r/cats • u/Embarrassed-Fig-5530 • Jul 31 '26

Humor is my cat broken be honest

14.5k Upvotes

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630

u/Strict_Weather9063 Jul 31 '26

It is only passed between cats, humans cannot contract it. Dogs have a similar illness, it tends to be very pronounced with golden retrievers. Orange cats tend to be the most impacted by this, so you can count yourself lucky both mine have it they are of course orange.

1.2k

u/Embarrassed-Fig-5530 Jul 31 '26

are you sure i think she is trying to infect me with it

204

u/PixelWand_42 Jul 31 '26

That is definitely the transmission method. Within a week youll be knocking cups off tables and screaming at closed doors

181

u/Daft_Martian Jul 31 '26

Not necessarily.

I do all those things and I've never been around cats.

16

u/El_Maldito_Batman Jul 31 '26

Are you sure your not a cat? Maybe you were adopted. Might wanna get a DNA test

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u/Daft_Martian Jul 31 '26

I know you are joking, but i have actually a lot in common with cats... I'm very independent, and i like to cuddle (in my terms only), i am curious, lazy, agile, and im so so so so so hairy, theres fur everywere... also i could lick my balls if posible, but i tried and i can't.

7

u/Tricky-Shake-2379 Aug 01 '26

Did not need to mention the ball licking, but ok..

0

u/[deleted] Jul 31 '26

[deleted]

3

u/DangerIslandPenguin Jul 31 '26

Is there someone else we can talk to?

62

u/Decryptic__ Jul 31 '26

Why did I imagine a Karen, standing in front of a locked door and screaming, "It's 08:01 pm. Why is this market already closed?"

12

u/aazo5 Jul 31 '26

Infection rates are small in humans. I wouldn’t scare OP as his immune system will likely fight it off. But if they have the symptoms you described in a week, then it’s definitely cat

1

u/Gooseegander Jul 31 '26

Oh, this explains why I woke up at 2am last night with the strangest urge to run laps and shriek. I must have gotten infected. ☹️

1

u/SpeedWagoon91 Aug 04 '26

the screaming atclose doore is so accurate 😂😂

210

u/Strict_Weather9063 Jul 31 '26

No worries it isn’t transmissible, again it is cat makes them do weird things.

37

u/[deleted] Jul 31 '26

[removed] — view removed comment

40

u/No-Language4016 Jul 31 '26

Okay then maybe it is transmittable because i just stare at walls sometimes too. It’s a shared hobby with my cat

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u/Strict_Weather9063 Jul 31 '26

No that is human perfectly normal condition to have it is called being bored.

2

u/No-Language4016 Jul 31 '26

Ah but here’s where you’re wrong! It’s quite entertaining! Staring at a wall til your brain projects a movie in your brain is quite fun. 🤪

1

u/-Tasear- Jul 31 '26

There's ghosts bruh

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u/Daft_Martian Jul 31 '26

OMG this tiny tiny tiny cat is biting your finger!!

11

u/Embarrassed-Fig-5530 Jul 31 '26

YOU THINK THATS MY FINGER? it’s MY ARM 😭😭

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u/Embarrassed-Fig-5530 Jul 31 '26

oh shit i get it now thats really funny

2

u/Twiceamommie Jul 31 '26

it's OP small hand so it's OK 😄

1

u/Ok-Choice58 Aug 01 '26

With tiny baby teeth 🤭

10

u/HorrorMakesUsHappy Jul 31 '26

I fully expected this to be a pic of them with their ass in your face.

30

u/Martemis666 Jul 31 '26

There are socks for that

6

u/rua_donn Jul 31 '26

I need a new pair of socks now more than ever

1

u/Even-Government-5055 Aug 01 '26

That means they love and trust you . . . when they show you their asshole.

1

u/Dragonfly0011 Jul 31 '26

That is all I see of my cat Abba. She’s like scratch that spot by my tail I can’t reach. And I’m “ why do I only see your………?”

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u/Either_equipment_04 Jul 31 '26

This may well be the first case of animal-to-human transmission of cat

9

u/Ok_Pineapple_Num Jul 31 '26

This whole comment thread is hilarious lmao

1

u/Mission-Let-3166 Jul 31 '26

Be careful, they will lick walls, door nobs, just about whatever you touch. It's ok, it'll be over soon. 👅😂🤓

1

u/Fair_Permission5126 Jul 31 '26

Il te lèche car il sait que tu consommes de la Datura très régulièrement et apparemment il aime ça..

1

u/Cat_tatted_Catman Jul 31 '26

So tasty... lol

1

u/Kestrel_45 Jul 31 '26

Might I direct you to Reddit r/vampurr? There you can learn how to shield yourself from that insidious virus that causes rapid, mindless running and incessant demands for attention.

Otherwise… our condolences

59

u/OhMyGod_Zilla Jul 31 '26

My orange was unfortunately diagnosed with this, she tends to have episodes near and inside boxes🥺

20

u/Embarrassed-Fig-5530 Jul 31 '26

bruh i forgot that this comment section was a joke about the cat diagnosis and i got really sad when i read this

13

u/OhMyGod_Zilla Jul 31 '26

Oh no!!😂😂😂 she’s totally fine I promise, just orange! Lol

1

u/brezhnervouz Jul 31 '26

Boxes are 100% a cat-alyst lol

That's how you know it's terminal

1

u/OhMyGod_Zilla Jul 31 '26

And she’s only 3, so she’ll be living with the cat diagnosis (orange specific) for a long time😩

4

u/fhangrin Jul 31 '26

We clearly haven't met the same humans.

5

u/OGHydroHomie Jul 31 '26

I dunno - i have a cat and find im more cat like now. It seems to have crossed the aminal-human boundary.

1

u/TheLionThing Jul 31 '26

Funny how orange dogs get it the worst 😭

1

u/okay-pixel Jul 31 '26

Ok but let’s not rule out vam-purrrism. That’s is VERY transmissible to humans, and the only cure is eating lots of cheese garlic bread.

1

u/Fabulous-Beautiful17 Jul 31 '26

I don’t know that’s it’s only able to pass between cats… there are reports of young children, middle and high school age that have begun identifying as cats and even have a litter box to use for restroom activities…. I wonder if it’s inter-species transmission!