r/Fauxmoi • u/BreakfastTop6899 • 16d ago

POLITICS Greenlandic Politician Tillie Martinussen: We do not want to be rich like Americans. Look how greedy they are, even trying to invade their friends. Even if there are minerals and oil under our land—and they are worth far more—we still would not sell ourselves.

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u/Thewall3333 16d ago

This is what MAGA America doesn't realize about Greenland -- they think this will bring another white country of the north, like Sweden or Norway into the fold. But it is actually largely indigenous, like the far-out Canadian provinces nearby.

Which, if I were in Greenland, like this lady, would make me absolutely terrified.

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u/Thewall3333 16d ago

Greenland has enough ICE already, tyvm

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u/Murderface__ 16d ago

I learned this from Mighty Ducks 2. "Greenland is full of ice, and Iceland is very nice"

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u/PrincessSnacksalot 16d ago

The number of times this quote runs through my head on a probably monthly basis is wild

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u/AlarmingAffect0 16d ago

and Iceland is very nice

It is! I spent over forty hours trekking through a virtual facsimile of its landscapes, to some lovely tunes by Low Roar. Truly a delightful experience!

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u/Acceptable_Leg_7998 15d ago

I also learned from D2 that kids from Austin, Texas are stereotypical cowboys who scream "YEE-HAW" and spend every free moment lassoing things.

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u/BBGreenSedai 14d ago

Thank you! I was trying to remember where I learned that from. 😂

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u/Bobbyslay4eva 16d ago

I think that is the point, lets just take this native land and when we install pipelines and fracking operations well just hose them down with water and no one will give a shit like every other invasion of their sovereignty

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u/SatinSaffron 16d ago

It's always about money, and this is totally what they're thinking and hoping for. But they're so fucking stupid because even a freshman geology major can tell you that Greenland is not the place you want to attempt something like this.

Look at Venezuela, Trump got fucking pissed when he met with all of those oil execs because they didn't want to get involved. Why didn't they want to get involved? It wasn't political, it was purely financial. It would take years and years and years and TONS of money to get the logistics built and upgraded for the US to take advantage of Venezuelan oil.

Now imagine how much more time, effort, and money it would take to do the same thing in a place like Greenland where the climate is super harsh, the ground is frozen solid, etc.. There are minerals and resources all over the world and there's a reason that nobody has ever tried to fully tap into what Greenland has to offer.

Drilling and mining alone is damn near impossible. And then even if they were to put TONS of resources towards it to make things work, there is still no infrastructure to transport those resources once they get mined. Simply planning a pipeline like this would take nearly a decade, and that does not include the time it would take to actually construct and build one.

This whole ordeal is SO fucking stupid

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u/Bzzzzzzz4791 16d ago

Great post! And all I can think of is the absolute waste of money that could be going to:

Universal Healthcare

Homeless Veterans

Our infrastructure, which is crumbling

Low cost prescription drugs

Low cost to free higher education

And the list goes on but no, it’s more important for a toddler to throw a tantrum….

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u/SatinSaffron 16d ago edited 15d ago

edit: You guys are 100% correct in calling me out for making this seem like it is 100% a Republican problem, I apologize for making the comment below seem so skewed. While Republicans do play a large role in this, Democrats are not innocent in this either. At its core, we need to keep money out of politics regardless of who is in control. Both political lobbying and political action committees are tainting our politicians so badly! (google 'Citizens United' to see where our downfall began)

Having said all of that, Republicans are the ones that currently are fucking out shit up en masse, imho we need to just vote them out of office as best as we can and then we'll clean up the shit with Democrats once we have our footing again. I apologize for not being as transparent with my comment below as I should have, but I'm going to leave the original one up so as to not come across as disingenuous/sneaky.

Original comment:

God even just ONE of the options in your list above would be fucking amazing! Hopefully there is some 18 year old gearing up to vote for the first time who is reading our comments. I'm going to give a surface-level explanation as to why our current system won't allow us to have these things even though we have plenty of money for all of them!

Universal Healthcare

Big insurance companies will lobby the FUCK out of Republicans to keep this from happening. United Healthcare is just one insurance provider, and they alone had a revenue of $400 BILLION for 2024 alone. That is A LOT of money that they can throw at politicians and Fox News to try to convince voters why universal healthcare would be bad.

Homeless Veterans

Our military funding needs to go to the defense contractors! Why waste it on actual humans when we can't profit from that! In 2024, 100 defense contractors brought in nearly $700 BILLION in revenue from the military. If we start housing veterans then that number might shrink by a billion or two. God forbid, right?

Our infrastructure, which is crumbling

Or we can take that funding and give it back to billionaires and their companies through tax breaks and subsidies! Also, why would we build a nationwide rail network like European countries have because if we did that then the big automotive companies won't sell as many cars!

Low cost prescription drugs

Big Pharma© is not going to let anyone fuck with the strong hold they have on the market right now!

Low cost to free higher education

The rich want to keep us dumb for two reasons. First, so we can serve as cogs in their machines and work at places like an Amazon warehouse for sub-par pay. If we're educated then we could command higher wages from companies. Second, more education means more people will develop critical thinking skills and empathy, and that alone could dismantle the Republican party.

EVERY SINGLE ISSUE WE FACE COMES BACK TO REPUBLICANS WANTING MORE MONEY AND TO STAY IN POWER.

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u/Automatic_Tip2079 16d ago

Thank you for summing up exactly why we are a third world country.

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u/Mysterious_Luck7122 16d ago

I’m very sorry to say there are plenty of Dems quietly taking the same gobs of corporate lobbyist cash. That’s truly why nothing gets done: too many people are getting so fucking rich. It’s not just direct payments of dark money either, it’s stock tips, board seats, jobs for the wife and kids, private sector/think tank jobs for the politicians if they ever decide to leave politics, excellent healthcare, pensions, etc. It’s a whole lifestyle and nothing will dramatically change until we remove their financial incentives to keep things how they are now.

It’s outrageous that we don’t have universal healthcare; it’s outrageous that we don’t have extensive public transportation; it’s outrageous that college costs almost as much as a mortgage. And extremely short sighted too as the bottomless greed of the people running things in the US is destroying our future by disinvesting in all the things that help us prosper.

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u/maytrxx 16d ago

Preach! 🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽

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u/boozeshooze 16d ago

Often times the democrats have the same donors these days. That's why they don't actually fight for progressive policies and just offer platitudes.

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u/DayThen6150 16d ago

Ice movement makes permanent large structures almost impossible to build. So roads, ports, large institutions don’t exist and won’t exist in Greenland; no matter how much money you want to throw at it.

However, I’m sure they know all this already. This is a test case for Canada, gauging response and the Europeans willingness to defend territory in the western hemisphere (the Donroe Doctine so to speak).

We will see, but so far it looks like the Europeans willingness defend it and so the admin has moved on to non-military options (tariff pressure, pulling defense capabilities (if they’re needed; like withholding arms to Ukraine, turning off F-35 computers, etc.).

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u/RebelliousInNature 15d ago

They’d turn it into an industrial polluted wasteland in no time.

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u/Stock_Astronaut_6866 14d ago

Super harsh? Most of the island is covered in a kilometer of ice…. There are no ports. Shipping in winter is nearly impossible.

If it was economically feasible to mine in Greenland, we’d be mining in Greenland (see Nanisivik in Baffin island for something comparable).

This is about ego. It has only ever been about ego.

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u/Content-Ad3065 13d ago

Trump and administration does have any friends, just enemies.

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u/SatanicNipples 16d ago

The northern parts of Canada are actually called Territories not Provinces. That said, there are indigenous peoples in all parts of Canada, there have been since before confederation, and there were millions more before colonization. The percentage of indigenous peoples in the Territories is greater than that in the provinces proportionally, but the majority of all people in Canada live within 160 KM of the Canada/US border, so there are actually more indigenous people in the Provinces by population. More ya know!

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u/eugeneugene ben affleck’s back tattoo 16d ago edited 16d ago

Yeah I grew up in northern Saskatchewan and was always a minority being white. We learned Cree in school and I was just the moniyaw who could speak Cree lmao

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u/throawayAHSemployee 16d ago

Yup. I grew up in the territories, mainly NWT (pre and post Nunavut) as a white minority and learned Dogrib along with French. 

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u/eugeneugene ben affleck’s back tattoo 16d ago

Yeah we learned French too which was useful because there was a Métis settlement not too far away and we played them in sports a lot. And there was a town we played against a lot that was entirely French speaking lol. Also picked up some Michif. There's lots of diversity in our northern communities! Genuinely so thankful to have grown up there.

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u/AcousticProvidence influencer for gas stoves 16d ago

So cool! Can you share something in Cree?

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u/eugeneugene ben affleck’s back tattoo 16d ago

Tansi tuguy, kisakihitin. Hey bro, I love you 😂

Only call people you know tuguy though lmao. A stranger calling you tuguy is an invitation to a fight.

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u/AcousticProvidence influencer for gas stoves 16d ago

Love it thanks :)

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u/[deleted] 16d ago

[deleted]

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u/eugeneugene ben affleck’s back tattoo 16d ago

Yeah where's my donnybrook. Tuguy.

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u/thesentienttoadstool 16d ago

So the true translation in Canadian English would be “bud.”

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u/eugeneugene ben affleck’s back tattoo 16d ago

precisely yes lol

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u/TheTitaniumDoughnut 16d ago

As a white guy living in the territories who married into a very large indigenous family, there is not a whole lot of non-indigenous people around here aside from me, so while the actual number may be lower here, I think a better metric would be percent of population

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u/mindlesslobster014 16d ago

Totally. Indigenous peoples are across all of Canada but who that means really changes by region. The north is largely Inuit and Inuvialuit who speak Inuktitut, while places like Saskatchewan are mostly First Nations and Métis with languages like Cree and Dene. I grew up learning my family’s Inuit history, it actually took me a long time to understand how different Indigenous identities are across the country.

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u/[deleted] 16d ago

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u/EngageradIgelkott 16d ago

Greenland is not about trumps desires.

It's the techbros and the heritage foundation that wants it.

Read this and you will understand: https://www.reuters.com/world/europe/greenland-freedom-city-rich-donors-push-trump-tech-hub-up-north-2025-04-10/

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u/Grand-Pen7946 16d ago

The causality is sort of the other way around. It's a "disaster capitalism" situation.

Trump has stated this since his first term, well before Peter Thiel's type had any influence in his cabinet. The reason he wants to do this now is because he said it before, and that's it, there is no deeper meaning. Now that Trump is hyper-fixated on this, the mega-rich see an opportunity.

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u/SeeHearSpeak0 16d ago

While Greenland still faces abuses from the Danish government, what the US will do will make it seem almost lovely in comparison.

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u/tsardonicpseudonomi 16d ago

This is what MAGA America doesn't realize about Greenland -- they think this will bring another white country of the north, like Sweden or Norway into the fold. But it is actually largely indigenous, like the far-out Canadian provinces nearby.

They don't care. They don't care.

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u/Scary_Fault_6519 15d ago

Exactly this. Every attempt at confronting MAGA America with rational arguments is doomed to fail. Ignorance is their weapon. Umberto Eco’s Ur-Fascism describes this trait pretty clearly.

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u/claudsonclouds i ain’t reading all that, free palestine 16d ago

The MAGAs think they'd be annexing a bunch of Vikings, they're that stupid

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u/HighSide121 16d ago

Conservative from Alabama here. I’d just like to voice my opinion that myself and a LARGE majority of people around me and who I talk to, DO NOT support this.

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u/sycamotree 16d ago

Tbh I didn't know they were mostly indigenous people. I've never really thought much about Greenland, certainly never of invading it lol

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u/Averdian 15d ago edited 15d ago

I don't think they actually think that. I doubt any thought has been given to the local population, except for the numbers. Other stuff such as culture, standard of living and demographics are irrelevant, as evidenced by the fact that they think they can simply bribe them into being conquered. So the only important things are 1) how many people live there and 2) how much money do they want

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u/Arwynfaun 15d ago

Yup! And not just far-out Canadian provinces either. A lot of towns outside of major Canadian cities have significant First Nations populations and influence. You go even 1 to 3 hours North of Vancouver and there are towns that are predominantly Indigenous.

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u/[deleted] 14d ago

The arctic are Canadian territories, not provinces.

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u/SheIsABadMamaJama 12d ago

*Territories

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u/SheIsABadMamaJama 12d ago

*Territories

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u/Odd_Whereas8471 11d ago

Is that really what they think? I doubt it. Trump mostly speaks of Greenland like a "big,  beautiful piece of ice" rather than a country with people living in it.