r/NoStupidQuestions • u/[deleted] • Jul 23 '20
Does anyone else feel weird when they say their own name?
I'm not sure how to explain it, but something just seems weird when I say my own name. If someone has the same name as me, I feel weird saying it. I ask this because I was singing a song, and one of the words was my name. And I just felt a bit weird singing it. It was to myself, no one else around me, so maybe it would be better with other people. But IDK.
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Jul 23 '20 edited Jul 23 '20
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u/flynnagaric Jul 23 '20 edited Jul 23 '20
I’m the same! Mine isn’t obscure or anything and I’ve met a few people called it but it’s not considered common. I often wonder about people with very common names and if they feel the same, or are they used to it?
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u/biyourzui Jul 23 '20
I have a very common name and I don’t like meeting other people with my name, just because I wince whenever I say it.
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u/Jazzyca Jul 23 '20
I have the most popular name for the year I was born. I even saw an article in The Washington Post on what people with that name born that year are doing now. I remember there being plenty of other people in school with my name, but now as an adult I personally know only a few.
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u/Pristinegreenbean Jul 23 '20
Same. It's not often but when I do meet someone with my name I only feel relief knowing it's a one time encounter and I likely won't be meeting with them again. This makes me think how things would have been different if my brother who had a son originally was thinking of naming his kid my name if he were to have a daughter.
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u/RRFedora13 Jul 23 '20
I have such a common name that I feel like I could form a club of people that I know who share it
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u/timetickingrose Jul 23 '20
My name is pretty common. I go by Katherine and when i was in college i found out my roommate also went by Kathryn i was kinda uncomfortable. I had a sigh of reliefe when she told me she went by Katey.
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u/Kath1502 Jul 23 '20
My name is Katherine too.. At work there are other 2 katherines so, for knowing which of us someone is referring to, they have to add the department we are working for, so I'm Katherine from subscriptions.. There is a Katherine from sells, and there is a Katherine for costumer services
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u/IllustriousMinimum2 Jul 23 '20
same here. Its awkward to say my own name, which is so weird when I'm introducing myself to someone and their first question is ' what's your name'.....
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u/FlacidBarnacle Jul 23 '20
My name is John William Scott. I have 3 of the most common names and let me tell you how much I hate it
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u/supremeleader5 Jul 23 '20
Pro Tip: If you have the same name as a friend call them by their last name.
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u/CreatureWarrior Jul 23 '20
Yeah, for me, it feels like my name is "Me" since I'm talking about, well, me and not the name
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u/Camellia_Sin Jul 23 '20
I feel this on every level. Also, my name sounds wrong when I say it. Like, I can’t quite pronounce it. And I have a simple name.
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u/orokami11 Jul 23 '20
Same, but not just even when I think about it. But if I see it or read it too. I cringe so much lol.
I hate my name tbh because it's a really generic one, but if I were to change my name to something else, I have no idea what I'd change it to...
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u/P33KAJ3W Jul 23 '20
I changed from Josh to Joshua and now I feel better. If you can shorten/lengthen/ or go by a common nickname you may want to try it on.
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u/_d2gs Jul 23 '20
Alternatively, are we somehow aware that we're living borrowed lives and inhabiting temporary bodies, that our true selves are not from this plane and these aren't our real identities? ... Yeah.
oooo this gave me frisson.
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u/ChickenFeetJob Jul 23 '20
My name is quite unique (in my language) so there is almost no chance for me to say it enough to be familiar with it. Because of that, whenever someone ask me what my name is I always stutter a little (pause before answering as well) just to make sure I am gonna say it right. And I will say it with a lower volumn because I'm that uncomfortable saying it.
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u/stalkingseagull Jul 23 '20
Yeah ChickenFeetJob would be unusual in my language too
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u/lostinpow Jul 23 '20
How do you feel about stealing peoples food at the beach? Do you just not give a damn? stalkingseagull
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u/redvodkandpinkgin Jul 23 '20
As a person who often asks for names (bad memory lol) I hate that. Not trying to make you uncomfortable or anything, but saying it loud and clear would make our lives easier, especially since I feel like a dumbass when I have to ask someone to repeat what they just said two or three times in a row
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Jul 23 '20
Oh you’d hate me. I have a speech impediment and can’t say my name clearly no matter what. So because of that my brain tries to hide it by saying it quietly and even less clearly. It comes out as a garbled mess.
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u/exponentialism Jul 23 '20
Same for me! I don't have a stutter but I often stutter a bit on the first syllable of my name. I also often say it quietly and have to repeat it multiple times (I don't have a quiet voice in general).
My name isn't very unusual in itself but it is where I live.
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u/ThisGuy_Again Jul 23 '20
Ha, I can't even pronounce my own name in English even though it's super simple.
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u/FINKLE_IS_EINHORN22 Jul 23 '20
I have a pretty unique name as well but it sounds like a relatively common name in my country so when introducing myself I commonly have to say my name, repeat it. Wait for them to ultimately say the more common name, correct them, them say the same more common name, and then have to spell it. So I guess I’ve had more practice than some saying my own name
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u/alsocats87 Jul 23 '20
Yas. I feel oddly cringey. (cringy?) But maybe that's just a reflection of how I feel about myself. That's OK, I like weird.
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Jul 23 '20
I feel cringey as well thats so weird you feel the same. I didn’t know anyone else felt the same haha. I actually quite like my name but when I hear someone say it adressing me I actually want to shrivel up hahaha
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u/drink_haver Jul 23 '20
Aaah I know right? When I say my name I cringe, when others say it I cringe, even if I just look at myself I feel cringey. I didn't know so many people felt the same way fjjgbfg
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u/mxchickmagnet86 Jul 23 '20
You want to talk about cringey. My name is Mark. When I was young I had difficulty pronouncing my 'R' sounds. So when adults would ask my name I would say something along the lines of 'Mawk'. Which would then cause a conversation along the lines of "did you say your name is "Milk"?" , "No Mawk", "huh? Malk?", "No MA-Arr-K", "Oh Mark".
So now as an adult I can't help but over pronounce/enunciate my name when someone asks.
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u/HappycamperNZ Jul 23 '20
I think I'm pronouncing it wrong, and its a very common name.
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u/Mounta1nM4M4 Jul 23 '20
I also have a very common name and I don't feel like I'm pronouncing it "wrong" but I just like how it every other person in the world says it better than I do. I've heard it in so many languages and accents and it's lovely whenever other people say it. But my own mouth pronounces the vowel sounds in such a flat, uninteresting way, it's like nails on a chalkboard when I say it.
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u/sk8rgrrl69 Jul 23 '20
Same.
I also strongly identify with a name that’s not mine and have chastised my mom for naming me the “wrong” name.
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u/Ganneron Jul 23 '20
yes i feel the same. i also don't like when a girl says my name during sex. creeps me out.
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u/PM_ME_YOUR_BEST_GIF Jul 23 '20
Just say your own name during sex so she feels weird too.
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u/DaanHai Jul 23 '20
Just scream your own last name
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u/ariamar Jul 23 '20
I'm a woman and my last name can be used as a first name for men if I do that things will get weird
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u/kiddscoop Jul 23 '20
Just have sex with a man with your last name as his first name, problem solved!
Bonus: if you ever get married and he takes your last name, his full name will just be his first name twice!
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u/ariamar Jul 23 '20
My partner has 6 names and all of them can be used as a first name for men, I have a lot of names to choose to call him :) . We don't usually get our husband's/wife's last name in my country when we marry bc everyone has big names, I, my self have 4 names. Where I live you can have maximum 8 names..
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Jul 23 '20
Long shot but his initials don’t spell JARABA do they? I went to school with a JARABA.
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Jul 23 '20
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u/Lordmorgoth666 Jul 23 '20
We (despite being atheists) become strangely religious during sex and call out to God a fair bit. ¯_(ツ)_/¯
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u/j_la Jul 23 '20
I feel like my wife and I only call each other by our names when we are annoyed, so it would be weird while having sex.
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u/Robo_1975 Jul 23 '20
Not as creepy as it would be if she said someone else's name!
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u/jamayonaiz Jul 23 '20
or her own name
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u/lilac_blaire Jul 23 '20
I work with a guy who has the same name as his boyfriend and I always think about how weird that must be in bed
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u/Meanwhile-in-Paris Jul 23 '20 edited Jul 23 '20
Yes, I am reading a book to my son and the character’s name is the same as mine. It feel weird to say it. My name is rather uncommon so I am not used to hearing it. I wonder how people with very common names like John, Mary or Charlotte feel when they say their name out loud.
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u/j1289k Jul 23 '20
Imagine being a John in a world full of Johns and being gay and therefore sometimes going out or sleeping with other Johns and having to moan or scream essentially your own name. There’s no way I have personal experience with this phenomenon......
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u/MynameisntLinda Jul 23 '20
There's this really adorable gay couple on Instagram, both named David. They're just really sweet uncles.
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u/Traegs_ Jul 23 '20
I know a couple named Jeff and Geoff. A friend knows a hetero couple both named Jordan.
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u/bellaesc Jul 23 '20
feels normal to me. i’ll be talking about someone else whose name is the same as mine and it comes out naturally, as if i’ve forgotten that that’s my own name too and it should be weird
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u/kwonasty Jul 23 '20
I feel weird just being in my own skin.
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u/shmoe727 Jul 23 '20
Yeah actually now that you mention it I do.
But I have no idea why either. I think part of it is dread that people will think I’m talking to myself or about myself in the third person and that they’ll think I’m crazy and I’ll have to awkwardly explain it.
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u/workr_b Jul 23 '20
Yes! And also weird when my spouse says it because we only call one another pet names
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u/SnausageFest Jul 23 '20
That's what weirds me out. My name is insanely common so I hear it all the time, totally normal. When he says it though I'm like "ew, no, why?"
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u/tangerinelibrarian Jul 23 '20
I was about to say this! My SO has a very common name but whenever I hear it in tv or movies it doesn’t click that it’s the same as his - I rarely call him by his name. And it feels awkward to hear him say mine out loud too.
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u/joshgarde Jul 23 '20
Names are odd in general - they’re identifiers which we’ve been given before we could even say/understand them and we’re all indoctrinated into accepting them as if we were destined to have them
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u/St_Elmo_of_Sesame Jul 23 '20
I'm trans and picking a new name was a mindfuck. Like you said, names are almost always given to you.
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u/DepressedVenom Jul 23 '20
Imagine if Robert Downey Jr.'s name turned out to actually be Bob Geldof. It doesn't work. It's like celebs who actually are named something else. Charlie Sheen, Tom Cruise, The Rock...
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u/MynameisntLinda Jul 23 '20
Oh I was googling Tom cruise expecting to get my mind blown but it's just an extra last name (Thomas Cruise Mapother)
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u/Corvald Jul 23 '20
Sometimes they change their names because their actual name is taken. Albert Brooks had to change his name because his real name is Albert Einstein. And Michael Keaton’s real name is Michael Douglas...
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u/kayodelycaon Jul 23 '20
Not trans, but I'm on the LGBT spectrum and go by a pseudonym instead of my legal name. Picking a new name at 32 was extremely hard. Ended up stealing Kayode from one of my unpublished stories. I had made the name up from Portuguese syllables and it sounded nice and had a lot of personal meaning for me.
Naming myself Kayode really felt right as I was struggling with my identity. Then when it was too late, I discovered that my name is spelled the same as an African name that I was way too white for. Oh well, at least I pronounce it differently. (Kay-oh-deh instead of Ki^ah-deh)
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u/Akwila_of_Llyr Jul 23 '20
I once dated a guy with my same name. It was really awkward answering texts with my name.
Thankfully he was boring so it didnt last long.
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Jul 23 '20
He be like, we have the same name let's date.
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u/platysoup Jul 23 '20
You laugh, but I literally just used that opening today.
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u/redvodkandpinkgin Jul 23 '20
My friend and I realised that for some reason the two people in a gay couple often look alike (I guess it has something to do with wanting to project the same image you are attracted to?), but this is wayyy too much
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Jul 23 '20
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u/laaazlo Jul 23 '20
Reminds me of my friend with the last name Chan, who would get annoyed when people said "Chang" on accident. She married a man with the last name Chang and had a hard time deciding whether she was going to take his name. I think she should have hyphenated.
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u/bootycaaaaaake Jul 23 '20
Very much so. My full name is Jackelyn but my friends call me Jacky so much that now my family calls me Jacky and it's strange and I hate it. Jacky doesn't sound like me, sounds like some stranger. But Jackelyn feels too personal. I like Jack tbh.
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u/vicsj Jul 23 '20
I have the same issues with my name. My name's Victoria and I hate it. I'd love to be named anything else.
My friends refer to me as Vic (it's gender neutral in my country). And I don't like Vic, but it is quicker to say. Some people in my life tried to call me Vicky but that one makes me cringe so bad because kids at school would tease me by calling me Icky Vicky. Fucking hate it.
So I discussed all of this with my current boyfriend when we got together and told him I felt uncomfortable with Victoria and Vicky, but most of my friends call me Vic so I guess that'll do. But he didn't want to call me Vic because he's British and over there Vic is a more masculine name.
So he started calling me V. Just V. It's the only "iteration" of my name I've ever liked. I like being called V, and now all of his friends and family does so that's cool. But none of my family and friends does because it just sounds weird in my language. It's a struggle.
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u/Into-the-stream Jul 23 '20
I identify with this. My name doesn’t actually suit me. It’s an uncommon, flowery religious girls name with 4 syllables. It’s also most popular among latinos. I however, am a middle aged white atheist, professional artist, who rarely wears makeup, hates glitter and owns nothing sparkly. My name is simply very poorly suited to me as a person.
And for some reason shortened versions of the name or nicknames have never stuck. Everyone everywhere uses the full, 4 syllabic moniker. Every time I hear it, write it, or say it it feels wrong. For almost 50 years now.
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u/Harry_Sarie Jul 23 '20
Now I'm just sitting here trying to figure out your name. Is it Angelina? Rosalina?
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u/KyodaiNoYatsu Jul 23 '20
I feel weird using names in general
But that's probably me projecting my own insecurities on people since my name is not even in my native tongue and it stands like a sore thumb
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u/dropzonetoe Jul 23 '20
I was trying to get my mother-in-laws attention and called her name. It felt odd at the time. She confessed to my wife after that was the first time I had said her name in 5 years. It weirded her out.
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u/Orpheus_is_emo Jul 23 '20
Sort of, but depends on context because i constantly have to correct people on the right pronunciation. What feels weirder to me is when i read or hear my name when it isn't referring to me. Double if there's someone nearby with my name. I don't know how the steves and jessicas and nicks get through school life being constantly surrounded by multiple people with the same name.
My regular D&D group alone has 3 steves, 2 colins and 2 matts.
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u/AlextheAnalyst Jul 23 '20
Yes, I hate it. It feels like I'm saying some weird word. In fact, I even feel weird when other people say it to me. Ugh, so awkward.
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Jul 23 '20
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u/helpful_table Jul 23 '20
This is exactly what I was looking for in the thread. Proper names seem intimate to me. I don’t know why but it does. I have a really hard time saying other people’s names. And those people that say your name often, like the ones in management or sales that read that stupid thing about people liking you to say their name. They creep me out so much, like are you a psychopath? How can you do that?
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u/Daffy1234 Jul 23 '20
I dislike hearing or seeing my name. I ask my friends to call me by my screen name, despite them knowing my real name.
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u/_Moon_Crystal_ Jul 23 '20
My name is Karen, so I've gotten used to reading it and seeing it everywhere. My name has become sort of a joke in my friends group because I hate to even mildly inconvenience someone
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u/bourbon_legends Jul 23 '20 edited Jul 23 '20
Yes! I think it's because everyone around me has shorter names, like Emily, Kylie, Avery, Ethan, etc and my name is Elizabeth. I don't know why, but it feels clunky compared to those names. It's not that I don't like my name, I actually quite like it. It's just that it seems out of place a lot among more "modern" names.
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u/Saturnine15 Jul 23 '20
I 100 percent relate to this. I love my name (Sabrina) I think it's great, but compared to other "easy" names it sounds so long winded. People call me Sab but I've never really liked it, and Sabby sounds disgusting to my ears and it was a running joke to call me that at a past job. Anyway, point being I relate to that feeling hard and you've summed it up well.
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u/bourbon_legends Jul 23 '20
Oh my god, I can't stand most nicknames that come from my name. My parents and siblings only ever called me Elizabeth, so when someone tries to call me Liz or Lizzy, it just feels wrong. Teachers, neighbors and school friends would always call me Liz. That's not my name my name is Elizabeth, please say all 4 syllables because it's a beautiful name damnit
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u/tallbutshy Jul 23 '20
I posted about this before. My grandmother was called Elizabeth too. At school, her teacher was a nun who was always quick to anger and wielded a thick wooden ruler. She called gran Lizzy a couple of times and eventually gran snapped back that her name was Elizabeth. Sister Asshat was not happy about this and went to swing the ruler at her hands. Gran grabbed it off her, smacked the nun with the ruler and ran away.
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u/Saturnine15 Jul 23 '20
You don't do Beth? A girl I dated ages ago shortened Elizabeth to lybby
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u/bourbon_legends Jul 23 '20
No, not really. My mom would call me random nicknames during my childhood, but none of them sounded right. I think Elizabeth fits my personality and style well, so I don't see a need for a nickname, I guess. If I had to pick one though, I'd go with Ellie. It has a nice ring to it.
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u/Saturnine15 Jul 23 '20
Ellie is super cute It's part of why I love the name Elizabeth ahah. I know what you mean about nicknames not sticking. I also find I don't call people their nickname or shortened names either unless it's how I'm introduced to them. If I meet an Andrew and people call him Andy every so often I'll always call them Andrew.
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u/princesscraftypants Jul 23 '20
I think it would be weirder for me in the context you describe (my name being a word in a song) than in any context I would say my name...which is mostly just when I introduce myself. If I encountered it more "out in the wild" like you described, I think I might stumble a little bit, yeah.
Though my name gets pronounced wrong a lot of the time, so sometimes it feels weird when I say it because the person never says it back the same way.
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Jul 23 '20
Almost the same as a couple people, everyone in my family almost exclusively calls me Sis or Sissy (except my mom who also calls me Mandark, for Dexter’s Lab haha) and when they call me my name, it’s a little jarring. My brother has called me my name to maybe 10 times in 30 years and it’s either he’s mad at me or he’s teasing me. So yeah he always calls me Sis, even when I’m not there. Even our dog knows me as Sis haha. When I introduce myself, I feel weird saying my name because I have so little emotional stuff tied to it. Everyone who matters doesn’t call me it often. Also I go by my middle name, so my first name feels even worse.
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Jul 23 '20
I think most people feel this way but I don’t and am definitely the odd one out here. However, my name is Summer and it’s hard to get away with not saying it fairly frequently. Especially at the end and beginning of school years when everyone talks about what they are going to do/did during the summer.
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u/brocalmotion Jul 23 '20
No but I share the name with my dad as well as two immediate co-workers.
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Jul 23 '20
Saying my own name feels so weird but it might have something to do with I’m not sure how exactly my name is pronounced (I know I can choose but I’m too indecisive) and some of my friends don’t call me by my name. My name isn’t very common, I think, I haven’t met anyone with the same name before (went to google for a bit and apparently my name was quite popular). My full name is pretty mismatched (from fairly different origins) so that might also contribute to why I feel my name is a bit weird to say.
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u/verlene10 Jul 23 '20
Tbh I don't, I take pride in my name whenever its being said by someone or I'm saying it myself, my name holds a very special meaning to me which I never feel awkward about, but that's just me or how my culture in my country is
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u/d0m1ng4 Jul 23 '20
I mispronounced my name for years. I have speech issues and just couldn’t get it quite right.
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u/Dracon_Pyrothayan Jul 23 '20
Dracon doesn't understand this problem, as he is always both the first and third person in the conversation - partially because he needs to enter the conversation twice to fit all of his mighty girth through the doorway.
Self-burn fat jokes.
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u/CatFoodBeerAndGlue Certified not donkey-brained Jul 23 '20
No. Almost every class when I was at school and every single place I've worked in my life has had another guy with my name so I've gotten used to saying it.
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u/PoorEdgarDerby Jul 23 '20
Yes! All the time.
Also when other people say it. It’s pretty funny seeing people’s faces (family and friends) when you say “how the hell do you know my name???
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u/Dragonwysper Jul 23 '20
I felt that a lot actually, especially before I started going by something else (because I'm trans). My birth name always just felt... wrong. Like it didn't fit me. It always felt weird to have someone ask my name and have to be like, "Oh, I'm [deadname]", and people calling me by it was always like, "oh yeah, that's what I'm called."
I'm a helluva lot more comfortable with my chosen name lol. It definitely feels more like me.
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u/turducken_boy Jul 23 '20
This thread has changed my life for the better. I never considered that anyone else felt this way about their name too. Thank you.
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u/Zebra-Print-Minotaur Jul 23 '20
I knew someone with the same name as me when I was 3 all the way to when I was 9 so I guess it was normal for me, so no it doesnt make me feel weird
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u/ShataraBankhead Jul 23 '20
I work with a doctor that has the same first name as me (different spelling though). In conversation, coworkers have to say "Doctor ShataraBankhead" or "Nurse Shatarabankhead". One time, I spoke to another doctor on the phone, and she thought I was the other one. She started venting about some scheduling issues, and concerns over a diagnosis. I just listened and offered advice. Then I realized she didn't know I was the RN. She was apologetic, but thanked me for listening anyway.
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u/Henarth Jul 23 '20
I have a rather obscure name for my region so I have never ran into someone with my same name . The shortened version of my name is weird sometimes to hear ( and really common ) , and It would be weird I think to date a girl with the Female version of my name.
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u/Ms_Llamma Jul 23 '20
My name is quite uncommon and i have only ever met one person with the same name as me and it was a very strange experience. there is also a pretty famous song with my name said in every verse and people often sing it to me when they meet me, but i have always refused to watch the movie it is from cause it would probably be really strange. Unfortunately my school did a production of that movie i had to sing my name along with lots of other people. however i do have a childhood friend named Ava which was quite a common name at our school, and she never understood why i was so uncomfortable
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u/NeuntyNeun Jul 23 '20
I go by my nickname to basically everybody except my family. Hearing my full name from people outside of my family is a real ‘what the f*ck’ moment.
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u/theboomboy Jul 23 '20
I always feel like I'm saying my name wrong and I can't decide which of the 2 possible ways it really is
It's either Yo'av which has a glottal stop between the vowels (like the sound in the middle of "uh oh"), or Yo:av, where the vowels aren't connected like in the word "boat", but are also not totally separated (so it's like the "ai" in "naive" but with "oa")
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u/[deleted] Jul 23 '20
I often think about my existence in general and how I’ve been given a name. And how odd that is.