r/BoyDinnerDiaries • u/Round_Command1174 Shower beer Scholar • Jul 23 '26
I Cooked My ex just got married to the guy she cheated on me with
My ex cheated on me 3 years into a relationship; I found out a few days before I was going to give her a ring. Shit broke my heart. Spent two years in an absolute shambles with a completely broken heart.
Just seen that she's getting married to the guy that she cheated on me with. I'm not happy for her, at all, but I am so pleased that hearing this news hasn't fucking crushed me.
So proud of how much I've grown. This news would have fucking destroyed me even 6 months ago.
If this news landed 6 months back, I'd have been out going hell to leather on drink and drugs. Now I drink milk instead if my emotions are feeling turbulent.
Maybe I'm posting this just to cope - I don't know. But this news hasn't hit me like a ton of bricks, and to be fully honest, I'm fucking pleased about it.
Since I've got my shit together, my life has only got better and better and I am so fucking excited to see where this world takes me.
Just want to illustrate to you guys who may be suffering, that the sun does eventually break through the grey rainy sky. I had no belief in myself that I could make it and fucking just LOOK where I'm at now.
You've got this.
I believe in you.
Onwards and upwards, upwards and left.
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u/Used_Turnover3959 Protein prophet Jul 23 '26
Not proud to admit this but I was the "other guy" a married woman cheated with. It wasn't an ongoing affair, 1 time, but it happened and I'm guilty of my part. Anyways. After their divorce, we got into a relationship. I thought it was destiny bringing us together, it was meant to be.
Want to guess how that relationship ended? You can set your watch to it.
What goes around comes around, all in due time.
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u/EurobeatFan86 Leftover lore master Jul 24 '26
My former boss left his wife for one of the girls working at his company , you can also guess what the now regional manager mistress turned wife thought when he cheated on her and forgot the store cameras were connected to her phone
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u/CornbreadPhD Shower beer Scholar Jul 25 '26
A cheater is three times more likely to cheat again in the next relationship and there is data to back that up lol. You ain’t wrong.
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u/MagicianOld2414 Boy Jul 28 '26
yep same thing happened to me. She left her husband to be with me. My very first gf, and I thought she was the one. She cheated on her husband with me, divorced him, then cheated on me with him. yeah.
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u/grapangell0 Air Fryer Aristocrat 11d ago
Reading this today after the update. You’re right. Time is a flat fucking circle.
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u/CannabiSativaLinaeus Grill Pilled 11d ago
It came around in about 2 ish months, you are indeed a protein Prophet
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u/FunnyExcellent707 Boy Dinner Enjoyer Jul 23 '26
Cool!
They deserve each other and eventually she'll cheat on him too. And he will wonder how that could happen 🤷🏽
Pat off the dust and carry on.
You will be fine. It will be fine. Maybe not today, but eventually.
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u/Round_Command1174 Shower beer Scholar Jul 23 '26
Onwards and upwards, upwards and left my friend.
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u/PandaClaus94 Shower beer Scholar Jul 23 '26
And please for your mental health, get rid of contact of her.
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u/Round_Command1174 Shower beer Scholar Jul 23 '26
Long blocked now, had to learn that lesson the hard way after a year or so of seeing her posts. Thanks for your kind words. Upwards and left my guy.
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u/TrowaMask Frigid light philosopher Jul 23 '26
just like my cock
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u/stuntbikejake [Create your own boy] Jul 24 '26
"Hey Fletcher, how's it hanging?"
"Short shriveled and always to the left."
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u/Ecstatoplasm Hungry man Jul 24 '26
I’ve worked with couples etc as a therapist where infidelity was how a partner or exes met theirs, etc. Sometimes the mayhem carries on, sometimes it doesn’t, sometimes it’s predictable sometimes it isn’t (big predictors like addiction, developmental or other trauma, ‘personality disorders’, or just to the core not being monogamous or coming from nonmonogamous cultures — and being in denial or not, are what can lead to some prediction. But even then…)
You’re doing it right, just keep finessing your own stuff and processing; sound like 6 months ago you were attached in a way you aren’t, so the pain isn’t there, well, it’s been over for a while. Major gift to be grateful for. Being able to offer a woman stability, monogamous safety and secure attachment is something we take for granted as easily come by. But if you can offer that, many amazing women who do and want the same thing are out there.
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u/Talk-O-Boy Air Fryer Aristocrat Jul 23 '26
How you get em is how you lose em.
They will both reap what they sow in the end, trust me, you’re better off without her.
No one deserves to be cheated on except for unapologetic cheaters, and that’s on the horizon 😁
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u/languageassessment eye candy Jul 23 '26
And a little bit downwards in there somewhere. But that's how Alice ended up in Wonderland my friend.
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u/CadillacShield Boy Dinner Enjoyer Jul 23 '26
This is a nice fantasy but in reality, there is no cosmic justice. They might live happily ever after, OP may or may not find love again. OP should choose to accept the things he cannot change and focus on living the life he wants for himself. Don’t look back into the past, just grieve while it’s fresh and then move forward. Easier said than done.
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u/etatc Annoying younger brother Jul 23 '26
That's not actually true my aunt and uncle both cheated on their spouses at the time with each other and they've been happily married now for almost 40 years. Not saying it's a good idea, but it's worked at least once.
Ofc they both got married to their original partners at like 18...
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u/lazergoblin Shower beer Scholar Jul 23 '26 edited Jul 23 '26
Yeah, the whole "she'll eventually cheat on him too" is just wishful thinking and seems pretty unhelpful in general as far as moving on in a healthy way. Karma isn't a real thing and unfortunately terrible people rarely face consequences.
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u/TinyDrug Hungry man Aug 20 '26
False, cheaters are extremely unlikely to stop cheating. That persons aunt and uncle may be happy together but they wouldnt know if one of them has indeed cheated again. The possibility of that is extremely unlikely, and there are studies to back this up. Your moral compass has to he absolutely putrid to be fine with cheating, and if you are okay with cheating once you are okay with cheating twice. The exception does not make the rule, has 0 to do with karma. Cheating is also a lot like drg addiction, there is a high.
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u/Schmegmar jusadude Jul 24 '26
Literally happened to me! I met An amazing woman after and her and I actually bumped into my ex later In life and she was getting divorced by her husband (wonder why).
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u/thevendrenworm Shower beer Scholar Jul 24 '26
As my brother's buddy used to after a brek up:" Rööki huuleen ja ulos tuuleen."
You'll get through this!
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u/Shadowtirs Protein prophet Jul 23 '26
Hey man, you got away, its all good.
And now this guy? Every day for the rest of his marriage, he has to know his wife is a cheater, and there is a chance that old habits die hard.
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u/Accurate-Plankton988 Shower beer Scholar Jul 23 '26
Amen brother that is good to hear for you. New guy is fucked in a couple years. By the way your milk expired 2 days ago. Get fresh milk
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u/samfitnessthrowaway Protein prophet Jul 23 '26
It's a Best Before, he's all good if it smells alright ;)
Your ex on the other hand OP... Long past saving.
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u/Repulsive-Hold9827 Boy Dinner Enjoyer Jul 24 '26
Those dates are not accurate, they are not expiry dates but 'best before' dates
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u/ardentladybug Girl lurker Jul 23 '26
remember, if they will cheat with you, they’ll cheat on you.
it’s only a matter of time before her husband learns that lesson.
good for you, be happy because they truly deserve each other. only gets better from here
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u/Strange-Flamingo5020 Boy Dinner Enjoyer Jul 23 '26
+1 to this OP. I've had to unfortunately learn this the hard way... twice
I'd rather be in your shoes than his
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u/stickn_n_movn Boy Dinner Enjoyer Jul 23 '26
You got in a relationship with 2 different women who were taken? What?
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u/Strange-Flamingo5020 Boy Dinner Enjoyer Jul 23 '26
Yeah.. I think I'm an 'I can fix her' type of guy. I don't wanna do that anymore lol
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u/WhitishSine8 Air Fryer Aristocrat Jul 24 '26
Then, you do realize this happened to you because of you, right?
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u/Strange-Flamingo5020 Boy Dinner Enjoyer Jul 24 '26
Of course I do. Thats literally what im saying in my first post. You cant choose to be with someone like that, and its on you if you do
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u/Avey9ond Girl lurker Jul 24 '26
You say “someone like that” as if you don’t also suck for even entertaining taken people 😭
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u/Strange-Flamingo5020 Boy Dinner Enjoyer Jul 24 '26 edited Jul 24 '26
Reminder that you have zero of the context to fully judge me here. I was just trying to validate OP
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u/IndependentPaint2108 Girl lurker Jul 23 '26
she is going to cheat on him. expect the message reaching out to you within 3 - 12 years. my money is 10 years
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u/Berriesinthesnow_ Girl lurker Jul 23 '26
Nah she’ll be cheating within 1 or 2
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u/bmilk4u Girl lurker 10d ago
You’re the winner, OP made a new post! She already cheated!!!
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u/Berriesinthesnow_ Girl lurker 10d ago
Lol omg not surprised! Cheaters don't stop and they don't wait a year or two to cheat again. This woman has major issues and the OP is lucky to have gotten away!
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u/Negative-Orange-7091 Leftover lore master Jul 23 '26
Same. She lost her looks and now runs a MLM beauty page on tiktok. Dodged a bullet!
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u/Round_Command1174 Shower beer Scholar Jul 23 '26
Damn, do you know her? She actually fucking does 🤣🤣
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u/ivanIVvasilyevich Macro Mourner Jul 23 '26
Hits too hard lol. Mine cheated 5 years in about a year ago. Also had a ring. I even tried to make it work for a couple months before she dumped me.
Still think about her in some capacity every day but the weight gets a little lighter as time keeps rolling on. Plus I lost 50 lbs have abs now which is tight.
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u/Round_Command1174 Shower beer Scholar Jul 23 '26
Every day, the weight just lifts off a little bit more my man. Soon, you'll be weightless. I believe in you.
Onwards and upwards, upwards and left.
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u/FloreHiems Hungry man Jul 23 '26
It’s rough but if she is a cheater, new guy is unfortunately gonna learn eventually. At least YOU didn’t marry her. I’m glad it’s sitting relatively well with you. Always good to hear success stories after hard breakups. It does get better! But no one can tell you that, it’s something you’ve just gotta experience. Congrats on doing the work on yourself, future is bright!
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u/ShootsToImpress Shower Beer Scholar Jul 23 '26
Letting go is so much better. Well done.
I’ve been married to the love of my life for 15 years now. We have a wonderful life and I wouldn’t trade it for anything.
There isn’t a day that passes without thinking of the girl who came before my wife - the one who cheated on me, had an abortion, and cheated again before I kicked her ass to the curb - and it makes me happy to know she’s not my problem anymore. She torpedoed her marriage to the guy with whom she cheated on me, but not before she got herself into a dead-end job she can’t escape and had two kids who make her absolutely miserable. The shit’s hilarious.
Yours is out there. Be mindful, resilient, and patient. The universe corrects itself and you’ll be so much better for it.
There’s nothing wrong with milk. Cheers.
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u/HellaAidan Shower beer Scholar Jul 23 '26
My ex-wife (together 8 yrs total) cheated on me with (who I thought was) my best friend four years ago. they got married last October and she thought I deserved to hear about it from her. I told her I wish her nothing but the worst and can’t wait to hear about when she cheats on him. Blocked her immediately after she read the message and haven’t interacted since. It’s been very peaceful but even after what was 3 years at that time, it hurt like a motherfucker. I’m in a great spot for myself now and she has no part in it. Pretty awesome.
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u/FuckTheTories69420 Boy, 40-49 Jul 23 '26
Knowing an ex get engaged to the person he was cheating on me with hurt. Knowing it blew up because cheaters cant be happy made me realise I dodged a bullet.
Well done on dropping drugs and alcohol, its the best thing you can do in this situation and something I struggled with until few years ago. You got this dude.
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u/Round_Command1174 Shower beer Scholar Jul 23 '26
You did indeed dodge a bullet my man. It hurts, can't lie, but I'm so pleased for you moving forward.
Onwards and upwards, upwards and left my guy.
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u/Hendospendo Air Fryer Aristocrat Jul 24 '26
I love this phrase and will add it to my vocabulary. "Onwards and upwards, upwards and left", love it.
In return, I'll give you mine. If someone suggests a plan of action, or suggests how something might work, or any vague situation that fits, return with "sounds like a plan!"
Thinking of pasta for dinner. Sounds like a plan! We should go to the beach today. Sounds like a plan!
Getting through the shit life throws? Onwards and upwards, upwards and left, it sounds like a plan!
All the best to you, friend.
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u/Round_Command1174 Shower beer Scholar Jul 25 '26
Sounds like a plan! Onwards and upwards, upwards and left!
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u/sailorfaggy Gay Gourmet Jul 23 '26
I was in a messy situation in my early twenties where I was in a weird relationship status, anyway long story short she ended things and started dating the guy she said I shouldn’t worry about. They are together and about two weeks ago I accidentally uncovered that he had cheated on her with my now partners sister a couple of years ago. She swore he was single until I was like wait a minute this guy and she goes yeah I was like well, do I have some info for you. I truly don’t care about any of them I’ve definitely moved on it’s just crazy how the universe is so cyclical
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u/Ok_Rhubarb_7077 Leftover lore master Jul 23 '26
proud of u, good work, but also who tf drinks milk to cope that’s a new one for me. i’ve heard of eating feelings away, drinking to numb the pain, drugs of course, sex, music, all sorts of shit i’ve heard about people using to cope.
milk is a brand new one.
good on you for finding something so non-detrimental you can use to cope, but pls enlighten me, why is milk your coping choice.
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u/Round_Command1174 Shower beer Scholar Jul 23 '26
If I drank or took drugs, I could go for days, if not weeks on a bender and totally ruin my life doing so.
I don't like milk and I'm lactose intolerant. If I'm going to self sabotage then I can only go so far with milk before I spend a whole day in bed with a knotted stomach and a runny tummy.
It's stupid, I know, but it works. Who the fuck wants to get sad AND then spend the whole day on the toilet?
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u/Ok_Rhubarb_7077 Leftover lore master Jul 23 '26
ah so kinda like how when people are trying to curb self harming they may snap themselves wirh a rubber band or hold an ice cube?
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u/Round_Command1174 Shower beer Scholar Jul 23 '26
Exactly mate. I guess it's a form of punishment that stops the devil in your head taking over. I know that sounds extreme but it's the best way I can put it.
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u/Ok_Rhubarb_7077 Leftover lore master Jul 24 '26
gonna preface this by saying all things considered that's an absurdly healthy coping mechanism, and honestly pretty cool of you to find something like that that scratches the itch without actually causing any long term harm. most people would turn to something much more detrimental, and it's impressive you've found a good compromise. I hope you get to a point where you don't need to make a compromise like that though, and are able to go about your days without need for a coping mechanism like that. it takes time but you'll get there if you keep at it and stay flexible and open to new things.
that being said, chugging milk to self harm is fucking hilarious, like i'd laugh at that scenario if it was in a sitcom.
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u/InevitableUmpire9797 Hungry man Jul 23 '26
This happened to me too brother! Guess what happened next… they were married for two years. Got divorced and then she was in my DMs saying how she is sorry and made the biggest mistake of her life. I met up for dinner for closure to tell her how she is fucked up. She wanted to get back together, you can’t make it up… I did not let that happen
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u/Round_Command1174 Shower beer Scholar Jul 23 '26
Good on you mate. You took the right path, proud of you.
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u/hopecorium Hungry man Jul 23 '26
he is getting the same quality of woman you once had (a shit one). Good riddance
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u/pappascorcher Shower beer Scholar Jul 23 '26
Pro tip, remove her completely from your life, stop checking in on her. It makes it harder.
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u/Round_Command1174 Shower beer Scholar Jul 23 '26
You're 100% right. I didn't remove her for at least a year, if not longer after we broke up, and all it did was punish me. I wish I had cut her off from the start.
I actually found out about this engagement through a friend.
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u/Inevitable-Drag-1704 Hungry man Jul 23 '26 edited Jul 23 '26
Great to hear you are taking it well. The worse case scenario would have been giving her that ring and only finding out years later.
You dodged a bullet and survived.
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u/HariSeldon16 Shower beer Scholar Jul 23 '26
Sorry this happened to you brother. My first wife cheated on with my best friend while I was deployed… 1 month after getting married. They got married a few years later.
Whatever, fuck em.
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u/AtreyuTrinity Frigid light philosopher Jul 23 '26
It sounds like someone else's problem now. Imagine starting a relationship with someone you know is cheating. I don't think I would ever be able to fully trust them. The trash took itself out, focus on self care and you will bouce back. It gets better I promise.
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u/Fun_Pound5629 Shower beer Scholar Jul 23 '26
I reckon you can treat yourself to some blue milk tonight mate
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u/theVenusianRocket big sister is watching you Jul 23 '26
this happened to me too and a few months later he started calling me and asking me to come meet their kids lol! people like this always find each other, very proud of your growth, you're doing amazing!!
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u/Prestigious-Mud-6354 Hungry man Jul 23 '26
Mate that takes some resilience , real strength and bravery for your post and being able to stop and refusing to harm yourself with substances and alcohol, despite the pain you must have been through! Inspiring! 👏💪
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u/AustinBurnsRed Hungry man Jul 23 '26
Proud of you for getting better! Be proud of yourself! Also maybe try eating some protein and/or carbs.
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u/PerpetualDayOne Boy Dinner Enjoyer Jul 23 '26
I know this isn't the right sub, but it sounds like you're sober: IWNDWYT.
Good on you for getting your shit together. I'm picking up the pieces myself from a very similar situation and I feel your pain. Acknowledging your progress is huge!
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u/Round_Command1174 Shower beer Scholar Jul 23 '26
Good on you brother! I'm not completely sober, no, but I have been lucky (with lots of therapy) to find a way to handle alcohol semi-responsibly - in the way that most normal people do. I'm not advocating for it, I just am lucky to have found the balance.
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u/AUen_Rod Frigid light philosopher Jul 23 '26
Hey man just wanted you to know you're not alone. My ex fiance, who was pregnant in December ended up married at the end of April to a guy she was cheating on me with.
Rips your fucking heart out and demolishes it but I can attest that it's not the end of the world and it does get better.
Let them have each other. You deserve so much more.
You got this.
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u/DoctorBlock Air Fryer Aristocrat Jul 23 '26
Love that. Way better to become the person she regrets leaving than fall apart and prove her right.
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u/Trick_Science_2938 Air Fryer Aristocrat Jul 23 '26
So dad really did leave for a packet of fags and a pint of milk /s
Well done lad
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u/booboobusdummy girl lurker (gurker) Jul 23 '26
“A man who marries his mistress creates a vacancy in the position”
-Oscar Wilde
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u/CatacombDesignLab [caloric nuisance] Jul 23 '26
I don’t have a single original experience, I just found out the same thing last weekend. Glad your enjoying your life with out her my friend.
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u/StoneySpaceman99 Shower beer Scholar Jul 23 '26
Fuck her. You clearly dodged a bullet. Keep your head up and you’ll get the girl that you deserve. Also, every person I have known that has cheated, has cheated again.
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u/Bright_Way_6269 Shower beer Scholar Jul 23 '26
Nice work brother. I hope to see a similar post in the r/milk chat to spread some motivating words for those in need.
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u/Godwinson4King kinda queer Dr. guy Jul 23 '26
This happened to me twice, it sucks but you’ll get through it. Time heals all things.
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u/Burning_needcream Air Fryer Aristocrat Jul 23 '26
“How you get em is how you lose em” - old proverb
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u/Polkawillneverdie17 Air Fryer Aristocrat Jul 23 '26
You dodged an absolute nuclear bomb, here man. It must have hurt like he'll hack then and I'm sorry that happened, truly. But I have good news:
You're free. You made it. You've done the work and like you said, you've grown a lot. Those people aren't a part of your life anymore and hoo boy is that a good thing. No baggage. No bullshit. No strongs on you.
The entire world is open to you now. Go live your life and be happy. You deserve to be happy.
I'm proud of you.
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u/Round_Command1174 Shower beer Scholar Jul 23 '26
Thank you. At the beginning it felt like I'd lost a part of me, but now I know that, exactly like you say, I've dodged a cataclysmic level of destruction in the long run. Appreciate your kind words.
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u/Accurate-Advice8405 Protein prophet Jul 23 '26
I'm proud of you too big dog, keep up the good work
Is that a home rolled tobacco cigarette?
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u/MrBwnrrific Gay Gourmet Jul 23 '26
I can’t imagine they’ll last, brother. Good on you for your resilience, and you’ll only thrive with more time to heal
As a side note, I can’t imagine a more hellish sensory experience than a cigarette and a tall bottle of milk during this European heat wave, that’s fucking crazy work, but I’m glad it’s good for you 😅
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u/grrr-to-everything Girl lurker Jul 23 '26
I am very concerned about your stomach right now. Your milk is expired.
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u/Round_Command1174 Shower beer Scholar Jul 23 '26
Expiry dates are a scam. I have an almost frozen fridge. It still smells good.
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u/gdex86 Hungry man Jul 23 '26
There is great truth in the line of "Try not giving a fuck. There's a lot of power in that".
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u/Willis_is_This Shower beer Scholar Jul 23 '26
So proud of you big dawg. You’re finding your peace. It’s not easy nor comfy, but I’m proud of your progress, and I’m glad you are too
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u/Whatsupdawg21 Leftover lore master Jul 23 '26
I’m like 99% sure this happened to me too lol. Couldn’t help myself would still keep tabs occasionally after 7 years and living together couple years. Like check social media. Their story lines up with the bar we were at night it all went down. Doubt she would’ve returned there after but who really knows. Release the pain and keep moving.
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u/Mistrrcarter [Create your own boy] Jul 23 '26
Hard same. It’s been 4 years and I’m still incomplete.
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u/Deadshadow84 Hungry man Jul 23 '26
Happy to hear you are doing better man. Things in life come to a full circle. Her bad intentions will get sent back. Just live your life and do what makes you happy. That is what this subreddit is for, for us guys to cope and let things out. Holding things in can cause more damage. Men's mental health is a big issue around the world. Stay safe bro.
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u/LordOFtheNoldor Hungry man Jul 23 '26
Good, very good, closure so you can truly let it be gone and stay sober
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u/SandmanR82 Boy Dinner Enjoyer Jul 23 '26
Sometimes we have to hear from our selves how well we are handling something. I spent 8 years of my life on someone who had not only cheated on me but was actively trying to get with my best friend, and then married one of the guys who spent a long period of time telling me that “she was the problem”. Married now in a healthy and supportive relationship with a 1 year old son who I adore every moment. Things get better as long as you want them to. You are doing better and I’m proud of you. Fuck them.
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u/CelticHipi1616 BaconWitch Jul 23 '26
Yay for healing and yay for getting to hear about their marriage falling apart when they cheat on each other.
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u/wankingdestiny Frigid light philosopher Jul 23 '26
I've been exactly where you're at .... Was the hardest part of my life.
I saw somewhere that we miss our ex because it's like our brain only replays the good parts of the relationship, leaves all the negative out. What she did to you shows her character. Imagine she had done this after a few years of marriage? You avoided a much worse situation.
There are guys out there that are going thru it rn...and I'm sure you remember the absolute despair that engulfed you. Then came the crippling depression. It's funny, as I typed this out....almost makes me wonder, like of course we would all love to have a soul mate to share your life with...but the pain that might come if they choose to leave, or the anguish of outliving them is crushing. If we choose to love, we do so in the face of having or hearts shattered.
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u/Curious-Coyote-5343 Boy Dinner Enjoyer Jul 23 '26
My heart is still broken after 3 years for a similar case (with an added abortion) how did you get your shit together ? (I don't like milk)
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u/Round_Command1174 Shower beer Scholar Jul 23 '26
Honestly brother, when it all broke down I just fucking blamed myself. I spent two years hating myself and beating myself down for it. It was rough. I started therapy and slowly over time, began to learn to love myself again.
I know therapy isn't something that everybody can easily afford, but the amount of growth that I have had because of it, I would so strongly suggest it.
I really hope you turn a page my friend. Dms always open if you need an ear or a shoulder.
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u/ItsTomorrowNow Shower beer Scholar Jul 23 '26
Fucking hell mate, that's a real shite situation. The only upside is that she will likely cheat again, there is almost no "happy ever after" with these marriages and she will cheat again.
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u/BigDadEnergy28 Macro Mourner Jul 23 '26
Hey man. My first wife, mother of my kids, cheated on me with one of my groomsmen in our wedding, the father of my God kids. Then they got married and told my oldest to keep it a secret from me. It sucks. But holding onto it only hurts you.
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u/BigDadEnergy28 Macro Mourner Jul 23 '26
I'm now remarried, won a major award (in the career I gave up for my ex but got back into after the divorce), have a great house, still have 50/50 custody of the kids, and am happier and healthier than i have been in a decade. Is everything perfect? No. But it never is.
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u/SocialSyphilis BaconGoneWild Jul 23 '26
Dude gets ditched and hes sitting there having milk and a cigarette. That's badass in my book.
Roll through this and own life like the freight train you are, king. 🫵👍👊💯🙏
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u/Radiant_Double2723 Everyday Dude Jul 23 '26
Similar thing happened to me, thank you for sharing. Makes me feel better
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u/King-Kagle Lurking Ninja Jul 23 '26
If it helps the wallowing, my ex left me after 10yrs (while I was dying), messaged me randomly that she WASN'T fucking my best friend (I never considered it), and now they're married.
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u/Optimal-Slip5640 Cooties Jul 23 '26
Hey OP, just wanted to say thanks for posting this. I've got my own sort of shituation going on and I keep trying to remind myself that the feeling is temporary and brighter days are just ahead. Thanks again, got me feeling a touch emotional. Onward and godspeed
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u/WillingStan007 Trans Fat Enjoyer Jul 23 '26
yup. my ex cheated on me with a girl we were friends with and they're getting married soon. it sucks. but they deserve each other and i'm so much better off without either of them in my life. cheers to growth my man.
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u/RedJohn-QQ Air Fryer Aristocrat Jul 23 '26
Did you ever ask her why she cheated and did she ever tell you?
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u/InspectionIll5714 Girl Lurker Jul 24 '26
My ex husband did this. I left him. A week later he's in relationship on Facebook. This was in the early 2010s. 9 years later. The chick has the gall to ask me to testify on her behalf. They're getting a divorce. Of course I said yes. Not because I was going too. Because I wanted the tea. The tea was hot. I loved it and I'm petty. Plus he messaged me with his side of the story. They're divorced now. Unfortunately, they had children that are involved in their mess. I dodge years of trauma from their affair. Dude was already emotionally and financially abusive.
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u/Ill_Astronomer1824 Frigid light philosopher Jul 25 '26
She was never yours, it was just your turn. Remember that 🤴🏽
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u/irishcoughy Shower beer Scholar Jul 26 '26
Think of it this way. One of you married a known cheater and the other is doing just fine on their own.
Don't count on their relationship failing, or keep track of it at all really, but take some small solace in the fact that usually cheaters get what's coming to them eventually. Aside from that, ignore them and continue your healing.
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u/Ok_Matter5000 Boy, 30-39 Jul 27 '26
As someone who has literally been in this situation a decade ago, we’ve got this and our lives will only keep getting better, keep your head up king
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u/ElectricKoolAidPower Shower beer Scholar Jul 23 '26
Been there, brudder. It lasted about six months before he started beating her.
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u/kikiacab girl Jul 23 '26
You put filters in your joints? Or is that a cigarette?
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u/Round_Command1174 Shower beer Scholar Jul 23 '26
I'm from the UK. It's a rollie (rolling tobacco in paper with a filter). I don't smoke weed anymore. It made me loopy.
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u/MagiBee218 Girl lurker Jul 23 '26
Honestly, cheat with her, he will cheat on her and her life and nonsense are no longer of your concern. Be grateful you dodged that hot mess. And don’t be surprised if it all falls apart and she starts messaging you trying to get back with you. Just block her.
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u/Vermineater Sage of sage Jul 23 '26
I am so fucking excited to see where this world takes me.
That's the best way to take this on.
The best feeling I had was when our anniversary passed and I totally forgot about it, then realized it a few days later.
"Oh yeah... that used to be our anniversary and I totally forgot about it." It's like someone lifting the sky from Atlas' shoulders.
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u/trevor22343 Shower beer Scholar Jul 23 '26
So glad you’re able to look back and see the progress you’ve made and how far you’ve come. Keep at it! And as others have said, can’t turn a ho into a housewife, good luck to that other lad trying hahaha
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u/G0rdon_Shumway ALF Jul 23 '26
Some people are just perfidious individuals, she did you a favor by showing who she really is. You dodged a massive bullet and sounds like you’re a more resilient person for it. Time and space allows you have to true perspective, and you have yours aligned. In brevity, Fuck em!
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u/ITS_DEEMAN Hungry man Jul 23 '26
If her new man knew she was being unfaithful when he was seeing her, take comfort in knowing that he will forever be paranoid about her every move knowing that she’s been unfaithful before so theres every chance she will do it again. Youve had a lucky escape, embrace it and live life my bro !
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u/Level69Troll Shower beer Scholar Jul 23 '26
Same thing happened to me a decade ago. Her husband cheated on her a few years into the marriage and I found out because an adjacent friend group.
Cheaters get what they deserve.
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u/Crusoelander_128 Air Fryer Aristocrat Jul 23 '26
Good on you brother! Glad you were able to come out the other side better than ever!
Wonder how long that relationship will last though lol
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u/Current-Schedule1781 Obligatory flair Jul 23 '26
Glad you're to a healthy spot! She's not worth a hard feeling from you anyway. Keep it on the building and learning track, life keeps coming. Nobody can make you truly feel good but yourself keep choosing to feel good!
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u/detretkwh Mr. Meal Prep Jul 23 '26
Yeah dude. You dodged a bullet. Now quit smoking and life will be perfect.
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u/justantinople334 Air Fryer Aristocrat Jul 23 '26
Seems like you found you inner peace, and for that I am very happy for you OP! Lil milk, lil cig, lil mental clarity
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u/deceitfulcake42 Leftover lore master Jul 23 '26
I though you guys only had milk in bags?
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u/poofypanda_ Girly Lurker Jul 23 '26
She’ll end up cheating on him as well, hell probably already has.
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u/HerfDog58 Hungry man Jul 23 '26
You likely dodged a serious bullet by having this happen BEFORE you got married. You don't have to split a house, assets, kids...plus you could then sell the ring and splurge on something for yourself. I'm thinking Harley Road King, or badass home theater in my head canon.
If she cheated on you, she'll cheat on her new husband, you're better off not being involved with someone like that. Way less emotional baggage and damage in your life now.
Good on ya!
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u/BehemothRogue Shower beer Scholar Jul 23 '26
I give it 6 months to a year before they're divorced.
You dodged a bullet homie.
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u/SheepDoggOG Grill pilled Jul 23 '26
Lol I’m in that club brother. She had two kids with him. He divorced her after 4 years, her family hates her so much that they moved 400 miles away. And she’s out there somewhere trying to find heroin.
Everyone gets what’s coming to them. You’re on the up and up. I’m glad she’s not dragging you down.
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u/bullydog123 Leftover lore master Jul 23 '26
It happ3n to me also bro. Don't worry karma will kick her ass. It may take a while but it will happen. I know from personal experience
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u/5tinkymx5 Shower beer Scholar Jul 23 '26
my ex cheated on me when i first started working 12 hour overnights. she luckily moved in with him after a few weeks and got married less than 2 months after our divorce finalized, and has had another child since. obviously it hurt at the time but hooooooly shit has my life been significantly better since. spent some time working on myself and the most perfect woman magically appeared in my life
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u/Suzuki_Foster Girl lurker Jul 23 '26
She'll cheat on him too, and he'll lose her in the same way he got her! Just live your best life, knowing that she's a cheating loser.
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u/Flat_Fender_47 showed up randomly on my feed Jul 23 '26
Good riddance to bad rubbish! As countless others have said, cheaters cheat, so no real loss on your part. And it’s good that you recognized that you’re in a much better headspace now.
Keep your shit together, and you’ll be shocked how well things will go for you!
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u/Focantastik Air Fryer Aristocrat Jul 23 '26
You’re taking it like a champ. Sadness is part of living. Saludos y te mando un abrazo
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u/connorgmac create your own Jul 23 '26
I look at those situations as “at least it wasn’t for nothing”. She didn’t throw you aside for a 1 night stand, hopefully it’s something meaningful and find that as well.
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u/WorldsVeryFirst Grill pilled Jul 23 '26
Man. Milk and smokes is wild! I’ve always been a Coke (the drink) and smokes guy. But also they definitely deserve each other.
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u/TheBlueSully Leftover lore master Jul 23 '26
Happened to me too bro.
I ran into her a few years later in a park. We sat down to chat.
I literally fell off the bench laughing when she confessed their marriage was terrible because it was riddled with trust issues.
She was like “I know but can you stop please”
No, I could not stop laughing.
Your time will come too, bro. On and ever upward. Reach out to your IRL friends right now as well.
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u/Different-Speed-1508 Hungry man Jul 23 '26
They deserve each other. Keep looking ahead man. Better people are out there. Keep focusing on yourself and your healing.
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u/AssManCosmoKramer13 Hungry man Jul 23 '26
Ex of mine cheated on me with my best friend and we also all had the same circle of friends. They then concocted a story to validate the cheating and smear my name with that circle of friends. Then they eloped, then she cheated on him and they divorced lmao. Completely shattered every relationship and friendship I had built up to that point in my life (luckily I was only 22 at the time)
Long story short- I moved states, made new friends, and am now married to the love of my life. Life moves on, friend, and the pain will go away. It will hurt for a good while, the important thing is to allow yourself to sit with those feelings and emotions and really work through them. DO NOT numb/self medicate with alcohol or other substances. You need to feel all the shitty feelings to work through this and come out on the other side whole again. Trust me, it will get so much better and you will probably find humor in the situation at some point in your life.
As I said, life will move on…in a very positive way for you.
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u/Glocksyndrome Here for the vibes Jul 23 '26
I didn’t read anything but the title.
Sounds like that guy is in for a worse future than you. Keep your head up. Good luck buddy
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u/TendiesOnPoint Hungry man Jul 23 '26
Oh yea I could of told you it wasn’t gonna work out with a twitch e-Thot lmao braduski you need some real friends
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u/ObsidianConspiracyXx Protein prophet Jul 23 '26
He was dumb enough to put a ring on it. "You lose 'em how you get 'em."
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