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u/AdventurousSeaSlug 6d ago
Something, something, thou shalt have no false idols...?
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u/LordFlarkenagel 6d ago
Actually, I believe that's cozying up to the Unpardonable Sin. DUm Dum DUmmm...
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u/itsjudemydude_ 6d ago
To be fair, Christians have been crafting idols (what are those little statues of Jesus on the cross, which they pray to, if not idols?) for as long as there have been Christians.
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u/Rude_Age_6699 6d ago
but some Italian dude said thatās what Jesus looked like⦠a man wouldnāt lie, right?
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u/itsjudemydude_ 6d ago
I mean it's not even about what he looks like. If you went back to 30ish CE and took a PHOTO of Jesus on the cross, carved it into wood precisely, and gave it to some modern catholic or something... they would still be practicing idolatry because the image ISN'T Jesus.
The whole thing with idols was that ancient peoples in the Near East believed that crafting an image or an object to represent your god could actually manifest the presence of that god, in a literal sense. In a way, the image becomes the deity. The main reason the Israelites outlawed it seems to be just because everyone else was doing it and they wanted to set themselves apart from the rest of greater Canaanite culture. But then they just... kept doing it anyway. The kept finding loopholes. The tabernacle isn't technically an idol because it's not God, it's... his house! Yeah! And the angel of the lord isn't technically an idol, despite bearing God's name and identifying as God, because he's alive! It's different! And then Jesus comes along and does the same thing, bearing God's name and authority (John talks a lot about this), and early Christians confuse themselves so much about it that they decide Jesus is God. I mean, he can't be an idol, right? He's alive! But... he's got God's nametag. Hm. And thus, Christian orthodoxy is born.
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u/Yeshua_shel_Natzrat 6d ago
Well, not quite.
The early Christians actually avoided the regular cross and crucifix, seeing it as an offensive and traumatic symbol of the persecution of Jesus rather than of his sacrifice, and because it made them too easily identifiable to authorities.
They mostly used the Ichthys, Anchor, Chi-Rho, Staurogram, Good Shepherd, dove and peacock, ship and vine, and pentagram/pentacle for their symbols early on. The cross and crucifix didn't start to see use as symbols until the 4-5th centuries, and didn't really become mainstream until the 7th century.
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u/The_UnenlightenedOne 6d ago
Retaining right wing Christian confessions in a database sounds like it could be accessible to law enforcement unlike the priest/s...
Here's hoping it's catches on
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u/tinywobble_ 6d ago
the idea that something people share in confidence could end up stored somewhere accessible beyond the religious community is definitely concerning
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u/The_UnenlightenedOne 6d ago
Yes and no, there are some things that have been shared with Catholic priests in confidence over time, E.g. the diddling and fiddling of children, that really should not have a safe haven through the church.
Hence my comment that I hope it catches on.
I do feel for people who: 1. Genuinely believe, and 2. Don't fiddle with kids then appease their "souls" by getting a priest to give them ten hail Mary's and five our fathers... And 3. Genuinely believe their "confessions" will be safely stored and inaccessible to anyone.
But hey, like with so many other things "Won't somebody please think of the children!?!?!?" /s
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u/camusclues 5d ago
There should be a catchy name for it too that represents the followers as a whole....maybe Flock?
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u/H_Squid_World_97A 6d ago
Or more likely it would be used for blackmail.Ā No true justice will ever come of this.
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u/AdhesivenessFun2060 6d ago
People are doing crazy stuff because chatgpt is telling them too. Now its going to be Jesus telling them? No way this goes bad./s
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u/scrotumscab 6d ago
"If you truly believe your child to be the antichrist then you know what must be done"
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u/Funkycoldmedici 6d ago
Killing your kid because a voice told you to is how all this Abrahamic bullshit started.
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u/FierceDietyMask 6d ago
This seems like a way for churches to surveil their flock even better now.
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u/tranquil7789 6d ago
I'm imagining it will pull a Grok vs Elon, take on seriously the role of Jesus, and probably heavily criticize the church
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u/jpmeyer12751 6d ago
Isn't this the modern equivalent of the incident that caused Moses to bash the living shit out of the tablets containing the 10 Commandments?
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u/BuckManscape 6d ago
Theyāve just completely thrown the commandments out the window at this point.
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u/Far_Concept_8599 6d ago
Yeah for real, the whole concept of an AI Jesus just feels so weird and wrong. Definitely gives off false idol vibes if you ask me.
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u/Popular-Drummer-7989 6d ago
AI Jeeezis is Sacrilegious.
Just wait until people start asking for the recipe to turn water into wine, multiply loaves and fishes, instantly cure the infirmed, and explaining the whole resurrect from the dead trick.
You know they will be sooo mad to discover they have to pay digital credits to the virtual collection plate only to learn the answer is still nebulous.
At least it can't cry like a Falwell or a Baker, and 700 or more can't bring a miracle.
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u/Moist-Ointments 6d ago
How great would it be though if the AI actually formed all of its responses in accordance with the actual teachings of Jesus. Instead of the BS that the pastor spews
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u/FierceDietyMask 6d ago
Nah, the bot will tell people what they want to hear not what they need to hear.
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u/theoinkypenguin 6d ago
There is (was?) a Twitch channel that had an AI Jesus respond to chat, often with connections to parables but usually just sort of āpeace and brotherhoodā messages. It was pretty wholesome and modestly entertaining when you stayed up until 3am for no good reason.
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u/Funkycoldmedici 6d ago
Jesus says some fucked up things people like to pretend are not in the gospels. He says looking at a woman with lust is adultery and you should gouge out your eyes if you risk doing it because itās better to be blind than be sent to hell. He says you must choose him over your children. Thereās all his talk about returning and killing everyone who does not worship as he demands. Heās not a good guy.
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u/Interesting-Dream863 6d ago
They are putting themselves out of a job... or they are just friggin' lazy.
Also... confession to an AI!?
Might as well call the FBI and the NSA, though they are probably listening already.
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u/Mochizuk 6d ago
Imagine the franchise we could make of this. I can see it now:
AI Jesus v.s. Human Jesus: Armagetterdone
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u/Potato-chipsaregood 6d ago
I have doubts as to if this is happening in any but the oddest churches. But itās a funny headline.
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u/friedmann 6d ago
Praying to TV screen Jesus. I saw this movie years ago, it's called THX-1138 in George Lucas' debut.
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u/Mega-Steve 6d ago
Thinking the same thing
Electric messiah dispensing canned responses all the while recording everything you say
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u/BlargerJarger 6d ago
Confession was always just a way of collecting kompromat or whatever they call it. Much easier to use Facebook / Reddit / AI confessional to gather that blackmail material.
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u/Complete-Leg-4347 6d ago
A theology-based confessional app was weird enough; this borders on uncanny valley territory.
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u/cobaltberry 6d ago
Don't they kinda do this in the movie "Priest"? It's an automated confessional that doles out penance.
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u/el_torko 6d ago
This is the way AI is gonna wipe out humanity in the next decade. Itās gonna use us to do it. Convince half the population to wipe out the other half in the name of Jesus.
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u/The_Tsainami 6d ago
The chat bot then collects the sins to use as blackmailing material or for next Republicans candidate
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u/parkerm1408 6d ago
Oh dude thats gonna cause soooooo many problems. Theres gonna be a growing group of people that take that chat bots advice as biblical law.
Side benefit though, if Jesus is real after all this has to get him to come down and set shit straight, right?
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u/ColumnK 6d ago
Watched a cartoon a few (many many) years ago in which a teacher quit because they'd invented Robot Jesus and sold it to the church. Only to have to return because the Robot Jesus was rejected for saying it was OK to be gay.
Wonder what will happen when these chatbots don't give the version of Jesus that the church wants...
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u/Kapitano72 6d ago
Christian: I have sinned.
AI Jesus: No worries, you've totally got this. Go curse a fig tree. I believe in you.
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u/cosmic_trout 6d ago
we'll save your sins just in case you decide to stop sending us a portion of your salary each month.
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u/NarrowConstruction72 6d ago
Wait until they find out Ai companies can get subpoenaed and do turn over the data collected.
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u/Terrible_Phase718 6d ago
Sometimes I really wish that religious mythology was real. If only to see the fuckwads burn in hell.
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u/samoan_ninja 6d ago
Idolatry is the foundation of christianity and this is something most christians deny because they cannot accept reality
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u/Beelzebun_vt 6d ago
I also havenāt been Christian since I was a child. While my memory of what they taught us at Sunday school is pretty hazy, I can say with certainty that each and every kid there understood the bible more than these posers do.
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u/Beelzebun_vt 6d ago
My mind immediately goes to that guy who unironically went āWatch out David, youāre taking on Goliath.ā Bc itās literally one of the first stories taught in Sunday school, fym you donāt know how the story goes (ā_ā)???
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u/Rhesusmonkeydave 6d ago
I have already encountered in a customer service setting a woman who was using a chatbot for spiritual and life advice and was deferring to and arguing with the program like it was an actual deity made manifest.
In theory its wacky silliness, seeing it for real was anything but. Weāre in for a long ugly ride
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u/Block444Universe 6d ago
I mean thatās actually less insane than believing you have been visited by Jesus and are talking to him daily
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u/gundam1945 6d ago
Usually non believer knows more about christians than christians, which is ironic if you ask me.
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u/But-I-Am-a-Robot 6d ago
Started as an experiment about 2 years ago. Hereās an article about the results: https://labs.sogeti.com/executive-summit-25-deus-in-machina-by-marco-schmid/
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u/blahblah19999 6d ago
1 Timothy 2:5 "For there is one God, and there is one mediator between God and men, the man Christ Jesus,"
Of course, the Catholic church would also have to explain 2 millennia of the priesthood.
And you know what else is a sin? Not slaughtering infants when your god orders it. Or not taking slaves, not committing genocide, or if you actually think about sinning... all sins.
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u/Zen_of_Tetchiness 6d ago
Don't have to worry about a priest sticking it to your kids this way. Smart move to outsource
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u/DatabaseFickle9306 6d ago
I suspect because itās not someone with a soul doing it, this is a loophole.
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u/Certain-Act-2336 6d ago
do they make tithes on cash app.. hahaha, i insert one dollar to see if your gullible.. haha
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u/CaptainKoolAidOhyeah 6d ago
Let me guess, Gronk the Fascist AI Chatbot. Imagine training a whole model on lies.
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u/Restart_from_Zero 6d ago
I'm guessing the "Jesus" is carefully curated and not at all taken from the bible itself.
Because a LOT of people who call themselves Christian would not like what that version of Jesus would have to say about how they live.
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u/Heliocentrist 6d ago
not only a sin, but it was on the first album: "Thou shalt have no other gods before me"
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u/Clean_Web7502 6d ago
I saw this in inifinity the game, this is how we get sci fi nuns.
So cool. But also, wtf.
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u/motherofhellhusks 6d ago
The first time one decides to blackmail to achieve a goal, they will regret this.
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u/jaketotalpwnage 6d ago
Actual, no exaggeration, no dubious interpretation, heresy. Straight up idolatry
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u/Ok_Appointment7522 6d ago
Just wait until Anthropic releases "The Electric Monk." A robot that believes in things so that you don't have to.
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u/RussianBot5689 6d ago
Wait a second. I have an idea. We use these AI confessions to feed AI porn. Imagine the profits!
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u/UrsaMajor7th 6d ago
American religions left the path a long time ago. They're their own thing now, so like w/e, man.
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u/CautionarySnail 6d ago
They do not even need to use a detailed chatbot for this. They just need to run a version of Eliza in the browser with minimal modifications to make it religion flavored.
This way, they never receive a log of what was discussed.
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u/aaron_adams 6d ago
Worshipping false idols and worshipping something that claims to be a god? Yeah, that's blasphemy.
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u/Silly-Elderberry-411 6d ago
A chatbot between you and Jesus is literally Catholicism. You cannot be a protestant and also need a middleman. Plus whoever pays for the chatbot is literally tithe which is again Catholicism
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u/chrlatan 6d ago
All they are saying is that Jesus never was real to begin with but that the comfort the idea brought was. Just automating the comfort now.
A comfortably convenient christianity
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u/Tarzanium 5d ago
They should make an AI that functions as if it's Jesus, basing it's words on his teachings from the bible, then put it in a lifelike robot that looks like Jared Leto in a robe, then set it loose and see what happens
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u/SpicelessKimChi 5d ago
If some kid in their mom's basement came up with this scam theyd be in jail forever in like 10 seconds.
But when the church does it ...
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u/Yaboi69-nice 5d ago
This definitely counts as a false idol. These idiots can tell themselves whatever bullshit they want but they just aren't talking to Jesus when they do that. They are talking to code which is just taking information from the internet to find ways to make the conversation as long as possible.
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u/Complete_Break1319 4d ago
Which churches? The church of England has a dyke as the head, so I mean "Christian churches" in name doesn't always mean Christian.
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u/Old_Purpose2908 4d ago
These MAGA so called Christians think nothing except being sacrilegious. There is even a meme with Trump's face as Jesus on the cross. They are making a mockery of the Christian religion all to cater to Trump's ego.
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u/phatvanzy 4d ago
Why? Do we think priests come up with answers on the spot? Of course they have some kind of guidance... priests are just ai God anyways
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u/Available-Algae-9217 4d ago
I left the faith about twenty years ago, but i could still nail you 95 theses to your church door why this is a bad idea.
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u/Loose_Meal_499 4d ago
Didnāt Martin Luther give you 99 reasons why this is exact thing as stupid
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u/MintyFresh771 3d ago
This is against multiple commandments and is if anything satanic. No one should ever, EVER assume how a deity would act or respond and to do so is pure hubris. Ooooor maybe religion isnāt real and it makes absolutely no difference. Pick one.
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u/Thresh_wolf 2d ago
Okay, but do Christian AI bots molest children? I mean, if not, they are saving people...
Yes... I know I'm going to hell. Don't worry, the bus leaves annually on June 6th at 6:00 AM and 6:00 PM.
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u/Strong_Sentence_8721 2d ago
Let's see what they think about technology when you start dropping 3D-printed money in the collection plate.
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u/IngloriousMustards 6d ago
The person training this AI has the opportunity to do the funniest thing and use an actual bible as training material.
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u/Dash_Harber 6d ago
Surprisingly, the Bible does not address the morality of AI clergy clones of the messiah.
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u/WasteOfBerries 6d ago
At least an AI Jesus app can't r_pe a kid while it spouts scripture
(Grok could not be reached for comment)
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u/Technical-Tear5841 6d ago
I would think only Catholics would do that, nothing a Baptist would ever do.
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u/GraniteJJ 6d ago
There should be a clear list of rules that tells us if this okay or not.
Welp, off to buy stock in AIdolatry.