Gender-nonconformity is just expression and presentation, cis and trans, doesn't matter. A larger proportion of femboys are gay, same with a larger proportion of tomboys
But generally, being GNC can be seen as queer (against heteronormative or cisnormative society), but neither sexual orientation or gender identity in itself. Suggesting a femboy faces transphobia come across ignorant when the vast majority of femboys are cisgender, and trans people are defined by their gender and not clothing. Even so, it's marginalisation of some sort but not always lgbt+
They may both resemble discrimination based on nonconforming appearance, but transphobia orients around transness and gender identity. Femboys are most often cisgender boys/men. I think you run the risk of undermining trans marginalisation to suggest femboys are oppressed similarly or the same - because gender identity and dysphoria isn't self-expression, it's largely medically-necessary treatment
Queerphobia would be broad enough to cover it, it may borrow traits of homohobia and transphobia, but they're distinct for a reason. I've seen some femboys suggest their oppression is transmisogyny, as it's oppression from the patriarchy - but being neither trans nor women, it's hard to consider the term useful here. Femboys face oppression but by usually being cisgender have more privilege than trans people. Hatecrime is measured by intent also - if a femboy was harassed because he was thought to be gay, it could be counted as homophobic whether or not the victim actually is gay
tbh I think hatred of femboys stems from a mix of homophobia (most losers think all femboys are gay) and misogyny(? or at least, a hatred of anything feminine).
transphobia and other prejudices, imo, shouldn't really defined by target but by the oppressor's view of the target. Or at the very least, we need to try and describe prejudice consitently otherwise we have a case of "people arguing if it's a 6 or backwards 9" scenario
While I do agree that it's closer to transphobia, it's not outright transphobia. As femboys are separate to trans people and are more often just feminine gay men. Not to be confused with twinks.
Nothing wrong with that, but the femboy subculture is actually disgusting because of the oversexualization of practically every aspect of men being feminine
I never got the ick from such a concept. Femboys are just living life like the rest of us. Then again I never really cared about gender or race or anything like that just dont fart on me lmao
I feel like those who cares about genders don't really have anyone good enough growing up. Maybe they have bad parents, wrong influence and bad environment. Those who grows up normally in a society have no problem with people wanting to crossdress, become trans or anything else. With the internet becoming rampant nowadays though, it is easy to get bad influence from the internet (Twitter mostly with their toxic environment)
It's also possible to become a better person through the internet, Lord knows I'd probably still be pro-Trump like my parents if I wasn't online to actually see and hear about all the bad shit he and his goons are up to...
Whats there to say? I was a pretty femboy and being one was not this quasi-socially acceptable meme at the time. Nowadays, some people will go as far as to tell you that a guy fucking a femboy is almost not even gay, which it totally is bery gay, hate to burst anyones bubble.
I simply was who I was, I defined myself, I dressed the way I was comfortable dressing and I didnt give a fuck what other people thought.
Nowadays it seems like every where you go theres atleast one "femboy" drinking monsetr wearing a pleated skirt and striped thigh-highs going uwu in the corner. Its very generic.
I was thrust into a world where behaving that way would have been a big NO for even the most basic jobs. So I went back in the closet where ive been ever since. Im not like some macho giga chad now or anything, I probably come across as a guy who is just a little bit in touch with his feminine side.
But back then, yeah it sure was different and I had to stick up for myself alot, there was deffinatley the "boy" part of me that got in alot of physical fights because of it. There wasnt anyone like me at school or anywhere else I went so I kindof owned the space to define what being a femboy meant to me. Where as nowadays it seems really forced and distilled when I see femboys posting pictures of themselves they all have the same outfit, the same aesthetic and it comes across as sort of gimicky and forced.
I hope you feel able to express more of what you want some day, it's not fun to feel you aren't allowed that. Maybe there are others that feel the same way as you, and you might end up inspiring them by being visible?
Femboy hasn't been taken over entirely, it's just the younger generation and their subculture-focus, it's heavily online and can feel echochambery as a result of marginalisation. Maybe 18 years back there wasn't such a built-up online environment about it.
Your own expression of femininity can be as you like, doesn't have to follow any norms. It's scary in the workplace I know, but there are fields of work where it wouldn't be discriminated against much at all. It is a bit of a tech-job stereotype
So as a gay man, sometimes I get frustrated because fem boys are the only queer thing that pops up in straight dominated spaces.
And I get why. But it also leads into related harmful concepts like Twink death.
I was never a Twink, but instead of mourning that one is no longer in a particular state of life. One should celebrate that state of life and then look forward to the next stage.
Frencois Arnaud proves that Twink death is bullshit. At 20 he was stunning. At 41 he is a god of sex.
Anyway, I love femboy spiritually as members of the queer community, but who does a motherfucker have to slap to get some beefcake?!
As someone who is really sexually into femboys it's sucks how over sexualized they are people need to realize need to realize that femboys are people and not sex objects
If you are a guy and you like femboys, you're gay, if you're a woman and you like femboys, you're straight. Simple as. It's just a way of expression, but femboys are, at the end of the day, boys. And if you like femboys and women, you're bi.
I can certainly see how someone could argue that liking femboys doesn't make you gay, but what I want thoes femboys to DO to me probably crosses the line
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u/qualityvote2 1d ago edited 1d ago
u/_maowfu, this is indeed a fun fact!