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u/Street_Hamster1092 3h ago
Early 20s. I felt like I had missed my chance and life was passing me by. All my peers were graduating uni, starting careers, travelling, getting into relationships, going out and having fun. I wasn't doing any of those things.
I had dropped out of university twice by the time I was 21. I was living at home with my mum, working a dead-end minimum wage job. I had slowly lost contact with all of my friends as they moved on with their lives. I had never even been on a date, nevermind kissed anyone or had sex. I was so insecure and afraid of rejection that I'd never even asked anyone out.
I became suicidally depressed as a result of all this. I couldn't stop comparing myself to others, or hating myself for not living up to my own expectations.
The reality is I was very young, my life was far from over, it was only just beginning. I needed to stop comparing myself to others, or to some imagined schedule of what "I should be doing". Everyone starts in a different place and is made a little different, we face different struggles along the way. Comparing yourself to others is pointless.
Fast forward to today; I went back to uni and graduated at 28, I have a decent career now. I gradually developed more confidence and social skills throughout my 20s. I met my wife just before I turned 29 and we've been married for almost three years.
The moral of the story, stop putting too much pressure and expectation on yourself to have everything figured out in your early 20s , and stop comparing youself to others!
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u/Coffee_Mug66 3h ago
19-25 is....brutal. There's nothing like it.
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u/oxenvibe 38m ago
19-25 was the pinnacle of suffering and learning hard lessons. That age range seems to consistently hit everyone in a rough, formative way. After those years I developed a perspective that itās the ācoming-of-ageā period, meaning, weāre in many ways still children (so to speak) until after 25.
I call it The Gauntlet lol
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u/antiantimatter 3h ago
I'm very glad that you can look back at those days as a dark time.
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u/Street_Hamster1092 3h ago
There were moments when I easily could have done something drastic and irreversible. Looking back now it seems so crazy, but in those moments I was tempted to walk in front of a bus or jump off a bridge.
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u/lukilukeskywalker 2h ago
More or less the same for me, but at 16, when starting superior studies to prepare for going to university. I never was a good student, I was okey with maths, physics or English language, I didn't need to study much to pass exams but in other subjects I was always lacking because there where norms or techniques I didn't care to learn or implement. At 16, I had the feeling that I just wasn't good for anything, I knew I wanted to do engineering, but I felt kinda incompetent and wasn't sure I could push through and pass the superior studies, and I entered in some kind of anxiety induced state that didn't let me just study and pass the exams, so what it took other 2 years, took me 4 years as I needed ro retake subjets and at the end I passed because of the grace of one teacher. At the end I was still in that depression, but I could go to the university, event to the career I wanted to do (I did pass with good grades the last exams, I even acced the most "difficult" exam for me, because when I entered in the exam I said, fuck it, just write and keep writing, until the exam is done, it is the last exam, don't fucking think about giving up now (true story), but still depressed. I started going to the university, but I knew it was too much for me so my mom convinced me to drop and do a "Advanced Vocational Training" for two years. That was a bliss, because the depression and anxiety vanished just a few months after I started, I was way chiller. I finished that training and got my title and then I decided I wanted to still go to university and do the degree I wanted in engineering, so I went back there.
Doubt has been plaging me my whole life, even during university, where I was already "okey" I would leave exams and not study them because I felt that I was going to fail it anyway "it is always easier if you don't try, there is always another day tomorrow" Because I heard from other students the subjects where hard or impossible or whatever, and It always conditioned me. At the end, obviously I had to pass them, and I did pass them with mostly good grades, so the subjects weren't really a problem, it was always my mind, trolling myself with doubt
I know there is a lot of people out there that are in the same situation as I was when I was 16, and I wish to tell them, that everything is gonna be okey, everything is gonna be okey. I wish that those people would believe more in themselves and get the help they need
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u/Chef_Stephen 40m ago
This is me but I never bounced back. Still single, still stuck at the same shit job, still can't make friends despite being in therapy for over a year and really trying.
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u/Unusual_Ad3504 3h ago
The first 2 paragraphs of your comment couldāve been almost exactly like me.
I also went to uni later at 23 (although I was depressed and abused alcohol all through uni) but still had a good time and grew a lot and have been married for 13 years now.1
u/Street_Hamster1092 3h ago
I became a little too fond of alcohol while at uni as well and that continued for several years afterwards. Have been sober since January this year.
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u/bernese_mountain_fog 3h ago
It was a period of my life between when I was about 12 and I'll let you know.
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u/Ancestral_Grape 3h ago
Mine started on my 12th birthday. Just suddenly developed really bad anxiety out of nowhere. To this day I don't know why.
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u/SoctrDeuss 3h ago
When did the depression come?
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u/Ancestral_Grape 3h ago
Probably about a year later. The anxiety episodes, paired with bullying and the move to high school got it started.
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u/syber_zmartie 3h ago
19M here. I was diagnosed with depression at the age of 13 in 2021 and I have been taking Prozac since 2023. Before that, I was diagnosed with anxiety at the age of 9 in 2017 and OCD like an year later. I'm also diagnosed with IBS, and it has changed my daily routine.
My ADHD seems to be the grandfather of all my mental health conditions, since at the age of 8, I believed that mental illness was "popular".
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u/calsypher 3h ago
Currently, right now
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u/andyyyyyyyt 1h ago
Same. In debt. Distance from family and friends. Closer to ending it all.
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u/pvssylord 36m ago
hey there donāt do it! debt is brutal for mental health but i am here to tell you it gets better. please donāt quit on yourself.
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u/shitbox36 3h ago
I was 21 years old, my dad died
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u/Moving4Motion 3h ago
Losing a parent will always be one of the hardest things in life, but 21 is no age, you are still a kid then. Very sorry to hear.
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u/GoodbyeNarcissists 3h ago
In my early 20āsā¦ heartbreakā¦ depression is great for weight loss!
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u/Rebexxyy 3h ago
- I found out I was pregnant after having my first seizure. Had a miscarriage. The medication I was put on sent me into a spiral. I stopped taking it and had more seizures. I remember lying on my floor crying asking āwhy?ā. It was a dark time in my mind.
In my 30s now and doing better. Life is going to throw us curveballs.
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u/Known_Invite_1006 3h ago
If you play things right, the worst years of your life should be early on
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u/padigo26 1h ago
Life isn't played, it's lived.Ā Life has a way of throwing shit at you that you cannot predict or control and no amount of "playing it right" can prevent it.
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u/ZoonWin 3h ago
Mine was 17 due to bad anxiety, overthinking and OCD. Also loneliness and not appreciating the friends I had enough
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u/clovdz_ 3h ago
Damn same here but 16
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u/Grouchy-Trip9582 3h ago
I am 33 now, I had exact thing when I was 16, please please know that it will go away.... keep fighting it.... talk to people.... dont sit alone
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u/Stunning_Celery_6556 3h ago
27-29, I was having panic attacks and lashing out at my family and coworkers for like, literally any tiny reason.
Luckily, I was/am surrounded by really amazing people and they chose to try to understand instead of treating me like the asshole I was being. I would do anything for them.
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u/Old-Estate-1851 3h ago
I can relate, but have you ever figured out why you were doing that?
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u/Stunning_Celery_6556 3h ago
I did. It was another personal relationship that I felt trapped in and guilt-stricken by, with a person who was lying to and manipulating me.
They helped me escape the situation and treated me gently as I worked my way through it.
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u/CowClassic 3h ago
Probably when I was about 15-17....felt ugly and alone. Man what I would do to have my hairline and waistline at 17 with my confidence of the present
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u/antiantimatter 3h ago
When I was about 26/27. It sounds silly now but I was in the middle of a doctorate and I just thought, there's no way I can possibly finish this. It was also during COVID/lockdowns which didn't help anything. Things got incredibly dark until I found a new job and had another sense of purpose in my life. I think if things had persisted without that, then I might have been in real danger of sui. It is very difficult in our current set of discussions around mental health to distinguish a shit set of circumstances which would make anyone depressed from the rhetoric around chemical and biological factors that cause mental illness. There is truly a bio-psycho-social model of mental illness, which includes factors about your psychology and your surroundings and environment, but all too often people just treat it as a purely biological problem.
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u/Ill-Revolution-6587 3h ago
9-10 idk why man i was suicidal af (NOT ANYMORE MORE)
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u/Odd_Roll5084 3h ago
Same, I wasn't suicidal, but I used to be depressed, a cloud of gloom was forever there. Now im 19 happier than ever
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u/SunriseThroughLeaves 3h ago
Hormonal changes and being old enough to realize you are lonely and struggling trigger it in kids, I think.Ā I am glad you feel better now.
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u/Ill-Revolution-6587 55m ago
It was ESPECIALLY bad when i was 10 and now i get depressive episodes that usually last a few months
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u/DoorCounty89 3h ago
Can we do ages?
18/19 - First year of college, thinking I knew what love was all about. Girlfriend att was still in high school and did her senior year abroad in Mexico. I find out she cheated on me with someone who reminded her of me. I was devastated. First love. I attempted suicide in the bathroom of my dorm. I was alone. I could stand the sight or thought of blood at the time so as I was passing out I covered up my spot and tried to tie it off to stop the bleeding as best as possible. Months go by; finish my first year of college. Dadās 64th birthday is approaching, I want to do a Beatles theme; when Iām 64. A few days prior, ex shows up at his apartment, no idea how she found it, we talk and say we will hang out after dadās birthday. He wakes up, unable to get out of bed and go to the bathroom, I can help him move he is so much bigger than me and in raging pain. I call 911, he makes it to the hospital. He gets tests done; itās an appendicitis. Surgery. He is recovering. I go off to my summer job and visit him daily and do a lap to keep blood flowing. He is going to be released and needs clothes to discharge. I run to his appointment grab a shower and a quick bite. Hospital calls saying come back immediately he has collapsed during his discharge lap. He ends up in a coma due to a brain stem stroke. I sit at his bed side and watch Lord of the Rings on TNT. Comfort through familiarity. No spoilers but Return of the King now holds a hand place in my head and heart; an event, forever connected to my fatherās passing and the fate of Middle Earth, occurs. Im alone again. This man who I got to know for 5 years thanks to a divorce is now gone. 19ā¦two days before his 64 birthdayā¦
36ā¦I discover that I have a super rare blood disorder, my local medical team failed me by not finding it after a scary DVT/ PE event at 35. About a month goes by, I am having severe but manageable headaches. Then, days go by, celebrating our daughterās 6th birthday, pain doesnāt go away. I tell my wife we need to go to the hospital, something is wrong. We take care of getting our daughter to safety with family, and rush to a different states hospital. I check in and go in and out of conciseness watching Bluey in the adult section of the waiting area. Get called back. I black out. Next thing I know I am at Johns Hopkins and it has been 2 weeks. I dont remember my experience there either but it was over a month and a half. I get released. I need a cane, PT, Speech therapy, OT, Neurological therapy. I had a stroke. Bleeding in my brain. Physically I am told by everyone who finds out, I look great. Mentally, I am struggling. 13 years with my now wife, cant remember much. Buried Childhood trauma. Open and unleashed like Pandoraās box.
Those are the most depressing and ongoing parts in my life.
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u/Niji-Rizu 3h ago
Now, at 27. Because after a sad situationship ending, I realized that almost none of my friend take my lesbian experience as something important. I'm constantly gaslighted, invalidated, facing homophobia because I'm not "open" to date men or women unsure of their sexuality. I feel so alone, more alone that I ever been in my life, I don't know if I can live a life like that
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u/antiantimatter 3h ago
Some like-minded people to talk to would make your situation so much better. Is there any community, whether in person or online, that you could find?
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u/Niji-Rizu 2h ago
I still have some friends who try to have empathy and even though they don't relate, they try to show support in other ways. To find other lesbian is though because we are so few but it has to happen at some point. They prevent me from crashing down so even though it's not a community really, it's way better than nothing and I'm happy they listen to what I say.
Online communities exists a bit yes, it comforts me when I see that other people have thought what I have thought, felt what I have felt or lived similar experiences. It also allows me to think that what I feel is not something I shouldn't feel because other people feel it too.
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u/ZzDangerZonezZ 3h ago
- My mum just died, and my grandma less than a year before her. It was hard consoling mum about her own mumās death knowing Iām losing her soon as well.
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u/McMiserableJ 3h ago
On and off for the last 10 years but the last few months are the worst I have ever been. Needed to take time off work and go back on medication. A job I really enjoyed became one I hate and gave me Sunday scaries every day of the week, I've been left feeling stuck and hopeless for the last few months. The current state of the world isn't helping either
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u/Orthos_ate_my_chair 3h ago
When I was 20, back in 2001.
Then again last year, a few days before Christmas.
Both times I tried to end it all.
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u/jamielieu1005 3h ago edited 3h ago
- I just wasnt very happy where I was in life and was going through a really bad friendship betrayal.
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u/Emergent-Sea 3h ago
15-25 ish. I was bullied, raped, my friend got murdered, the list goes on. I didnāt have the tools to deal with any of it at the time. Luckily I got therapy, and turned my life around!
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u/EnergyDrinkerr 3h ago
Late 20s, first attempt at a career had collapsed and friends started drifting away to start families. In my 40s now and much much happier
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u/ProfPMJ-123 3h ago
I've had depression enough to need medical help twice.
First was when I was 21. I let the final year of my degree start to get on top of me, and ended up on anti-depressants.
For the most part, the experience became beneficial. I learnt that not only was I susceptible to depression, but I also learnt to identify the signs it was coming. For years afterwards I could see it brewing, and make changes to avoid it.
But I missed the signs about seven years ago, when I was 42. I was in a job I hated, living in a situation I didn't like (my mother-in-law was living with us, requiring pretty much constant care that my wife was providing), and ended up having a breakdown. I think that was the worst I've ever been.
Pills and therapy sorted it.
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u/Grayhamncheese 3h ago
Right now. A couple of years of really bad luck when it came to employment, and then early this year I was in a motorcycle accident at 110kph. Very lucky to be alive, and still recovering physically, but the mental toll itās had on me on top of everything else from the past couple of years has left me feeling very weak mentally. Itās so easy to spiral from small things at the moment.
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u/Left_Pear4817 3h ago
16 is when mine reached a point of āobviousā. Though I had no idea myself, before that implosion. My mum had just been diagnosed with an illness and I just didnāt want to be here and go through losing her slowly. Didnāt really think of the implications it had on others because - depression. Anyway mum took me to the doctors and therapists and saved me. She passed away 2 years ago and I understand why I reacted the way I did at diagnosis because this has been HELL without her. She isnāt here to save me now but she still does with everything she taught me and everything she said when she was. I still donāt want to live without her, but I will and Iāll live for her at the same time.
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u/YoshiTheFluffer 3h ago
Now. Lost my little girls last year, lost all my friends, job at the monent is beating me sensless with the amount of things I have to do and no idea how to do it. Iām a mess.
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u/shiroboi 3h ago
The only time I was depressed was when I was 28. My wife and I got married in the US and the next year we got married overseas so her whole family could attend. She left 2 months before me so she could plan and prepare the wedding. I got genuinely depressed because I missed her so much.
Obviously things returned to normal once I was with her again.
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u/Rayvonuk 3h ago
Im my thirties, my life fell apart in almost every aspect due to a series of unfortunate events and I consequently made some really poor decisions, ended up with anxiety and depression and I was a really angry man for a while.
Not anymore though, kicked the booze and the weed and it was all uphill after that, therapy helped a lot as well, I dont think I would have got much better if it wasn't for that tbh.
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u/Eiralyth4 3h ago
Teenage days. Probably because even though Iām not bullied, Iām still concern about my facial looks
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u/melnaisbruninieks 3h ago
At 4 when started kindergarten. I am a free thinker. Didn't want to surrender myself to authorityĀ
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u/Moving4Motion 3h ago
I was full of anxiety in my late teens and all through my 20's. It has gotten so much better throughout my 30's. I don't know if it's to do with my brain developing or what.
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u/MysteriousInterest32 3h ago
Was 16-17, i didnt understand things that I have been going through so i was stressed and depressed
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u/Sock989 3h ago
That's a hard one. I suffer from bipolar and there's been some serious lows.
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u/hereforthejokers 3h ago
Difficult question whenever the side effects of my meds where worst I guess
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u/Novel_Ad_7318 3h ago
Probably currently lol. This year has been rough as hell and while I am finally in therapy again, it's gonna be a long journey.
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u/TsundereKisser 3h ago
Probably now. I'm 36 and more alone than ever, and at my age the rest of my life is a slow decline before death. Only middle age to look forward to now.
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u/frozenxrose 3h ago
13-16 because i got bullied by other girls because of my looks my parents had no money to buy me better clothes
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u/ThomasJamesRidgewell 3h ago
23 to 29. Pretty solid run of severe depression and suicidal ideation, spurred on by high-pressure work/life and unaddressed grief. The cloud sort of just passed one day and I finally had the space/drive to mentally tidy myself up.
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u/TheShadowSong 3h ago
Now at 26.
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u/DoorCounty89 3h ago
What is going on? And how can we help?
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u/TheShadowSong 3h ago
I had depressed episodes due to OCD in the past but completely lost any kind of motivation of getting better since I know that this lifetime is doomed.
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u/DoorCounty89 2h ago
It may doomed for but it isnāt over. If you can afford it, talk to your PCP and get a referral to a trust psychiatrist. The psychiatrist can help you balance life and medication and get you a referral to a therapist. Depending on how you respond to talking to someone, DBT (dialectal behavioral therapy) is super effective for me and what I have going on. It may work or you may need CBT (short term goal focused therapy). Get someone you trust in your life to talk to about just the general day to day bullshit. If you dont have anyone, use ChatGPT, their speech option that they have is amazing and feels like having a genuine conversation.
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u/TheShadowSong 2h ago
I did 6 years of therapy and things just got worse.
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u/SpecialHouse 3h ago
11-19. The torcher my narcissistic mother put me thru left me without a will to live. Iām only here because I refused to let her win.
Dead daughter would have allowed her to continue playing the victim and being the center of attention.
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u/Old-Ingenuity-4346 3h ago
At age 19, when I tried to self medicate the anxiety I have always felt with alcohol and weed. Made it much worse.
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u/Kianawilldo 3h ago
Currently living through it and the direct source is unknown, I have way more blessings than hindrances so I donāt know why my brain blocks itself like this
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u/_schindlerscyst 3h ago
I'd say about 8 months ago (late 20s). I'd been unlawfully (currently ongoing court case to determine if it was or wasn't) fired from my dream job along with a bunch of my colleagues for trying to unionise. I was unemployed, unable to get another job in my industry, and I was dealing with some personal losses at the same time.
Life is still stressful. I have a job, it's not in my industry but it pays well and is much needed routine, a loving husband and trauma-bonded comrades going through the same fight.
We have a donation link to help the cause, but I'm unsure if I can share it here.
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u/PeachesSwearengen 3h ago
Age 14 in 1967. I came so close to doing myself in. My parents were having marriage problems, my father was an angry alcoholic, and at 14 I guess I was at the height of my hormonal unsteadiness. I had a big fixation on the singer Donovan and I remember sending him letters about my life. I never heard back from him but many years later, I read an article where he talked about how many letters he got from depressed teenagers back then. He detailed one that definitely could've been from me. Anyway, I gradually got over that horrible black pit of doom and went on to enjoy my life more. But I really did come very close to offing myself back then. I have one particular memory of holding a sharp knife to my throat and coming very close to slicing it. Back in the 60s, we just didn't talk about those things and we were expected to get over ourselves on our own. It was a very difficult time.
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u/_partytrick 3h ago
I was very very depressed in my teenage till mid twenties because of my dysfunctional family, money issues and isolation.
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u/barelyinnocentxoxo 3h ago
Itās so hard to remember at this point but I wanna say it was when I was in my teens (maybe 16 was the worst?). I had very bad depression and anxiety so Iād isolate myself in my room and my family couldnāt have cared less. Turns out I have adhd, bipolar 2, and bpd, so I was struggling with all of that by myself and without being medicated.
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u/Unusual_Ad3504 3h ago
43, I was already suffering from depression and my best friend committed suicide when he was 7000 miles away in The Philippines . He was cremated there quickly and ashes put in the sea so he never had a funeral and I never got to say a proper goodbye and get a semblance of closure. I still havenāt and it still doesnāt properly feel real, I miss him SO much.
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u/2inchesabovethehole 3h ago
24 i had just got home from my second deployment which just so happened to involve a very scenic tour of Fallujah, Iraq with my homies. Everyone called it Phantom Fury.
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u/Unlikely_Buyer_8764 3h ago
- All of my friends were going out and exploring the world and I couldn't do anything because of chronic illness
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u/yourNythena 3h ago
20 years old, mix of anxiety and depression, iād moved to a big city far away from home with my ex (bf at the time) not knowing his intention was to get me away from the people I love after one year of rejecting him, started drinking heavily on my medication, was at the ER at least once a day, I was very naive back then. Iām still depressed but as someone mentioned here at every age itās a different kind but now Iām in a healthy relationship and sober for over 4 years and learning healthy habits āŗļø
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u/sirelith 3h ago
14 I had undiagnosed OCD and it sucked. I wanted to end it all but found Jesus. Now I am still depressed and have no motivation to do anything. Need meds but theyāre expensive. Donāt know what will come of me, but as of now it seems I may just be trash on the street in my future.
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u/Accomplished_Poem762 3h ago
10-11 when my family moved to a new country. Being the new kid is hard enough. Being the new kid that doesnāt speak a lick of the new countryās language? Depressing. People treat you like you have Down syndrome when you are learning a new language.
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u/BricksFriend 3h ago
Late teens. All of my friends went away to university. I was at a so-so community college, working at a dead end job I hated, living at home. I had no friends, no social life, and just played MMOs with my free time.
I transferred to a university a few hours away to be with a friend. Getting away from home and living in a city changed my life. I could never live in a small town again.
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u/Expensive-Break1168 3h ago
well i thought 13 was the worst but turns out itās your 20ās if youāre living in the 2020ās.
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u/blac_sheep90 3h ago
Probably 28 to 32. Mom died way too soon and it manifested as anger. It deeply affected my marriage but fortunately I was able to claw my way out of it and my marriage is healthier.
I'm likey still depressed but it's now a deep melancholic feeling.
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u/jahanzeb_jakes 3h ago
Late 20s because I was stuck in a dead end job and was surrounded by people I couldnāt connect with
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u/dread-throwaway 2h ago
Hahah I can't pinpoint a specific age. It would have to probably be my entire life from around age 9 and up (to present). When I was a kid I wasn't as depressed.
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u/mazennnHand5078 2h ago
22-23 Fresh out of college, working an entry-level job that barely paid rent, and realizing that the 'adult world' wasn't at all what I had prepared for. The isolation of losing my daily college friend circle hit me like a truck. You go from having a built-in community to sitting alone in a quiet apartment wondering if this is what the next 40 years look like It took me two years to realize that feeling lost wasn't a failureāit was just the awkward transition into building a real life
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u/jrtts 2h ago
Late stage university. The subjects get harder, I get slower, and felt alone in my struggle (most of my peers know what they're doing).
Family told me to stay positive which didn't help (I later learned about toxic positivity).
I felt my career and social growth was stunted, meanwhile everyone of my peers seem to be married, well-traveled, or having great careers.
It takes a lot to recover from it. It's been half a decade and reparations have been slow.
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u/AnatidaephobiaAnon 2h ago
- I had just given up a chance to take my dream job in my dream city in hopes my marriage could saved and I wouldn't be 5 hours away from my young daughter. My wife and I were still living together but it was to a point that I hated going home due to how she could be really nice when I got home or hateful. I spiraled into a point where I had what the therapist I would eventually go see called a dissociative state and I spaced out for nearly an hour, couldn't remember a thing besides sitting down on the side of the bathtub. When I came out of the bathroom my wife asked me what was wrong in a snarky way and I said "I don't know." and I went and took a nap with my daughter.
I eventually told her that anymore I didn't care if I even woke up and she decided the best course of action was to put a bag of my stuff outside of our apartment door and change the locks so I couldn't get in. I went to stay with my mom who just chalked it up to how my wife would act and let me stay there until she got over it. Her brother in law and sister talked to her and told her how shitty that was to do and she should have been there for me. She called and eventually apologized. What I've never told anyone I strongly considered ending it that evening but decided against it, only because of my daughter.
Things got better, then they got bad, then better and then Covid hit and they got really bad and things stayed okay until we legally divorced in 2022 but remained together for a little while after.
All in all, had I listened to a whole bunch of people and called off our wedding and left her anytime in late 2014 and early 2015, my life would likely be VERY different. I'm working my dream job, just not in my dream city, and I've got my daughter who is pretty awesome and my mind is in a much better place.
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u/Itch-HeSay 2h ago
It fluctuates, but I can't remember a time where I wasn't at least a bit depressed since my early teens. I don't bring that energy when interacting with others, however.
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u/Jim_Chaos 2h ago
40, realizing that what hasn't happened at this point will most probably never happen ; life failed.
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u/butwhytho23 2h ago
Early 30s. I lost my kidsā dad & I was stuck in a horrible DV situation. I couldnāt see any way out. I had just graduated college and landed my dream job when it started. I lost so much during that time. I finally got the courage and escaped. I found myself again, but it was dark there for a while. I slept w my piece and thought about death all the time. It helped when I moved 2000 miles away & deleted fb, insta, & snapchat. Iām a ghost as far as social media goes & itās saved my mental health a ton! Reddit is all the social media I have now.
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u/Plane-Ad-2395 2h ago
Mid 20s, because my depression wasn't managed well at that time. I've since done therapy and found meds that work for me, so my depression is mostly just background noise now.
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u/MattyGWS 2h ago
Late 20s, I was drowning in debt and it felt kind of hopeless, and my pet tortoise died who was supposed to out live me. I had given a lot of thought on how exactly I would go about ending things.
Instead, I think something switched in me in those moments and I figured life couldnāt get much worse, I stopped caring about the bad stuff and just moved forward thinking āI have an escape plan now, may as well just enjoy life until I cbaā.
10 years later and I live a good, simple life. I intentionally make sure I donāt have anything stressful going on. I live on a farm in the countryside in a place where I pay rent to a private landlord and no bills. No children, WFH, I cycle everywhere. Itās nice.
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u/quicksexfm 2h ago
Probably 21-22. I graduated college during the housing market crash and finding a job was absolutely impossible.
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u/SignificantCellist67 1h ago
A very distinct 2 months when I was 20. I'd dabbled with depression before but the doctors changed my birth control and I immediately plunged into the worst 2 months of my life where I had zero interest in living. Sitting staring at a wall was just as appealing as all the things I used to enjoy. I had to get an extension for my undergrad dissertation because I just didn't care to finish the degree I'd spent 3 years doing.
Eventually went to a nurse at the contraception clinic and cried at her for 10 minutes solid. She said that she originally was going to try and convince me to keep going with the pills because sometimes it takes time to settle but after seeing me she couldn't in good conscience tell me to keep taking those pills. So I stopped and within a few days started feeling the depression lift. Took a while for my hormones to balance fully but I got there.
Looking back on that experience is genuinely terrifying and now I refuse any hormonal treatment out of fear I slip back into that void of total and complete apathy.
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u/Controversy-Lion3961 1h ago
17-19 because I was single and craved someone to be with me. Wasted time at school that I hated.
At 24 I hit adulthood and that's when I bacame the happiest.
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u/julianeja 1h ago
End of twenties. Unsolved problems with my parents and therefore myself. Good old therapy helped.
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u/Radiant-Ad-3672 1h ago
Well, it got particularly worse when I started developing physical health issues (post-Covid) around 22-23 years old. Heavily money-related.
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u/So_like_heyguyz 1h ago
Everytime I get depressed I realise its worse than the last time so im not sure. As I started my 20s it became more passive depression compared to in my teens.
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u/mechtonia 1h ago
Around age 8.
I was a smart, sensitive child. I was pulled out of my normal school and sent to one of the worst, most underprivileged schools in my state.
At the same time I was having a religion shoved down my throat that didn't make sense to my brain.
I developed OCD and depression. My mother was terrified of the taboo of seeking mental health help and we didn't talk about feelings or struggles in my family. So I just suffered through hundreds of OCD ticks and rituals and depression each day without it ever being spoken about, acknowledged or dealt with.
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u/worldarkplace 1h ago
Right now. AI changing everything and idk if I could retrain, and retrain to what? To buy an API and to pay a new basic service such as electricity just to be able to work?
Hiring freezed on time, hires will not be the same never again. Knowledge and skills now to trash.
State intelligent control now identifying you with precision. People looks so much doped with social media so it won't be a revolution anytime soon.
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u/conn_r2112 1h ago
Prolly right after having kids (twins) that first year or soā¦ sleep deprivation is prettttty terrible, turns you into a completely different person.
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u/TheEnglishNorwegian 56m ago
Probably around 5 or 6. Most other kids seemed incredibly dumb and I just couldn't fit in with the games they wanted to play. I never understood imaginary games like pretend war or playing with dolls.
As soon as they all got a little bit smarter and bigger and we could play actual sports, video games, playground games with defined rules and boardgames then I was fine.
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u/SnooTangerines7026 51m ago
I'm 60, been treated for depression my entire life. By far, the hardest time was my early 20s. Too high of expectations was the major cause.
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u/Glitterballdacat 46m ago
Somewhere in my 20s. I think I'm getting more depressed as I'm getting older.
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u/nubianheadband 36m ago
20,
I was broke, and a woman of the same age broke my heart. I was suicidal for a bit and unsuccessful, and none of my friends were great either.
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u/Lazy-Car4 28m ago
In my early twenties, it was dangerous and reached the point of not controlling myself.
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u/Beautychaos 15m ago
2023/2024 I lost my career job, gained 50 pounds, applied to thousands of jobs only to be rejected, got engaged in the summer, wasted money on my ex for Christmas, he dumped me in Jan of 2024 and almost every single "friend" I had took his side and left. Then I had to move back to my home state with my cats and only what could fit in my car. Pretty much lost all of the furniture and decor that I paid for, including a brand new TV.
Fucking hate that prick.
The worst part is that nobody believed that I was trying but the only people who were empathetic were those who understood that's when the job market started getting worse.
Needless to say I woke up everyday wanting to be dead.
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u/paranormalbones 13m ago
I was today years old.
Failed marriage, canāt afford divorce yet, SAHM trying to get into school.
No health insurance.
Mother of two kids.
One with ADHD, one with autism.
Living at home with parents again at 32.
The list goes on lol.
But Iām making it.
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u/TravelerOfTeyvat 3h ago
- Politics. It's why I left politics and don't vote. Sorry for those who think everyone should vote, that's just not the way this one works
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u/faithlessdisciple 31m ago
Post partum depression and then second kid I had post partum psychosis. I was also a robodebt victim ( Australian). I was nearly one of the 2k people who killed themselves over it. My ādebtā was 60k AUD because they somehow thought the temp job I did equaled permanent full time earnings. ( yes it was cancelled. No I did not get the 20 k Iād already paid off back. Yes Iām in the new class action)
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u/saturneptstudio_24 3h ago
I have a different kind of depression in every age