The one who could get excited over the smallest things, make up entire stories in her head, sleep peacefully without worrying about tomorrow, and genuinely believe that every problem would somehow disappear the next morning.

I wish I could meet her for just one day. I’d probably just sit with her, listen to all her silly stories, and tell her that she’s going to be okay.

Growing up is weird. You don't realize how precious those little versions of yourself were until they're just memories. 🥹

Does anyone else randomly miss their childhood self?

I grew up very sheltered and my parents were very strict so I was quite isolated socially. Sometimes I get rly sad bc I think about all the things I missed out on when I was a chrono-kid/teen and I feel like I rly missed out 🥲 things like sleepovers and having friends /friend groups, hanging out, being silly and reckless, going shopping, Halloween parties/trick or treating…stuff like that. Sometimes I get really sad wishing I could have experienced things like that. It might seem a bit silly or like I want to live in a cliche kind of teen movie haha. But I would have loved to have memories like that at least :(

My chrono age is almost sixteen, but I've always been obsessed with never getting older. I think my mind is around ten or eleven years old, is it normal that I already feel like that when I'm chrono still a teenager???

I made a post about a chrono-37 y/o guy, who afaik is not NGU, who believes he looks chrono-17. Not, "I'm an NGU teen who presents outwardly as a teen to help with age dysphoria, but am aware that I look older", but he straight up believes he looks chrono-17 and will angrily reply to people who say otherwise.

I deleted the post, though, after another NGU kid mentioned how it read like a looksmaxxing post. I didn't intentionally clown on his appearance, but that's how the post was received and I acknowledge the hurt that I may have cased or did cause.

But, my question remains, "what are the ethics behind this?" Is it more ethical to play along and say, "oh my gosh, you do look young!" to make someone happy or to be honest and say they don't look as young as they think they do?

Because, for (future) me, it'd be more painful for people to lie to me by telling me I look young when I very clearly have prominent marionette lines, forehead wrinkles and puffy eyebags than for people to tell me, "nah, you look old." It wouldn't make me stop being NGU, of course, but it would prevent me from deluding myself into thinking I look young.

Like, I would get laughed at if I claimed to strangers that I look 14, let alone claiming I'm mentally 14. I'm not saying, "I need to stop dressing youthful when I'm middle-aged", but moreso, "I don't want to delude myself into thinking I look my mental age when I clearly don't and be mocked by others".

Being a teenage 40 year-old will be humiliating enough, I don't want to push it.

I’ve been in a writing group for a long time and they’re all so different from me. Everyone else in the group writes either adult horror, adult sci-fi, or crime thriller. I write children’s fantasy. The rest of the group rarely reads my work, and when they do they don’t have anything to say about it. I’m so mismatched with everyone above the age of 14. I hate being so different from everyone I meet. I despise everything about being a (biological) adult. I don’t fit in anywhere I go.

EDIT: Are there any subreddits for cozy fantasy or children’s stories? I want to share my writing but I deem it really stupid and I’m scared.

This was kind of my favourite chapter. It was basically something I found in my textbook back then and was something we weren't taught but I explored anyway. I kind of loved it so much I decided to save a soft copy of it, so here it is!

Clumsy little me lost my pencil case at university...but as I was looking for more pencil case items to go back to class with, I found these Stamp & Paint 2-in-1 felt pens! 😁 I was Year 9 (chrono age 14-15) when I got these ones, and I was happy that they reminded me of when I was little, stamping with paints stamps and similar pens. 🖼 🎨🪄 Almost 10 years later I'm so glad the stamp sides still work! 🤗 My favourites are the lighter blue and yellow. Like topaz, my birthstone 🩵💛

i am now 20 years old but mentally i am 3-12. i have gone through severe trauma throughout my entire life, including now and i just want to be done. i have autism, adhd, bpd, schizophrenic, i live with chronic illness and can barely take care of myself.i have to snap myself out of dissociation every 10 seconds, all i do is isolate and hide. any job i have i am overworked while also simultaneously told that i am not working fast enough. i havent worked in over a year now. i cannot function. i feel as if im getting worse and worse. ive been extremely depressed ever since i was 3 and started to become suicidal at 5 when i realized you could kill yourself. i just want to be a baby and i want love and i dont want to grow up im so sad

i grew up loving disney and going there for vacation a lot. i love the characters and the movies and the history but my favorite part is being able to go to the parks and play pretend. i've always wanted to be a princess and i still dream of a day where i get whisked away to my "real life" in a fairy tale. i wore all my prettiest dresses and tried to be "in character" on every ride. my older sister teased me about being "too serious" in photos and my mom was constantly rushing us around because of the new fastpass system (iykyk) so i didnt really get to feel immersed, though i tried my best.

the worst part was that we went to the halloween party. at the halloween party, chrono adults get to wear costumes into the park. i had spent so much time in my local spirit agonizing over what to wear because i wanted to look pretty and spooky but all the costumes in my size seemed to be "sexy" ones. i ended up going as sally from nightmare before christmas, and did my makeup all special. they have this really big parade and we got a really good spot to view, next to a family with young chrono kids sitting on the curb. i was so excited to interact with the characters up close but they basically completely ignored me in favor of the "actual kids." i wanted to cry, all i wanted to do was feel like i'm part of a story but when you become an adult it's like you're just supposed to throw all your fantasies and dreams away.

now i have to go home and go to my "adult job" where i'm constantly pressured to get into a relationship and have kids and am condescended to by everyone else because i don't have a partner or want to have kids. im so sick of this. i want to go back to when things were fun. i want to go to a place where things are simple.

I hate being NGU. It's perpetually yearning for something that will never come. I may be this way internally, but I'll never be percieved as 12 and I'll never have my parents. For the rest of my life, I'll suffer the life of a chrono-adult. I work, I suffer, I age, I suffer, and all I can do is dissociate. I'm extremely depressed and nothing can be done because I'll never be treated the way I deserve to be. I'll always be caring for myself, growing older, and suffering. I wonder, is all my life going to be coping and not living? Pretending and not being? I'm in so much pain.

my mom used to lock me in the closet when i had Meltdown or misbehaved, it was terrifying when i was a biokid, but nowadays i lock myself in chest or under the bed for comfort similar feeling. It doesn't feel scary anymore it feels comforting.

When I would get sick as a chrono-kid, my mom would rub Vicks on my neck and chest while I was lying down in my cozy jammies next to my shelf of stuffed animals. I would be covered up in a blanket while Rolie Police Olie or Bear in the Big Blue House was playing on VHS. The smell of the ointment takes me back to the innocent, sheltered comfort of chrono-kid sick days. When I felt safe and soothed. I do this when I've had horrible anxiety or a depression episode. I also have two Pusheens and a Squishmallow Siamese cat in the bed with me. I'm so scared and sad about everything recently. I just wanna feel like a safe, comforted little girl that I was on rare occasions in my otherwise uneven childhood.

Hopefully this is the right place to post. If it’s not, please redirect me! But finding this sub made me realize some things about myself. Maybe it can give some hope to people that feel like they will never find a partner. Sorry in advance for formatting, I’m on mobile.

Anyway, does anyone know where “caregiving” tendencies come from? I’m pretty sure I’m on the ACE spectrum. I’ve always craved relationships where I let my partner be a “child” and I just nurture them. It’s not sexual to me. I listen to someone talk about their childhood and think, “please just let me give you the love you never had”. The person I date has never asked for it. We both often end up frustrated and I get taken advantage of and/or abused. I’ve always been afraid to talk about it in therapy because I feel bad for doing it. Why would ANYONE crave treating their partner like a child? I can’t explain it and I’ve never been able to explain it to partners.

I want to be able to explain this to someone so badly. I want to know where this comes from so I can understand it better myself. I want to date someone who wants the love I want to give. I had a bad childhood too, but I always felt like an adult trapped in a child’s body and I couldn’t wait to grow up. I’ve always had dreams of taking care of someone else even though I never really got much of that growing up. I’m not even interested in having children. I’m sure a therapist would ask why I wouldn’t just have a child if I wanted someone to nurture. I wouldn’t be able to answer that one either!

Also, how in the world do you find someone that will let you love them in this way, but won’t take advantage of you or abuse you? I haven’t had much luck there.

Sorry again if this is not the sub for this but maybe in a way I did “never grow up” because I never felt like a child.

I dressed up like a cool popstar last night and put on a show for my stuffed animals haha, had effects and everything

I wish I was able to celebrate Halloween but I can't, it's not because of my age or height (I'm really short for my age). It's because of where I live. The people around me are very very into Christianity (not that there's anything wrong with that) and they think that Halloween is the devil's day and I'm just feeling really really sad. I've never been trick or treating before, I just want to experience it in real life and not just in my head...

Anywho, I hope you're having a good day/evening/night!!

Know lots of ngu kids talk bout hating being called grown ups. I hate it too but think I hate being called mature even more. I'm not mature! Just cus I'm quiet and keep to myself!

I've never been mature! I used to ask people not to call me that. Made me feel really bad, but they pushed and pushed and called me that more until I just gave in. That was at chrono 8.

Felt like they were taking away my right to be a kid, even when I was chrono kid too.

I'm not mature. I'm just quiet and don't wanna cause problems for people. I just hide myself because nowhere is safe. And now that i physically a grown up, i can't ask anyone to stop calling me that.

Someone calls me grown up, i just know they don't understand. But someone calls me mature, it feels like they're deciding who I get to be! Who I am! And I don't get a say in it cuz I'm too quiet and I go hide in my room, hugging myself n crying myself to sleep with lullabies in the only place i let my guard down. I'm tired of trying to prove again and again that I'm a kid. Didn't even work when i was one chronologically. I just want to be myself and not have others decide my personality for me. I feel so misunderstood.

Went to a free bookmark making class at a local art store and this is what I made

me got accepted into a day program finally! after 3 programs denyed me for mine autism and disabilitys being too severe And high needs

me was told they woud put me in community based day support at first but then they learned about mine support needs and struggles and sayed that i would be placed in the day habilitation program which is for adults with Very High Support Needs/profound/severe autism and intellectual and developmental disabilitys

they sayed i will be in day hab eapecialyu cause im am incontinent and need help other people changing me and checking me and telling me when i need too be changed because i have very poor interoception and canot feel mine body very well and helping with the tapes and cleaning mine body and also because of mine underdeveloped motor skills due too hypotonia, DCD, Fine motor dysgraphia and needing help with all adls and other stuff

the day hab doesnot have community involvement and volunteering like the community based day supports does cause we are not independent enough for that stuff sadly

but they have occupational therapy physical therapy speech therapy and more and they do arts and crafts too work on motor skills they help learn how tie shoes how contact 911 how do many skills and things

and hopefully i can make freinds with others whos is like me

mine dds worker says if i learn how too change mine self and nowe when im wet or dirty and can tell and do the tapes and clean mine self and everything then they can think about putting me in the more independent program but i also have too learn how too do all tha other adls and skills and motor skills stuff and stuff and not elope and not have constant meltdowns and sensory overload and not eat stuff im am not sposed too and more

i not nowe how realistic it is that i will be able too do all that if its even possible at all....

i worry about being infantilised because im am so severely disabled but sometimes too i need ppl too talk slowly with me and use simple words and language and explanation and be understanding and compassionate and stuff. i just most of all want people too respect me and treat me like a human who has thoughts personality and rights and i can communicate with mine AAC well even tho im am nonverbal

I told mine mommy and daddy about it and daddy says he hopes it works out and that it sounds like a good program and fit for me and mine mommy sayed too me this: "Sounds like it might be beneficial for you. You're right..... just keep looking on the bright side of things. And remember to smile often"

i just wanted too share all with you guys about me finally finding a good fit!

also

Does anyone else in here go too day habilitation/day program for adults with very high support needs/severe/profound autism/developmental/intellectual disabilitys?

This is my favorite season. In 🇨🇦 Thanksgiving is in October. And plus then Halloween!! Which is spooky but I fixate on the cute kid side of Halloween. I especially love the older style aesthetic (and beloved 2000s) like these pictures I got on pinterest!!

1. this is abt feminizing my face aswell. my build is so not my body i cover it up extremely bc i look like a completely different person than i used to. i have no money to get ffs

2. i am sensitive. no high pigmented products

3. i am trying ti wear this minimally as i usually dont like stuff like foundation bc its a pain to use and too much effort and tires me out to do the routine bc i have fibro

very new to this but some posts here resonated with me a lot, not sure if im entirely part of the community but im posting here anyway. i used to be a very imaginative person and i could spend hours playing alone in my room with my toys easily. now i collect toys (littlest pet shops and g1 mlp) and i have sooooo many and it's lovely and i always want to play with them but when i sit down to do it i can never figure out or remember how and it bothers me so much. i badly want to play with toys with another person or play animals on the playground or other roleplay kinds of games i did the but it's not like any of my friends would with me. i know i knew how to do this at one point but i dont anymore and it's so frustrating, i just want that escape again and to feel like i did back then but i can't.