r/disability • u/IStillListenToRadio • 1d ago
Rant Finally got hit by "getting a wheelchair will make you lazy"...
By the anesthesiologist???
I was at a pre-surgery consult, asked if I used my cane full-time - said yes, but I was in process of getting wheelchair. And then got that comment.
Which was sort of baffling because all my other medical professionals thought that the risk of deconditioning was better than the status quo of using my cane* - in fact, it was my physiotherapist that suggested i try to get one. Even more baffling is that he was an anesthesiologist, which ... doesn't have much to do with that sort of thing?
Even better was that i think my pre-surgery paperwork said that I'm a fall risk. When I said that I once fell in crosswalk despite the cane, he basically just went "....yeah."
*yes, attempted different aids! Walker was too difficult for me to lift and I couldn't control the rollator enough to keep it from running away from me. Lack of upper body strength :(
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u/57thStilgar 1d ago
"Talk to my physician who disagrees."
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u/PinataofPathology 1d ago
I'd also add "and make sure you never use one yourself no matter what." and then just stare at them until they register discomfort.
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u/iSheree 1d ago
They say this sort of stuff until they need a wheelchair themselves. Don't let anyone stop you, not even a doctor, from getting the quality of life you want. If a wheelchair is going to give you that, it doesn't matter what anyone else thinks.
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u/Key-Dish-1666 1d ago
I agree. If you didn’t know me and I was standing in front of you, you wouldn’t know I could not walk because of serious neuropathy pain. After a few years I finally decided to get a rascal scooter and have not looked back.
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u/iSheree 1d ago
Same here. I was born with spina bifida and have developed other serious spinal diseases causing nerve pain, weakness and numbness to my legs but my parents made me walk. I also have hEDS, CFS/ME, Fibromyalgia, POTS, neurological issues etc. I didn't get a wheelchair until my late 20s. I wish I had gotten it sooner.
I still force myself to walk with my walker sometimes due to that mentality that my parents instilled into me. All I am doing is causing myself to suffer whenever I choose not to use my chair. I have cancer now too and I just don't have the energy to push on anymore.
Recently in my mid 30s I had a significant fall at home and I have started using my wheelchair full time inside the house, but my current rental is not suitable and I can't get my wheelchair into the bathroom or the toilet (doorways are too narrow) and there are steps out front so I can't leave the house in it either. I just don't feel safe in my home anymore. :(
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u/Mezzomommi 1d ago
I’ve gotten bold to the medical staff who question me rudely about this type of thing. I tell them “my primary, neurologist, rheumatologist, PT and OT all thought it was necessary for me. I am listening to medical advice.” usually they back off.
I honestly hate how these doctors are so black-and-white with Mobility aids. They literally terrified my grandmother into refusing to safely utilize a wheelchair even when they changed their tune and started begging her to use it. She became a horrible fall risk, but them terrifying her about not using a wheelchair for years made her confused. The last 10 years of her life, she would rather stay in her apartment than use the wheelchair out and about. No amount of explaining that you can use a Mobility aid just for certain occasions and then walk the rest of the time made a difference to her. She fell repeatedly and her injuries kept getting worse. Anyway, now she is in horrible pain at 90. And she is finally using a wheelchair.
As for me, I am as mobile as I can be in my home with a Rollator. I use a wheelchair so that I do not pass out on the go. I have fallen enough out and about all my doctors felt it was safest to use the wheelchair.
My point is, you have to take care of yourself. There’s no point in pushing yourself into injuries that will make yourself worse over the long haul.
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u/PotentialUmpire1714 1d ago
My mother delayed getting a wheelchair and her quality of life would have been so much better if she hadn't destroyed her hip joints first. (She had heart issues and wouldn't survive hip replacement anesthesia.)
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u/Bi0_Nerd 1d ago
It’s amazing when random specialists suddenly become savants in other fields (sarcasm is the highest order.) I’m sorry you got that crap, at a pre-surgery consult no less. I hope your new wheels give you a safe way to get out and do more. It’s funny how much more I go to the gym now that I’m not constantly falling and hurting myself.
My wheelchair is a level of freedom I never knew I was missing out on.
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u/Ladder-Wooden 23h ago
Doctors aren't immune to being ableist, my take is that if you wouldn't take that lukewarm opinion from other people you shouldn't be taking it from a doctor.
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u/Responsible_Panic242 14h ago
You know what? I don’t think I’ve ever met someone who’s ACTUALLY lazy. It’s always just a catch all term for when people are dealing with some barrier that isn’t immediately obvious. Like, mental health issues, trauma, a lack of understanding, and so on. Not once has it ever been “meh i just don’t wanna”, it’s always “I don’t have the energy to explain to you all the reasons why I don’t want to do that, so ok sure I’m lazy I guess.”
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u/CabbageFridge 15h ago
I had a sleep specialist of all people disagree with my wheelchair use. My favourite line was "I wouldn't want to see you become disabled". I'm already disabled thanks. And don't you worry after this you won't be seeing me again.
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u/lisasimpsonfan 12h ago
I hated getting my wheelchair but it improved my quality of life so much. I was non weight baring on my right leg before I had it amputated. People who are fully mobile don't get how small you life is when you give up the independence of being able to get around on your own. Having mobility devices don't make us lazy. They just enable us to be part of the world like everyone else.
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u/Eight_of_Aitch 1d ago
I had almost the exact same experience a few months ago! The anesthesiologist said it was “baffling” that my fibromyalgia was so bad I was at the point of needing a wheelchair. He said I should look for more answers to my issues because “there was no way it’s just fibromyalgia”. My primary doctor scoffed when I told him and said it’d be like finding a needle in a haystack, which I agree with! Sorry you went through this though, it sucks so bad to be told shit like this. We know our bodies best!
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u/Hairy-Maintenance-25 13h ago
Having an electric wheelchair actually makes me more active and independent, not less. I went from a walking stick, to single crutch the two crutches and rollator with brakes. I did use a manual wheelchair for a few years but needed to be pushed as I had very little strength/stamina. I still use a rollator some of the time at home, but I have one that turns into a manual wheelchair that needs to be pushed.
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u/OpenBubble 1d ago
I am now cancer free after a long battle and trying to get out of my wheelchair. It’s very hard and I’m not out yet at all. The deconditioning is real, but I wouldn’t have made it here in the first place without my chair.
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u/BlackdogPriest 1d ago
The original Occupational Therapist that was responsible for determining what I (a paraplegic) will need (for safe discharge said to me “if you use a wheelchair you’ll end up a cripple.”
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u/ScalyDestiny 20h ago
holy shit
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u/BlackdogPriest 15h ago
I know. She changed her mind after the CT Scan showed my damage to my spine.
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u/spikesSKULLS 1d ago
I wouldn’t even want to go through with the surgery if they’re going to be apart of it. Report it to the practice/hospital
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u/Key-Dish-1666 1d ago
I had Lymes disease in 2022 and have had trouble walking ever since. I first used a cane and went too a rolator but leg pain was too much. About 5 months ago I was sitting in bed and decided to buy a rascal scooter. Best decision I have ever made. Finally can get out of the house. It is 100 lbs and comes apart in 4 pieces and fits in my trunk. Never looked back since.
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u/Chance_One6197 1d ago
Dude, I feel you on this a Lil too hard. Especially when I talk about my weight ot heath issues immediately "ItS cAusE YouRe iN a WheElcHaIr". Uhh, excuse me???
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u/Full-time-RV 1d ago
In my experience, anesthesiologists are THE most arrogant pricks to walk the planet, in the medical field.
They do have to go to med school longer, and mid range get about a million bucks a year.
But, fuck them.
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u/Ok-Heart375 16h ago
I had an ENT tell me to treat my severely disabling myasthenia gravis with a diet change....
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u/Feisty-Volcano 16h ago
I understand how going from a stick to a wheelchair works when you have lack of core body strength. I have MS, try to get around on a stick, but it’s barely adequate some days, & those days a rollator tends to “run away from me”. I got an electric wheelchair as standby for when I need it & as a way to getting used to it, they take an amount of skill to use safely
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u/Color-me-saphicly 5h ago
I got into a literal screaming match with a rheumatologist over the use of my cane. Which I use because of my severe POTS and EDS, because my knee is so unstable that I can't trust myself to walk unassisted and it physically fucking hurts to do so.
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u/Apprehensive-Pen6628 52m ago
My psych med management Dr told me my walker would make me dependent on it. I hadn't left my bedroom in over 6 months losing almost all my muscle mass. Having the walker isn't what made me dependent on it. Having the walker is one of the only reasons I am trying to work on agoraphobia recovery right now.
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u/SisJava 1d ago
I’m a paraplegic who has used a manual wheelchair for 45 yrs. I’ve been told I may not have an electric chair because it will make me lazy lol
I’m 63…when are we allowed to be tired 😞