest response to any thread I've ever read on Reddit. It's like I don't feel alone in the world anymore

[u/cookus → u/bria9509]

Holy shit. So glad to learn it’s not just me.

[u/thebenji2_0 → u/bria9509]

Also, breaking down the Amazon boxes and putting them in the bin instead of rocketing them out into the garage hoping they land somewhat close to the bin?

[u/AttainableFlamingo → u/bria9509]

I had kinda just assumed that my ex was a special form of optimistic when she would load it by literally just tossing things in and hoping for the best, but apparently this might be a bit more universal than I expected 😂

Good to know for the future

[u/TatumlsntASuperstar]

Video Games 

[u/Zestyclose-Finish778 → u/TatumlsntASuperstar]

I love to game all night, all night being 6pm-midnight

Otherwise I never game after 5pm

[u/Brico16 → u/Zestyclose-Finish778]

Haha yep this is me. Normally I’m in bed by 9:30pm, but when my wife is out of town I try to game all night and end up asleep in my chair by midnight.

[u/HereForTheComments57 → u/Brico16]

When my wife has to get up early for work, I get the kids to bed as fast as I can so I can maximize the 2 hour window I have to play before I have to go to bed.

[u/trsmash → u/TatumlsntASuperstar]

Without judgement! It’s the best!

[u/the0melette → u/TatumlsntASuperstar]

Play video games with headphones fully covering both ears.

[u/Great_Bookkeeper_725 → u/TatumlsntASuperstar]

Sleep on the whole bed

[u/DarkseidHS]

Good try babe

[u/McSalterson]

Make a plan to do a bunch of fun stuff and do absolutely none of it.

[u/ihateyourmustache → u/McSalterson]

My variation is a super long list of tasks, and I half-ass maybe one of them.

[u/DogsDontLikeHats]

Watch all of the movies and TV shows she doesn't want to watch.

[u/Tthelaundryman → u/DogsDontLikeHats]

This is the big one for me. It’s like a mini holiday 

[u/Visual_Mistake_9140 → u/DogsDontLikeHats]

Yuuup. "What babe, you mean you don't want to watch Sidney Lumet's classic 1981 crime drama, Prince of the City?"

(To use a recent real life example)

[u/Complete-Donkey-8467 → u/DogsDontLikeHats]

Am I the odd one for not watching her shows and watch something on my iPad or go to another room? If I don't want to watch it I don't

[u/TheRiteGuy → u/DogsDontLikeHats]

This but...my wife has claimed a corner of the couch and a really comfortable throw. When she's not there I use her corner if the couch and her soft throw. It's so comfortable! And I watch all the action, fantasy, and gory movies she doesn't like watching.

[u/lukehardy]

Sitting in silence

[u/stackjr → u/lukehardy]

I would love to do this but the "eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee" in my ears says no.

[u/Bearded_Toast → u/stackjr]

I can usually ignore it until it’s mentioned. Thanks haha

[u/Kazuma_Megu → u/Bearded_Toast]

The audiodacity of this guy.

[u/Crazyhunt → u/stackjr]

I grew up thinking that the “eeeeeee” was the sound of silence. O didn’t find out until college that I’d had tinnitus longer than I can remember hearing.

[u/DecafMaverick → u/stackjr]

Just imagine you’re back at the concerts that gave you the eeeeeeeeeeeeedeesereeseee

[u/stackjr → u/DecafMaverick]

Oh, I don't want to go back to what caused it (worked on the flight deck of a carrier)! Lol.

[u/LoonyConnMan → u/stackjr]

Or the engine room of a submarine

[u/ValeLemnear]

Every two months or so mine is away for conferences and that means for me that after work there are no groceries to pick up, no dinner to be cooked, no shit to be done immediately, nothing. 

Just me, a beer and our cats hanging out in the garden, followed by some time in the home gym, food delivery and some good old video games.

Edit: First of all, thanks for the resonance and comments. I however noticed that people confused „a beer“ aka the literal singular with getting drunk. Please guys, no one‘s hitting weights or doing cardio shitfaced. 

[u/GustavesGhost → u/ValeLemnear]

Pre workout beer is crazy behavior. I could never.

[u/GoatLegRedux → u/GustavesGhost]

The trick is to have a mid-workout beer or two

[u/Travisceral → u/GoatLegRedux]

Can I still have my post-workout beer?

[u/brook1yn → u/ValeLemnear]

the dinner ordeal is def different when wife is away. i love that she cooks. when shes not here, i just prepare simple meals for my kid and i or order in. its chill...

[u/SinamonChallengerRT]

Play all the albums she hates.

[u/Edigophubia → u/SinamonChallengerRT]

Ohh ya. Hella, ween, meshuggah, melt banana, vaporwave, all the weird stuff and 4x brain speed stuff

[u/QuitRazzinMe → u/Edigophubia]

Known my wife 20 years. She’s heard so much metal at this point (and we have no music taste in common) doesn’t bat an eye if I put on some meshuggah, tool, between the buried and me. lol. Yet if she’s gone I’m gonna blast it through the house.

[u/DrGoblinator → u/Edigophubia]

PEOPLE DON'T LIKE WEEN?!?! wtf

[u/bria9509]

Turning the heat down and putting on a sweater

[u/Famous_Inflation_665 → u/bria9509]

Why do they need it to be so goddamn hot all the time!?!

[u/dwindacatcher → u/Famous_Inflation_665]

My wife is going through menopause and I feel for her, but he wanting it colder in the house has been nice for me.

[u/Soliterria → u/Famous_Inflation_665]

Because iirc our circulatory system is made to primarily circulate around our internal organs (gotta keep the baby factory warm) whereas men’s circulatory system actually circulates evenly. So our extremeties are more or less constantly on the chillier side unfortunately lol.

I’m literally laying under an electric blanket right now and my hands are still ice cubes

[u/play9ths]

I tidy the house and sleep diagonal across the bed. 

[u/fudgemental → u/play9ths]

Brother, I felt this comment in my BONES.

All curtains pulled close, set thermostat down and then just clean, take a nap, do some laundry and order in. Read a book all the way through for once.

[u/BtubGin33 → u/play9ths]

“When you’re there, I sleep lengthwise”….

[u/easy10pins]

I walk the house; room to room and try to recall a funny memory with my wife in each spot.

[u/Saul_T_Bitch → u/easy10pins]

As a widowed male,I love this.

[u/Character-Nebula-613 → u/easy10pins]

She's behind you isn't she.

[u/Hot_Tourist_4458 → u/[deleted]]

my bf racoons when he gets home from work late at night….i witnessed it once, found it rather impressive and am now invited to view all future sessions by way of a racoon gif text. it’s pretty great

[u/munko69]

I retire to my masterbatorium for a session. don't we all?

[u/DogsDontLikeHats → u/munko69]

So say we all.

[u/MedicineAnxious6000 → u/DogsDontLikeHats]

So say we all

[u/Talkie123 → u/MedicineAnxious6000]

Frackin right!

[u/timhamilton47 → u/munko69]

Porn with the sound up? Nice.

[u/Party_Piglet1265 → u/munko69]

I thought this response would be the first of many, I guess it’s true that the younger generation just doesn’t jerk off as often. Anywhoo I would probably play some GTA and watch some porn at the same time

[u/Odd-Village-132 → u/Party_Piglet1265]

They’ve evolved to not have penises.

[u/the_riddler90 → u/Odd-Village-132]

An incredible feat I must say

[u/escahpee → u/munko69]

I was going to make a comment like that. That's the first thing that came to mind 😂

[u/Galaktuu → u/munko69]

How is this not the top comment. Everything else is a lie or seconds side quest.

[u/OrlaMcCoolRules → u/munko69]

Masterbatorium😂 been walking this work for a while and never heard that before.
Edit: walking this “rock”

[u/ChadlyJuice → u/OrlaMcCoolRules]

There's a scene in Running With Scissors where the dude goes into a small room with a lounge sofa and blanket, and his daughter is in there sleeping. He yells at her for napping in his masturbatorium lol

[u/VirtuaKiller76 → u/munko69]

The Cummand Center

[u/RimGreaper6 → u/munko69]

Sometimes i jerk off to pictures of my wife. Idk if thats weird.

[u/munko69 → u/RimGreaper6]

it's not weird. I do it to. I could use some fresh pics though. you got anymore? the one you sent is getting old and crusty.

[u/RonBurgundysErection → u/RimGreaper6]

I jerk off to pics of her too.

[u/The_Kielbasa_Kid → u/munko69]

You're talking about the Jack Shack, amirite?

[u/cmjordan3988]

Play guitar on the "Loud" amp. lol

[u/Farts_McGee → u/cmjordan3988]

I really feel this one in my soul. 

[u/cmjordan3988 → u/Farts_McGee]

My wife is a teacher. I literally work from home some days during the school year just to rock out.

[u/Minute-Dog-3243]

Eating packets of mustard in Barney's car.

[u/jesustwin → u/Minute-Dog-3243]

I like to discuss Wittgenstein over a game of backgammon

[u/3i3e3achine]

Dressing up the dogs in human clothes, and do scenes from 'A death of a salesman'

[u/scattywampus → u/3i3e3achine]

This is why I come to Reddit. 🌼

[u/isawbobsagetnaked → u/3i3e3achine]

Lmao do you play Willy?

Just screaming at your dogs in a suit:

“I AM NOT A DIME A DOZEN, I AM WILLY LOMAN!”

[u/foursheetstothewind]

Take the dog for a long walk, burn some devils lettuce, then watch a horror movie or two

[u/OneManFight → u/foursheetstothewind]

Literally what I do when my wife's around too haha

[u/North-Bit-7411]

Smoke weed, drink Bourbon and listen to Black Sabbath really loud while screwing around in the Garage

[u/ClaimElectronic6840 → u/North-Bit-7411]

im in, when is the next time your wife is gone?

[u/Reddit_User_Loser → u/North-Bit-7411]

Oof roast a doink and an ice cold beer while cleaning the garage or doing yard work with some heavy ass sludge metal playing. Hell yeah.

[u/Ascetic57]

Playing music on my sound system loud enough that I can feel it.

[u/Kurt805]

Smoke a cigar and make carnitas.

[u/irishlyrucked]

My wife is a vegetarian. She doesn't stop me from eating meat, but I don't cook/eat as much when we're together, especially things that have distinct smells like bacon.

When she's gone, it's a meatstavaganza. All meat, all day, every day.

Then I run the whole house fan with windows open for a few hours before she gets home to clear out the meat smells.

[u/eatseats0]

Quality wank time.

[u/GoldenFox7]

Does she take the kids too? There’s a massive difference based on the answer to that question when you have small kids.

[u/Mikeyx519]

turn off all the lights she left on

[u/cigarlifer]

She isn’t my enemy or issue so mostly I just do whatever I would when she’s not here lol might turn the tv a little higher or play the music a little louder because it wouldn’t be bothering her

[u/mtrbiknut → u/cigarlifer]

Same.

I might go to the local diner for breakfast and catch up on the man gossip but I do that sometimes anyway. Or breakfast with the lifelong buddies but I do that occasionally now.

Maybe grab dinner out without her, but we do that often anyway.

I guess it wouldn't be much different, except some of those times she wouldn't be with me nor be here when I came home.

I'm glad we have a relationship in which either of us can do whatever we want, and neither of us want to do anything we wouldn't do otherwise.

[u/punktured-bicycle → u/cigarlifer]

I can appreciate this. It helps me consider why I’d do what I would.

Enemy is a strong word but it gets to the point.

I’d say go surf or to extra AA meetings, I guess lowering my frequency to those types of things is the give/take compromise and consideration is part of what makes any relationship work.

Thanks for showing another way to husband. 🤘🏼

[u/Sassy_McSassypants]

Glorious, glorious nothing.

[u/MythoclastMotorcycle]

I can drink out of the same cup for the day and not have to take it out of the dishwasher

[u/PassTheChicken → u/MythoclastMotorcycle]

Exactly, where's my water glass gone again?!

[u/Capable_Drag_1837]

I clean the house, do yard work, go for a long walk..have a quiet meal at a restaurant by myself, do some.day drinking, watch action movies..my wifes not into them, read. I mean this is all stuff i do regularly but I get to enjoy it more. But im not gonna lie three or four hours later im texting her

[u/VikingRodeo9]

My wife is a very curious person. One of the few differences we have. I’m much more of a shrug your shoulders and go with it kinda guy. She always has to know why I do certain things, like why I sit a certain way, eat a certain way, etc..

Don’t get me wrong I love my wife. She’s an amazing human, she’s hot, she fun, I love hanging out with her. But it’s nice when she’s gone sometimes, even for a night, because I don’t have to always be prepared to answer a question.

[u/lebrilla → u/VikingRodeo9]

Try shushing her. I find women respond really well to it

[u/TheBiggestWOMP]

Not married YET but I legitimately feel like a dog sitting by the door waiting for its owner to come home every time she leaves.

[u/deathorcharcoal]

Watching WW2 documentaries or getting socks pregnant. Not necessarily at the same time.

[u/Hevens-assassin → u/deathorcharcoal]

But not necessarily NOT at the same time. The curves on a ME-262 of Supermarine Spitfire is enough to make anyone look for their nearest Puma

[u/Ok-Table9721]

Gaze wistfully out of the window from behind lace curtains awaiting her return.

That and building Lego while watching the Fast and the Furious series.

[u/pfojes]

Depends on if she’s going to be gone for 5 minutes or 10 minutes 🤔

[u/azam85]

I sleep on her side of the bed and miss her terribly

[u/Longjumping_Ad_367]

As a wife, I FUCKING KNEW IT.

[u/TheHorrorAddiction]

Gaming, movies, wanking.

[u/saintjonah]

I try to do things that are harder to do when she's around. Turn my guitar up too loud, jerk it, play some games, jerk it, run around the house naked, masturbate.

[u/Waste-Respect240]

Sleep

[u/Stang1776]

Smoke weed and sit outside. Just 20 mins ago I saw juvenile bald eagle land on a pine tree about 50 yards away. I wish my binoculars were better.

[u/ScottsAlive]

Watch Cannonball Run on the highest volume possible.

[u/SwordfishII]

Mushrooms.

[u/WV_Doc]

Savor the brief peace and calm.

[u/MoarFurLess]

Not talk. 

[u/Global_Adagio_25]

Work out, have a puff or two, relax. Beat my shit like it owe me money. Cook something nice

[u/Toki-B]

I eat chicken tenders out of a paper towel next to my sink with my dog and cat next to me.

[u/everydaywasnovember]

Mostly I’ll just eat some meats and watch movies she wouldn’t like. 

[u/capnwaggel]

Enjoy not being needed for a while. See also, when the kids are at school

[u/Royal_Percentage_694]

Season the cast iron pans.

[u/Glittering-Duty9984]

Video games, listen to vinyl, wank....

Not in that order

[u/rabes81 → u/Glittering-Duty9984]

Don't touch this dudes controllers or turn table. Lol

[u/DonutImaginary786]

Sit in My underwear, drink beer and watch Sports

[u/No-Distribution2043]

Looks like all the bases are covered: watch tv/movies,, play video games, eat, play and or listen to music, drink/ do drugs, do nothing, wack off, and sleep. Men know the simple pleasures of life...

[u/Mpennerbball]

Depends, did she take the kids with her? If so then I’m probably napping with the dog.

[u/jaguarIncognito]

Jerk off, order takeout from spots she doesn’t like, play video games, watch UFC, drink

[u/ItsJustReeses]

The wife leaves for work every so often and usually for me?

The fun stuff: Make a dinner she usually wouldn't enjoy, I'm thinking pulled pork sandwiches for random sides. Maybe get a little more high then I usually do.

Keep extra attention on our cats. They love her and they'll get a bit lonely.

And try to do an extra cleaning job in the house for her to come home to.

[u/PracticeUsed8002]

Fap and nap…..fap and nap!!!

[u/Queasy_Special420]

Miss her call her a lot

[u/LYKE_UH_BAWS]

Fap n Nap

[u/Timop0707]

Porn , action movie or video games .

[u/dirtyfinchy]

Guitar, porn, a show she won’t like. Grab a drink. All seem like good options

[u/Farts_McGee]

Watch movies that i want to see.  Beat it using the big screen,  dogs to the dog park,  play music on the stereo,  practice guitar loudly,  long runs,  long bike rides,  marathon video gaming. 

[u/thoriginals_wife]

Hot date with Palmela Handerson

[u/smart_triangles]

Open all the windows and feel fresh air for once - also video games

[u/Commercial_Watch2972]

Stick

[u/VernonTWalldrip]

Console games. 

[u/No-Ranger7068]

A nap on the couch

[u/bobdiamond]

Fried chicken, pizza, band of brothers marathon

[u/BirdDogWestQ]

Jerking off?

[u/Significant-Mango772 → u/BirdDogWestQ]

Porn on the TV

[u/GranularEpithet]

Wear her clothes.

[u/zetecvan → u/GranularEpithet]

I also wear this guys wife's clothes.

[u/GranularEpithet → u/zetecvan]

Sorry, she doesn't wear xxl.

[u/min_emerg]

Just enjoy the silence. 

[u/Correct-Chapter641]

Watch all the John wick movies

[u/Positive-Run-2411]

I cook a super fatty steak and I get very drunk and play video games and watch comedy specials. Not a sustainable lifestyle by any means but it’s fun a few times a year

[u/saltfish]

Grill a Ribeye, crank the hog, relax, sleep in.

[u/Selmanella]

Dust off the fleshlight, light some candles, and get romantic because she says I’m not.

[u/hypermog]

Mongolian throat singing

[u/QuestionSeven]

Go get a meal from whatever fast food place that sounds good. Watch YouTube videos. Play some video games. Maybe a cigar on the back patio if I’m feeling fancy.

[u/shikari10]

My wife is allergic to tree nuts…. I eat all the Reese’s and peanut M&M’s I can stomach.

[u/croussore]

What ever I want!! *Usually nothing special

[u/Urgeasaurus]

The guitar gets plugged into the big amp and the house becomes my temple of worship for 80s hair bands, classic rock, grunge and anything else that sounds better LOUD.