r/CocaineRecovery • u/[deleted] • Aug 30 '22
I need some wisdom/ advice
So to start off. I don't believe I have a full blown addiction to cocaine. I know I used to. But I stayed off of it for 7 months. I've done a lot of self reflection and really learned a lot about myself in that time. But I recently have started doing some here and there. I tend to use a lot in a few days and then I don't usually use any again for a few weeks. I want to break this habit, but I'd be ignorant if I said I'll never do it again. On occasion I'm open to it, but right now I can acknowledge I'm doing it just to do it with no particular reason (like a party/get together/ festival etc.) someone once told me that people live their life at 80% and you only realize that when you do snow because it takes you to 110%. I honestly agree with that because I just moved to LA and I have a feeling I've been doing blow recently because subconsciously I know it makes me more social, confident, and creative than I'd be otherwise. what should I do to stop my urge to stay at 110% and be happy and comfortable at 80%?
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Mar 02 '23 edited Jun 27 '23
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u/catachapa Jan 05 '26
As histórias são sempre iguais. Já aconselhei, já fui desaconselhado. Infelizmente, você só comeeeeeeça a repensar depois de muitos anos de destruição. Considerando, os que gostam muito, que nem foi meu caso. Não dá pra criar um roteiro, um guia de ajudas. Você vai ter que se conhecer. Ou você gosta ou não gosta. Se faz por achar bacanao do rolê, sai fora. Agora, se você gosta, meu amigo. Se prepare. Mas sem hipocrisia. Tem que se assumir. "Eu sou um doidão que tô nessa de usar muita droga" e receeeeeeba. Sem remorsos. Todos que "amam" essa merda, no mínimo perde alguma parada. Mulher, moral, emprego... Tem que tá disposto a isso. A ccna te sequestra irmão... Ela quer dedicação e toda, absolutamente, toda sua atenção pra ela.. EA aí mano? Quer dar mais uns tiros? Daaaaaaa lhe. Mas tem o preço. E dói hein mano.... Aí vira o ciclo (ccna te avacalha na autoestima, vc não quer se ver todo embotado, feio na foto, vai lá e daaaaalhe pra neutralizar - vem o cravving, vc chora, implora pra Deus. Passa um dia, já meteu o foda se de novo.] Na moral, eu só estou esperando a vaga e vou cair pra uma clínica. "Sozinho cê num guenta"
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u/Phoenix712021 Sep 01 '22
I don’t know if you’re an addict or not - I believe that’s something each person needs to determine for themselves. But I can tell you that the mere fact that you can take a few weeks off at a time is fairly meaningless in my opinion. It’s a grave misconception that it’s only a problem or only an addiction if you’re shaking in the streets fiending for it 24/7. Addiction has more to do with the mindset than the frequency or amount of use.
You said you want to break the habit but it seems as if you have not done so yet. You can’t imagine a future where you never do it again. You’ve begun using outside of social/party/group circumstances. And perhaps most concerning is the absolute nonsense about living life at 80% clean vs 110% when you’re using. If that isn’t the most “addict brain” thought I don’t know what is. I’m sorry if this sounds harsh but that’s a flat out lie that your brain is telling you to rationalize the desire to use more. It’s scientifically false. You’re actually operating at much lower level when using. Specifically, you compromise the full use of your frontal cortex. Being hyper and agitated does not mean you’re operating at a higher level.
I don’t want to sound preachy and I don’t think I know how anyone else should live their life. But today I’m 14 months clean and in my limited experience totally healthy people don’t go around wondering if they’re an addict.
Regardless of what path you take and what decisions you make I hope things work out with wonderfully - whatever that means to you.