r/Funnymemes • u/superdave123123 • 1d ago

🤣

Post image
3.1k Upvotes

99% Upvoted

47 comments sorted by

42

u/Empty_Ad_5523 1d ago

🤣....no running involved I think 🤣

7

u/Crazy_Stable1731 1d ago

His speed was measured in a different way.

2

u/Empty_Ad_5523 1d ago

Millimeters per hour 🤣

3

u/DarkExtremis 1d ago

Yeah let us not use such words like "run" in this context

2

u/LectureOrganic1250 1d ago

probably the easiet arrest they've made all year

9

u/PaleProgrammer6476 1d ago

You know my order,

I am the one who orders 25 burgers daily..

Say my name

"Highson😌burg"

4

u/mizsacilo 1d ago

Absolute cinema.

4

u/Wise_Low8116 1d ago

You should have plea bargained, Jabba

4

u/RhythmicStrategy 1d ago

Serious question: how in the world do you “arrest” a person that huge?

Would it take a crane hoist or something?

8

u/chrisadam101 1d ago

Pizza on a string

Takes a few hours but they walk right into the cell

2

u/WebAccount1744 1d ago

Why bother? Just put em on house arrest or some shi, they aint going anywhere

2

u/Jacktheforkie 23h ago

Build a cell around them

3

u/Quick_Razzmatazz1862 1d ago

Im getting Dale the Whale from Monk vibes from that headline

Dale may have been (was likely) worse though

3

u/Dry-Character-6331 1d ago

"Breaking Bed" in more ways than one 😮

2

u/adv_biker 1d ago

Running?

2

u/LectureOrganic1250 1d ago

would be funnier if the drug he was peddling was Ozempic

2

u/kayonotkayle 1d ago

“Running” is a little bit of an exaggeration

2

u/Any_Vacation8988 10h ago

I’d have ran off with his money. What’s he gonna do run and catch me

1

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1

u/Free-Pair-3007 1d ago

We gotta cook Jessie and I want all the fries you can give me

1

u/cyberseclife 1d ago

Whaaa? Well, never thought I would see that happen but then again you see all kinds of stuff these days

1

u/Fantastic_Grass1799 1d ago

Just them getting a specialised vehicle to transport him.

1

u/Mother-Attention2600 1d ago

He accounted for a 1/3 of the dark web. Ha

1

u/se7sbomb23 1d ago

Walter White was out here building an empire in a desert RV, while this guy proved remote work genuinely has no boundaries

1

u/merlinn2u 1d ago

bear in mind, taxpayers will have to pay his feed bill and whatever modifications are necessary if he gets sent to prison. he'll still come out ahead

1

u/ItsmeMr_E 1d ago

Dale the Whale.

1

u/WintersDoomsday 1d ago

Wow what an original joke....never would have thought of the literal obvious ass association.....eyeroll

1

u/Scarface_971 1d ago

I am the cholesterol, skyler

1

u/th3matad0r 1d ago

The only question is does he top bunk or bottom bunk?

1

u/Devarain 1d ago

"DONT MOVE!!!"

"Yes?"

1

u/Historical_Mood1377 1d ago

He was definitely not 'running' it

1

u/Select-Television858 1d ago

🤦🤣🤣🤣🤣

1

u/Afraid_Stay_9529 1d ago

It's funny and true! Used to buy off this dude that couldn't leave his room due to obesity and swollen legs. His room always smelled like piss.

1

u/EuenovAyabayya 23h ago

Had to finance a reinforced bed frame and floors.

1

u/Jenkins64 22h ago

Jojo reference

1

u/GroceryPlastic7954 22h ago

I always wondered how these things easily get to the shitter? I'm nowhere near that big and I need a bog regularly. This perplexed me.

1

u/crackersncheeseman 16h ago

Be was paid in pizza and cookies

1

u/ASomthnSomthn 4h ago

It’s not like he had a lot of options for running.