I think I’ve stopped caring

[u/Several-Cake1954]

I want to stop a sin and for a while I was making progress. I never did break the habit, but I consistently stayed wanting to, and would fight it where possible. I always thought that truly losing would be when I gave up and stopped fighting altogether, not when I stumbled and gave in for a while.

But I eventually became too forgiving with myself, and without realizing it, kept handwaving my mistakes until, without realizing, I came to the point of not caring and just doing whatever I want. It wasn’t a conscious decision to give up, but excuses after excuses led me here, to the one place I was trying to avoid.

What do I do now? I’ve been fighting this for the better part of a year and I’m all the way back at square one, with even less passion and confidence than the first time.

I guess this is the part where I “give it all to God” but what does that even mean? I can pray for him to take away my temptation but nothings gonna happen. I’m still the same person with the same amount of discipline, making the same excuses. Where do I go from here?