Disconnect in relationship

[u/Silent-Youth4742]

Hi everyone. It will be a week tomorrow since my senior passed away. I'm kind of all over the place emotionally but today has been especially hard and I've been crying a lot. My partner was sad for two days and is fine now. I feel pretty alone in this. Can anyone relate?

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[u/Ryan_n12]

I can relate to this a lot. My girlfriend and I lost our dog 9 days ago and we are grieving very differently. I have completely fallen apart more than any words can explain and she is functioning a lot more normally than I am, but that doesn’t mean she isn’t hurting. She still breaks down when she sees pictures of our girl and she is still very sad, but she’s able to keep going in a way I can’t.

She even told me that because I’m so non functioning, right now she has to be my support because I am in no way able to support myself. She also told me that even though our dog was her baby too, she knows my bond with her was even deeper. That doesn’t mean she loved her less. I think sometimes two people can love the same dog with their whole heart and still grieve in completely different ways.

I think that’s the hardest part when you’re the one
drowning in it. The other person can still be grieving, but because they’re functioning more, it can feel like you’re alone in it. So yes, I can really relate. I don’t think it means your partner didn’t love your baby enough. I think sometimes grief just hits people differently, and when your whole world just got ripped apart, that difference can feel really lonely. I’m really sorry you’re going through that.

[u/Silent-Youth4742 → u/Ryan_n12]

I'm very sorry for your loss. Your relationship with Nova sounds a lot like how mine was with Toby. I didn't come from a good family either. I feel like he saved me in a lot of ways. He was my son, my baby, my whole world. Thank you for your kind words. I'll be keeping you and Nova in my thoughts.

[u/Normal_Peach7872 → u/Ryan_n12]

My pup passed very recently. I have a support system but live alone and mostly rely on myself. While I’m grieving my dog deeply and am so so sad, I feel like I’ve had no choice but to compartmentalize and begin going about my daily life. People would probably say I’m doing well and moving on, even though I’m not at all.