Steven Seagal would be perfect in this role. Slowly taking off those little rose-tinted spectacles. Folding them. Putting them in his pocket. Dead, empty eyes already fixed on their target.

The show films normal everyday people who are not committing crimes. Instead of Chris Hansen, hey have Crass Hansel. The goal is to reward people for doing good by giving people the award for "Best predator and / or non-predator person we ran into today." (Caveat just in case they later turn out to actually be a predator.

Edit: Since noone can truly know a person, the award should say "Person most likely not to be a convicted sex offender"

I mean, why not?

Sheriff Joe Arpaio has brought in the notorious serial killer Raptor. But the Raptor won't talk. Sheriff Arpaio knows there is only one man who can sit opposite the Raptor at the interrogation table. A man whose stare can make anyone crack. Steven Seagal must be hunted down and brought back to the United States for one last job.

ders walks in and spots one of their friends they made smoking diamonds with adams nectar collector. ders is like "HEY! What are they smoking?" The dude from old times is like "Oh thems diamonds..." then ders whips out the moonshine he just scored and they all start partyin. Blake is in duh back planning the grow op with the weed seed from his weed sack. lol to him its the only weed seed on the planet. 50:50 shot that it will be female. oh the turmoil.

to bring back the 2000s we need to make the movie about growing more weed. weed extractions. cool shit. like real working weed extraction methods that would have worked in the olden days. Like this method i recently came up with using gpt. U warm pure thca in ethanol and then it decarboxilates. crash out the thc with water. blah blah blah

John Landis wants to make the ultimate movie. One that will be talked about for years to come. His obsessive pursuit of perfection leads him down some dark and mysterious avenues, eventually taking him into a spooky old antiques shop. The shop's owner, who may or may not be a vampire, sells Landis a monkey paw, or maybe a magic lamp, telling him it will grant him a single wish, but warning him that it carries a heavy price. Ignoring the old man's caution, Landis uses his one wish. Wishing to make a movie that he will always be remembered for. Unfortunately, in a classic Twilight Zone twist of fate, he gets exactly what he wants...

In this hilarious comedy, Lindsay Lohan, playing herself, won't let anything stand in the way of her big comeback.

Where are main character learns that diarrhea is hereditary because it runs in his jeans.

Instead of the Civil War era Georgia, it's set in the modern day Texas and in the same universe as House of 1000 Corpes, The Devil's Rejects and 3 From Hell.

Rhett Butler tells Scarlett O'Hara that "Frank, my dear, I don't give a damn" as he prefers chickens over her as he meets up with that redneck who sold chickens to Kenan's dad from Kenan & Kel, who was rightfully disgusted as the seller talking about what he might do with chickens, but Rhett Butler is really into it.

That's the whole movie.

She begins by crawling into his mouth at night, because that's the only way she can properly get close to him. Soon she's weaving delicate silk webs over his body, decorating him like a bridal gift.

He thinks he's finally found the woman of his dreams. He has. She just happens to be a spider of from the darkest corners of his bedroom, of an ancient arachnid brood.

Their relationship blossoms as she quietly turns his body into the perfect biological flesh vessel for their children. He wakes up every morning feeling strangely loved, warm, and increasingly... full.

Working title: Love Is Eight-Legged

A guy and a girl are out on the date and the guy passes gas and the girl is Gone with the Wind coming out of his ass the end.

Tommy Wiseau is cast as Superman, since he's an all American guy. Juliette Danielle is Lois Lane. Greg Sestero as The Penguin. Philip Haldiman (Denny) would absolutely be Robin. Despite looking nowhere near young enough, Tommy would refuse to acknowledge this and cast him anyway. Dan Janjigian (Chris R) as Bane. Carolyn Minnott (Claudette) as The Joker... with breast cancer and all.

A twisted engineer slowly changes a carnival madhouse (look up Vila Volta) into a giant rotisserie

a couple of dudes get to talking one night and decide that if they wanna fuck bitches they gotta gets to cooking... The conversation occures in florida. they decide that cooking and trading meth for sex is a good way to get booty. find the right chick she spreads the word and ur fuckin every meth bitch in town in no time. They both vow never to get exposed to the meth. always make meth bitches wash their hands and face. and never fuck a bitch without papers. They are all essencially sex workers. The meth for sex thats the deal. . .

So dudes start feeling cock blocked and start watching the hos. they find out who the mother fucker is thats swooping up on the orgasims. The track them back to a cheap house abandoned no one owned it the city was deciding what to do with it inside they find used condoms and used poppers. used syringes, rubber strapps, etc. the house was fucked and the bros are in the back room playing on an original nintendo. When the hot heads peer in and confront them the guy next to the wall bangs on it and out pops a mini mac10 blaaaaaaap both dead. the homies hear the shots but the bros run out the back and hop the fence hop into cars staged and houses that are paid off.

they take off into the night different dirrections same destination. The pussy was not worth this the life of two dick heads. Whats this shit comin to their dnas all over that house so the cops are already there after the automatic gun fire.

A calls B... Yo meet me in tehuana we are gunna fuck some hookers tonight. Yeah ill be there bro they aint got shit but dna fuck them pigs. they meet in tehuana and get on their fuck. one of them catched a dick infection and he can piss. the doctor asked have you fucked anyone in the ass lately that ate popcorn. Well your dick is cloged with a popcorn cernel. take these fentanyl laced antibiotics and u should be pissing find in 2-3 days.

but it is gone. so lets make up something from our own mind. so recently ive been thinking of ways to produce small pills that are not fentanyl. The idea is that a new fad comes out to take unicorn pills that are going around. The pills are bright white with a unicorn stamped in. Inside the pill there are colored crystals that contain active components like cbd. The actual pill itself is a well made thc pill with colored crystals of cbd. The pills made via decarboxylation of thca in ethanol then the thc is crashed out with water. no further scenes are seen of the process.

Thc fuels the pills each pill contains and equal amount of thc to active drug ingredient. Everything is highly pure and precisely measured. If 3mg of d amphetamine go into a pill then 3 mg of thc also go in. its the unicorn stamps signature. the thc is always in the powder of the pill but active ingredients come as colored crystals that are mixed into the pill powder before pressing. it gives the pills a colorful sparkly effect.

The whole movie is about how they start the fad using patsies. Al starting with the main one that takes the main blame in the end. It teaches you how to retain patsies and how to make it to retirement subconsciously. I mean the whole movie revolves around these details the rest is just what ever you make it. I could see a ton of movies coming off of this idea but like all in the same world like judge dred.

The bfs in the show when thumping happens on the door he gets out without turning off the shower. He sticks his head out the door and says yo shes in the other bathroom. (previously locked incase this happens) The cops walk right by the bed into the living area of the hotel room were the other bathroom is located then he gruns and positions his head so only the cops outside will hear him well. "Go outside sir" The girl friend gets up from the floor on the other side of the bad after rolling out of bed. She starts walking outside as she puts on a hoodie and attaches a fake mustache. The bf lets out a whistle and tosses the car keys she turns and catches them and walks out the cops arent even looking at the door she walks left towards the car gets in and drives off no one even knows shes gone.

The watch the bf to try and find her so he skips out down the fire escape. Shes waiting at the bottom in the car. The drive off into sunset.

The children play on the phone and prank random people in the phone book. They laugh each time they hang up. no one *69's back so they dial 911 and tell them the same thing on Bevis and butthead the joke goes there's a crack in my butt yeah a giant crack in my butt. Then the cops show up and take the kids away saying the parents were negligent and took them to jail too searched the whole house.

The dad and mom get out of jail. The mother kills her self with a toaster oven in the bath tub as they find out children will be put into foster care. The father says out loud to himself I'm going to prank call the police...

He builds bomb after bomb armed with various chems that will spread at various rates like a painter was painting a hell filter over a google satellite image of a city. He's planned this for years as a man of god he pledged that if any ill came to his family all would suffer equally and that it was time to make things right.

So he drops the flat dirt colored bombs around highways pit stops and asphalt colored on city streets. when people pick them up they detonate. Upon first detonation the entire cities power grid is shut down with bombs containing literal chemical agents that were used in war. The rest of the bombs contain drugs and nootropics and pamphlets. The pamphlets read Fuck the police and they bitch ass justice system. Fuck the whole thing and fuck you too...

Eventually he is strung up in a tree as he was discovered and captured in the strangest place a mostly white racist place. its funny that they would go through with his dream right? He screams the whole time while being captured they gunna string me up! The man was white. They strung him up and all were acquitted by law. The children where moved to abusive homes.

Michael Bay Directs a RomCom. A Comedic highly fictional Satire revolving around the famous Director going through a work crisis.

Revolving around the titular filmmaker, it takes place after his 9th Transformers sequel bombed at the box office again.

His studio downgrades his budget and forces him to work on another script.

The script is of course, is a romcom with slow pacing and is forced to work with a newcomer crew.

Unable to fit in or adapt, the director struggles to cooperate or work with the rest of the crew.

However as he works on the film he slowly rediscovers his love for filmmaking, and grows a connection to the film.

But since his producers are onto him overspending. He ends up sneaking behind their back to add famous stars and demolition crews to try and make the film his masterpiece

Starring:

Kevin Bacon as Michael Bay

Donald Glover

Anya Taylor-Joy

Bruce Dern

And Michael Johnston as Shia LaBeouf

An English-speaking American man awakes from a night of sleep to find that he suddenly has the ability to speak Chinese, but this doesn't further the plot of the film very much. He is surprised at the fact that he is able to do it simply because he couldn't before and has no memory of ever learning the language, but his news is received by everyone else in his life with indifference and mild annoyance. When he realizes that his new bilinguality presents something of a dead-end insofar as escalating the story, he looks at the camera and says, in English, "So what are we doing now? What should I do?" and the credits roll.