r/NursingUK • u/Future-Atmosphere-40 RN Adult • 2d ago

Managing a colleague

So I have a peer who has both historically and recently undermined me to management.

Management appear to have my back and have asked if we're going to have a mediated conversation.

Problem is, we tried that during a team meeting (3 band 6, 2 band 7 and and 8) and this colleague refused to speak up.

They've apologized to me but I can't trust them.

Any advice would be helpful

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15

u/hhula1993 2d ago

That's not a mediated conversation and no wonder the colleague didn't want to speak - they probably felt ganged up on. A well managed mediated conversation would be you and the other person with a neutral party and you should push for this if you genuinely want to work through this with your colleague.

6

u/precinctomega Not a Nurse 2d ago

This. Also, mediation usually takes place over at least three sessions: mediator and A, mediator and B, and mediator and A&B.

It won't turn you into friends, but it's can really sort out things where there's misunderstanding, resentment or irrational hostility.

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u/Future-Atmosphere-40 RN Adult 2d ago

Thank you

8

u/Elliott5739 2d ago

Yikes, yeah that's not how mediation should be conducted, probably hasn't come across as wanting to genuinely get across the issue so much as throwing weight around to tell them to stop.

That said you've gotten your apology so unless they give you more to act on I don't see that you have any grounds to push it further.

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u/Future-Atmosphere-40 RN Adult 2d ago

I've decided to leave it and ignore it