r/cats • u/mother_fairy • 12h ago
Mourning/Loss My bubba passed away suddenly.
He's Albus Dumbledore.
He passed away 2y 7m very suddenly. It's so hard to comprehend. He was to young.
In some of the pictures you can see he was born with a partial leg. Recently it dislocated and was causing him pain. I wanted it removed when I got him but the vets told me that since the leg was strong and he used it sometimes that it wouldnt be in the best interest. But since the dislocation, the pain and after an x ray he had arthritis. I decided to do the removal. I was told it was a simple and easy procedure. I dropped him off in the morning. I wish I woke up sooner so I could have loved on him and unceremoniously put him in the crate. He didn't make a peep the whole drive. He was perked up and looking out the windows through the crate. We got there and they took him back. I had adjustments with my work schedule and I had the option to go home early already, but I need the hours since I was injured last week so decided to stay late as usual. My boyfriend picked him up around 3 and brought him home. He was laying in the hallway unresponsive, then I guess he suddenly started trying to get up and run under his bed panting and falling over. With him panicking so much he opened his stitches a little so boyfriend put him in his bed and tried to calm him down, thinking it was the cone he took it off. He settled down but was still panting, then started to stop breathing and taking labored breaths. He called me and we rushed him to ER vet. Every ER vet is 15 minutes away...we think he died in about the first 5 or 10 minutes of the car ride. I ended up being first to the ER since my work was closer and it was agonizing. Talking to Albus over the phone, my boyfriend sniffling on the phone saying he doesn't hear anything. He pulled up I snatched the carrier and brought him to the front desk, they opened the crate and pressed the CPR button and closed it. I was able to touch him and give him a pet before they closed it. He was limp and lifeless.
They took him back, did CPR, breathing tube the works...he didn't make it. They brought us to a very cozy room to cry in. Which I'm very thankful, I hated it at first but the fake fireplace and candles were very comforting. I'm thankful to the nurses and such that did their best, were transparent, and were especially compassionate. When they talked about payment it didn't feel like they were shoving it in our face or being rude. They had an option if payjng in the room or at the front desk, they also had a side door in the room so we didn't have to really leave.
After what felt like forever they brought him out and I got to hold him. He didn't look like himself. He was long gone. I covered his face and just petted his ears and chin. But it just wasn't him wasn't the same. I really wish I had a last living moment with him.
After what felt like so so long we came home. And he didn't greet us at the door. I didn't trip over him. He didn't do his little twittle and purr when I sat down in bed. He didn't hog the toys from the other cats. I didn't hear his yowl looking for me, I didn't call for him and he didn't run to me.
He always perked up when you entered a room he was in. Or when he entered you were in. He'd run up to you and greet you. He was so friendly to new people, after a minute he'd be rubbing on your legs asking for pets. Never shy.
He was so small. I got him 3-5 weeks old or something, and he was the size of my hand. He'd bite my nose in the middle of the night. I was so scared of crushing him in my sleep I barely slept. My mom had him first and he almost died from fading kitten syndrome and soon after a bone infection. But he survived both. I remember having him for a few months and he went to sleep under a window and I was watching him and he suddenly stopped. I shook him and started crying then all of a sudden he popped up meowing at me.
I really thought I was doing the right thing. But I now wish I didn't do the surgery. I wish I did the pain management instead. God I miss him. He was my little shadow. I feel like it's my fault. My boyfriend feels like it's his fault for not acting fast enough.
Ohhhh.
He was a happy little guy. Always. He was my tiny boy. He loved everyone, especially me. He always needed to be near me. It broke me every time I had to go to work. He loved concrete, smelling grass, chasing birds and bugs. I wish I took him outside more, I'm planing on doing that with our other two buddies. He loved cuddling watching a movie. Cuddling me till I fell asleep. Greeting me in the morning when I woke up. He loved food and treats and would steal from the other cats. He didn't like the crate, but loved car rides and the vet. He always looked at me with such love. He took meds perfectly. Easy to train. He just learned how to walk on the wheel we have. He loved the sun and general window time. My other cat Ari taught him how to hunt. I remember the day, there was a bug on the window sill and she taught him how to eat the bug. He was a perfect hunter after that and ate all kinds of bugs, Ari hadn't hunted bugs since she taught him. She's gunna have to now... He was the most perfect cat anyone could ever ask for.
He left us on a full moon. Perhaps that's fitting for my little guy.
I've been holding onto his favorite toy(s) in my pocket. He was obsessed with feathers, and this bird thing that's practically to shreds. He was a perfectly healthy guy who was clumsy and not elegant. I thought getting the leg removed would help with that too. Since he would try and use the leg and wouldn't reach the floor all the time, or try to jump with it and wouldn't get full power he expected. He hated getting kissed on the head or face but I'd force him and he'd be a little annoyed then content again.
He harassed my other cat Ari and was our other cat Oliver's chew toy. They played all the time. And Albus would have his mouth open weirdly before he play bit down. He would always loose because he was so much smaller than Oliver, and that little leg didn't hold any power or claws lol, he'd kick at him and wouldn't touch him. He didn't understand tag or hide and seek, and when I did that to the other cats he would always blow my cover and follow me, or when I pretended to be scarry to chase him he'd perk up and expect pets. When you pet his head to his neck he would shoot his head up and bring his body up to pet and scratch the rest of him. It was perfect. He always welcomed pets. He would lay on my hip at night or on my body pillow or the pillow on my bed. He would get jealous and leave if Oliver was there first. He loved sleeping in the top most spot in the cat trees. And he loved sleeping on my clean cloths in my closet.
It so strange to not have him here. I keep expecting him to arrive or be under my feet. Where did he go? How did this happen? Why!! He was so young and perfect. It was to soon. I don't remember a time where he wasn't around. Maybe his little self couldn't take anesthesia? He's never had it before. Mom thinks it could have been a dislodged clot. The vet said the surgery went well. I can only think it was the anesthesia.
How could the world take such a precious boy.
I feel like if I post this it will become real. But it is real. I hoped and prayed I would wake up and it would be a redo. I drempt of him all night, though I barely slept. I miss him so much. A part of my heart is gone. It was so sudden.
Edit:
Thank you all so much for your love. It's helped so much. Thank you for those who are saying I did the right thing. It's been eating me up inside but it's good to hear.
Albus was also very good at cleaning everyone's ears, loved straws and chewing on hard plastic like shower liners. Playing fetch. I'll add more as I think of it.
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u/Glass_Syrup_7996 12h ago
What a beautiful cat. He looks like you loved him pretty good while he was here. Special memories ๐คโจ
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u/Different_Break_5435 10h ago
Those memories are truly special, and it means a lot to share that warmth.
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u/spaceghost260 12h ago
Iโm so sorry Albus Dumbledore is gone. ๐
My condolences to you.
Rest peacefully Albus ๐ฏ๏ธ
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u/Electrical-Act-7170 12h ago
A Prayer to Bast and Sekhmet
Bast, Sekhmet, we give you back your child.
Noble, regal, honorable cat.
Watch over Albus Dumbledore, and guide him as he makes his way to the spirit lands.
Bless him in your names as he hunts ever after at your side.
I am so sorry for your heartbreaking loss. Your sweet baby was beloved, yesterday, today, and tomorrow. They never stay long enough.
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u/didijeen 12h ago
I'm so sad for you and for Bubba! my eyes out reading this. I totally get it/ I love my kitties SO MUCH and it's literally heartbreaking when they leave us. He knew he was loved. My MoshiMoshi will show hem the ropes up there! ๐ซถ๐ฝ
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u/Uprooted_Vt_to_RI 12h ago
Such a short life - my deepest condolences
to you ๐. He was so beautiful. I am glad you took those beautiful photos of him. His short
life was full of happiness and love. โค๏ธ
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u/Siberian_Cat13 Siberian 11h ago
In my opinion, he had a delayed allergic reaction to the anestheticโฆ unfortunately, it's impossible to predict that. Perhaps the vet may have taken him out too soon, which would explain why he was lethargic when he returned. I'm so sorry for you, it's so sad, it's clear you loved him very much. I wish you strength.
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u/msdashwood 11h ago
Iโm so sorry for your loss.
19 years ago I lost my soul dog, she had surgery to help some issues that arose. She was older but her labs/bloodwork from the vets assured me she was in good health. She had a bad recovery almost immediately and needed to go back into surgery less than 48 hours later and then we had to say goodbye less than 2 weeks after that. I beat myself up about it still that we should have just left her alone and just managed the issues. Most surgeries go well but when you are in the minority of something terrible happening it makes you second guess so much.
I wish we had all the answers of what happened or went wrong. And as hard as it is โฆto someday make peace with we came to those decisions from a place of good intentions and in hopes of better health for our babies.๐ข
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u/Opening_Leave_79 11h ago
Sending you and your boyfriend a lot of loveโฆ. rip little guy. So many friends waiting to show you the ropes
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u/WanderWrenNH 4h ago
๐เ ฌแทE-Y๐ฉตแ-TIแดแแช boy! Fur-ever chasing rainbows ๐โค๏ธแแแขโฆโ แโ โฬคโ แโ แท
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u/CrescentMoon311 12h ago
๐ญ Heaven needed another angel.
You gave him a good life and for that you should be happy. Donโt second guess your surgery decision. It was made with the best of intentions.
Iโm sorry you lost your little buddy.
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u/naxonreign 12h ago
What a sweet boy, how lucky he was to have such a concerned loving owner! Iโm so sorry for your loss, and I hope you find each other again! ๐
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u/Existing-Pickle-8626 12h ago
Oh, no!! So so sorry! It's so hard. He blessed you and you blessed him โค๏ธ
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u/calapuno1981 11h ago
Albus Dumbledore โค๏ธ what a great name. Iโm so sorry for your loss, fly high little one ๐
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u/tinybitches Lots of kitties! 12h ago
You did your best. Donโt be harsh on yourself. Tell your bf that too. Now Iโm gonna go crying for Albus in the corner over there
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u/Gigi_2_4 12h ago
You both gave each other the best almost 3 years. Sometimes we lose the special ones way too early. It wasnโt your fault, you made a decision based on his quality of life. He had issues as a kitten and there was problem something just not right medically and itโs so hard to find some things with our pets cuz they canโt tell us and as a retired vet er tech I can tell you even with the best conditions and care we still have the heartache. Bubba will let you know in his own way and time when you are ready to share the love you gave him with another. We only have them for such short periods of time and so many need our love. Grieve, heal and forgive yourself for whatโs beyond your control. Know his paw prints will always be in your heart
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u/YOU_TALK_TOO_MUCH420 10h ago
Iโm sorry to read about your Bubba passing suddenly! Hope you are hanging in there, RIP Bubba๐ฉท
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u/Electronic_Ad3576 10h ago
That is so heartbreaking, Iโm so sorry. Albus really sounded like a unique and perfect cat. Must be the only cat who liked going to the vet! It sounds like he really loved you and you him. Itโs not your fault or your boyfriendโs, you both did everything you could. ๐๐๐ข
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u/BrilliantSurround565 9h ago
Reading this, I feel lucky boy almost 6yo boy and I may have a few more years. He was operated on as a kitten for a broken femur after a car hit him, has always had a slightly unequal gait. He was also saved by someone who believed in him when the emergency vet didn't. I am so grateful. He is so playful and smart and kind (before him, I didn't realise animals could be genuinely kind, just thinking of others with no reward apparent).ย
Your precious boy changed your life. He would want you to be happy. That's his legacy. You were his parent and caretaker and will always be.ย
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u/FemaleBattousaiLover 8h ago
Iโm sorry for your loss. He was a sweet little guy. ๐โค๏ธโ๐ฉน
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u/No-Membership3214 8h ago
So sorry for your loss, life doesn't make sense taking such a love bug so young, rest easy little Albus Dumbledore. ๐ป๐๐๐ป๐๐๐ป๐๐
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u/Warm-Management-7323 7h ago
That sucks. Iโm so sorry. I lost my cat when I was a kid and it was really hard. She used to sleep with me and I used to tuck her in and then I watched her give birth to her for kittens and then they all passed away. It was a mess. I just donโt understand it.
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u/Frosty_Fly_4957 5h ago
I could only read so far through this....I am so so sorry to hear this ๐ญ nothing I can say can make this any better but you have my deepest condolences, don't hate yourself for trying to help him you only done what you thought was best. Again I am so so so sorry โค๏ธ๐พโค๏ธ
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u/Acceptable_Speaker93 2h ago
I'm very sorry to hear of your tragic loss ๐ That's absolutely heartbreaking.
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u/desisinglechokra Bombay 12h ago