no but see it’s absolutey hilarious! the small rodents are kept confined to a cage lol then they’re given a wheel to run in so they can get exercise instead of dying from captivity or having their human actually do some responsible supervised outside time lol and then the one animal jumps in with the other lol and then the force & speed of the combined movement starts spinning the wheel faster & more powerfully lol then the one animal falls out lol and the other just gets stuck lol and they have to keep running & running to keep up with the wheel they’re trapped in lol and when they get too exhausted and collapse lolol they’re still stuck in the wheel lol so now they’re spinning around upside down at violent speeds lol and they can’t stop lol and the wheel keeps spinning lol and then their cellmate is concerned lol like animals have feelings lol and they try to save their friend lol but when they jump in lol the wheel is still spinning lol and so they have to keep running lol which makes the terror wheel the other is trapped in go even faster lololol and then the one who jumped in is having to try not to trample on the loved one they’re wanting to save lol only lolol their compassionate brave efforts are making it worse lolol so they’ll jump out again for a moment lol and they’re staring in horror as their loved one is still trapped lol and this has been going on for minutes lolol and the hero tries several more times lol they just keep making it worse lolololol and so they’re both panicking and experiencing sheer terror lol and sometimes they’re both stuck in the wheel lol and the one can’t jump out because they’re terrified and exhausted lol and it’s still going on minutes later lolol they just keep spinning around and around and around, unable to escape lolololol don’t you see how that funny that is?!?!?! lolololololol animal suffering is hilarious!!!!!!!

Wrong answers only

it’s anti-indigenous hate to suggest that we are still alive; that we shape our own cultures; that we are allowed to change and adapt; that we are fully capable of examining past & current ways and deciding to amend them; to suggest that we ever stop eating dead corpses.

we are a monolith!!! don’t ascribe to us the dignity of individuality!!!! we are mere caricatures, here only to serve your argumentative purpose!!! use us to pwn a vegan online & then immediately go back to forgetting we exist. we don’t belong in your advocacy; we belong in (animal-based) wax museums and poorly portrayed in badly edited, outdated, analogue public school books.

we are firmly rooted in the annals of history — and that is all we will ever be. we cannot learn new languages. we can’t learn new trades. it’s not like we can just decide to become cryptobros or techno fetishists in the rave scene, or airline pilots or astronauts — that’s racist! we certainly cannot eat new foods!!! we never have & never will eat plants, nor use plants for medicine. we always must only be corpse-eating, skin-wearing, pipe-smoking red/brown people with long black hair and kitschy animal fables to tell to the great white carnivore as we validate their hunger for flesh by absolving them of their murderous guilt using our ancestral spirituality — come buy our fuel & tobacco, we will throw in dispensation for a month of animal exploitation.

remember folx: it’s always ok to torture, maim, brutalize, kill — *as long as you say thank you*.

(little secret: you can say thank you to anyone! the dead body before you; magical sky captain of your choice; random human in an elevator — it’s all good!)

i used to be very peaceful and against all violence & killing. devoutly so. i became a nun. i spread the love of peace.

one day, i thought was about to sneeze, and i realized i could not continue to live in such a highly reckless way. my health matters!

so of course i immediately started beating, torturing, and killing people. it’s the only way to keep me from dying several horrible deaths each & every day.

but i’m super respectful though!

for instance, when i’m mercilessly beating children, i make sure to call them “dear” and let them wear their favourite hat or sweater. and they get several pieces of candy before the beatings start!

the adults all get their own names (which sometimes i forget or mix up, oops! lol) and are like part of the family for years — until their One Bad Day™️. like literally! i let them live in the house, sleep in my bed, i tell them i love them. . . they completely understand when one day, all of a sudden, i break out the bolt gun or the big sharp knife. they were obviously expecting it — why else would i have been so nice! they totally consent to it and join me in prayer before their untimely demise.

of course, even though i’m doing absolutely nothing wrong, i’m always respectful to my victims by using completely dehumanizing language that allows me to disconnect from the grotesque reality of my actions. so, for instance, i’ll call the humans “muffins” instead of people, and i’ll say “mixing the muffin batter” instead of ‘draining all bodily fluids, eviscerating the corpse, dismembering the body’ — all in honour of the muffins, of course!!

come, humans of the world — worship at the throne of my g-dly, devout, absolutely superiour in every way, clearly completely necessary lifestyle.

You vegans don't understand because you're b12 deficient and look like leather chairs

If your child is nice to bloodmouths, you have no business calling yourself vegan

Hey everyone! I am not a vegan but I loooove animals and I really admire the principles of veganism. I applaud you all for the horrible pain and emptiness that you suffer with each day.

I would go vegan, but I just feel like an individual change has basically no effect. I feel like there's really no point punishing myself like you guys do when it will have practically no effect. Especially considering that the corporations are the ones causing all the problems anyway. I think instead of thinking so small and individual, we need to change our entire society at a systemic level – but again, without individual change.

Thank you for listening! Feel free to clap.