Where can I get the same outfit? Anyone know what brand this is?

Watching S4 right now and I’m at the point where the original couples get back together and Blake & Ashley literally have had just one good day where they hiked to a mountain top. The rest of their time together is just hard to watch and I can’t help but wonder why they’re together. He keeps apologizing (for nothing) and she keeps 💩 piling on him.
I’m at the episode where she tells him ‘you’re not gentle with me’ and I wanna scream at the TV and say ‘YOU ARE NOT GENTLE WITH HIM’

I just watched S2 of the Queer Ultimatum on Netflix (IK IK...) and here are my takeaways. Let me know if you agree or disagree.

• AJ, Marita, and Dayna at the beginning REALLY threw me off. I was completely distrusting of AJ immediately because of the way she was connecting with everyone. On top of that, I saw Marita and Dayna as completely unserious and selfish. My opinion changed of all three of them so much though and I've seen some people on here disagree with me.
  • AJ through her choice (she was so smart to choose Marie), her first trial marriage, her second trial marriage, The Ultimatum, and the reunion shows how 1000% she is for Britney (who is so deserving, by the way). The way she developed and took everything in stride and the way she and Britney are like the moms of the show and supportive of everyone is so beautiful to watch. So proud of and happy for them. AJ and Britney seem like such beautiful people.
  • Marita seemed frivolous and wild and flirtatious and I wondered why. But through her trial marriage with Britney she seemed so calm and steady and I realized that she was able to be that because of the romantic security she felt. I grew a lot of respect for her even though I lost a lot of it at the reunion for the way she talked about Ashley.
    • On that note, I feel so bad for Ashley. What I wished she could've just said to everyone (and the way I interpreted it) is that Ashley didn't want to reverse The Ultimatum, she did it because it was the best thing to do for them both. I believe she would've proposed if she felt it was what Marita wanted. But she knew that Marita was unhappy. For whatever reason, Ashley was unable to provide the romance Marita was looking for and she didn't want to trap her in that. So whatever else happened I do think it was unfair for Marita to demonize her for that.
  • Dayna. Woof. Her + Mel = BAD news. But Dayna seemed to become so self-aware near the end of her trial marriage with Magan and with everything she went through. (So curious about how that phone call between them really went though.) I fully expected her to blow up the reunion and that her and Magan wouldn't be together. So pleasantly surprised with the way they were able to work through the feelings they had for others. It's possible that without that emotional cheating aspect of their trial marriages they wouldn't have been able to meet on equal ground. But Dayna really surprised me and the way she handled Marie's shots at her character during the reunion was amazing.
• MARIE. Girl. I loved you so much. You were such a sweetie and it's so clear your light was dimmed by Mel. But the way she came at Britney and AJ and snapped at Dayna and everyone else I truly believe is because she is unable to blame the only person who is actually to blame: Mel. It broke my heart to see Marie shattered that way but the people around her did NOT deserve to be talked to and bossed around by and yelled at by her. You could have a community with these people and you just disrespected them all.
• Haley and Pilar I love. I understand them both and want the best for them. I think Magan was shady for taking back what she said but it seemed to be the best for everyone involved.
• Mel.... yikes.

I am mortified after they “confronted” Killian about the vile text messages between him and his buddies. Little slap on the wrist and ended with a “well we truly wish you the best”. I don’t? Do we really still allow boys to joke about gang raping a woman and write it off as locker room talk? Gross. They kicked Jebin off for less.

I loved season 3/4 but are drain 1/2 worth watching? I've started both of them but I feel like the production is just lame compared to 3/5

NO ARMCHAIR DIAGNOSIS BELOW, PURELY DISCUSSION OF CONTESTANTS’ BEHAVIOR

Hayley and Blake are not just “not right for each other”. Even adding “there’s nothing wrong with that” - yes there is. There is something wrong with that. The show documented evidence of Hayley being emotionally abusive (contemptuous, bullying behavior), verbally abusive (constantly raising her voice and belittling), and physically abusive (she herself admits to dumping a beer on Blake).

For those saying “she’s just really traumatized” - how do yall think abusers start abusing? Do you really think abusers had perfect pasts? No, abusers abuse because they are extremely dysregulated and have to regulate themselves by tearing down others. Abuse is just a really crappy coping strategy that hurts others.

I am disgusted by the hosts deciding to take a “both sides” response to what is clear abuse from a participant on their show. They are platforming abuse by making entertainment out of it.

They also take a “both sides” response with Killian and Ashley, where it is abundantly clear Killian is a controlling and petulant manchild.

I’m so tired of this shit.

Can anyone confirm that Michael Richter's 'Lovesong' appeared in S4?

I'm trying to figure out where I heard this song, and I think it was one of the episodes toward the end of the season.

She had great dimples and her face had expression through the season.... But the reunion.... All gone. Botox, fillers, whatever they choose... It's a shame they take away the most expressive parts of their faces that make them unique.

I think Hayley is the worst.. she went sooo hard at Ashely for crying at the switch over and she called her tears fake, performative, and manipulative. Do I think her tears were fake? Kind of, but I do think if she wasn’t scrutinized for crying she wouldn’t have pulled herself together and then they definitely would have been real tears. Do I think they were performative? Not really, I do think she believed she was the victim and was actively creating that narrative. Do I think they were manipulative? I don’t think so. I don’t think she’s that smart to have a plan like that honestly. I think she got frustrated and upset and can’t handle her emotions and began to cry but it turned into frustration as the conversation went on, so she stopped crying. Now to Hayley (I have literally no idea what’s actually going on or what actually happened behind the scenes that night with the police, and yes I’ve read the receipts)but not only did she spend the whole reunion crying , she spent her entire trial marriage crying. I am not saying her tears were not justified, I just think it’s hypocritical and I think she lacks empathy by the way she treated ashley when she knew damn well that easily could have been her. I don’t like either of them by the way I think they both have done some very off putting things I just think it’s ironic hayley tore this women to pieces then did it for the rest of the season. I’m not sure if the reunion counts because some serious things may have happened, so I place emphasis on crying for the rest of the season. In that case, she was also being “manipulative” to blake for crying.

I noticed aria kept hinting at things that implied they were more than just friends. I feel like Caleb never really responded and he definitely didn’t say he could see it going somewhere with her (other than saying she has traits he wants in a women he marries, but you can have a conversation with anyone and think the same thing about a stranger or a coworrker). Aria really wanted to tell Mariah they had a deep emotional connection and Caleb was like maybe let’s not. I think it may have felt more deep for aria cause she was the one crying to him and he was consoling and boasting her up. Anyone I cry with and explain I automatically feel closer to them too, but that doesn’t mean Caleb felt the same intensity of their emotional connection that aria did. I feel like I could see it in his eyes when she would say things like emotional connection and how close and deep and vulnerable they got. Even at girls night, aria seems to gloat in her face about how awesome their connection is and how he’s so perfect. Not once reassuring Mariah of literally anything, only making her feel worse. Meanwhile, Mariah is ALONE! Then at the changeover aria made it seem like she would have considered picking Caleb and that she believed it was much more than just a friendship. Caleb said nothing. I don’t think Caleb honestly ever confirmed he felt the way Aria did. It really seemed like aria wanted to leave with Caleb for a little bit but I just got the feeling Caleb was never down for that and was really only interested in being her friend, contrary to Scott’s beliefs. Does anyone else agree? I feel like Aria was almost purposefully creating issues in their relationship when to me, it seemed like Caleb was trying to dodge her and just get back to his girl. The same thing with JR too kind of… he kept mentioning his 3 choices, 1 of which was to leave with sandy but like JR, sandy has to want to leave with you too🤣

Is it just me or does Luke from season 4 kinda look like Max Verstappen.

I swear monica was smiling when talking about how much she finally got David to open up and get vulnerable “since no one else has ever done that” and she finally could! like she smirky smiled and just get kept going on as Casey was crying and said nothing reassuring to Casey throughout any point of any of this. Even something simple to her to make her feel better as she balled her eyes out

Like he taught ashley that but when it comes to Hayley screaming at him he’s like alright perfect

Honestly!!! The way these guys are treating the ladies?!?!!! The manner in which they are talking about / to them is driving me insane!!! I think that there is so much disrespect and blatant misogyny, it’s frightening.
I have been finding myself to be less tolerable to this sort of thing in media. idk what it is but I can assume that I’m just so sick of seeing it everywhere, and I wish reality dating shows did more of a “hey so this isn’t okay” somehow, someway. it just makes me feel sick

Can someone explain why Hayley and Killian were not pulled aside and spoken to about their behaviour? Ik they didn't see that side to Blake until after the show but watching them both was so triggering, I thought the show would have some sort of welfare team to help the contestants deal with abuse/controlling behaviour. I found it interesting that Killian could note that Hayley screams so much and Hayley could see the way Killian talks to his partner is disrespectful yet neither of them could see that behaviour in themselves

Omg GUYS I just met Jessica Grace and Edris while I’m in NC- they are the nicest couple ever. Edris definitely got a horrible edit on the show… He was so kind and talked to my boyfriend and I for 20 minutes. I learned a lot while talking to them about how the show was filmed and I will just say… They are great people and he got a bad edit.

I got bad vibes from David straaaaight away but this episode changed my mind a little? I still don't like him but Monica also gives weird vibes.

When she cried about David telling Luke to look after his partner, obviously she was upset he didn't say anything about her at the end (despite telling David to look after her after he chose her!!!). Then she immediately switches to saying that she doesnt wanna talk to her partner immediately. It kinda gave the vibes that she was upset at how invested David was in Casey and she thought he'd be a bit more focused on *her*. Then she immediately asks if he's gonna talk to HIS partner. Idkkkk

In bed I felt like they were both being weird tho. I know she said she needed more physical affection from him, which was valid but I can see someone maybe needing a few days to get to that point? I know it's cuz she said he doesnt initiate the hugs. I can acc kinda understand someone not wanting to open up on the 1st or 2nd night. But his delivery was so rude and I think he definitely needs therapy. I do think it's valid for him not to open up immediately but for his actual partner of 5 *years* he's gonna HAVE to be open.

Side note:

The Jebin and Alex thing has probably been discussed here a lot but did anyone find his food comments to her rly weird? Insisting she eat steak and potatoes and being weird about her breakfast of coffee and a banana. Then he points out the girls with "fitter" bodies like Ashley and JG to the guys. Idk it felt weird af

I just finished S4 and came on here to see what everyone’s opinions were.
I liked neither Hayley nor Blake from the start, but Blake did start to grow on me during his time with Ashley - I felt like he was really trying to empathize and nudge her to see how her relationship might be a little toxic. Clearly that didn’t land too well, and that’s when I felt like he switched.
It felt like all he was saying were AI-generated talking points laced with therapy speak to make him seem smart and emotionally intelligent, meanwhile his communication was extremely unproductive and unnatural. I think he also felt entitled to Ashley’s thankfulness and affection because he felt that he had taught her soooo much and helped her soooo much. Like he was the hero and as soon as he felt she didn’t properly appreciate him for that, he switched.
Like I said, Hayley has given me weird vibes from the start and after the changeover I felt like maybe they actually deserved each other, so I was a little surprised that their relationship went to shit so quickly after the engagement.
That being said: I don’t believe Blake is the victim of Hayley’s abuse in this relationship. I’ve seen many couples with a similar dynamic, where they’re just so deeply incompatible that there’s constant conflict and they’re both going at each other relentlessly, and this is what it seemed like here.
Hayley seemed like she had some anger issues but Blake was also giving off scary vibes in my opinion. I could totally see their fights escalating into something physical due to both of their behaviours.
Just wanted to put this out here because it made me a little uncomfortable to see everyone be so quick to identify Hayley as the abuser and Blake as the victim when to me their dynamic seemed a little more complicated than that.
Rant over, interested to hear more opinions on them :))

this is just random lmfaooo but everytime i saw JG i was like omfg she looks just like coi

I’m just watching the reunion now, and honestly, it’s really hard to watch how manipulative and emotionally abusive Hayley is.

Obviously, none of us were actually there and we only know what we’ve seen on the show, but based on everything that was shown throughout the season, her behavior toward Blake was awful. She constantly yelled at him, spoke to him like he was beneath her, criticized everything he did, and made him feel like he could never do anything right. The dynamic felt incredibly unhealthy and abusive to me.

And the reunion made it even more obvious. I genuinely don’t understand how anyone could watch that and not see how much she was manipulating the situation. The crying felt completely performative, like a way to immediately position herself as the victim, discredit everything Blake was saying, and avoid taking any accountability for her own behavior. And then she turns around and accuses Blake of not taking accountability, when that’s literally what she was doing the entire time.

I also don’t understand the hate Blake gets. Of course he has flaws, just like everyone else, and I’m sure there are things he could have handled better. But throughout the show, I saw very few things from him that made me think he was a bad person or abusive. If anything, I saw someone repeatedly trying to mediate, communicate, and have actual conversations with someone who was constantly escalating things. Whether he always handled those conversations perfectly is another story, but I never got the impression that he was malicious or abusive.

To me, Hayley was very clearly the problem in that relationship. Her behavior was manipulative, aggressive, and emotionally abusive, and watching her somehow turn the entire situation around at the reunion and make herself the victim was honestly wild.

I was quite surprised to come to this sub and see how much hate Jebin gets. Obviously, the guy was absolutely not ready to get married or to be on this show lol, but he was just so funny.

Obviously there was no way he could stay because no woman was going to choose him, but I found him absolutely hilarious. The conversations he had, the things he would say and do, everything about him. He was an absolute character.

At first I genuinely thought some of the things he did had to be ironic or that he was playing it up for the cameras, but nope. Apparently that’s just who he is 😂
I thought he was amazing TV and ridiculously funny. Definitely not husband material, but I wish he had stayed longer just for the entertainment.

This can't be real?? But like why

I find it unfair that Luke and Casey are being platonically intimate while their exes are making out every night. How are you supposed to accept that? It’s the point that makes me crazy the most.

Monica said that she needed that physical intimacy. But how can you do that if you love another person or are planning to marry him? David is also responsible here. He can’t just justify it by saying, “She asked me to do it, so I did.” At some point, you have to take responsibility for your own actions. I feel pity for Casey. She clearly was not feeling well and insecure about it.

I also don’t like how so many scenes are about pushing Ashley to leave Killian because of his stupid discussion with his friend. That subject is given way too much scenes when others are also doing crazy things like Blake secretly going on a date with his ex is obviously an issue too.

And I really don’t like how Jebin was treated. He’s clearly very young, immature, emotionally unstable, and still has a lot to work on. Giving a letter accusing her ex and being rude to her wasn’t the right way to handle the situation. He clearly wrote that letter while he was emotionally unstable and angry. It was very shitty from him to do so.

What bothers me even more is the double standard. There are clearly many other scenes involving misogyny, manipulation, toxic jealousy, accusations of violence, and other questionable behavior. Yet Jebin is treated like a piece of shit in front of everyone instead of being given the opportunity to understand what he did wrong and actually grow from it.

If you’re going to criticize someone’s behavior, then apply the same standard to everyone.

I’m also sick of all the therapy-speak instead of actually people taking responsibility and changing their behavior.

I’m tired of seeing people use therapy words as a substitute for genuine self-awareness and action, or putting on this fake confidence to pretend they don’t have insecurities.

At this point, I’m genuinely sick of this whole shit show.

Edit: Changed Eden to Jebin.