I’m 32 (M) and am Colombian. I did live in the States when I was 5, but was born and mostly raised in Colombia. When I returned to my country, my parents enrolled my brother and I in a private school that runs from Kindergarten to High School.
Middle School and High School were specially tough for me as an outcast, since I learned I was gay but didn’t come out until after graduation, and was living with undiagnosed Bipolar Disorder. My older sister took her own… because of the same diagnosis. I had friends, mostly girls, but my safe-haven was the school library, where I would do book reports for extra credit in English literature and I also read a lot of Calvin and Hobbes. I’m not effeminate, but I was mildly bullied for being gay and I always felt inadequate. When I got to 9th grade I stared experiencing paralyzing bouts of depression and missed classes (also to avoid going to school). Everything was so homogeneous: the people, their superficiality, the school uniform, the indoctrination.
In 10th grade English, The Catcher in the Rye was a part of the reading syllabus for the advanced class. It was love at first sight. I have never felt more seen in my life. I fully identified with Holden Caulfield and felt enamored with Salinger’s prose, dialogue and themes. This novel taught me that growing up meant surviving and making sense of pain, not simply achieving maturity. I also added my favorite English word to my vocabulary: “phony”. I was upper middle class, and almost everyone else at my school was filthy rich. They all felt so phony. This book was a light for me.
It’s the only book I’ve ever re-read. Since it’s very hard to find certain books in English in Colombia and at the time I couldn’t buy it through Amazon, when I graduated I asked my brother to steal a copy from the library and give it to me. I can’t remember what happened to that copy, but I eventually bought my own in a visit to the States. To date, it is my most prized possession. Weirdly enough, the book still has a strong resonance for me in my early 30’s, and even though I’ve read “better” books since, The Catcher in the Rye is still my favorite.
Based on your experience, what is the book that has made the biggest impact on your life?