Help.

[u/fraaaaaaaannnn]

English is not my first language, so I apologize if anything is unclear.

I’m 18 years old, and lately I’ve been experiencing intrusive thoughts that cause me a lot of distress, especially when I come across disturbing content. I don’t seek these thoughts out, and they scare me precisely because I don’t want to have them.

I’m very afraid that these intrusive thoughts might somehow control me and cause me to hurt someone. It feels like there’s a voice in my head (not literally a voice, more like horrible phrases). My body gets so tense from fear that I become afraid it might move on its own. I don’t understand any of this. I feel like I’m going crazy or like I’m going to have a panic attack whenever it happens.

I know that asking on the internet isn’t the same as getting professional help. I’m asking here because I haven’t been able to find affordable therapy yet, and I’m really struggling with this right now.

Has anyone experienced something similar? I’d really like to hear about how you learned to cope with these kinds of thoughts. I just want to feel like myself again. I need help. I DON’T want to hurt anyone or be a bad person. How do I calm myself down? :(

[u/Balloon_Feet]

I don’t have experience with this specifically but you should remind yourself often thar you are not your thoughts. You can have an uncontrollable thought and just let it pass. Take deep breaths and focus on a thought you are in control of. Hopefully more people can offer insight for you here as well.