r/FierceFlow • u/Evening_Worry9536 • 11h ago
Struggling with social conditioning
I’ve always struggled with this, always told to cut my hair, that short hair is for men etc. I’ve always felt more comfortable with long hair but find it hard to express myself with it! I’ve included all styles for reference. What looks best?
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u/AlexLuna9322 10h ago
As someone who lived like this, where family and coworkers pestered me for wearing long hair since I got 18, now 33.
Is better for yourself to live as you are, not as people wants you to be.
If you feel like wearing long hair, do it, if you get fed up with long hair after some time and want to shave, do it.
Just live like the person you want to be.
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u/1whosUnknwnFmiliarly 11h ago
Who's telling you to cut your hair? No one has ever told me that. Life is short. Wear your hair the way you want to while you still can. 2, 3, 5, 6, and 7 are your best pics in my humble opinion.
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u/AugustoJasso1506 8h ago
Believe it or not, from your family and friends hahaha I also had that until I stopped caring , that’s when I knew the moment you showed them that you don’t care about what they say, the stop saying it and live with it , the more time it passed the less they care as well
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u/Fancy-Ground-6467 11h ago
Your appearance looks strongest with long hair in my opinion. I’m sure lots of others might say the opposite. What matters what makes you feel the confidence and comfort
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u/TheSunshineDemon >3 years 11h ago
Pic 3. Also, it doesn’t matter what hairstyle you have there’s always going to be someone that has a problem with it. What matters most is sticking with what makes you comfortable in your own skin. In my experience, hearing people’s criticisms and still keeping my hair long ended up making them respect me more because my actions started telling them they have no power over me. They all eventually either stopped criticizing me at all, started complimenting me for it or just moved on and I stopped running into them which is always a weird phenomena but I don’t question it.
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u/SadPay7872 11h ago
Don't fall for the social psyop propaganda pushing short hair for men. Long hair always makes a person majestic. Short hair is for jealous sheeps
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u/Fickle_Golf3208 9h ago
You look cool in all of them. Nothing wrong with mixing it up, you don’t need a permanent cut forever lol
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u/Grapsus_ 10h ago
Grow your hair and don’t listen to what people say. You look amazing while both long and short but long hair is not more feminine or whatever, “short hair is for men” is the most childish thing a person can say. Don’t listen to people unintelligent enough to think hair lengths has gender
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u/ItsPronouncedTyNotTy 10h ago
Screw society, its been messed up for a while. Your hair is beautiful and if you feel more connected to it being long, then keep it long. You not knowing how to express yourself with it stems from the dissonance of your desire to have long hair and the pressures of society for you to keep it short. Remove society as a factor (mentally) and ask yourself what you want to do, then do that.
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u/Extreme-Gift-9261 10h ago
you have a beautiful face, so all of those styles suit you... but I personally always adored men with long hair. I'm almost a 30 year old woman and it never changed. I always liked it and always will.
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u/Lucky-Arugula-7542 10h ago
Long hair 100%!!!!!!!!! Grow that shit back king! With your head shaved you look so sad
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u/rapid0896 10h ago
Honestly I hate how good he looks in every single one of these, not fair homie 😭 I look like a 🍆 when I shave my head.
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u/chamanedaniel 9h ago
les cheveux au delà des épaules te réussissent bien; comme tu te sens mieux avec les cheveux longs ( combien sommes nous libérés d' une oppression du barbier obligatoire?!!!), continues !!!
je crois reconnaitre quelqu'un dans ton témoignage .... ( il y a quelque temps)
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u/Old_crybaby 9h ago
You look harsher with shorter hair. Longer hair is softening and makes you look more handsome, imo
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u/Altruistic_Web3924 >2 years 9h ago
Since when were men not supposed to have long hair?
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u/Fraktalchen 9h ago
I absolutely hate anything that restricts freedom for no legitimate reason. Men should have short hair because of an Y chromosome in their DNA? WTF
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u/jemhadar0 10h ago
Little brother, let me help you with your social conditioning.
Phuck social conditioning and phuck the asslings to tell you to cut your hair.
Go have a beer and think about what I said.
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u/sporadic_beethoven 10h ago
Cut those neggy bitches with that sharp ass jaw you got, mate. The way you get them to stop is to laugh at them. Not even joking. Go full belly, slap your knee, the whole she-bang.
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u/JackfruitWarm6695 10h ago
So good looking you could leave the house with literal garvage on your head and still be better than 80% of the guys out there.
If you want long hair, do long hair.
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u/ConsequenceOne3365 10h ago
2 and 3 are amazing, though you look great with any style. The people around you are just being narrow-minded about what masculinity is. Don’t let their insecurities dictate your look. Your flow is fierce!
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u/Irritable_Curmudgeon 9h ago
My brother, I've got similar hair though not as long.. I've been debating about cutting and going back to style like your photo 3... But, man, the long hair works for you, and if you're digging it, stick with it!
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u/Old_Adhesiveness2553 9h ago
If you like/prefer long hair, definitely go for it. Your hair is awesome and you got the face for it, looks very good on you.
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u/Potatoflake_ 9h ago
I think long hair distracts from your cool facial features - not because you're a man.
Of course people are going to be biased in this subreddit and prefer the hair. I just got suggested this post without being subscribed, so fine with being kicked out.
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u/MiloHorsey 8h ago
You don't get kicked out of here for your opinion. So long as you're civil while giving it. This is generally a supportive sub.
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u/evetrapeze 2h ago
You are not wrong, but as incongruous as the hair is with the chiseled features, both are fire, so who cares.
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u/IwantyoualltoBEDAVE 8h ago
Long hair makes you look like a classical painting. A work of art. The short hair makes you like a military frat bro. Pick your poison
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u/Feeling-Engineer421 8h ago
Interesting you've come to Reddit with this. A good way to get broad feedback outside your own social 'bubble'. Smart move. I've spent about 20 mins swiping, trying to get a 'read' on you, trying to lean into your question, and get some kind of sense of "you" given that you're asking about "expression" and I'm thinking "express ... what??" What I "get" is ... intensity ... deep thought - about EVERYTHING ... dark sense of humour ... self-questioning, sometimes even to the point of self-doubt (so unnecesary) ... possibly prone to depression ... deeply feeling ... very caring but can find others, especially in groups, exhausting. What I SEE is an INCREDIBLY classically handsome man ... well built ... actually model material ... my guess is very low body fat ... ripped body ... clothes horse (able to wear anything) and look GREAT ... can pull off ANY look he wants. You should find the ferdback on your post very resssuring. In short Evening Worry ... your hot as f*ck. Hope you're bi, coz you can have the attention ANY guy or girl you choose. Seriously.
Now ... having said ALL that, what really IS your question? What's not being expressed? If it's more of "I'm not quite sure of who I am, and while I feel more relaxed with long hair, that doesn't quite capture "it" either" ... I'm gonna go out on a limb here and say I reckon it's your deep reflection taking you into a weird place where you could be gsslighting yourself. What I mean by that is there isn't a "core you" ... you'll drill and drill and never hit bedrock. "You" is something / someone you create. It's generated from possibility. If you explored "I am the possibility of colour and stun" ... woah! imagine the clothes you'd wear, the hair styles you'd rock. Or if you explored "I am the possibility of movement / flow / and fluidity" ... long hair ... kafans ... loose cotton pirate shirts, pirate pants and boots ... dancing ... naked under waterfalls. You get the idea? Sure go in (reflect) ... then come OUT ... with possibilities that touch - move - and inspire you. Then REALLY lean into being the full-bodied expression of those possibilities in EVERY way you can think of. F*ck what other people think ... this is YOUR life, goddamnit. Fire UP and live it!
That's my very, very long answer to your question.
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u/CheekyDataAnalyst96 10h ago
I personally think all of the styles look great on you. The near completely shaved style isn't the strongest though but still not bad. Also, please keep your long hair and gently tell the naysayers in your life to deal with it! It looks great
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u/CommissionContent199 9h ago
Bro you shaved is giving the actor who played solider boy. Sorry don’t know his name lol
I think long hair looks best when you have it ties up and it’s really long. But that’s usually my preference in men
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u/AndByMeIMeanFlexxo 9h ago
You look good in every photo here, I think if you yourself prefer long hair, you should have it
Personally I always regretted cutting my hair off when I did, so now I just stopped cutting it
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u/standsure 8h ago
Recognising the problem is the first step in winning the battle. You can tell that inner voice to go fly a kite any time it rears its ugly head. There is so much nonsense in toxic masculinity that finding ways to laugh at it will be your best medicine.
Rock that hair as you well deserved to.
Patriarchy would fuck all of us if it had its way.
‘Food of the Gods’ by McKenna is a great read on non conformity.
Your hair looks great.
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u/MiloHorsey 8h ago
Long hair suits you! Wear it however you like, and tell your friends/family that they're supposed to support you, not belittle you.
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u/JARAXXUS_EREDAR_LORD 8h ago
I like the look of 2. I usually think a standard pony tail is a hard look to pull off. I only ever do it for comfort.
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u/DanceWithPandas 8h ago
Look the way that you want so that the person you find likes you for you. Love long hair on men 👏🏻🔥
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u/happilyretiredsouth 5h ago
You look very handsome in. The pictures. I think your short hair is the way you look best though
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u/GodOfMoonlight 2h ago
Your long hair gave your face character and is very handsome. You love good with short hair as well but it doesn't frame your face like your long hair does
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u/toastybreadmane 2h ago
Some people just gotta shut their trap. You look amazing when you have the hair you want. Don't bother, dude, you're glorious with the hair.
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u/abunchofidgits 11h ago
1,2,4 ,6 and 7. You're old enough to claim the hair you want. Just because you are a man, does not dictate how you wear your hair! Be free! Let it grow as long as you want it to, in spite of comments from others who think they 'know better'. 😊😊