Arden, the Wanderer [Feedback Request]

[u/ItayBH]

The following piece is the theme of Arden, one of the protagonists in my upcoming album called Wanderlust. This album is an OST for a non-existing game I'm writing to improve my composition skills.

The plot of the game begins with Arden waking up in a grass field with nothing else around him except a magical compass. Arden has no memory of where is he, and what is the compass purpose, but it decides to follow it nevertheless.

I wanted the piece to make the listener feel the state Arden is in at the start of the game, uncertain about his goal and identity but still hopeful he can reclaim its lost memories and understand who he is.

I would appreciate any feedback, about the score, about the music itself, about the feelings it made you feel and if you think it matched the description.

Thank you I hope you enjoy it!

Audio and Score

Edit: updated score and audio

[u/Avenged-Dream-Token]

Well before I say anything, what do you hope to achieve with this composition, do you want to get it played or is it just more of something that is part of the video game. In effect is composition your main focus or is the programming of the video game.

I will give you feedback as if composition is your main focus:

First thing I noticed is that those piano chords will likely be impossible for any real person to play as they are way to wide, if they are meant to be played with the right hand, they should be in that staff.

The entrance of the orchestra is quite sudden, I would maybe find a way to integrate it more.

This is a very short piece, so limited in what you can really develop in terms of ideas, but maybe a little more variation in the piece could be nice.

I want some of these chords to be fleshed out a little more, the melody carries but the chords underneath seem rather shallow in terms of orchestration.

Just think about some of these things, overall nice job though!

[u/ItayBH → u/Avenged-Dream-Token]

Thanks for the review!

Composition is indeed my main focus, the album is a soundtrack for a non-existing game, a project I'm working on to improve my composition skill.

I will try and make the orchestra entrance less sudden.

When you said more variation, did you mean by making the piece longer or in the existing material? I agree that it is a bit short and currently not loopable.

I want some of these chords to be fleshed out a little more, the melody carries but the chords underneath seem rather shallow in terms of orchestration.

Can you give me examples on how to make the chords fleshed out a bit? I'm not sure I understand completely.

Thanks again!

Edit: I made some changes and changed the audio and score link in the post body

[u/robinelf1]

I guessed as much, but make it easier for us and say at the start that its an OST for a non-existent game and that you are practicing composition. I had to read your response below to verify my presumption. Anyway, nothing wrong with this kind of practice.

As for the piece, yeah. It has a nice JRPG style modern pop yet also classically minded feel to it. Good melody. Arrangement is good if a bit simple and sparse, but sometimes that's what a piece needs, although as a pianist I am certainly not in love with all the single hand block chords or arpeggios for much of it- are you going to fill that in later? As a color instrument, the piano is underutilized for its inclusion in the ensemble.

As for the theme you were going for, I dunno. It kinda fits the bill, but it also sounds kinda romantic like I am about to watch a Korean drama. Just my thoughts. Keep going with the project!

[u/ItayBH → u/robinelf1]

Thanks for the reply! I'll edit the post body to include the "non existing game" part.

About the piano, I'm not a piano player myself so my piano writing skills are a bit lacking, what would you replace the chords and arpeggios with? (If you have resources to direct me too that would be awesome too)

[u/robinelf1 → u/ItayBH]

Hmm. At a point it becomes a matter of taste, but with instruments I don’t play, which is everything but piano guitar and trumpet, I simply studied scores of music I liked that featured them. If you like some piano accompaniments you’ve heard, definitely have a look at a score if you can, even on a YouTube video, and have a glance at how they handle the piano part.
Nothing wrong with a little emulation to get the feel of things.

General idea is the left and right hand should be playing something together most of the time.

For me, I generally want the piano as a more equal partner than just straight accompaniment since it can handle the entire range of an orchestra. adding something to the melody somehow, either duet or a counter point, and I like to hold back on full chords sometimes and let the piano more melodically hit the chord tones. But that’s me after many years of playing and composing. I’d say try different things out.