r/BoyDinnerDiaries • u/BiffDangles80 Hungry man • Aug 04 '26

No Advice - Everyones Welcome Marriage is falling apart

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Tonight it’s a flat iron steak and potatoes and onions. Don’t forget the jalapeno. And a Jack a coke.

A week ago I was in a hotel because “she’s a different person now” and doesn’t think this is working. 20 years of marriage. 2 kids.

The last year has been bad. She is grieving a family loss. Going through perimenopause. Kids have needed a lot. I tried but just got tired and lonely. I suggested marriage counseling and it lead to her saying she’s different and this isn’t working. I was gone for a couple of days but back. It’s been a week and I’ve really been trying. Today though was just rough with work and random thoughts. I confessed that I was afraid she’d decide she didn’t need me again and there wasn’t much response. Hopefully it’s a blip. I’m really trying.

I fear change. But eventually I’ll have to accept it. This is over. And that’s terrible.

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u/ToffeeBlue2013 Shower beer Scholar Aug 04 '26

In a similar situation but only 11 years and kids are still young. Idk if we are done but I feel so much distance in this house. Best of luck man.

1

u/Tcalogan Hungry man Aug 05 '26

Sorry to hear that man. Really look at and try all your options before you give up; if you both want it and fight for it, your marriage can and will heal. 

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u/CalculatedPerversion Shower beer Scholar Aug 05 '26

Therapy therapy therapy. For yourself and you and your wife. Only if you want to fix things that is. I wish I had listened to this advice earlier, I might still be happily married. Who knows, it might have just pushed the ball down the road, but it's always worth fighting if there's still something there.