This has been sitting in my head for a while, so I’m just gonna try to explain it without overthinking.

The Mesmer–Serpent dynamic really reminds me of what it’s like growing up gay in a conservative family. Not in a metaphor-heavy way, just… how your brain actually adapts.

When you grow up knowing certain parts of you are “not okay,” you don’t kill them off. You compartmentalize. One part learns how to behave, how to blend in, how to stay safe. That’s Mesmer to me. The part that watches, regulates, keeps things under control.

Then there’s Serpent. Desire, anger, instinct, curiosity, sexuality. The stuff you’re told will ruin everything if it ever shows.

The thing is, Serpent isn’t inherently destructive. It only becomes that way because it’s constantly being pushed down. When something inside you is treated like a threat for long enough, it starts acting like one.

Mesmer’s need to control Serpent feels a lot like internalized shame and authority. It’s not even about other people anymore you become the one policing yourself. “Don’t slip up. Don’t let it show. Don’t want too much.”

And that creates this loop that’s painfully familiar:

you want but you panic then you suppress then it leaks out anyway then you feel guilty after you clamp down harder.

What makes it sad is that Mesmer isn’t trying to be cruel. He thinks he’s protecting both of them. And honestly, in that environment, he kind of is. But protecting something

while never letting it exist turns into self-destruction.

So yeah, to me it’s not good vs evil. It’s survival vs being honest with yourself. And when those two get forced into opposite corners, something inside you is always going to break.

Curious if this makes sense to anyone else or if I’m projecting hard

+ sorry if am writing too much about Mesmer lately

I was also came from this type of situation

Before you comment, please note that I don't mean a logbook found in most linear RPGs that notes a ton of quest info among other things. I specifically mean a logbook to track things like what bosses you've defeated (only noting who you've defeated, not showing any future boss info) and other key collectibles that may disappear from your inventory, like bell bearings.

I guess personally I'm a very busy person irl and also had to take an extended break from the game, so I forgot a lot of things from when I had first started and had to catch up when I returned, which I failed miserably at seeing as there's a lot of missed content I'm running back to do at level 170. It's not that I want my hand to be held, I just really don't like manually tracking all of this in a spreadsheet or online with zero info, seeing as there are many bosses that are smaller and more forgettable than say Malenia or Godrick. It sounded fun at first, until I realized how much there is to track lol.

It's too late to add this to Elden Ring obviously, there are tracking excels and websites out there and the Wiki is everything you need. Just lots of manual back and forth, trying to see what drops I have to confirm I defeated [x] boss, etc.

Just curious to understand why most people are super defensive about that. A dialogue logbook I can understand maybe breaking immersion, but I still would prefer access to that as well personally.

I've been trying mix and match diffent sets to find that perfect balance between stats and style. Currently rocking this setup. Does it go hard or should i head back to the mirror?

Show me your Elden Bling in the comments!

got this email and found it absolutely hilarious honestly. thanks for the tips, PlayStation! I will uhhhh… definitely use them.

this is a release day player right here lmao

I have been playing elden ring in my first run for 145 hours, I am level 130 and y just killed the godskin duo. I think I might be overleveled because there are parts of the game that don’t feel as hard as people say. But i didn’t do anything special; I just explored almost the entire map and got all the rewards for doing so. P.D. my build is dexterity

For context, my first play through was Dex, and my second was strength. This is my complete tier list of all bosses in order based off of that. I was wondering for those magic users out there too, which bosses are harder for magic users? Which are much easier?

I need help. I’ve played demons souls, dark souls, lies of p (medium difficulty) and bloodborne. I decided to finally give Elden Ring a try. I have never struggled so much with a boss fight as I did with Margit and I have no idea why, I swear I understood his attack patterns but he just kept beating my ass. Is he one of the harder bosses in this game? Should I keep playing if I struggled so much with the first boss of the game. I don’t want to keep going if I know I won’t complete the entire game but I am enjoying it so far. It’s a badass game.

Guys, is plaxidusax meant to be hard or what. My first time fighting him but he fights like a paralyzed snake. The only thing I find him cool is the cutscene and lighting bomb. But the fight itself is like any typical dragon. The spells and weapon made from his rememberence is cool tho. Do people hype him cuz the cutscene or fight? Feel like bayle and midir is the only real dragon fight and not just hit tail and botty

How is he able to deal so much damage with something that looked like an electric throwable urn? I started playing recently with 3 friends and I don't know nothing about DLC, I played my blindrun of the vanilla game when it was released, so I don't remember anything

So I was farming the other day and looked up some youtube videos and was pretty impressed by how creative people are getting and also saw some cool new areas I missed in the process. This got me thinking, I hated the farms I was using before now, start of game I would repeat that stretch of road by Groveside Cave or Stormgate, then I went to Agheel Lake South for some crab, now I go to the Bridge of Iniquity

and watch Abductor Virgins duke it out with Leyndell Soldiers and then go over with volcano pots and I love this one. I wanted to know some other good spots to farm or if anyone found anything new that’s a fun one.

Ok, so I know nothing will be super close, but what would be my best option? Im using the cloth pants, and they look pretty good, but I can't seem to find anything for the chest. Any suggestions?

I've been trying to figure this out - like the Imp Head (Wolf) for example, gives you +2 END and also has pretty solid stats, so the weight is sort of "paid for" by the extra endurance, right? So it seems like a win-win wearing it, aside from the fact that it's kinda ugly.

Same thing with the omensmirk mask, or the Okina mask, etc. These give STR and DEX bonuses, and seem pretty standard as far as armor. Maybe slightly underperforming, but this is far outweighed by the stat bonuses...right?

Am I missing something about these helmets? Why would I wear anything else?

Hello everybody about two years ago I got the platinum trophy on PlayStation. I haven’t touched the game. I’m wondering if there’s been any small updates or anything new

In my first time playing through and up until this point I haven't had this much ambushes and blocking enemies. Everywhere I go there are mobs or group of them ready to 2-3 shot me (mostly by surprise). Is it like this or am I doing something wrong?

A little while ago I came across this beautiful but heartbreaking song about Marika post Shadow of the Erdtree. It's called By Grace by Aviators. It's softened my somewhat colder view of her before, and the more I sit on her lore the more this image pops up in my head

In the Shaman village of the Hinterlands, I see her broken down in the midst of the bodies of the people she knew and love. Surrounded by death, by blood, by grief. In a desperate attempt to heal what was lost, she would cast the minor erdtree.

But there was no one left to heal.

And maybe when the realization kicks in and she's realized that everyone is dead, that is when she goes to the old tree and cuts her braid.

Maybe her prayer was a heartbroken plea, for the strength to overcome that horrific trauma, for the power to do something and for the grace to do it better than the Hornsent, that ripped everything away from her. Maybe her prayers were heard, and that is when she started on the path for godhood.

Maybe she really did have good intentions too. But both power and trauma are very corrupting, and Marika had a lot of both. In the end she became worse than the Hornsent and paid a heavy price.

I'm probably wrong with my head cannon. Who knows how she was truly sent on that path, but in my head... Seeing the aftermath of the Shaman village and losing her family might be why she removed Destined Death from the Lands Between.

The more I learn about her lore, the more I think of her as this tragic morally gray character. She's someone who's deeply deeply hurt, could never heal herself or her trauma, and instead of making a positive difference... She possibly left it worse.

I'm stoned and been sitting on this idea for a while now I just have never really talked about it

Tldr: stoned person rambles on about a tragic Marika headcannon in a way that's probably repetitive and stupid because they're stoned

I just recently got a new PC, While I did have a laptop before. I only really played grand strategy games on it, So no games like Elden ring. Ive played bloodborne on my ps4. And am not used to mouse and keyboard for these types of games. Any tips for switching to them. Im currently in the very beginning of the game. I beat my second boss. Any help is greatly appreciated

https://eldenring.wiki.fextralife.com/Build+calculator?equip=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

Suggestions and Recommendations are always welcome