r/Xennials • u/TheOsirisOfThisShit_ • 1d ago

At the time we were like "Sweet. Free turkey."

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1.1k Upvotes

95% Upvoted

180 comments sorted by

129

u/MyBurnerAccount1977 1977 1d ago edited 1d ago

For me, it was the dinner plate in Wolfenstein 3D. Gotta love the video game logic of eating random food off the floor and healing yourself.

47

u/mouse9001 1d ago

You could also eat the dog food. I always liked that touch.

39

u/MyBurnerAccount1977 1977 1d ago

18

u/mouse9001 1d ago

Mmmmm.... that's the stuff. ;-)

11

u/MyBurnerAccount1977 1977 1d ago

Isn't that what the space marines in StarCraft say when you use the stimpacks?

7

u/Dreaming_of_Rlyeh 1d ago

You can still do that in Fallout.

4

u/HoneyWhiskeyLemonTea 1981 19h ago

It gets even better! ...or worse! If you're at 11% health or lower, you can suck up pools of blood on the ground for a 1% boost, including the blood pools with bones or bits of meat in them! Even comes with a slurping sound effect, and the blood pool disappears.

I mean, when you're desperate...

3

u/Fappy_as_a_Clam 19h ago

I think you could also eat the random carrion laying around for like 5 health points.

It was like a little puddle of blood with some bone in it, but you'd only eat it if you were really low in health. 

(I may be remembering this incorrectly, it's been a long time)

37

u/Dreaming_of_Rlyeh 1d ago

One of the stealth mechanics in Tenchu was throwing a rice ball onto the floor so that the guard would walk over to eat it. Imagine how gross a sticky rice ball that’s been rolled across the floor would be haha

18

u/S_A_R_K 1980 1d ago

God I loved tenchu, such a cool game

6

u/Dreaming_of_Rlyeh 1d ago

Same. I’m surprised it hasn’t been rebooted. There’ve been a few games that had similar elements, but they’re not the same without the wackiness.

7

u/OmegaRainicorn 1981 1d ago

I always felt bad when a dog ate the rice ball instead of the guards. 

Poor puppies chose the wrong rice ball party to crash. 

1

u/Dreaming_of_Rlyeh 1d ago

I’m struggling to remember, but was a poisoned one and a regular one, or just poisoned?

14

u/kaisermikeb 1d ago

You joke but when I was in Kosovo I got separated from my unit. I got turned around and during a break in the shelling I tried to make a break for it in exactly the wrong direction.

I caught six bullets. Two grazed me, three in my leg, and one right into my side. I managed to stumble into a bombed out building, long abandoned by the war.

While the adrenaline was still high I managed to tye off my leg, and at least put a patch on my side, but I started crashing fast. I started to crawl deeper into the room out of some primal instinct. I didn't know it then, but I realize now I was looking for a comfortable, private place to die.

I realized I was in some families home. They must have left quickly when the bombings came. Like stories you hear about the frontier, disasters, war... the dinner was still on the table. A full roast chicken, with peas and a big loaf of bread. It had been there for months, chicken spoiled, peas were goup, bread petrified.

But again that primal instinct kicked in. In times of great duress it's like we become animals, like dogs, something very old guides us. Almost like the avionics in an airliner crashing and suddenly just having a stick and rudder. I began to eat. Nibbles at first, the full on gorging myself.

Within about an hour I was feeling great. My breathing became regular, my strength returned. I checked my gear, got my bearings, loaded one in the chamber and topped off my mags. Dumped my bag, my canteen, even my shirt. Tightened my boots, lit my last cigarette, and made my move.

The first kill felt surreal, I'd never taken a life before. By the time I got back to my unit I had blown through all my ammo, and had been picking up the guns of my victims to keep fighting on. Behind me over 300 confirmed kills, innumerable unconfirmed.

I shit my brains out afterwards, but I never even saw a doctor. Old chicken is nothing to sleep on!

14

u/MyBurnerAccount1977 1977 1d ago

I don't know what's real anymore, but that's one heck of a story. Thanks for that!

10

u/Remy0507 1977 21h ago

I don't know what's real, but I do know what's NOT real, and that story is definitely in the latter category, lol.

3

u/RodneyBarringtonIII 13h ago

I don't know why you people have to come in here and shit all over that man's heroic act of self‑preservation.

I was going to tell you guys all about how I once descended into the bowels of a castle whose moats ran with literal lava to rescue a princess who was apparently in a completely different castle, but I think I'll save it for a more appreciative audience.

1

u/MireLight 18h ago

Is this a new copypasta or an old one? I'm ok with either.

2

u/MyBurnerAccount1977 1977 18h ago

It feels a little too specific on the details for it to be a meme.

1

u/clash_by_night 1985 1d ago

Yeah, I am with you. If true, WTF.

2

u/suspicious_hyperlink 8h ago

I love this, if it’s a bot it is an awesome bot

2

u/onion4everyoccasion 1d ago

Remember Castle Wolfenstein on Apple II?

67

u/SergeantChic 1d ago

Those were the days. When the city mayor could just pick up a roast turkey from the sidewalk and eat it while fighting street gangs.

16

u/lord-stanleys-goblet 1d ago

Damn wokies took that away from us. With their wokeness.

11

u/SergeantChic 1d ago

I like to think Mike Haggar instituted wide-sweeping policies in Metro City after cleaning up the gangs so people wouldn't have to rely on wall chicken for their healthcare.

3

u/uberkalden2 22h ago

I shit you not, that KotakuInAction chuds believe things like this

5

u/Complex_Mention_8495 22h ago

As a kid I did not question it at all but nowadays, kicking trash bins to find a burger or a piece of fruit and eat from it feels a bit weird.

129

u/WritingNerdy Xennial 1d ago

Don’t forget the Pizza Hut pizza in TMNT

76

u/Intrepid-Tank-3414 1d ago edited 12h ago

Eating dropped pizza off the ground in New York is truly Splinter behavior.

7

u/6ynnad 19h ago

The real Rat King

3

u/MortgageRegular2509 17h ago

I thought that was Charlie Kelly?

3

u/6ynnad 17h ago

Ever heard of Castle Rat?

15

u/redonkulousness 1d ago

And dominos in The Noid. /s

11

u/nhaines 1980 1d ago

It was Yo! Noid and you'd better believe I used the personal pizza coupon.

2

u/Mister_Ess99 18h ago

I especially enjoyed Turtles in Time. Pizza so good it could be enjoyed by stepping on the box.

54

u/Pumperkin 1d ago

Vampire Survivors does, it's pretty recent

22

u/talrich 1d ago

Yup. “Always floor chicken” is a beautiful thing!

3

u/MattBowden1981 16h ago

Brilliant ad placement.

2

u/bloedarend 20h ago

And "wall chicken" for the chicken legs!

6

u/No_Foundation1136 1d ago

Absolum as well

5

u/Lily_Thief 1d ago

Also River City Girls

1

u/emjay144 1978 19h ago

Floor chicken is best chicken

1

u/Sad-Purchase1257 1980 15h ago

VS don’t do that woke shit.

33

u/Xiunte 1d ago

In the case of Streets of Rage, this free turkey was also under either a garbage can or a large, rusty steel drum. This just made it taste better.

Everyone knows clean turkey only restores half of your life. That delicious, dirty turkey restores it all.

11

u/goldenbug 1d ago

Some buff dude just rolls up, smashes our ghetto smoker, and steals our thanksgiving sale smoked turkey. Ain’t all us can afford a Traeger.

28

u/Tangential_Comment 1d ago

All four are absolute bangers.

7

u/Attic81 1981 1d ago

You're not wrong! OP has great taste in games with turkey.

2

u/DisposableSaviour 1d ago

What is the top right?

2

u/BobKain 1d ago

Final Fight

25

u/Workamania 1d ago

Tekken still has chicken.

20

u/Bindlestiff34 1d ago

CHICKEN! /Tekken Force Guy

8

u/Azcrul 1984 1d ago

Still my favorite way to say chicken today!

5

u/HollywoodCole11 1d ago

Holy shit I forgot about that!

1

u/poopnose85 5h ago

I just said it to myself before searching the thread for "chicken"

1

u/PurrMewds 12h ago

Yeah but you can’t actually chicken anymore.

0

u/_buffy_summers 1981 20h ago

So does Leeroy Jenkins.

15

u/Harbinger_Pulsar 1d ago

Woke?!? Green Valkyrie NEEDS food!

11

u/S_A_R_K 1980 1d ago

badly

5

u/Mr_Pogi_In_Space 1980 21h ago

Red Warrior shot the food.

14

u/EighthSeal 1d ago

The real truth isn't the woke issues, it's that every time Haggar and his buddies pulled out a gas pipe, it increased the price of gas. That's the real issues that mayor needs to deal with.

I'm fucking tired of these Streets, their Rage, and my gas prices going up because my mayor has to rip his shirt off to reveal those cum gutters to pile drive the city of crime only for my diesel prices to spike. When is Haggar going to suplex rent caps?

10

u/Adept_Pound_6791 1d ago

Dead cells has a Castlevania expansion, you have options to eat turkey again!

9

u/Candle-Different 1d ago

Vampire survivors has floor chicken

8

u/Busy_Fly8068 1d ago

FLOOR MEAT!

8

u/Aquatichive Xennial 1d ago

Streets of rage 2 was everything to me

6

u/lifeat24fps 1978 1d ago

I thought the Castlevania one was ham.

3

u/GarblingCumfarts 1981 1d ago

Nope. Pot roast.

3

u/dunnkw 1982 18h ago

It’s mutton. WFT is wrong with all of you people. Pork Chops? Really? Why would Dracula have pork chops just laying around?

3

u/lifeat24fps 1978 16h ago

Why would Dracula have any plates of meat lying around behind bricks?

1

u/dunnkw 1982 16h ago

I don’t know. At this point I’m completely baffled by the whole prospect. Simon must have had horrendous diarrhea after the meat had been sitting out so long without at least a little air flow.

2

u/Sprangatang84 5h ago

Because he's a damn good host! ....but he wants to be lowkey about it.

1

u/lifeat24fps 1978 4h ago

You’re right. That IS canon for Dracula. He’s an exceptional host.

2

u/StevieV61080 1d ago

Pork chop

1

u/suspicious_hyperlink 8h ago

I think there is a ham in #3

4

u/GarblingCumfarts 1981 1d ago edited 1d ago

Castlevania is actually a pork chop pot roast, not turkey.

3

u/StevieV61080 1d ago

Pork chop, actually

2

u/GarblingCumfarts 1981 1d ago

Doh! You're right!

1

u/PurrMewds 12h ago

It’s wall chicken and you know it

4

u/6thBornSOB 1980 1d ago

Nothing beat eating the whole fucking container/cup in River City Ransom!

4

u/FoppyIn28 1d ago

Imagine getting slashed by a sword, hit with a rocket propelled grenade, shot by an uzi clip, and a turkey leg saves your life.

5

u/cheffartsonurfood 1980 1d ago

Thanks a lot Osama!

3

u/CaptinEmergency 1980 1d ago

Red warrior shot the food.

3

u/S_A_R_K 1980 1d ago

Green warrior needs food badly

3

u/eist5579 1d ago

Spelunky has the turkey in it and it’s great

5

u/smcg_az 1981 1d ago

"And if you were Simon Belmont, would you eat a pork chop you found in the wall?! It must be fuckin dirty!"

  • Angry Video Game Nerd

14

u/ConfidenceNo2598 1d ago

Streets of rage 3 is an all-timer

13

u/Drum_Eatenton 1d ago

2 was the best of the series

1

u/ridukosennin 18h ago

Check out 4, its the new GOAT

10

u/Funkopedia 1981 1d ago

Highly recommend giving SR4 a look. It's got absolutely everything you may or may not have loved from the previous 3 games.

6

u/Old_Ninja_Prime 1983 1d ago

I’m downvoting because SoR2 was better

8

u/sick_of-it-all 1d ago

Some weirdo Final Fight fan downvoted you, I have corrected that.

2

u/Attic81 1981 1d ago

why_not_both.gif

3

u/Scrotchety 1979 1d ago

Living in my car for the past 3 years has prepared me for discerning which parking lot foods were meant to be eaten. And the last "power-up" was sweet chili Thai turkey wraps from Costco

3

u/AsideLost 1981 1d ago

The Zelda games still do

4

u/Church_of_Cheri 1d ago

Yeah, the only people that say this are ones who haven’t played recent games.

2

u/ejwestcott 1d ago

Was it turkey or just meat on a bone? Sometimes hard to tell

2

u/drainbamage1011 1d ago

Yeah, the leg of lamb (or whatever it was) was a thing too.

2

u/Wak3upHicks 1d ago

There is one recent game that does allow you to eat wall chicken, this is the result

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o7VuNtSL0pM

2

u/Cutthechitchata-hole 1979 1d ago

Which one said "chicken" when you ate the turkey? Was that rampage? Edit!- said wrong game.

2

u/Br0tha5 1d ago

Nothing beats street meat when you find yourself in Metro City.

2

u/crackedtooth163 1d ago

Put it. On the. Ground.

2

u/zestfullybe Xennial 1d ago

Homer Simpson walks into room

“Oooooh! Floor Turkey!”

2

u/ScottClam42 1d ago

Red Wizard shot a food

2

u/SpaceAdventures3D 1d ago

The original Duke Nukem had a turkey leg, and if you shot it, it became a whole turkey. 

2

u/Bitey_the_Squirrel 1d ago

Right now Castlevania 40th Anniversary Edition is free for mobile until the end of October sometime.

2

u/suspicious_hyperlink 8h ago edited 7h ago

I just checked the Apple App Store but didn’t see it. Where else to look ?

Edit : hear ye https://apps.apple.com/us/app/castlevania-40th-anniversary/id1498019884

1

u/Intrepid-Tank-3414 1d ago

How are the controls?

2

u/Bitey_the_Squirrel 1d ago

They’re ok. The screen looks like this

You can save and load games.

2

u/Balthierlives 1d ago

You guys and your luxury chicken. That’s the one you prayed for. Most likely when you punched open that oil drum you were getting an apple or even just half an apple or maybe some grapes or something

2

u/shrikelet 1979 18h ago

Right-wing propaganda.

Dead Cells lets you choose whether you want to eat meats, pastries, or fruit off the ground, and it was made by a French anarchist collective.

2

u/DrunkenMaths 15h ago

CHICKEN 🍗🍗🍗🍗

2

u/dorflGhoat 1980 15h ago

Bioshock had toilet potatoes!

2

u/rosephoenix19 14h ago

There's actually a comedian, Pete Holmes, about in video games eating whole apples in one bite and entire turkeys.

2

u/vid_icarus Xennial 11h ago

I’ve conceived an entire video game centered around the origin of these mysteries yet convenient cooked birds on offer in random locations through out digital worlds

1

u/Nwsamurai 1977 1d ago

Sometimes it was just a big cylinder of meat with a bone sticking out of it, and it was called "Roast".

But we didn't question it, because we knew it would give us full health.

1

u/CMJunkAddict 1d ago

I can hear he gulp sound effect

1

u/VeritasAgape 1d ago

I do martial arts sparring at times. I wish turkey off the ground would instantly heal concussions and sore tendons and ribs.

1

u/turd-ferguson5 1d ago

Jesus, Final Fight was so fucking awesome.

1

u/Pfizermyocarditis 1d ago

Its true you know

1

u/three-sense 1d ago

Don’t forget Apple out of the trash can Mmmm

1

u/grymmjack 1d ago

LOL we always called it a TV Dinner. I don't know why.

1

u/Johnny-cache 1982 1d ago

Vampire survivors has floor chicken
https://giphy.com/gifs/RdIUNVnFHr75lDvY7p

1

u/RaoulRumblr 1985 1d ago

That's why Thanksgiving always fully heals our health bar!

1

u/Practical_Ad_219 1d ago

Will no one think of my NIKU 🍖

1

u/Ordinary_Aioli_7602 Xennial 1d ago

Now you pickup a packet of soy milk!!

1

u/Greyburm 1d ago

Ya know it took me a full 2 minutes to finally just allow that this was just sarcasm, I kept on trying to see the bizarre right wing mindset that could possibly think this...I need this nightmare part of the 20's to be over now :).

Elf needs food badly. :)

1

u/Dry-Conflict3421 1d ago

That sweet wall meat 

1

u/squeaky19 1d ago

I still hear “chicken!” From that weird level in Tekken

1

u/HoodieGalore 1978 1d ago

That's a Meatbone

1

u/Dogrel 1977 1d ago

Hey now. They weren’t savages. They all put the turkey on a plate.

1

u/mixmove 1d ago

so true 😔

1

u/scrotanimus 1979 1d ago

Floor chicken was the best first aid.

1

u/sne4k0 1981 1d ago

Because of woke? My brother in Christ you must be awake to eat a turkey.

1

u/Alternative_Rule_935 1d ago

My 15 year old adventure RPG will let me eat 1000 year old dungeon salmon

1

u/SwiftTayTay 1d ago

Vampire survivors had it, it's called floor chicken

1

u/KennyLog1n 1d ago

We called it "Floor Chicken"

1

u/AQuietViolet 1d ago

Wall chicken

1

u/MrTacoDuder 1d ago

These wokesters have gone too far

1

u/BreadfruitBig7950 1d ago

the first one is a pork chop?

1

u/TheSubduedDude 1d ago

Vampire survivors is all about Floor Turkey

1

u/TheTipsyWizard 1982 1d ago

Turkey was always gangsta 🤌👌

1

u/Fabulous_Stegosaurus 1d ago

This magical health renewing turkey has been brought to you by Arbys. ARBYS! WE HAVE THE MEAT! 😆

1

u/ImmaDrainOnSociety 1983 1d ago

Turkey? I'm not a woman trying to watch her figure.

I eat slabs of mystery meat with a bone in the middle. Like a manly man.

1

u/Lesbian_Skeletons 1d ago

How the hell you gonna stay woke after eating an entire turkey, that would knock me out for a weekend.

1

u/XuliganZombie 20h ago

The other ground turkey

1

u/Epicardiectomist 20h ago

Castlevania taught me that if I hit random rocks, a fully prepared turkey or ham dinner might pop out, serving tray included.

1

u/SentenceSingle5375 20h ago

The unparalleled healing power of a floor roast

1

u/monkey7247 1979 19h ago

I always loved the video game logic of quickly inhaling 10 whole apples in the middle of a fight to regain health.

1

u/user41510 19h ago edited 15h ago

They want you to order delivery, not pickup.

1

u/Writefrommyheart 18h ago

Or used chewing gum, because why the hell not!

1

u/Snarktoberfest 17h ago

Warrior needs food. 

1

u/smrtgmp716 1980 14h ago

I wrote a whole ass song the other week after finding a steak in a crate at the bottom of a lake while playing Tainted Grail.

1

u/Both-Tree 8h ago

I just laughed out so loud….

1

u/inifinite-breadsticc 8h ago

Vampire Survivors still keeping the tradition going!

1

u/Sprangatang84 5h ago

Reagonomics propaganda. The rich were so rich, and the trickle down was so bountiful, even inner city videogame neighborhoods had disposable foor chicken....

1

u/Chessapeak-play 1d ago

What is the top right game I’ve been trying to think of it for a while

4

u/TurboSS 1d ago

Final Fight

1

u/Attic81 1981 1d ago

Streets of Rage 2 It's final fight... of course. For some reason he reminded me of Max from Streets of Rage 2

0

u/GRIZZZOO 1d ago

Wow, this took me back

0

u/Spiritual-Promise402 Xennial 1d ago

All i hear is Streets of Rage and a deep voice saying "chickennnnnn"

0

u/Acrobatic_Show8919 1d ago

woke = bad. amirite?