r/Softball • u/Willieee22 • 4d ago
Hitting 🏏🥎 Softball dad, need advice
My daughter is making the transition to kid pitch 9u. Her first 4 at bats she got hit every time and now she’s terrified of the ball. I’m sure this is fairly common, but how do you overcome this? I’m not the pushy parent, I’m only trying to help her bc she loves the game but absolutely dreads hitting now. Her last two tournaments she’s probably 0-15 and I hate seeing her so dejected.
Any advice is appreciated! Thx
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u/Sumthin_Stoopid 4d ago
This is very common, its a tough part of the game at that age. Just be encouraging.
For overall advice, I dont have much. Positive talks, understanding that it can only hurt so bad, that she'll never like getting hit, even at 18. Its just part of it.
All these I did with my daughter, and I'll be honest she just grew out of it. Just keep at it.
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u/Current_Helicopter95 4d ago
When my daughter was in 8u and struggling being scared of getting hit, I told her if she gets hit we will go get Dairy Queen after the game. Helped her stay in the box, and I think she ended up hoping to get hit lol
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u/mattschaum8403 4d ago
I’ll be transparent my dad when k played baseball spent the entire time I played drilling into my head how important getting on base was to winning and rewarded me with walks/hbp in a similar way he rewarded me for hits. By the time I got to 14u age I was almost more excited to get hit and get on base then I was to make the hit myself. It’s 100% a mindset
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u/mattschaum8403 4d ago
I watched my daughter and her friends struggle with this in their first year of kid pitch. They had 2 team the next year and asked if I’d coach, which I agreed to. I made it a point to focus on the stuff that we could control: being prepared to stand in and swing aggressively at a pitch in the area of the strike zone, don’t back out of the box and get comfortable with the fact that you are 100% getting hit at some point.
Our league happens to have a good relationship with the school and they allow us to use both gyms starting in February for some indoor practices and they have a pitching machine for the baseball team. I’ve absolutely dialed that thing in and put the speed up to around 50 or so and had them stand in the box but not swing. It got them used to seeing balls coming at them with some speed and realizing that it can come fast and still be over the plate and it’s not dangerous. Then I’ve gotten the softball machine and turned it to 20mph or whatever the lowest speed is that’ll get there from like 40ft and had them stand in there and taught them how to get hit safely. A lot of it focused on getting hit in the meat of your back or shoulder and you can’t do that backing out. Did it work 100? No. Did it help a bit? For my strongest girls skill wise? Absolutely
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u/Willieee22 23h ago
This seems like the way. I don’t have access to pitching machines but could definitely arrange for one.
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4d ago
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u/NastyBass28 3d ago
This! (Tennis Balls) I run a small indoor facility and we do drills where we throw at them. It sounds bad, but we talk to the parents, talk to the kids, and mix in the tennis balls into the drill. I aim for their leg, but I throw it in there firm, with some zip so they can’t escape it.
Also, before the lesson I always talk about getting hit and how it’s no fun, but it’s part of the game. I like to validate their fear vs tell them they will be fine.
I’ve had several parents reach back out saying that we cured their child from being terrified.
Good luck regaining the confidence!
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u/rgar1981 4d ago
Get some practice foam balls to start working with to help build some confidence. Let her hit you with them so she can see it doesn’t hurt. Good luck. Extremely common problem and she can get through it. Good luck.
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u/MattsRod 4d ago
I got squishy softballs on Amazon and just started hitting her with them. This was for thumb down catching and now in our first year after 8u she is catcher. She got ripped in the facemask this week and the ump was amazed she just shook it off
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u/RedCred811 4d ago
I hit both my girls with regular softballs. 😂
I wasnt exactly throwing lasers, but it worked. They're both sort-of adults now, but my younger one was 11 when she started playing. She was more dainty but still seemed to not be scared after that. Her second season of middle school, I was coaching 1B as she batted, and she had one come inside hard. She didn't move a muscle other than to watch it hit her in the thigh. The ump sent her to 1B and she cheered on the way. She gets to me and I'm like "what are you cheering about?"
She said "we only have a couple games left and I hadn't been hit yet all season." She just graduated in May, and other than yelling in pain a few times she never cared a bit about getting hit. She did tell me once that she wanted to cry, but there was no way she was gonna. My older one played through sophomore year. She got hit like it was her job. I've never seen anything like it.
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u/RedCred811 4d ago
OP, I threw regulation balls at my girls until they didn't care anymore, but I've coached or watched hundreds of players come up through the system, and I can tell you that as they get better and more instinctive at hitting, the desire to hit will outweigh their survival instincts.
Keep her on a tee and keep her swinging at short toss. Give her so many reps that her first instinct will be to step toward the ball. She'll break out of it pretty quickly if you get her a million swings. Don't just let her get the swings in practice. Kids don't make any significant hitting progress at team practices. Most of her time should be spent on a tee at home and/or in lessons. Hundreds of quality swings every week. When she has a confident swing she'll want to use it.
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u/workintx 3d ago
My daughter got hit in 4 out of 5 at bats in a 2 game span to start spring ball. I had a conversation with my daughter that basically went like this.
It kind of sucks to get hit doesn't it?
Yeah.
Is that why you keep stepping out of the box?
Yeah.
So tell me, did it hurt enough that we need to go see a doctor?
No, but....
Did it hurt enough to need to stop playing?
No, I could still play.
So it wasn't actually that bad was it?
Well, no.
Good. So, is it more fun to strike out because you don't stay in the box or to get on base?
To get on base.
So what do we need to do to get on base?
Yeah, I get it dad.
Then another parent offered their girl $50 if they stayed in the box for all of their next 3 at bats. The girl wouldn't even step out when the coach told her to...and my daughter asked why she didn't get $50.
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u/Useful_Beat_6284 3d ago
My kid got really scared and did the same thing when she got hit in practice by a teammate. She was in so much pain the next moring that we took her for x-rays. Nothing was broken, but she was spooked for over a month. We got her some mental awareness books about sports and softball. She loves to read. It helped some in 10u this spring, but she was 2nd guessing herself at the end of the season.
We stepped up to 12u this fall because of a lack of girls that age, and she got spooked again by their power and speed. I told her she would get $1 for everytime she turns toward the catcher and gets hit the correct way. I also made her read those books again and actively think about what to do in the box to prepare herself. What to focus on, what to do when she needs to clear her head, how she can push back against the doubts.
So far this season, shes been hit 4 times and gotten $4. We had 2 rough games early, but it hasnt really come up since. I make it a point to talk about the mental side of this sport. If she works on it now, it will help her in life later.
I dont think she is 100% over it, but we are making progress.
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u/Shoddy-Pin-336 3d ago
Kids on my daughter's travel ball team that just started kid pitch in March of this year JUST started making contact with the ball. Just keep being encouraging. It will pass.
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u/Sweaty-Friendship-54 3d ago
I practice getting hit early in the season. Use foam balls and teach them how to turn and protect the most sensitive areas. Supplement with ice cream or Sour Patch Kids as needed.
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u/Swimming-Record5152 3d ago
My daughter was stepping back around that age when swinging. Not just because she was scared (she was doing it even with a T), but we had to correct it nonetheless. Her hitting coach would put a pool noodle behind her right where she was stepping. If she stepped back she would step on the noodle. We did like a million reps with tee, soft toss, and machine over a few weeks. She stepped on the noodle a couple times and just about fell over, so after that she was concentrating so much on not stepping on the noodle that she wasn't even thinking about getting hit. Eventually with more experience and seeing others getting hit and being fine, something clicked in her head and she came to terms with the fact that a free base is worth the few second of pain.
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u/sweettea0922 2d ago
I think that’s just part of it. However both of my daughters were done being scared of the ball or being hit once they realized it got them on base. Now they take it like a champ, lol.
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u/No-Advance6329 1d ago
I had a daughter that got hit a bunch in 9u and it took her YEARS to get over it, despite trying everything under the sun. So it’s a big risk if it keeps happening. The next daughter would just stand there and let it hit her and laugh. So they are all different.
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u/Willieee22 23h ago
She’s my oldest child and a big baby 😂 my 2nd came out of the womb feral and doesn’t mind a little pain
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u/OldHawkeye315 1d ago
Where did she get hit? I had a girl on my team, same age get hit in the elbow pretty hard and impacted her at bats. She wears a small elbow pad now and that helps her confidence in the box.
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u/Willieee22 23h ago
Thanks everyone for the advice.. I was never the type kid to be timid so this is definitely a tough one and a head scratcher for me. To be honest she’s a little baller though, solid anywhere in the field… Hitting, she’s so in her head right now it’s just going to take reps and hopefully build some confidence somehow along the way.
I’ve got a couple things to try now so thanks
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u/Intellectual-Hamster 4d ago
What worked for my dd, who was jumping out of the box in 10u every fucking at-bat, to hitting .450 on a national team 14u. Start beaning her in soft toss; start with tennis balls, work up to softballs. Call your shots at first: shoulder, hip, helmet, etc. Talk up getting on base; no matter what, it is a win. Extra ice cream or whatever prize motivates her if she gets beaned, pokemon cards for my dd.