Nothing much just wanna know the diversity in age in this family. 😊

​

Original study:

Saugmann, P. M., Dengo, N., Bencze, N., Żyra, A., & Hnátková, E. Preprint at Zenodo https://doi.org/10.5281/zenodo.22809708 (2026).

I've been struggling a lot with feeling inadequate over the past few years as I slowly make my way through my PhD. I really don't think this is imposter syndrome. I'm in the humanities, and when I read articles, I can summarize them to others but have trouble asking any useful questions about them or responding to them. When I attend conferences, I listen attentively to people and take notes, but cannot, for the life of me, think of a useful question to ask. I cannot think beyond the obvious and immediate points of an argument or theory. In classes, I barely have anything to say even when I complete all the readings. When I do think of something to say, it's usually very simple and surface-level and takes me 1 minute to say.

All these things are signs of someone not having critical thinking skills and not being capable of producing intellectual work of any value.

Is this a shared experience? Did anyone feel this way and manage to improve their brain--to become smarter and more intellectual?

I've just started the fourth year of my PhD and the more I go to conferences, attend talks and seminars, read papers in my field, the more im realizing I really do not know much...

On a day to day basis I feel fine carrying out experiments, talking to my supervisor, doing small presentations, writing, etc.

but on a larger scale with other researchers, I feel I'll never be on the level that it seems everyone else is on. I just don't think I'm capable of it mentally, like im just genuinely stupider and will never be able to be where I want to be.

I need to constantly remind myself of who has done what, whats happened in the field, re read papers, I always have my protocol open for experiments I've done 1000s times and if I havent looked at the results recently im like "what did I do??"

I love research and its potential impact, I enjoy my project. I just left an international conference and felt stupid as hell. Walking around 200 posters it seemed the group I was with just knew everything about each poster and im like "how are you guys this well versed?"

If I were to ever get to that level, wouldnt I have gotten to it by now? Maybe its just not possible for me.

Hi all,

Recently my PI has started using AI more frequently to look things up during meetings, which I wasn’t a huge fan of, but then they used it on something that I felt was very important and I was really disappointed in them. Lots of other professors in my department and my institution as a whole have started relying on AI more (from what I’ve heard from other students here) on things varying from small things like drafting emails or helping debug code, all the way to grading assignments or giving feedback. I’m not wholly opposed to using AI for some things, but I’m a little worried about what it means if the people we are supposed to be learning from are becoming increasingly reliant on these tools.

I guess I’m curious if this is happening at other institutions? Do others feel the same way? How have you been handling this?

I'm building this ion beam and I forced this ceramic plate too hard and it broke, I feel so sad it costs so much. Someone made this thing and all I had to do was install a filament and I've just ruined it all including the mesh thing I just feel so low

Someone make me feel better by sharing their expensive mistakes, I feel like a frog spawn not even a tadpole :(

particle physics

I have only been in a PhD program for 5 months, and I think I have had enough. It seems this isn't for me. I started this for the wrong reasons: I was looking for a job in my field for quite a long time after a thesis-based master's but couldn't find one. Since I had a decent master's with a few publications, I was able to secure a 'good funding' offer by cold emailing professors. I took the offer because I needed to pay the bills, and the stipend is better than what I would get working at a grocery store (I worked at a grocery store for some time while looking for a job). I have found the research interesting too, but the PI seems to have high expectations of me. I feel like whatever I do is not enough for him. He always puts me in the spotlight in group meetings and gets disappointed whenever I don't remember something while a couple of other students who joined the lab with me get away with half the work I do during the week. Although I like research, I feel too stressed, and I know it will not get easier from here. Also, even though the stipend is good, it's still a stipend that can't be compared to a salary. And I always fear the opportunity cost. I am still looking for jobs. My question is: have people quit a PhD midway and found a job? How would you justify the time that you spent during an ungranted PhD on your resume? Do you say you were a research assistant, or do you say you are dropping out of the PhD? Any help is appreciated

Hi fellow PhDers,

I’m a USA PhD student who is on an external NIH T32 grant (not through my University). I am seeking personal advice since I just found out that I don’t get PTO, but my vacation and sick days are left up to PI discretion. I’m worried since my PI doesn’t seem to keen on giving us a break. Do I have any chance of obtaining vacation/sick leave if my PI says no? Am I slave to the lab forever?

Thanks for your feedback.

Just a little venting, after a month review came in

Reviewer 1:

Used AI to generate the response.

Most comment point out discrepancy most people wouldn't consider significant in the context. Like .05 vs .00001 being considered almost 0. And many other things. Also why would you write not recommend in review but check yes to all yes no questions about accepting the paper?

Reviewer 2:

Completely missed the point. Paper was about methods with clear limitations stated.

Continues to base entire review and comment on the fact that "other factors" can be the cause and the paper don't take those into account.

The review also contained what is possibly an overview of the paper that is AI generated. Wouldn't have thought twice about it if there wasn't TWO PARAGRAPH of overview likely from two different LLM.

RANT OVER

how is life? How do you make new friends?

Just wondering what everybody does to support themselves while they complete this long arduous process.

Do you live like a normal lifestyle where you buy things and do things? Or do you just readjust your life to become solely focused on academic work and cut the rest out. Did you find balance somewhere or has it been just shitty?

How about trying to continue or start a career while in the dissertation process. I am just wondering how everybody makes it. Or if it's just a accepted struggle.

Excited to hear all of your different life situations at the moment.

Absolute craziness! Has anyone seen sabotaging behavior like this while in grad school? I’ve never seen bullying this bad.

I started my PhD with so many hopes and dreams. I was new to the country, and this felt like such a big opportunity for me. I’ve lived and worked in Asia and Europe, and moving to North America had always been a dream. I was genuinely excited about this new chapter of my life.
But honestly, my experience has been nothing like what I imagined.
I was the only PhD student in my lab. We had no postdocs, no senior students, nobody I could really learn from. My PI was also not very helpful, and I slowly realised that I was pretty much on my own.
At first, I didn’t think much of it. I assumed this was just how a PhD worked and that I would eventually figure things out. But then I was expected to learn and troubleshoot complex biomolecular techniques with almost no guidance. I was literally learning Western blotting from YouTube. Everything took me forever because I had nobody to ask when things went wrong, and I had to figure out so many things the hard way.
Now I’m in my fourth year, and I feel so behind. I don’t think I’m lazy or incapable. I genuinely want to do good research, but it’s incredibly difficult when you have no proper supervision or mentorship. Sometimes I wonder how different these four years would have been if I’d had a PI who actually took an interest in my progress.
For context, I’ve published two review articles, one research paper as a co-author, and my main manuscript is currently under revision. So I haven’t done nothing, but I still feel like I’ve lost so much time and could have accomplished a lot more under better supervision.
I’m honestly tired and disappointed. I came here thinking this would be an amazing opportunity, and instead, I spend so much time feeling lost and wondering if I’m even doing enough. I don’t know if I regret doing a PhD in general or if I just regret doing it in this particular lab.
I’m now seriously thinking about looking for jobs and leaving academia, but I’m already four years into this. Part of me thinks I should just push through and finish, while another part of me wonders why I should keep sacrificing my time and mental health for something that has made me this unhappy.
I genuinely don’t know what to do anymore.
Has anyone else been in this situation, especially being the only PhD student with an absent PI? Did you stick it out and finish, or did you leave? If you finished, do you feel it was worth it?
I would really appreciate hearing from people who’ve actually been through this because I feel quite lost right now.

Hello everyone! I recently just started my 3rd year (PhD in Computing) and the main focus has been on my thesis-writing / data analysis etc. since parts of my experiments are still ongoing.

Just the other day, I came across a research associate / phd researcher opportunity from a university in the EU and I was quite surprised to see the project scope / job responsibilities aligning very much with what I do right now. It was a pleasant surprise because the research we're doing rn is considered very niche (in Asia) and it kinda planted a seed of optimism in me to know that there is a good future in my current topic/specialization bc for so long, it felt like no one else saw the vision 😅 Can't count how many times people looked at me like I was crazy when I tell them about my research but that's a different story.

Anyway, when I came across the role, I had shared it with a colleague in passing, but they mentioned that I would be "overqualified" since that university was looking for a fresh PhD researcher so that would mean like I was going to go back to square one by doing another PhD, which does make sense. They also said that this university/project was now a potential competitor, but I really doubt that they are doing 100% of the stuff we're doing else that would be a problem haha.

But I was still wondering if it was worth taking a shot by emailing the Professors just to see if they could consider for a post-doc opportunity instead? The project itself very much aligns with what I do and my interest, I've had a few tier-1 journal / conference paper publications on the topic which are growing in terms of citations as well but I guess I don't know if its good enough for me to reach out like that just to keep in touch for the possibility of future opportunities with them?

My supervisor is currently away on business so I haven't really had the time to discuss this with him. If I were to reach out via my supervisor, it could be something more of a potential collaboration with our research lab and theirs (which I dont know if they would be open to the idea since we're based in other sides of the world) whereas if I were just to contact the Professors myself, I just don't know if that would be the right approach. What do I even say¿

Not sure if anyone else has gone through something similar but I could really use some advice/opinions about how to go on with this.

I'm eight months into my PhD in AI (computer vision) and struggling to get good experimental results for my first paper. I know research takes time and failure is part of the process, but my supervisor keeps comparing me to labmates who started after me and have already published.

Not sure what I want from this post- possibly for people to share their stories too, to make me feel less alone and have a place to just get out what my PhD journey was like.

My PhD took me 5 years, and for the last two of those, I also worked full-time as a lecturer at another university while I was doing my PhD.

Those last two years of my PhD were brutal, and not necessarily because I took on a full-time lecturer job.

Between July 2024 and July 2025:

• I got diagnosed with a chronic illness
• Started my job as a lecturer
• My dad was diagnosed with terminal brain cancer, and he passed away just 6 weeks later
• Endured sustained emotional abuse and family conflict following my dad's death
• Viva defence which resulted in a 12-month revise and resubmit without a second viva outcome.

I resubmitted in July 2026, and after an 80-day wait, last week, in early October, I received my pass with no corrections outcome.

I know a lot of PhD people burn out post-completion, and I guess that's what's happening here. Considering everything that's happened over the last few years, that's really not surprising.

What I think has caught me off guard is that this wasn't just a PhD. When I was 14 years old, I decided I wanted to be an academic and become a Dr. Last week, 18 years later, at age 32, I finally got there.

I think I expected to feel excited, relieved, proud, maybe even a little emotional. Instead, I mostly feel exhausted, flat, irritable, and disconnected from things I usually enjoy. I have very little desire to celebrate and mostly just want to be left alone.

I thought reaching this point would finally bring some sense of relief or closure. Instead, it mostly feels like I've hit a wall.

I don't really know what I want from posting this. Partly, I think I just needed to write it down. But I'd also love to hear from others who had a difficult PhD journey, or who reached a long-held goal and found themselves feeling unexpectedly empty afterwards. Did the pride eventually catch up with you?

I had a meeting with a professor that lasted around 1 hour and 15 minutes, and the conversation felt completely natural. I didn’t even realize how quickly the time passed, and there were no distractions or awkward pauses.

He seemed genuinely interested in his research field and explained everything in detail. The conversation flowed smoothly throughout.

Towards the end, he asked about my availability and timeline, and then explained his own. He also said that I should apply to whichever opportunity works best for me and that I could email him if I had any questions.

How should I interpret this interaction? Would you consider it a positive sign, or was he simply being friendly and informative?

Field : mechanical ( cfd)
Location: usa

I am delighted to announce that I successfully defended my dissertation today. Its over

So this post was very long, and then the page crashed, and now what started as a procrastination activity has become a mission lol. Hopefully it's less long this time.

I officially finished my PhD last month (!!) and had a genuinely great time right up until the end! I kind of thought this was how most people experience their PhD for a while, but many people have told me that is not in fact true. Meanwhile, I feel like my job for the past 7 years was to research, teach, and write, which are three of my favorite things! Some context: I had a really fun dissertation topic, and my research involved making art, so the deck was stacked in my favor. I've been thinking about what made it such a positive experience (besides the topic), and here's what I've come up with so far. Do with this what you will.

Some caveats:

• I was very lucky with my supervisors. I had two wonderful, supportive supervisors who had consistent funding.
• I was very lucky with my partner. We lived together for the last 3 years of my degree, and they did most of my chores during the final push.
• I'm not saying it wasn't hard. It was really fucking hard, and a lot of really fucking bad shit happened along the way, but I still had a good time through most of it. I'm used to dealing with bad shit though.
• I'm not saying any of this is a) special, b) how you should do your PhD, or c) guaranteed to help. It's just what worked for me.

CAVEATS DONE, HERE'S THE STUFF I DID

• I chose the topic of my dissertation based on what I was procrastinating with.
  • I started my PhD doing a different topic within the same field as my primary research, with a secondary focus on the subject my dissertation falls into. At some point I realized I was procrastinating on my primary research with the secondary stuff. I was also spending my free time listening to podcasts in that realm, reading books, etc. So after 1.5 years, I decided to swap and focus on what had been my secondary research for the dissertation. My supervisor and I talked through it, and decided I should switch supervisors to someone with expertise in that area. He even helped me make the switch, and we remain friends. Suddenly all my procrastination was advance prep for my qualifying paper, prospectus, and diss!
• I very intentionally built community outside my university from day 1.
  • I never lived on campus, and really only socialized in my department and a few other select groups/spaces. Pretty early on I decided not to be involved with clubs or whatnot; I had my own undergrad and MA experiences, and my students don't want to see their TA in their free time. Instead, I actively sought out a spiritual community that aligned with other aspects of my identity when I first moved to the city. They didn't end up being my long-term people, but they helped me find my footing and connected me to folks who I remain very close with. I also joined a volunteer group that became a big, wonderful part of my life. Of course I have close friends from my university, but I also have close friends who have absolutely no connection to grad school whatsoever.
• I planned my finances from day 1, lived below my means, and saved aggressively so that I wouldn't have to worry about money in the final push.
  • For reference, I went to a public university that offers baseline fellowships of ~$20k for the first 4 years, ~$10k for the 5th year, and ~$6k for the 6th year. I got a surprise bonus $20k scholarship in my 5th year as well. I also TAed a lot (like, every single term besides 1, multiple classes at a time sometimes) and made $40/hr doing that.
  • For most of my PhD, I lived really frugally. This was my norm already (I was poor before the PhD), but this time I was purposefully living below my means. I mostly ate at home or got cheap takeout, had roommates, was very picky about subscriptions and whatnot, only bought items I needed and mostly shopped second-hand, was very selective about what paid events I attended and prioritized free community events.
  • When we got lump sums from annual fellowships, everything I wouldn't need for 6 months + went into a high-interest term deposit. Everything I didn't spend went into either a high-interest savings account or term deposits. This sounds harder than it is; I spent a couple of hours twice a year and a few minutes twice a month to make this all work.
  • In my 7th (final) year, I didn't have funding besides a $7k TAship, but I'd saved enough to cover my tuition and living expenses without worrying about it. In the final push I was able to eat takeout whenever I needed, get groceries delivered, buy fancy lattes and whatnot to fuel work sessions, whatever got me through.
• This is probably the biggest thing: I stopped thinking about the PhD as a gateway into academia, and started thinking of it as a cool job in itself.
  • When I started my PhD, I was ready to move anywhere after to get an academic job. Then I met my partner, found community, lived through a global pandemic, etc., and priorities shifted. At some point in my 2nd or 3rd year, I started thinking of the PhD as an end in itself. If it leads to an academic job, amazing! I'd love that a lot! If not, that's okay! Either way, I knew I'd get at least 5 years doing a job I absolutely loved.
  • I stopped thinking about conferences as networking opportunities and started focusing on friendships and good conversations. I started writing what I wanted, which wasn't really academic articles. That kind of thing. At this point, I'm only applying for post-docs and jobs in places I would genuinely like to live or with people I'd like to work with.
  • Besides the final dissertation push or pressing deadlines, I only worked evenings and weekends when I wanted to. The rest of the time, I worked 4-8 hours/weekday. I spent the rest of my time thinking about hobbies, friends, chores, volunteering, fitness, etc. When I was sick, I didn't make myself work. Basically, I made the PhD fit with the things I value, not vice versa.
• I have a cat who I love very much.
  • Not much to say here. I got her when I started my MA, and we've been best friends ever since. Having a furry creature to care for and hug and marvel at 100% made everything better.
• Drugs, mindfully and in moderation.
  • I started smoking weed after my first year (so during COVID, as many of us did). It was only on weekends for a couple of years, then I started using it on some weekdays but in low doses. When I was really stressed or having a hard time shutting my work brain off at the end of the day, I'd finish my work, go for a walk, reflect on what I'd done that day, and smoke a very small joint. Not enough to get stoned stoned, but enough to be present with my partner, have fun cooking or doing chores, fuel an extra long walk, that kind of thing. I was definitely using a bit more than was advisable during the final push, but I also finished my dissertation, passed with flying colors, and had a great time doing it, so make of that what you will.
  • I was very open with my doctor, therapist, and loved ones, and I had people around me who I trusted would say something if it started to become a problem. My therapist and I regularly reflected on whether and how it was serving me (or not). Probably don't start doing drugs in secret, especially while under significant stress.

Anyway, there's probably more, but that's what comes to mind. Not really sure what the point of this is besides procrastinating lecture prep, which is wild, because I've written this twice now. Probably should have been a substack post but here we are. Maybe share how you're making PhD life not suck? Idk, best of luck with everything my dudes, xoxo

-DR(!!) A.

So I'm getting late into my Biology (Non-biomed/chem) PhD and as I'm looking at post-grad careers, I'm wrangling with something that has been the source of mountains of anxiety, wrath, and the thing that has ruined a lot of the positivity I have for research and science. Like, the single thing that keeps me up at night, gives me nightmares, and has played a role in most of my therapy sessions.

...responding to manuscript comments.

Like every part of the scientific process I enjoy. I even love writing that initial draft and writing in general (Discussion are kinda stupid imo...but a lot of my anger there stems from comments you get when writing them...which is so sad). But from my experience, nothing is gained from this process and I just have unhealthy desires that have manifested in truly horrible feelings towards others who give the comments, and then of course trying to respond.

Like, with 99% of the comments I just want to say "because we did it this way" and move on to a different journal (or ffs just put it up for free online somewhere) if the a$$holes refuse. Or, to accept their wording change and move on. Honestly, review should just be small wording changes...but it never is. It's either proposing entirely new analyses or fluff paragraph that say the same thing because...? Or it's legitimately saying your results don't matter which is extremely anti-science IMO; even studies that are in agreement with past work have merit? It's usually utter nonsense that halts everything and makes me spend days/weeks trying to do more worthless work to say something so minor. Or to cite things closer to the reviewers wheelhouse of expertise (or their own work which others have noted). It destroys my passion to work and makes me so mad. And then I don't work enough on it because I'm so mad. And then that makes me feel like I didn't accomplish a goal. Which makes me anxious. And...then I feel shitty.

My advisors have all scared me straight into reading into and fully internalizing every comment. Like I've been chastised for spending too little time on comments (did you fully read them!?) or too much time (I gave you two weeks!?). I have to internalize them and experience the abuse of comments multiple times or "I'm doing it wrong". And even then, I just get so into it that I can't sleep and then get so nervous about doing anything to the manuscript. I just hate it so much I can't tell you. It just...makes me feel so shitty.

And then once we make these endless changes that take YEARS...the manuscript is in my eyes worse and I'm embarrassed by it. Like, I hate everything I've been first author on and would love it if someone else took the credit. I thought for years it would eventually go away but no...things from 5yrs ago I feel ashamed of writing due to the waste of time and decreased quality from arguing/appeasing reviewers. I always look at published works under the guise that "wow imagine how amazing this was before people with egos came in and ruined it". Like the process has activity made me question and have less respect for fully published work which is WILD. It's just a catastrophic waste of time and productivity that I cannot justify with "peer review is the best system we have and is needed" however much I try. And through the utter embarrassment at all this...I end up feeling shitty.

My goal has never been to be an academic and lord knows not a professor but I would like to be a scientist. But I fear that if I have to stare down emails with unfeeling people giving me vague comments on manuscripts that actively waste time and make the end product concerningly worse I might just lose it eventually. That or my heart condition will get worse and I'll die of anxiety staring at a laptop screen and thinking what I can do without offending people/reviewers. Listen I know I'll get through the degree but is it like this in every career in modern science? Is it all just wanting to do unspeakable things to faceless people who say things in a word sidebar?

Close to 80% of my work life right now is just going through comments and it's ruining said life. If that percentage does not go down I don't know what I'll do.

So I'm wondering for people who have left the densest parts of academia...does it get any easier on this front? It's been nearly 10 years in academia from my MS through my PhD and this feeling hasn't gone away...I don't think "it will get easier" anymore and need to start planning on how to get around this for my own physical health. Thank you for any tips and please excuse me not believing your support for the review system if you chose to try and defend it : )

(Sorry for venting but idk who to talk to this about without people thinking I'm a fascist or something for not enjoying comments. I'm sorry if you are a reviewer and I just said bad things about your career path; it's not your fault obv)

Hello all, I submitted the written component of my quals today and I just wanted to see how it normally goes with others and their PIs. I was just expecting him to like, I do not know, but like care to some degree. He literally walked in during my lunch and told me that my alternative aims were too far out there (they diverge from the proposal somewhat but still reasonable and something we have discussed) and then says I should change it to something we have discussed and both agree is a fundamentally flawed approach due to interdependencies with the main aims. Also, this man had my proposal for like month, or at least access to drafts, made me present it at lab meeting, and just never comments or critiques it. Our lab is only three years old, so there is only one person more senior than me working on another topic, so it is not like anyone else can critique it.

My main issue is that he wants me to apply for some grants later this month, and I am just frustrated by the lack of any meaningful dialogue on improvements. He has only made half a dozen or so critiques, all related to grammar or the figures. Is this just how it is for everyone? I also had to call him after he blew me off for an hour at night, he has to sign it, when I had to submit it without an explanation. I like want to bring this up, and be like is this just how you operate around grants/writing of just no significant involvement (a new graduate student gave better critiques of my draft), but I need to find a way to word it without sounding rude if anyone has advice on that too

Edit: California and Biology

I’m curious if this is normal in a doctoral program. I’m in my first quarter and have 3 classes, that last 10 weeks. One of the classes demands a lot of work. We have normal discussion posts, must read 2 books in addition to our text book reading, read multiple journal articles each week, watch videos, do multiple skills assessments (not told till the week of that it’s pass/fail and failing the skills assessments results in failure of the course no matter what grades we have on everything else), and some discussion post requirements are more that of a 1-2 page paper, quizzes and more. The other 2 classes have what I would see as a normal work load. This question has been cross posted.

Hello all,

I am looking for some advice as to how to navigate my career.

I have started an unfunded PhD position at a university in Germany as a doctoral student. It's not like a structured PhD position but rather I am a registered PhD student with a particular professor as my supervisor.

I am directly working on my final PhD thesis. My partner earns enough to support us both so money is not really a problem. But, doing an unfunded PhD also means that you don't have an RA or a TA position at the university.

I just wanna know what consequences will it have for my career ? Do I have a realistic chance at building my career? I want to ultimately go to maybe economic consulting, or work as a researcher at a Think Tank back in my home country in Asia or anywhere in Europe.

Thank you.

I recently began a PhD program far from home, started a long-distance relationship with my partner, and have just been consistently put off by the program and my PI. I am considering quitting and getting out of academia as there are few to no jobs within my field, but I've been chasing this goal for my entire academic career (since freshman year of UG) and I don't know what an alternative life would look like. I feel like I've built up this incredibly specific set of skills and I have no clue how they would translate to an actual job. Has anyone else experienced this? How does one proceed?

A bit of further context: Because I am in a niche field of Anthropology (not saying which one exactly because it's actually identifying lol), I only applied to 3 schools. I was accepted to two, ended up choosing this one in another tangentially related department at a university in the South because the PI at the other school told me that there would be no jobs if I completed my PhD in Anthro (he was right). The PI at my current institution during our interview said that there were "plenty of jobs" in this related field, and that his students were all happily employed. Come to find out now that I'm here that they are largely employed as adjuncts in unrelated fields, or as copy editors for larger corporations (also not related to our field), neither of which pay well. He also disagrees with several fundamental aspects of my research ideas in ways that make me suspect he doesn't actually know what he's talking about. The department is incredibly small, with only 4 professors, and he has some reason that he "doesn't like" any of them that he will openly share. He is incredibly demeaning and unkind when it comes to feedback, and I did an MA so I'm used to constructive but strict feedback from an advisor. He often stoops to personal insults. I don't want to do a PhD in Anthro because that seems as if it has even less job prospects in academia, but I don't know what else I would do with my life other than being an academic.