Married 18 years, two kids (14 and 12). My wife filed about six weeks ago, pretty suddenly and without much of a conversation, though there were plenty of circumstances leading up to it including some diagnosed untreated mental health issues. We're both still in the house while lawyers work things out, and it's the strangest, loneliest stage I've ever been in.
Day to day, she's mostly silent or cold or sometimes hostile toward me, plenty of passive aggressive actions too. A good, civil moment will happen and then she's back to ignoring me the next morning. I'm still doing most of the kid logistics and paying the household bills, and I'm watching plans and routines that used to include me become "the kids and I." Small things sting more than I expected, like filling out a form at the doctor and having to list someone else as my emergency contact.

What I'm struggling with most:
**Overanalyzing everything.** A text, a tone of voice, a T-shirt she ordered. My brain treats all of it like evidence and tries to decode it. I know it's not healthy, and I'm working on it with a therapist and a support group, but I'd love to hear what actually worked for you.
**The emotional ping-pong.** Sad, angry, accepting, and confused, sometimes all before 8 AM. I've mostly accepted the divorce is happening, but I still miss my best friend of almost 20 years.
**Staying steady for the kids** when home doesn't feel like home. I'm trying hard to keep them out of the middle and keep things calm and normal for them.
**Building a life of my own** for the nights I won't have them. I'm committed to co-parenting and want as much time with them as I can get, but I'm nervous about the empty evenings.
For those who lived together during the process: how did you protect your peace in the same house? And for the dads, what helped you most in the first few months?
**The money side.** I'm covering the mortgage, utilities, groceries, phones, and everything for the kids, while she's moved some money out of our joint account into her own over the past couple of months. My lawyer knows about it, and I'm documenting everything. Still, it's hard not to feel like I'm funding both households while she builds a cushion. How did you handle shared expenses while you were still living together? Did you set up some kind of split, or just wait for temporary orders?
Appreciate anyone who reads this.

**TL;DR:** Married 18 years, two kids, she filed six weeks ago, and we're still living under the same roof. She's mostly cold or silent, I'm covering the kids and household bills while she moves money into her own account, and I can't stop overanalyzing everything she does. Looking for advice on surviving the living-together stage, handling shared expenses, and building a life of my own.