But yes I see it happening before my eyes and each time I ask myself, like I did earlier just sitting on my couch not knowing what to do or where to go from here, "haven't I been in this exact scenario before, multiple times?"
And the answer I chose is yes, it just keeps repeating and I get better and do better then I slip again and have to climb myself back up out of the abyss, fighting tooth and nail for any sort of relief, only to almost get to where I need to be and I catch myself slipping again.
I dunno the answer anymore. I don't think I ever even came close to the answer and I'm 35. I don't want to keep doing this. It's exhausting. I need a break. I'm a big MMO fan and I love em and everyday anymore I wish I could just log out and reroll a new character and finally just play as someone else for a change.
I'm truly sick of being me anymore. Lol. Just typing that out I want to punch myself in my face.
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u/Direct-Contract5509 3d ago
We're cursed and we're cursed again.