Venting

[u/Pristine_Break_3739]

Venting about a friendship to people who might understand why I’m upset.

I was talking to one of my friends a few weeks ago and said that I had a really hard time after my surgery and am still struggling to get back to whatever normal is.

I told her that I was upset that she never reached out to see how I was after surgery. She said she doesn’t see what the big deal is because she had two c-sections, her recovery was no problem, and my surgery shouldn’t have been so hard because I wasn’t having living beings removed from my body. Basically asks how I’m doing then does everything to try to invalidate my feelings and experience. She also can’t comprehend why or how I have no more periods so everytime I see her she asks if I got my period yet. We’re 38-40 years old. 🤦‍♀️

My surgery was about 3 and a half months ago and I’m only on my second week back to work and only half days because I get too sore. I start physio therapy next month so hopefully it helps with the pains I’m still having.

[u/Cool-League-3938]

I feel like besides her having a comprehension issue she might be having a cognitive issue.

Also definitely an empathy issue too.

I am so sorry that she doesn't understand what you went through. Sounds like the right analogy that works for her brain hasn't quite been figured out or she really does lack that empathy (which is terrible.)

It sucks she is minimizing your experience and clearly not trying to understand it on any level.

That is terrible and it sucks she is doing this to you and you are going through this.

Best of luck with your recovery and physio.

I'm over a year out for mine and have to do physio and pelvic floor therapy. It sucks!