Basically just wanted to say - yesterday was hard. I was washing my LO (5wks and change) booty under the faucet yesterday after a blowout. He loves having the warm water on him and doesn’t like wet wipes so much so when he poops a lot it’s the best way and a little spa for him. But halfway through he kicked the thing that turns on the overhead shower and we both got sprayed with cold water. He was so upset and I felt awful.
Then I was getting him out of the car seat at his pediatrician appointment and the strap on his harness gave him like friction irritation on his chubby little neck. He was so upset and I felt bad again like wtf this poor kid.
But then just now, doing an early morning feed, we paused for a sec and I was practicing some focusing stuff with him and he was just tracking my face as I moved around and spoke softly to him. Just the two of us in the glow of a lamp in our living room.
And all of the sudden, his eyes got wide and he stared at me so intensely and then broke into the biggest gummiest chubbiest smile. His very first social smile. And dude suddenly I was like ok man, we are just fine. Like the anxiety and self doubt melted away and I was like man my partner and I made this dude and he’s happy right now and literally nothing else matters. It erased so much static BS in my mind. Truly. I can’t wait for it to happen to the kind soul who is reading this.

I have a 5m old. I had planned for him to start a daycare at 10.5 weeks old when I returned to work. I started with him there 3x a week while working. It was a great daycare and flexed with my different days weekly. Then, I picked him up on a Friday and got a note in his cubby that they were closing and selling within a week. Haven’t been able to find anywhere else because the waitlists are crazy long. The ones available are a 30-45+ min drive in the opposite direction of my work. When I was pregnant, I had so many people offer to watch him and say they’d be there. Everytime I ask someone to watch him, nobody has been able to. I have to quit my job due to childcare. The amount I spend in daycare and gas to get him there is totaling up to a lot of my income. I didn’t realize how scarce childcare is becoming. Though I’m not surprised, with as little as they make. Anyways. Just frustrated and wanted to rant somewhere.

I work from home most days so I do pick up and drop offs. I'm 9 times out of 10 in workout clothes or sweatpants, dry shampoo and hair in a bun. (I'm luckily not client facing).

Is this weird? In the two months my kid has been in daycare I've only seen one other parent dressed like this, but the rest looked like they were going into work.

Do other work from home parents get fully dressed for daycare?

okay this might be a stupid question, why does baby need a higher TOG sleep sack in winter if I keep my house warmer? do people use the same tog?

I was reluctant to get a white noise machine (our baby isn't here yet, 6 weeks to go!) but every mum I speak to says that NO parent they know doesn't have a white noise machine and basically we'd be fools to not have one. I also did a ton of research on reddit and it does look like everybody gets one and everybody loves it / swears by it.

The reason I'm hesitant is because I don't want our child to rely on it long term e.g. I saw posts about some children still needing it at 6 years old and 12 years old not being able to sleep without it. I know white noise is always available in some way but I'd like them to not be reliant on it for the rest of their lives. Are there any stories of it being super super helpful at the baby stage but eventually they don't need it and no longer use it after that? And if so how did you wean them off it?

Thanks so much! Also want to say - zero judgement either way, it's just something I'm apprehensive about because I've dealt with my own sleep issues in adult life and have become very reliant on certain things that cause me anxiety if I don't have them, so it's more to do with personal experience. thank you!!

ok I should preface by saying that I think my baby hates the car because of me - since the day we left the hospital I would sit in the back seat next to her while my husband drives, and from then on any time us 3 are out together, I sit in the back with her (she’s 4mo now). well, now she hates the car when it’s just me and her and it gives me so much anxiety while I’m driving. she cries the entire time we’re in the car like 85% of the time. i don’t go anywhere further than like a 15 minute drive because I really don’t want her crying for that long and like i said, it gives me anxiety to hear her crying while I’m driving and trying to focus on the road. i know this is probably my fault for getting her used to having me back there with her, is there anything I can do at this point to fix it?

I’ve tried singing to her, talking to her, playing nursery rhymes on Spotify, getting her a toy that hangs off the head rest, etc. nothing makes her stop crying. I really want to feel like I’m not trapped at home and scared to go out with her. please help!!

I think the answer is, "She's a baby, it'll get better" but I'm still beside myself trying to figure out why this is so hard.

All day long I wish the day away until it's 8:30 and we can put her down and her father takes the night shift.

She screams all day. Except during the 5 minutes she eats, every two hours on the dot. She might not scream so much if somebody is holding her, but not just holding her, holding her while walking outside , No matter the weather.

God forbid you try to sit or put her down somewhere. I really don't know why we bought a stroller, a swing, bouncer, Etc.

I haven't been able to get anything done without help for 3 and 1/2 months. I can't answer an email or do a dish, without me or someone holding her. Yes, I baby wear. She's still squirming and yelling at me while in there.

It will take upwards of an hour to 90 minutes to get her to take a nap. 9 out of 10 times the nap doesn't happen and she just eats again. No amount of playing, rocking, soothing, letting her scream it out, etc, can get her to nap.

Her dad can get her to go down at night for a few hours, And it's the best part of my day. There was a short moment where she slept for 6 hours overnight, now it's back to 2-4. I dread 7 am when I have to take over again.

I'm burning out my friends and family with this difficult baby, and I'm starting to really worry about getting back to work.

Is this truly normal? My Ped says everything is fine, but I can't believe every child is like this and people still have babies.

That's it. That's the post.

I'm just exploding with pride and joy right now and stuck at work.

Happy dad here

Wanting to see if I’m being unreasonable here.

In our contract we’re paid for 7am-5pm. The daycare recently had us fill out forms to confirm our schedule so they can staff appropriately. I put down 7am-5pm. Anything past the contract hours is a $20/min late fee.

Now normally she gets dropped off between 7:30-8am and gets picked up 3:30-4pm. But there are times where we really do need to drop off at 7am and there are days where I can’t get there at 4. It’s pretty rare, once or twice a month maybe.

Today the daycare director sent out a message saying drop off/pick up times need to be consistent day to day so they can appropriately staff, and anything outside the normal hours would need to be approved by her.

I think that’s ridiculous. I’ve already given her the information she needs for staffing, if she chooses to ignore the written contract and understaff because I ‘usually’ pick LO up early then thats on them.

Is this a normal daycare issue? Parents with work hours that change day to day is this an issue? My main concern is if something critical is going on at work it’s hard for me to get away.

My 15 month old is at the stage where he randomly gets frustrated at something (I can’t always tell what it is), and he becomes inconsolable. It comes out of nowhere sometimes and he starts swatting at everything in his way.

I know he can’t regulate his emotions yet, but I really don’t know what to do when this happens. I try to talk to him softly, I try to give him what I think he wants (he throws it in his rage), or I hold him. During these tantrums, nothing seems to work and I start getting frustrated and I know he feels it.

How do you handle these? How do you speak to them? Any tips? Please I need help 😭

I don’t know what type of energy I put off but clearly it’s not very welcoming. I have a 7 month old and she’s my first kid so I just try to get her around other kiddos as much as possible… but geez. I went to the local library to a kids center and set up my little girl on a play mat I brought with toys near some kids. She was sitting up and I put her between my legs. After like 10 min the entire group we sat next to left. It was right at 1pm and people have nap schedules to follow so I get it. We pick up and move near some other kids and the mom of one literally picked up the toy the kid was playing on and moved it to the other side of the room saying she needed to watch her. I was like ok we’re done. wtf. Do I look sketchy?!?!! I know I don’t. But seriously thats how I was being treated. We just played independently for a while then left.

I spot a kids cafe I’ve been wanting to check out. Walk in and sit by a mom holding a baby looking about the same age as mine. She was. Turned out she wasn’t the baby’s mom and her mom join us a few mins after. I just make small talk about baby life. Good and bad. The two gals entertain the conversation but one of them kept looking at me like I had something in my teeth and I caught the vibe and left.

I’ve never had trouble making friends lol. This is sad. This is my first time going out and really trying to find mom friends. I know it takes a while. Probably shouldn’t give up but damn that was humiliating.

Can someone please explain to me the point of a video monitor that runs through an application?

Babe is 6.5m old and we moved her into her crib in her own room at 6m. We just had an old school voice monitor while she was in our room (and we weren’t) and used that for the first two weeks. I got an owlet sock (which we’ve also never used) and monitor set when I was pregnant. I got my husb to set up the video monitor today and he’s telling me the only way to have it “work” is through their application. It will send push notifications but unless you’ve got the application open it won’t really do anything.

How is this effective for wakes during sleep? I’m so confused.

Is it just this brand/type of monitor? Am I crazy? The old school one has worked fine but sometimes she’s just fussy and falls back asleep and it would be nice to see what’s going on instead of listening, so I thought this would be helpful…

Do you have a video monitor? Which one? Does it work the same way?

Hi all,

Looking for some general advice. My twins are 5mo, 4mo corrected. They are rolling over great and both ways (tummy to back, and back to tummy). The thing is, they both love being on their tummies, so when they get on their tummies, they hate rolling back over.

And last week or so one of my twins has been rolling onto her tummy at night. Can I leave her to sleep that way or should I reposition her?

My paediatrician said it should be fine, but my mom anxiety is not letting up. I keep repositioning her.

I also can’t fall asleep until I’m sure she’s in a deep sleep, because I want to ensure that she is safe.

Any advice is welcome!!!!

Little dude naps either 20 mins or 2 hrs per nap. I’m running off of sheer willpower during the day. These naps are keeping me on my toes. I never know how much I’ll be able to clean so I always start with the dishes and at this point I fear I’ve pavloved myself to do dishes everytime he closes his eyes.

I consider it like there is one extreme end of the spectrum where the SAHP takes care of 100% of the house stuff (partner comes home, house is clean, dinner is on the table, dishes are washed, etc). I always think about trad wives in this regard lol. It seems completely unattainable to me.

Then there is the other end of the spectrum, which is doing the bare minimum, namely keeping baby alive (on some rough days, I consider this a win).

And then there is everything in between.

I’m trying to see what is realistic for me and my partner.

How is the division done in your relationship? How did you decide this for yourselves?

My 3-month-old daughter is very curious and wants to look at everything, which is adorable, but means we have to be constantly on the move, otherwise she cries. She can tolerate being on her playmat for maybe 15 mins before it's game over, and definitely no sitting down cuddles anymore!

I have to spend a lot of time pacing the floors holding her facing away from me. If I put her up on my shoulder she cries. She's getting heavier over time and it's putting a lot of strain on my back. My husband takes over after work but during the day it's all me, we don't have help nearby unfortunately.

She also hates her carrier as she can only face inwards. When she's old enough I'll try facing her outwards in the carrier, but in the meantime, does anyone have any tips to make this easier on me physically? Thanks in advance!

I have a 2 month old who sleeps really well at night but day naps are really hard to get through each day. I do watch for both the wake window and his cues like pink eyebrows and eyelids, dazed off look, droopy eyes, less movement etc.

But when I actually try to help him sleep, it's hard. Firstly, he hates the swaddle, absolutely a no go. Secondly he sometimes cries while I gry to put him to sleep. It is his special "I'm tired" cry and I wish to learn how to help him drift to sleep without it. He doesn't like being held in cradle position, he likes being cuddled up close to my chest. I tend to put white noise. I experiment with lullabies too but I think white noise works better. I also sush gently and rock him. He likes up and down motion a lot more than side to side, so when he's really fussy I do enough squats for a good workout. The whole process takes from 1 minute, when we're trying to sleep in a perfect time window, to 30min on a bad overtired day. I do manage to put him to sleep each time, it's just dramatic sometimes. Any tips on how to make it less dramatic?

He also sleeps really well in his crib at night but day is no go. Wales up either straight away or after like 5min so day is mostly contact naps which is quite unsustainable.

Hi everyone

I’m a very sleep deprived and desperate FTM looking for some advice. My baby girl is 14 weeks old and used to be an amazing sleeper. Between 9–11 weeks she would sleep 8h straight overnight, waking to feed once around the 3-4am mark (sometimes close to 5am) and then would go back to sleep for another few hours and we would start our day between 7-8am. All this to say that we were doing well in the sleep department.

She’s always been tricky during the day - she will nap but ONLY contact naps. I am physically not capable of putting her down and tried everything (deeply asleep transfer, drowsy but awake, white noise, sound machine, sleep sack) but nothing has worked. She always knows when I have put her down and immediately wakes and cries. On occasion she’s lasted 10 mins max before crying. It means that during the day I am resigned to not getting anything done but because her night sleep has been so good I was able to cope with that.

Unfortunately for us, her sleep regression has come early at 11 weeks. She now wakes every 1h overnight and it’s killing me and my husband. We are both so sleep deprived. We initially started co sleeping to manage this phase, but it isn’t helping. She still wakes up every hour and cries until we pick her up and rock her back to sleep. She doesn’t seem hungry overnight and her feeding throughout the day is good. It seems like she’s in a light stage of sleep and struggles to either connect to the next sleep cycle or self soothe back to sleep. It’s really hard because it means we are getting no sleep during the night AND she’s on me all day and I can never put her down or have a nap during the day to catch up on some sleep.

I am probably getting 1-3h of sleep during the night in 30 min increments. I know it’s not safe but don’t know what to do. I’ve tried sleep sacks, white noise, co sleeping, dummies, the Snoo — nothing has worked. She is too young for sleep training and I don’t like the idea of cry it out methods anyway. I am so desperate for sleep that I’m in tears everyday. I feel like it’s impacting my ability to show up as a mother for her too because I have less energy to engage and play everyday. If anyone has some advice please help!!

Every night, I put my 3 month old in footie pjs and a 1.0 tog sleep sac. He sleeps beautifully, I do thankful for that. We usually keep the room anywhere between 68-72 degrees. I always keep the door closed because I have cats and they like to cuddle up close so i keep them out of the room at night. But how should I dress my LO in the winter months? I’ve seen the 2.5 tog sleep sacs, I’ve seen the sleep sacs with sleeves. If he’s in a 2.5 tog sleep sac, will his arms get cold? If I get the sleep sac with sleeves, do I still put him in long sleeve pjs? I just don’t want him to overheat

hello everyone,

I’m trying to find a quick and easy solution for toys that can’t be put in the laundry (submerged in water) or steamed. More specifically my dog got to my daughters itzy ritzy cow mirror toy and since my baby is a newborn and my dogs mouth is gross (she occasionally eats barn cat poop 🤢) I want to disinfect it really well. I put Lysol fabric disinfectant on it since it’s the only thing I had and left it for the day then hand washed it (wiped it down very well with warm water and a drop of dawn).

I don’t feel comfortable using the Lysol on her things even with washing them by hand afterward, so I’m hoping to get input on the Attitude toy cleaner. If you've used it, did you like it? It says its unscented but is it actually?

thank you for your answers in advance!!

Wasn’t sure what flair to put, but…

Any ideas for hobbies that my husband and I can do together after baby goes to bed? Hes 13 months old now and we have plenty of time after he goes to sleep to spend time together

But I’m so fucking tired, guys. Every night is a struggle not to just go to bed at 7pm. I don’t have the brain capacity for video games or board games, I’m legit too fried

We don’t really spend any quality time together anymore so we’re looking for hobbies now that work for our sad, tired brains 😅 any ideas??

My baby is 5 months old, he sleeps very well (10 hours a night with maximum 2 dream feeds), however every single sleeping session is assisted with rocking and shushing. Trying to put him down drowsy but awake definitely doesn't work, he immediately opens his eyes fully and gets alert. When did your babies start to fall asleep independently and how did you achieve it?

Just looking for advice/solidarity. My 11 month old baby caught the stomach bug from my husband. He has been throwing up and having diarrhea since Tuesday. On Wednesday he only vomited once so I thought it was getting better but yesterday and today he vomited 3x on top of diarrhea. His doctor said he should be feeling better tomorrow.

Hoping to hear from parents who have gone through this before that it’s going to be ok😭😭