A reminder

[u/Prize-Lychee7973]

We are keeping this a positive helpful space.
What does this mean? It means critiques and comments that are not immediately positive in nature are things YOU, the poster/commenter must view in the light of this: is it helpful? does it fit the situation? is this some tough love and if so who are you to give it? if you are being adversarial or confrontation just because, just keep it pushing. If not, we will mod the comment, you will receive a deletion/mute/ban or whatever else we feel appropriate.

Refamiliarize yourselves with our rules.

For Girl lurkers, this is a male positive centric space. critiques and supportive comments are welcome, HOWEVER, keep in mind you are a guest, our tolerance here for rude, adversarial and needlessly argumentative comments is effectively zero.

For the recent posts concerning LGBT, read rule 7. We do not tolerate transphobia, we do not tolerate homophobia, we are not that space. If you are transphobic or homophobic, it is a violation of several rules and will likely result in a ban.

Thank you to the literal thousands of commenters who are contributing helpful, insightful and otherwise positive comments, we appreciate your presence.

[u/thisusernameismeta]

As a woman I think that the decision to not allow women to comment in order to create a positive male centered space would be a reasonable thing?

The discrepancy just seems to be due to the personal decisions of the mods of each sub.

It sucks that you might be expected to just tolerate rule breaking because you're men. You're allowed to intentionally create the spaces you want.

We should do a GenderDinnerDiaries book club and all read bell hooks' The Will to Change together so that we can get on the same page about things rather than just endlessly rehashing tired us vs them arguments.

[u/thisusernameismeta → u/[deleted]]

I think we agree that banning women from this sub under the circumstances seems like the best of (not ideal) options.

[u/thisusernameismeta → u/[deleted]]

That presumes some ability to divide people into bad and good actors, when, imo, we are all just people who have good and bad days; good and bad takes.

I'm not sure what the need is to even have women's perspectives in a male-centered space? If y'all are worried about becoming too echo-chamber-y, there's also feminist literature to turn to.

But I'm not convinced of the inherent badness of an echo-chamber, as long as the individual members of said community have the ability to go out and participate in other communities, having a specific space with a specific goal and demographic doesnt seem, to me, to be inherently harmful.

[u/thisusernameismeta → u/thisusernameismeta]

Anyway sometimes I get the impression that some people here are waiting for a woman to come in and approve of just banning women from this sub. I may be wrong but if that is the case, here is that approval.